Tales of the Oppressed
by Terran34
Summary: My name is Seth Rogers. I'm your typical college student trying to get a major in computer science. Except that all goes out the metaphorical door when some crazy guy running around in armor zaps me into a land filled with ridiculous looking ponies colored every color of the freaking rainbow. Or all of them, in one case. ... I want them to stay as far away from me as possible.
1. The Things I've Lost

I have no idea where to begin. Right now, I'm sitting in a cheap hotel, penning this in a recently bought notebook in an attempt to keep myself sane. God knows there hasn't been a decent person to talk to since getting here. No, everybody here is fucking crazy.

It would probably make more sense if I started at the beginning. Maybe if I go back through my most recent memories, I can make more sense as to what happened. At the time, I was in the middle of a mental breakdown.

My name is Seth Rogers, a college junior who attends college at Rainer State University. I worked my ass off in high school to get here, as I have a high end job waiting for me in a well known computer company if I can graduate from here. In essence, I have planned out my life since entering high school.

It's just another normal day for me as a student. Of course, normal usually means rushing to and fro my classes, or working hard at my desk if I didn't have anything scheduled for that day.

Unfortunately, Wednesdays are busy for me, as I have four classes crammed back to back. It seems grueling, but I actually enjoy this better. This way, I have longer breaks between class days to get my work done, or just read if I manage to square everything away. Or, hell, sometimes I hang out with the few friends I have.

Right now, I'm sitting in my third class of the day. It's foreign language, which is just simple memorization. Not to toot my own horn here, but that's just plain simple. That's why this is my least favorite class. Heh, that doesn't make much sense when I write it on paper. I suppose it's because if I'm not challenged in a class, I get bored really easily.

This is one of those days.

I sigh and let my face rest on my fist. While not entirely comfortable, this allows me to rest my head without the professor getting on to me. Yeah, I have a college professor that actually cares if someone's not paying attention. It's a damn hassle. I mean, this is college, not high school. It should be entirely our choice whether or not we're good students.

Additionally, in this position my short, wavy black hair falls down and covers the majority of my face, therefore allowing me to close my bright green eyes and attempt to get some sleep. You don't understand; at the time I was completely fried from two back to back tests. Praise the whatever that we were only studying the written language in this class.

The other students in the classroom are a mix of other men and women of various years whose names escape my mind. After all, they are the usual gossiping, over-dramatic people who I can care less about.

I suddenly jerk awake, which causes me to lift my head and look around to see if anyone had noticed. When I determine that no one had, I sigh again. I hate it when a minor dream awakens me like that. Resting my head on my fist again, I tried again to sleep, but find that I can't

I curse to myself, succumbing to that confounded boredom once again. It's times like this that I wish I had a way out. Why can't I ever get those spontaneous bloody noses at a convenient time? Like...now. My head droops. That's just wishful thinking on my part. I had my deviated septim fixed months ago.

My phone buzzes in my pocket, taking me by surprise. Who in their right mind would text me? I roll my eyes and take out the phone, expecting it to be my mother again.

Huh, it's actually not. It's from one of my only friends. Her name is Amaryllis. Her name is quite the mouthful, so everyone calls her Amy for short. Not me, of course. I think her first name is unique, unlike all the other shitty names I see people saddled with. Anyhow, I might as well see what she wants.

**You still in class?**

My lips curve into a smile, an expression only my friends can cause. Amaryllis is so cute in that she never shortens or abbreviates her words. Odd for text messages, don't you think? Not a single "lol" or even a "brb."

This is a welcome distraction from class, so I quickly tap out a reply on my Iphone and send it to her.

**Not for long.**

Class ends in twenty minutes, but if Amaryllis is asking me a question like that, she got out of class early and wants to hang out. Technically, I don't have time to hang with her because I have class right after this one. Fuck that, though. I already don't see her enough.

I stand up from my position in the middle of the class room, grabbing my bag and slinging it over my shoulder. I get some annoyed mutters from the other students in my row as I force my way past them, but I could really care less. What do I care if they find some action of mine rude?

As I head towards the door, the professor shoots me an angry glare, because she knows I'm cutting her class early. I return it with one of my own just before leaving the room. Bitch, I'm acing your class. Eat your heart out.

From here, it's just a short walk through a hallway, down some stairs, and out the double doors into the mildly chilly weather. I shiver involuntarily at the change in temperature. I'm telling you, fuck winter.

Just as I expected, Amaryllis is leaning against one of the stone pillars that support an awning that hangs over the front door of the building I just came from. She's as beautiful as always, despite the ice cold expression on her face. What really stands out about her is her hair. It's a glimmering crimson color and hangs lower than her waist. It still wows me every time I see it. Why can't I have hair that shines like that?

She gives a small, almost imperceptible smile as she sees me. I walk past her with a light gesture, and she falls into step beside me. I only have about thirty minutes before my next class, so I'm walking to the science building. We're quiet for a bit, but it's not awkward. This is how things generally go.

"How did your tests go?" Amaryllis finally broke the silence, gazing at me with her baby blue eyes.

"Just fucking great. There was crap on that last test that I've never seen before, and you know how I study," I snap irritably. Such a response may have taken a normal friend aback, but Amaryllis isn't like that. She's as mean and fucked up as I am, which is probably why we're such good friends.

"Perhaps you should have listened in his lecture. I know for a fact that professor uses a lot of material from his oral lectures only," Amaryllis points out, causing me to groan. She's right, but that only makes it worse.

"Can you not patronize me right now?" I ask wryly. A smirk crosses Amaryllis's face.

"What, do you want me to pat your back and say 'I'm sorry, you poor baby?'" she responds sarcastically, speaking the last bit in a bad imitation of my mother's voice.

"Fuck you."

"Dream on, Seth."

"Pah."

That is generally how we act when we're hanging out. Seems abnormal, doesn't it? No, we're just that good of friends. Practically every other word out of our mouths is an insult to one another, and yet we're tighter than siblings.

"What about you? How did your classes go?" I ask her after a moment of silence.

"Nothing worth mentioning. But I did run into Sam on the way out. He tried to start something." Amaryllis replies. That gets my attention. Samson, or Sam for short, is one of Amaryllis's ex-boyfriends. That one in particular was a nasty one, thinking he could 'tame' the wildness that is Amaryllis. Needless to say, that didn't end well for him.

"Oh really?" I say, raising an eyebrow. "I hope you beat the shit out of him."

"I broke his arm," Amaryllis returned, smiling. I quickly form a mental image of that bastard getting his arm broken, and I break out into a twisted grin. I just love it when people like him get what's coming to them.

"Good. Else I might have been tempted to do something to him myself," I grunted, feeling satisfied. Amaryllis raises an eyebrow herself at that statement.

"Oh? Feeling a bit protective of me, are you? You're so sweet, Seth," she quips, smirking. I scoff in derision at that.

"Not on your life. I just can't stand looking at his damn face," I shot back, but I'm obviously lying. I honestly would have torn that guy a new asshole if Amaryllis hadn't badass enough to do it herself.

We fell into silence once more, but it doesn't last long before a horror rock theme starts blaring from my phone. I recognize the caller without looking, since everyone on my contact list has a unique ringtone. I quickly take out my phone and click the answer button.

"What is it, mom?" I ask as patiently as I can. My mother, Elaine Rogers, never calls for purely personal reasons, so I can't just ignore it.

_"Hey, son. I know you have class in a bit, but do you have a few minutes to talk?" _Elaine's soft voice sounds from the speakers. I sigh a bit. As usual, she's asking nicely, but there's never a choice in the matter. Of course, that didn't stop me from trying.

"Well, I'm with Amaryllis because class let out early. Can it wait until after class?" I respond as politely as possible. You think I'm snarky? You don't ever want to see my mother annoyed.

"_Oh, hanging out with Amy? I see how things are." _The smug tone in her voice is enough to make me rub my forehead in irritation. "_Have you asked her out yet?"_

"I would appreciate it if you wouldn't make insinuations. Now what do you want?" I lash out viciously. I fucking hate it when she brings that up.

_"I was just calling to tell you about an internship your uncle's company is offering you, down in Chile," _Elaine continues on, seemingly ignoring my outburst. She was used to me, I guess. That tends to happen when you live with someone for twenty years. However, this bit of news has me a little excited.

"Really? All the way down in Chile? How would that work?" I inquire, interested. The fact that I'm getting an internship from the company I was aiming to work for one day means that if I do well, a spot in their company is pretty much guaranteed.

"_All it takes is a bit of planning. If you tack a few more hours onto your spring semester, you can take a summer off to head down there. They're paying well for your time," _my mother explains. The wheels start turning in my head. I technically could skip a summer semester if I took on a larger workload the following semester. It wouldn't be pretty, but I generally have enough free time in my week to accommodate a few more classes.

Also, getting paid is nice. With the amount that company generally pays, I might make enough to attend this year's anime convention here in Rainier city. It's been a long damn time since the last time I went, and I miss going terribly.

"I can do that. Tell them yes for me, all right?" I replied after a long pause.

"_Oh, they'll be pleased to hear that. I'm proud of the decision you're making." _ I can hear the happiness in my mother's voice when she responds. I smile a bit, feeling a little happy at the praise I'm being given. Of course, I'm way too proud to admit that.

"Yeah, that's nice. Can I go now?" I say in a tired voice. I can hear a chuckle from the other end of the phone.

"_Yes, go to class now, you insolent child," _comes her amused response. I mutter a quick goodbye and hang up, heaving a sigh. Amaryllis, who had been silent the whole time, is looking at me curiously.

"What was that all about?" she asks, tilting her head to one side. You know, if it had been anyone else who asked that question, I would have told them to shove it.

"So apparently I'm going to Chile during the summer for an internship with Internex Electronics," I reply in a rather blunt manner. Screw beating around the bush. Amaryllis looks a bit taken aback by the suddenness of my statement, but she quickly composes herself and gives me a cool nod in response.

"That's very impressive. You'll go far with Internex...though I hope you like eating meat," she remarks. Now that I think about it, she has a point.

"Goddammit, I'm missing my greek salads already." My complaint earns a chuckle from the redhead.

I look out at the science building, where my next class, computer science, is. It's a pretty big building, housing both the math and lab science classes. The building is divided into halves apportioned to each subject. From my point of view, the math portion of the building is on the left. That's my destination.

Amaryllis and I cross the street gingerly after watching for the crazy ass shuttle driver that enjoys speeding down this particular road, before slamming his brakes at the nearby stop. Yeah, I've been in that situation before. It wasn't fun. Bastard is an adrenaline junkie.

We reach the front of the building. To get inside, one had to climb a set of stairs and pass through double doors. Even though it's the middle of the day and the sidewalks are crammed with students, we have no trouble getting through. By that, I mean we pretty much shove everyone out of our way. Yeah, Amaryllis and I can be total pricks sometimes, but I have no qualms about giving back to the world what it's given to me.

"Well, I have to head up to class now," I say ruefully. I really do enjoy these walks with her, on the rare occasion she is free. Of course, I'd die a million times before admitting that to anyone, but this is my diary after all.

Amaryllis nods in understanding. She hesitates, and then takes a step towards me. I watch her come closer in confusion, and I almost cry out in shock as she gives me a hug, her slender arms wrapping around me. I awkwardly reciprocate, completely shocked. Out of all the people I've met, Amaryllis is the last person I'd expect to give out hugs. She's more likely to break your spine than she is to hug you. So how the hell do I respond to this? The only way I know how, of course.

"What's this? Sentiment, from Amaryllis? Don't be getting soft on me," I quip with a devilish grin. Amaryllis's immediate response is to shove me backwards violently, an exasperated look on her face.

"Oh, you asshole," she grunts, though I can tell she doesn't mean it by the amused gleam in her eyes.

"You know you love me."

"Go to class already so I can be rid of you." I watch Amaryllis walk away, my grin lessening into a warm smile.

"Text me if you get a free moment!" I call after her. Instead of a reply, she waves back at me without looking. Good enough, I guess.

Now that she's gone, my smile slips away, forming a thin line that betrayed no emotion; this was the face I wear on a daily basis.

I reach into the side pocket of my bag, withdrawing a set of Japanese imported headphones, produced by Audio Technica. They are made of a smooth wooden lacquer, and are about half the diameter of my palm. They are designed in such a way that the cord will loop around the back of your neck, so that the cups will hang down the front of my chest when I'm not using them.

Slipping them over my ears and plugging them into my phone, I play some of my favorite music, which is generally symphonic metal. Nightwish is a favorite of mine, so I put on one of their songs. As the music fills my head, I'm easily able to tune out the rest of the world. The only sensations passing through my ears are the sounds of piano and guitar mixing together in a glorious solution.

Pushing open the double doors, I walk into the building, shoving my way past the guy who had been trying to get out through the same door. The fucker. If you see me coming, get the hell out of my way, because I'm not budging for you.

My class is on the second floor, so I move through the crowded hallways and into the stairwell. The stairs here are made of metal and concrete, and are about the only finished product in here. There was nothing to hide the water pipes laying bare along the walls, nor anything to cover the multitudes of electrical wires that snake everywhere. You've got to love a school with a limited budget.

My feet click against the hard red floor for a few moments before I begin climbing the stairs to the next floor. Several other people pass me on their way up or down, but I completely ignore them, and they do the same. People could care less about you, especially in a college as large as this one.

After reaching the second floor, it only takes me a few moments to navigate the hallways to my class. I step inside and once again endure the curious looks sent my way by the other students. The professor isn't here yet, but that much is a given. I'm five minutes early, and he doesn't show up until at least five minutes late. I know right? God forbid he take this class as seriously as I do.

My usual seat is right between a guy and his girlfriend, and a dark skinned man whose name I don't care to remember. I'm not friends with any of them. The woman, who is the only female in this class, is a total slut, while the guy is a stereotypical dumb jock who rants about sports to his girl every damn day. Makes me want to shut him up with my fist. There's more to life than sports, you hick.

The guy next to me with the dark skin would have been a tolerable sort, if he didn't feel the need to comment on everything everyone said. I'm not joking. If anyone nearby says something, he'll answer, even if it wasn't addressing him. Even the professor gets sick of his shit sometimes. Bastard makes me want to shove a sock down his throat.

I look up and see the professor walk in, late as usual. Out of courtesy, I pause my music and take off my headphones, letting them hang down my chest. I also slide out my laptop from my bag, as I refuse to use the shitty computers that are included in every computer science classroom.

The professor soon begins his lecture, as we only practice the actual code itself on Mondays or at home. I suppose it is important to learn why some code works as it does, and not just how to use it.

Coding is HARD. So I'm forced to pay attention for most of this class. I find the challenge refreshing, though my enthusiasm is always dampened by this idiots surrounding me. I swear, the more that guy answers the professor's rhetorical questions, the more friendly my sock starts to look.

In the last twenty minutes of class, I get a text from my brother. Adam Rogers recently graduated from this same college with a degree in engineering, and now works in an electrical plant, earning a decent amount of money. I wouldn't say he and I were altogether that close, but I certainly didn't hate the guy. We bonded mostly over anime, when he came into my room one day to see me watching Soul Eater on the big screen. He apparently liked what he saw, as he demanded we watch the series over from the beginning.

Ever since then, we would always get together and watch different animes. Soul Eater, Bleach, Fairy Tail, Code Geass, and other notable titles; we watched them all, each of us losing ourselves in the fantasy, all while enjoying the other's company.

That being said, his text is about a new anime he's interested in watching. Apparently it is an older one we haven't seen yet.

**Get this, bro. Eureka Seven. Robots on hoverboards. We gotta do it! xD **

Huh. Never heard of it. I'll look it up later and give it a shot, despite how ridiculous Adam's description of it is. It can't be more ridiculous than the ending of Guren Lagann, after all. Though it was awesome, once you set your disbelief in a black hole somewhere.

When class ends, I replace my headphones and walk out of the room, ignoring the darker man as he calls out a goodbye to me. He does that every class. You'd think he'd have learned by now I hate his guts. That aside, I'm composing a reply to Adam. We made a promise never to watch anime unless we are together, so I'm trying to nail down a good time to drive back home to see him.

Of course, I'm so absorbed in my reply, that I just don't see the man standing at the bottom of the stairs. I wish with all of my heart that I had, because then I wouldn't be in the situation I am as I write this.

The man is holding something that pulses a gentle green glow in his hands, but as soon as the glow registers in my mind, I plow right into him. The green glow completely disappears as his hands press on my chest for a second as he falls completely on his back. I fall forward with a cry, thrusting out my forearm just in time to break my fall and absorb the impact, though it hurts like a bitch.

I leap to my feet, removing my headphones as I prepare to shout at this guy for being a dumbass and not getting out of my way. However, his utterly bizarre appearance takes me by surprise.

His skin was a dark grey color, seeming almost ashen in complexion. His possessed a square jaw and an imposing visage, a description I don't give out lightly. His face is framed by trimmed sideburns, but the rest of his long and wild black hair is held back by what looks like...a crown? I'm not even kidding. He's wearing this metal circlet that is adorned with a strange red gem on the front, and spikes on the sides. That's just his damn head. The rest of his clothing is tight fitting and looks almost like a military body suit, and it is colored with a black and grey pattern. He even seems to have what looks like metal gauntlets on each of his hands. Hell, when I see that his boots are metal too, I almost start to believe that this guy is wearing some kind of armor.

Let me just think about that. Um...what? Who the fuck wears clothes like that in a place like this? Does he think he's some kind of big shot? Or worse, is he one of those damned cosplayers that dare to run around assuming they can EVER resemble their favorite anime character?

The man gets up slowly, and suddenly his eyes shoot open and focus an intense glare on me. Holy shit his eyes are fucking red! I can't help but take a step back up the stairs, feeling slightly intimidated by that glare of what seemed to be pure hate.

The man growls, revealing sharpened white teeth, which only serves to freak me out more. Before I can blink, he's in front of me, and pain explodes in my chest as his gauntleted fist barrels into my ribs. I double over, gasping at the sudden agony. The man isn't finished. I can feel his hand on my shirt, and seconds late I'm hanging in the air by that one hand. What kind of strength does this guy have?!

With an enraged grunt, he tosses me into the foyer of the stairwell. At this point, I'm over my shock, and I'm ready to defend myself if I have to. I place my bag aside, along with my headphones. If this guy wants a fight, I'll definitely give him one.

A student walks out of the second floor hallway into the stairwell, but before he can get very far, he is transfixed by my assailant's glare. The student wisely nopes the fuck out of there. When he was gone, the man turned back to me, his expression turning furious.

"That spell was not meant for thee!" the man roars, his deep voice echoing menacingly throughout the stairwell. Wait what? Spell? What the fuck is he talking about? "How dare thou cross me?! Thou shalt pay dearly for this!"

"Look, don't get all pissy just because you didn't fucking move when I was coming down the stairs," I snapped back at him, clutching my ribs where he punched me. I can only hope nothing is broken. He punches hella hard.

The man doesn't look like he's listening. He's walking up the stairs, moving towards me. I raise my hands in preparation. I don't know anything about fighting really, apart from what I've seen in shows or anime, but I do know one thing. Blocking is good.

When the man reaches me, he lifts his hand over his opposite shoulder, almost as if he plans to...oh no you fucking don't.

His hands swings down at an incredible speed in an attempt to backhand me, but I saw it coming. I lift my forearm into prime blocking position, just as his hand reaches me.

By the nine circles of Hell and Lucifer's three fucking mouths, that HURTS! What the hell is his hand MADE of? Sledgehammers? At the very least, I think I managed to block, as the man is now looking at me with interest.

"That spell was not meant for thee," the man repeats calmly, though I can still hear the anger simmering in his voice. "But...perhaps 'tis not a total loss."

"Mind making some sense please? Who the fuck are you, and why are you _such an asshole?!_" I demand, but he ignores me, instead choosing to walk slowly around me in a circle, his hands clasped behind his back. Was he sizing me up? This is just weird. I think I should get as far away from him as possible. "Uh...what are you doing?"

"Quiet," the man commands me. I blink in surprise, but it only lasts for a second before I snarl at him angrily.

"Fucking...I swear to god, if you don't..."

"QUIET!" the man shouts, and I swear I can feel some kind of pressure around me, as if the air itself was shaking under the sound of his voice. That can't happen, right? No matter how weird it is, my bravado is starting to slip away in the presence of this strange man. I'm beginning to get a little scared.

Finally, the man seems to have seen enough. He gives me a satisfied smile, which just looks fucking creepy with those sharp teeth of his.

"Indeed. Thou will do just fine," he says at last, confusing me even further. He turns the other direction and descends the stairs with purpose in his stride. As he reaches the door to the first floor, that fear that I'm feeling trickles away.

"What the actual fuck?! You're just gonna walk away? Who the hell are you, and what do you mean, 'spell?!'" I scream at him in anger. The man doesn't stop, opening the door and disappearing from view. "Are you kidding me?!"

What the hell was all of that about? I don't even know what to think. I'd say he was just a crazy cosplayer, but I felt how strong he was. Hell, I can still feel my forearm aching from that one simple hit.

"Hey, are you all right?" I turn to see a student that had just entered the stairwell from the second floor. He probably heard me yelling and was wondering if I was crazy or something. I don't feel like explaining myself, so I shoot an angry glare at him.

"Fuck off," is the only response I give him. The edge in my voice is enough to stave him off. He gives me a look of disbelief and then leaves me behind, scoffing at my rudeness.

I can't bring myself to move. I'm still in shock from what just happened. "Okay...it was probably just a normal guy who was trying to stay in character," I rationalize to myself. "The grey skin was just makeup, and he had contacts for the eyes. Yes, that's it. His strength...no no that's not important. He probably works out, unlike me. A flashlight for the glow. Okay."

I'm rambling to myself at this point, trying to keep myself from freaking out. He's normal. He has to be. Everything in life has a rational explanation. I've seen people crazier than him. He's just really into his role. I let out a sigh of relief, accepting my explanation as the truth.

I fumble with my phone, dialing the number of the only person who I can trust to listen to me seriously. I hold the phone to my ear, gulping. The ringing echoes in my ear, and for a moment, I think she's not going to answer.

"_Hello? Seth, what's up? Usually you don't call," _Amaryllis's concerned voice echoes through the speakers, setting my worries to rest. I take a quick breath.

"I honestly have no idea what the fuck just happened," I admitted. "It's...goddamn I don't know what to think."

"_Okay. Just take a deep breath and start from the beginning, okay?" _Amaryllis replies calmly. She doesn't make a single smartass joke or remark of some kind, which I'm grateful for. She can tell by the tone of my voice that something is wrong, I guess. I do as she directed, breathing deeply until my heart rate slows down again.

I tell her everything I can about the strange man, including a physical description, as well as the way he spoke, the strange green glow, and how his strength seemed almost unreal. As I talk, I start feeling a little weird. There's this queasy feeling in my stomach, almost as if I had eaten something that didn't agree with me. I ignore it, already knowing that our school's food was shit.

"_I won't lie, this all sounds a bit fantastic, but I've known you long enough to know that you wouldn't make up bullshit like this," _Amaryllis finally says after I finish explaining my situation to her. I smile a bit, feeling happy that she believed me. "_I'm cutting class now. Can you meet me outside the science building?" _

"You bet I can. I'll be out in...whoa," I have to stop talking as the queasy feeling in my stomach gives way to nausea. My legs wobble a bit, and I have to use the wall to steady myself.

"_Seth? What's the matter?" _Amaryllis asked sharply. I'm starting to feel lightheaded. It's difficult to think straight, almost as if a fog is descending over my mind. My thoughts are muddled and indistinct.

"I...I feel really weird..." is the only thing I can say. I feel dizzy now, and I fall to the floor, unable to keep my feet. My phone falls from my hand and skitters across the floor.

"_Seth? Are you there? Seth? Shit...hang on, I'm coming!" _I can vaguely hear her saying over the phone as my senses dull. I should care a bit more about this situation, but I can't think. I can't even see that well, as my eyelids close and my consciousness fades.

I wake up slowly, and then immediately wish I hadn't. I groan miserably, feeling aches and pains all over my body. My pulse pounds in my head.

I'm really uncomfortable at the moment, which gets me thinking. What the hell was I doing last night, that I'm sleeping on a cold hard floor? "That's the last time I go out drinking with...wait a minute," I mutter to myself, but I stop as I remember exactly what happened last. I had been talking to Amaryllis in the stairwell.

"Agh...shit," I grunt, forcing myself into a sitting position so I can get a better look at my surroundings. Looking around, I realize that I'm still in the science building. How is that possible? Wouldn't someone have called the police if there's a student passed out in the stairwell of a school building?

The next thing I notice is how dark it is. It's so dim in this hallway. The only light comes from my phone, which is a few feet away from me. I must have been left here past closing time. It makes me angry that this school is so shitty that no one even cares that I was possibly hurt. Oh, there's a guy lying in the stairwell? LET'S COMPLETELY IGNORE HIM! Gah, humanity pisses me off so much.

I grab my phone. I need to call Amaryllis. She's probably worried as all hell about me, since I had been in the middle of a call with her when I passed out. Looking at the screen, I'm shocked to discover that there's no service. Why the hell is there no service? This stairwell is where I usually go to make calls in the building because I GET signal here. So what the fuck?

So my phone's useless. Just fucking great. Using the wall for support, I force myself to stand. Now that I'm not looking at my phone, my eyes slowly adjust to the darkness. What I see is so odd, that I don't know how to describe it.

There's...debris everywhere. Shards of metal, pieces of concrete, and a thin film of dirt cover the floor around me. Some of it was even sticking to my clothes, causing me to brush my shirt and pants with my hands to try and get some of it off.

The water pipes look old and rusted, and some of them are even missing. Hell, I think I even see one lying on the bottom of the stairs. The electrical wires are frayed and torn, though to my shock, none of them seem to be live. Speaking of which, I can't even hear the constant hum of the air conditioning. I don't know what to make of this. Did the building lose power? That theory doesn't explain the mess, though.

"What in the hell?" I whisper to myself. If I didn't know better, I'd say that this place had aged a few hundred years...but that would be ridiculous. Is this just some kind of ridiculous prank? "Fuck this, I'm not laughing. I'm going back to my dorm."

Guess there's nothing for me to do except walk back down the stairs. The moment my foot touches the first step, I hear a threatening creaking sound, the kind of sound you'd hear from rusty metal. I ignore it and keep walking, but I don't get very far when the creaking escalates and the entire fucking staircase gives out beneath me.

"HOLY SHIT!" I scream, feeling the metal and concrete stairs crumble away beneath me. Gravity takes hold and I fall down at least a two meter drop. Just before I hit the ground, I feel a tearing sound, and then a thin line of sheer agony shoots across my right side. "OW! Son of a...fuck!" I land right on my tail bone, which hurts like hell.

Looking at my side, I can see that my shirt is torn, and seems to be wet. I press my hand to my side, and then hiss in pain when I touch my skin. I pull my hand away and see blood. "Oh...that's not good. Shit." I look around to see what caused me to get hurt, and eventually I spy a rusted metal spike near where I fell. Some blood...my blood...was on its tip. "You confounded piece of...well, I'm sure glad I had my tetanus shot done recently." I curse at the spike. I'm really glad I had thought to get my shots. An injury like this would have spelled a very painful death otherwise.

I finish tearing off the strip of fabric that the spike had torn, and I wrap it around my side as a makeshift bandage. I tie it really tight in an attempt to stem the bloodflow. It still hurt, but it didn't look that deep. Of course, I can't really see that well.

One quick look tells me that the stairs had completely given way. I was lying in the remains of the steps. This was just ludicrous. Those stairs were concrete and metal. They don't just fucking break.

It's hard to stand, but I manage to do so, wincing at the pain in my side. Now that I'm down here, I can see these odd cylindrical objects littering the ground. I pick one up, examining it under the light of my phone.

I hurl the object away immediately in pure shock. That was a bullet casing! What in the...wait, that means the rest of these objects are bullet casings! What the hell HAPPENED while I was unconscious? I mean, I've heard of school shootouts, but...I didn't expect something like that could happen here. I can't make assumptions. I need to find out what really happened. The second I find someone, I'm going to make them tell me.

My side twinges painfully every time I take a step, so I limp to the door to the first floor hallway, only to find that the previously sturdy metal door was now rusted and dented. Also there's the fact that it has been ripped completely off of its hinges and was now lying in the middle of the hallway.

"What the shit?" I exclaimed in a higher pitch, starting to freak out. I still have no idea what's happening, but I do know I don't want any part of it. I just was to go home, call Amaryllis, and go curl up in a ball and eat ice cream.

I stepped over the broken door, looking in both directions. I can see that the entire building seems to be in the same state as the stairwell. There's debris everywhere, and I can even see power cords hanging from the ceiling, along with thicker cords that I can't quite make out. Curious I step towards one of them and run my hand along it. Hell, if I didn't know better, I'd say I was looking at roots. To like...a tree or something. But that can't be right. This building is four stories tall. There's no trees up there. This must be a thicker power cord, that's all.

If I keep walking this way, I can reach the exit to parking lot and Garlan Road, which loops around to my dorm. Now, I don't want to slip, so I keep my gaze fixed on the floor. I can see many more of those bullet casings. I can't help but shudder when I think of what might have happened to cause such an intense firefight in my school of all places. Fuck, I'm surprised I'm not having a mental breakdown yet.

Just have to open this door, and I'm free. I wrap my hands around the handle and push. Nothing happens. I push again. The door still doesn't budge. "Oh come on...open up you piece of...of..." I complain, but I trail off when I look to see what's blocking the door.

Staring back at me from the other side of the door is a solid wall of dirt and rock. I take a step back, completely speechless. Then another. My jaw falls open, and I start emitting unintelligible sounds, unable to form a coherent response.

"WHAT THE FUCK!?" I scream in a rather girly voice, and...oh...there's the breakdown. I'm now sitting with my back against the wall, my knees pressed up against my chest by my arms, and I'm rocking back and forth. Fuck. No. This can't be happening. How can I be underground? What the hell is going on? Why am I here? Where's Amaryllis? Goddamn it, where's my mother?!

I can't move. I won't move. If I stay here and sit completely still, maybe I'll wake up from this nightmare. I can't be underground. That's not possible. This building is on a higher elevation than the rest of campus. It can't be underground. Because if this is underground, then so is the rest of campus...AH GOD I can't think that way.

"I'm just going to take a deep breath, close my eyes...and when I open them, everything will be back to n...it's not normal," I say to myself, even going through the little eye closing thing...but nothing changed. "GODDAMMIT!"

I reach my hand over without lifting my head, and pinch myself hard on the arm. It hurts like crazy, but it didn't work. The school building still looks like it went through the apocalypse.

My side stings, and I realize I need to get some proper first aid. I shake myself out of my mental funk and stand back up. I'm NOT okay with this, but until I can get to safety, I can put the urge to curl up in a ball and cry in the back of my mind.

I need to go the other way. There's several exits. I just have to find them. There's one further down, but if this one is buried, then that one is likely buried too...ah fuck it I'm going to go check.

The hallway opens out into a larger room that serves to connect the math and science building. The walls are made of glass, but most of it is broken and scattered across the ground. Glass crunches underneath my feet as I slink into the room. I look to my left, through one of the broken glass walls. I remember there being a huge open study area beyond this wall. I can see the remains of it in the form of broken tables and rusty chairs. The hanging televisions are shattered or lying on the ground. There are a set of metal stairs in that area that head to the upper levels of the science wing, but they look corroded to me. No way am I going over there.

The stairs that lead to the lowest exit, where I first entered this building are hopefully made of sturdier material. I make sure to test my full weight on it first. Thankfully, nothing creaks or breaks, so I continue down the stairs.

"That's what I thought," I say to myself, observing that the doors down here are completely blocked off by dirt and rock. In fact, one of the doors is broken, and a huge heap of dirt had cascaded in through the gap. There was no way out down there.

Hm, maybe if I can find a computer that still had power, I could find out what in the hell happened. I think these places have backup generators. Especially for a building that had computer science classes in it. Where the hell would I find one though? They are usually in those little closet things that say electr...this is a dumb idea. I don't have the know how to find one of those, much less start it up.

So that's out. I need to think. What's the smartest thing to do in this situation? Wait! I have an idea. There are cameras in every stairwell. I know where the studio where the staff checks the cameras is. It's on the top floor. Now that I think about it, there's a roof access up there as well. I smile a bit at my idea. Now I can just head up top, check the cameras, and leave through the roof.

I move back towards the stairs to the second floor...only to remember that the stairs are out, and the foyer is too high for me to reach. I need to find another way up. There's no power, so the automatic doors leading into the science wing won't. That bars me off from the other staircases...not that I trust them.

"Fuck, is there any way up?" I curse softly, looking around. Then it hit me. There's an elevator in front of the building's buried front entrance. I might be able to use the maintenance ladder in the shaft to get up a floor or two, depending on where the elevator is.

After a swift run back down the stairs towards the exit, I'm at the elevator that is tucked in a corner between the staircase and the wall. It's usually meant for the handicapped, but this is my only way out.

The doors are shut, and there's no power, so I hook my fingers in the tiny gap between them and pull. It barely budges. Dammit. I have to do this the hard way, don't I? I adjust my stance to give myself as much leverage as possible, and then I try again, this time using as much strength as I can muster.

"Come on..." I grit out between clenched teeth. The doors opened very slowly, giving me a lot of resistance. I grunt in exertion, sweat beading on my brow. Once the gap is large enough, I push myself in there and use my newfound leverage to shove the doors open the rest of the way. I find myself looking at the inside of the elevator car.

"Oh, you've got to be fucking kidding me!"

* * *

Here's my first attempt at writing a story in this genre. I am well aware of the stigma of HiE stories, and I and determined to break free of it and spin a tale that will be worth reading.

With that in mind, I am a bit of a masochist when it comes to constructive criticism, so if there's anything in here that needs fixing, tell me. This is a very early rough draft, and will more than likely be rewritten many times.

Next, I am one of those authors that likes to play music in the background that suits each situation. I have included links to the songs I listened to while writing this story, if you care to use them.

I will post more chapters as I have time, or as long as inspiration holds out.

Thanks for your time, everypony!


	2. The End of Humanity

This makes things harder, that's for sure. Now I have to find a way past this elevator if I ever want to get out of here. I make a quick check of my mental map of the building to see if there are any other accessible elevators. When my search comes up fruitless, I step into the elevator.

"Hm, in emergency situations, there's always a way out of the elevator, like a hatch or something. Let's see if I can find one." I find that thinking aloud helps a great deal, as it keeps me from thinking about how fucking insane this entire situation really is.

I cast my gaze around the interior of the elevator, and sure enough, I find a hatch in the roof of the car. Grinning, I grasp the handle and yank downwards...only for me to realize that it's locked. "Come on, can I get a break here?!" I snap at the hatch. Unfortunately, the hatch doesn't feel like explaining itself.

It seems to be held shut by a simple deadbolt. I whip out a lock pick and...pah, I wish. That would be dumb. Nobody knows how to use a lockpick in college, especially not a nerd like me. Dammit, why can't I be like one of those characters in stories that are perfect at everything?

I hold both hands over my head and slam them into the hatch, hoping to force it open. Seeing how rusted everything is, I'm thinking that the deadbolt may be in a similar state of disrepair.

The hatch resists the first hit, though I can heard creaking and snapping. I hit it again, and get a similar result. Two more hits and the deadbolt snaps, allowing the hatch to open outwards. Finally, some good fortune at last. Now let's get out of here.

I reach up and grab the edge of the square hole. Now it's just a matter of pulling myself up. I strain my muscles as hard as I can, but it really hurts. Damn, how does that Tomb Raider chick make it look so easy?! Ignoring the pain, I hoist myself into the elevator shaft. I almost fall down when I realize that the elevator car is not stable. I can hear a creaking sound again, and my blood runs cold when I see that the cables holding up the car are practically rusted through.

I hurl myself at the ladder on the wall of the shaft just as the cables snap with a horrendous screech and the elevator plummets into the basement level of the building. I grab desperately at the rungs of the ladder, but the first one I touch breaks under my weight and I fall several feet before I grab a lower, more stable rung.

Finally in a stable position, I remain as still as possible as I wait for my heart to stop beating at my rib cage. I feel like I'm about to hyperventilate. Then, I wince as I hear the sound of the elevator crashing into the lower floors.

"Son of a bitch, that was close," I pant. My voice echoes into the blackness of the elevator shaft, twisting it in a strange manner. Well, I'm not going to talk until I get out of the shaft. That was fucking creepy.

Okay, let's get moving. One rung after the other. One rung after the other. I've got a long way to go before I reach the top floor. When I reach the gap in the ladder created by my desperate fall, I end up having to balance on the unbroken rungs with only my feet, while one hand reaches for the next intact rung. Praying that it will hold, I latch onto that one rung and pull myself up, ignoring the pain. I can hear the concrete cracking, so with one very painful burst of strength, I launch myself up to the next stable rung. Just in time too, because that rung I was yanking on just fell out of the wall. Goddammit, I wish I knew more about what happened to this place.

The next few minutes seem to blur together. It feels like every part of my body hurts. I can't keep myself from grunting in exertion every time I change rungs. I hate ladders. When I get out of here, I will light every single ladder in existence on fire.

On my way up, I pass two more doors that lead out into the second and third floor, respectively. They're both closed, which means I'm going to have to find a way to open the one up top without falling to my death.

When I reach the fourth floor, I edge my way onto the tiny ass ledge in front of the door, glad to be off of that infernal ladder. I take a moment catch my breath. My arms are burning like crazy, making me regret being too lazy to hit the gym.

There's barely enough room to stand on this thing. Oh god...one wrong move, and I'm dead. When I look at the door, I'm suddenly happy. The door is ajar already, but not by much. It's enough for me to slip through into the fourth floor.

If I remember correctly, the security room is at the end of this hall. I'm not under any illusions that the consoles will even work, but I feel like there should be some form of backup power, especially for security footage.

Honestly, I just want to see what happened between me and that man from a different perspective. Maybe that'll help me get a sense of how I ended up in this situation. So it doesn't matter how slim the chance is.

I don't get much further down the hallway before I am stopped cold. On the ground, with its spine braced against the wall, is a human skeleton.

"What the fuck?!" I scream, getting as far away from it as possible. "What in the hell happened when I was out? How did he die? HOW LONG WAS I OUT THAT HIS FLESH HAD ENOUGH TIME TO ROT AWAY?!"

I'm starting to get a terrible inkling of what may have happened, but there's no way I'm going to acknowledge it. Whoever that was is dead now. That skeleton won't hurt me...but it's creepy as fuck. I'm getting scared. I know this place is dangerous because of how everything is in terrible condition, but is there something else out there? Something dangerous enough to warrant shooting at it all these bullets whose casings I see everywhere?

I can't think that way, or I'm going to go insane. I move past the skeleton. As I do, I notice that it's holding a rifle. Holy hell, if that thing still works, that'll do wonders for making me feel at ease.

The skeleton's hands are clenched around the handle of the rifle. I cringe as I try to take the gun from it. I'm trying not to touch those bones...I've never touched a dead body, and I'm not about to start. I shut my eyes and tug on the gun. I hear a sickening crack, and the gun comes free. I open my eyes again to see that I had torn its finger bones off, and they were now scattered on the floor.

I have no fucking idea how to use this thing. I know you point and shoot, but I don't know anything about how to hold it to keep from getting hurt. Where's the safety on this thing? There it is. It's on the side. I'll leave it on.

Turning the gun over gives me no clues on what kind it is, nor if there's even any ammo in it. I'll use it when the time comes, but if worst comes to worst, it'll make a good club.

The door to the security room is...on the ground, shattered to pieces, the wood now rotting. On the larger pieces, I could see...are those claw marks? I can't help it. I start hyperventilating. I can't seem to get enough air, causing me to fall against the doorway.

I need to get out of here. I'm going to do what I came to do, and then I'm getting the absolute fuck out of dodge.

In the security room, the computer consoles are arrayed against the opposite wall, with several damaged monitors covered almost the rest of the wall's surface area. There are cords running everywhere, and I even think...oh hell yes. There's a separate generator in this room. Damn, I love life sometimes. Only sometimes though. I'd love it more if I was back outside.

A single punch of the power button later, and the generator in the room sputters to life. Some of the screens power on, though a lot of them are corrupted with static or broken screens.

To my surprise, there's no login screen. It immediately takes me to a screen where I can access the security footage. That's odd. If I were in charge, there would be password locks all over this. What sort of crisis could cause the administration of this school to bypass all security protocols?

Well, whatever the case, I can access the footage I need. However, as my eyes scroll to the first video, I start. What? The last date of recorded footage was on February 12th, 2083?! That has to be a typo, or a miscalculation. Putting that aside, I begin to scroll down, but then I note a file marked by an exclamation mark.

**02/27/2014 Southern Stairwell: Math Wing: Concerning Subject Alpha**

The 27th? That's today's date. Or at least that's the date my phone is telling me. Who or what is Subject Alpha? That sounds less like school administration and more along the lines of...military. Of course. For some reason, the military entered this building while I was unconscious. That explains why I found a damn rifle on a dead body. The staff didn't have that kind of weaponry, nor did they need it.

I hesitantly click on the file, and the video starts to play. An image of the stairwell that I had fallen unconscious in appeared, in the later part of the school day. I can see all of the different students walking to class. Then, I see myself walking through the bottom stairs, on my way to computer science. Wow, that's weird. No matter how many times you see it, you never get used to seeing yourself on camera.

But this means that I'm an hour behind what I want to see. I fast forward until the time when my class ends is displayed. Now, it was about the time where the students were already home, as there aren't that many that take late classes.

Finally, I see the man who had hit me walked into the bottom of the stairwell. I watch him carefully, hoping to see something that would help me understand all of this.

Strangely, the moment he walks on screen, a label appears above his head. It read "Sombra." Is that his name? It's definitely not a word I've heard of before, so I guess that's a safe assumption. At least I can call him something other than "the man."

Sombra raises his hands in the video, and a strange green orb appeared between them, steadily growing in size until it was about the size of a soccer ball. My eyes bug out. He just created something from nothing. What sorcery is this?! Despite how impossible this seems, that explains the strange green glow I saw.

Then, I see myself walk out from the top floor, listening to my music like an idiot. Then, to my shock, a label appears above me as well. This one read, "Subject Alpha." So I'm Subject Alpha? I'm so confused. I feel there is something huge going on behind the scenes that I just can't see. What is the connection between Sombra, me, and the state of this place?

My past self collides with Sombra just as I remember, but this time I see that same green orb go right into my chest, disappearing into my body. I instinctively look down at my chest, but there's nothing to indicate a change of any kind. So what that green orb the "spell" Sombra had been going on about? But...that would hint that he had been using magic. That's not possible. Magic...isn't a thing. Trust me. If it is as easy as believing in magic to use it, then every kid should have been able to do it. Magic is just the brainchild of creative authors, not something...that could have put me out for hours on end. I don't want to think about this. I don't want to admit that my preconceptions of this world could be wrong. Hell, it won't just be my preconceptions, but those of every single scientist in the world!

The video continues on, and I again watch Sombra fucking manhandle me like I'm nothing, and then doing his creepy stalker shit where he circles me and starts talking in early modern english. But I don't care about that. When it gets to the point where I've fallen unconscious, I start watching carefully.

I watch with disbelieving eyes as my unconscious body rises into the air, my limbs flopping around like a ragdoll. That same green glow is emanating from my chest like a damn spotlight. Then, the green orb that was in my chest suddenly expands to encompass my body entirely, and then orb, me, and everything within a short radius of me completely winked out of existence.

The video ends there, but my shock doesn't. "What in the world did I just see? Sombra...what did you do to me?" I whispered, my voice shaking.

I have to see more. I click on the latest video; this is the one that was mistakenly dated almost eighty years in the future. When this one plays, it's actually a recording of this very room.

"This is the final report of Captain Maka Rogers, dated February 12th, 2083. The Oppressed have broken into the building and are demolishing our defenses. Our escape routes have been cut off; it's only a matter of time before they get here," the woman in the video says urgently, though the audio is scratchy.

Wait a minute, Rogers? Come to think of it, she looks a lot like my brother...but how is that possible? 2083?! You mean that wasn't a typo? THAT SOMBRA BASTARD ZAPPED ME INTO THE FUTURE?!

Behind Maka, I can see other heavily armed soldiers running to and fro. I can even hear the sounds of gunfire in the distance. What in the hell was going on? What were the Oppressed?

"Our struggle has ended. This recording is a means of saving information for the next civilization to discover. The one who has defeated the human race calls himself King Sombra, and not only possesses untold power of an unknown nature, but also the ability to twist and contort human flesh into grotesque quadruped forms that we call the Oppressed," Maka continues. Before she can keep talking, a soldier runs up to her.

"Captain! They have broken past the third floor barricade and are heading this direction!" the soldier shouted over the gunfire. Maka looked grim.

"How much time do we have?" she demanded.

"Three minutes, at the most," the soldier admitted. For some reason, Maka smiled, placing a hand on the soldier's shoulder.

"Private Grant, it has been an honor working with you. It has been an honor working with all of you," she calls to the other soldiers. In response, the other soldiers voice similar reactions or solute. "My last order to you...is die with honor, and join our families in the heavens."

Maka turns back to the consoles as the soldiers cheer. I can see one of the soldiers shutting the door to the security room, deadbolting it shut. Seconds later, something hits the other side, and the door splinters.

"To whoever hears this, I have one last piece of advice for you. Sombra has already returned to the future, but his goal is clear. You MUST not let him find Subject Alpha...my uncle. If he does...then..." Maka says, but before she can finish explaining, the door is completely annihilated, and then a veritable wave of twisted, grotesque..._things_ swarm through the door like the tide, slashing and biting everything in their way with long, sharp claws and vicious, slobbering teeth.

I clap a hand to my mouth in horror, trying not to cry out as I watch the soldiers die en masse. The soldiers can't do anything. They can't even manage to fire their guns more than once or twice before they are torn apart by what equates to quadruped zombies.

Maka manages to deal some serious damage with a grenade, but she can't stop their immense numbers. I can only watch as one of the Oppressed grabs her by the throat with one of its...hands? Claws? Paws? Hooves? Fuckin...whatever. But right before it tears her to pieces, she lifts up a detonator and presses the button.

I have to look away, tears running down my face. I hear the explosion, but I don't want to look at those things tearing that brave woman apart.

The video ends there...and so does my mental strength. I collapse into a sitting position against the wall, even as the computer shuts itself off as the generator uses the last of its fuel. So much new information has been handed to me. So many thoughts run through my head, I can hardly sort through them even as I write this. I'll attempt to summarize them, though.

I have to sort through all this. Whether or not I believe it is besides the point. That man who used his sorcery or whatever on me...his name is King Sombra, and he apparently came from the future and exterminated the human race. For some reason, I'm really important to him, which makes sense considering how angry he was when I absorbed that...whatever it was.

That's not even the worst part...I'm in the future too. By at least eighty years. Which means...that everyone I know and love is probably...oh fuck, if I accept that as true, they are already dead because of Sombra...which means...

I fall onto my knees, tearing at my hair. I can't help but sob into my hands. My mother is dead. I'll never have another argument with her again. My brother is dead. I'll never watch anime with him again. Amaryllis...is dead. I slam my fist against the ground, not even caring when bits of debris stab into my skin and draw blood. Amaryllis is dead. I will never...I will never love again. This isn't fair. In what seemed to be less than a few minutes, I've lost my entire life. Everyone I've ever cared about is gone. The niece that I didn't even know I had is dead, torn apart right in front of me.

Fuck, I'm not even out of college. I'm not strong enough to deal with all of this. No one should have to deal with the death of their entire race.

"God...goddammit...why?!" I scream at the ceiling. When I think about it...my niece...she was named Maka. My brother...Adam...he named his daughter after the main character of Soul Eater: the first anime we had ever watched together. This fact just makes me cry even harder. I don't know which is worse, knowing that someone would never love me, or that someone did, and I put them through the same pain that I'm feeling now.

Adam...I'm so sorry. I wish I had told you how much you meant to me. Only now do I see just how much I meant to you.

Maka...I wish I had been given the chance to love you the way you deserved. That was no world to raise a child in.

Mother...I wish I had told you I loved you on the phone earlier. She's dead, and the last conversation I had with her was me being an ass, as always.

Amaryllis...why had I been such a cynical asshole? Why couldn't I just grow a pair and tell you how I felt about you? You were my only real friend...the only one who understood me. Hell, you knew me better than I knew myself. Why couldn't I have just told you? You deserved to know...you didn't deserve this fate I left the world with.

"THIS ISN'T FAIR!" I yelled as loud as I could, until my voice gave out. I stood up slowly, the anger roiling inside of me like a hurricane. I grabbed a table nearby and threw it at the now useless computer monitors, shattering them. I stormed around the room, destroying anything I could find.

When there was nothing left to destroy...I stood in the last bastion of mankind. I was the last one of our kind. The last human. Why am I the one who gets to live, when everyone else is dead?

One thought was present in my head as I turned my empty eyes to the doorway.

"I'm going to fucking **MURDER **that Sombra," I growled, my voice coming out hoarse from all the screaming.

As I move towards the door, I hear something. It almost sounded like a horse was walking down the hallway, only instead of clopping, its hooves were making a strange _click-sccraaape. _I freeze, knowing exactly what it was that was outside that room. That rhythm...it had four legs. That clicking and scraping...it has claws. It makes sense that there'd be one left.

"So...the Oppressed have come for me, huh?" I said in an oddly calm voice. I hefted the rifle, clicking off the safety. There's only one way to find out if this thing still works.

I turn the corner and charge down the hallway towards one of the creatures responsible for the death of mankind, not caring at all that I could get myself killed. Everyone I knew and loved is dead. Why the fuck should I care that I could die too?

The creature I'm running towards is a complete mockery of mankind. It's as if someone had completely ripped the skin off of a human being, and then haphazardly wrapped it around the wire frame of a small horse, like a pony. It looks nothing like a horse. It is an abomination.

What is worse is that I can tell who the Oppressed used to be. That blonde hair. Those empty green eyes. I'm looking at what's left of Maka. My rage peaks.

"I'LL KILL YOU!" I yell at the creature, getting its attention. It snarls and moves to attack me, but I'm already there. The butt of my gun slams into the side of its head. The Oppressed is knocked to the side, as I had put all my strength into that hit.

I'm not done. I leap at the creature and bash down on its head with enough strength to break through the skin, drawing blood. I don't stop. I continuously bash down on it over and over, ignoring the agonized screeching it was making.

Suddenly, the creature slams the back of one of its limbs into my stomach, winding me and pushing me back into the wall. My back collides with the wall painfully. The Oppressed is on me like a whirlwind, its claws whipping through the air. I yelp and duck under its claws, which cut into the wooden wall like it wasn't even there.

I ram my shoulder into its chest, putting all of my body weight into the attack. I knock the creature back, but its claws rake along my shoulders, tearing my shirt and drawing blood.

When the creature tried to rise, I ran at it. I kicked it viciously, and then rammed the barrel of my rifle into the creature's gaping mouth. I pulled the trigger with a roar. The ancient gun roared to life, deafening me, but it was still one of the most glorious sounds in the world, topped only by the agonized screaming of the Oppressed as the bullets shot through the soft inner lining of its throat, into its brain, and out the other side, painting the wall with its blackened blood.

I keep firing until the gun runs out of ammo, and then I step back, watching the remains of my niece breathe its last. "If I can never love you like you deserve to be loved...freeing your soul from...this...is the least I can do for you. Rest in piece, Maka Rogers." I utter reverently in a wavering voice. The tears come once more, but I don't break down like before. I let the liquid drip down my cheeks as I walk down the hallway towards the stairwell.

The roof access is just inside the stairwell, consisting of a crimson ladder that led to a hatch that was designed so that it could be easily opened. I climb the ladder, noting with some satisfaction that the rungs were still sturdy. I reached the hatch and untightened the wheel keeping it shut.

The moment the hatch was free, it slammed open without me touching it again. A fucking torrent of dirt cascades over me, knocking me off the ladder and to the ground. "Fuck!" I yell out as several pounds of dirt cover my body.

Once the stream of dirt dissipates, I force myself to stand up, letting the earth slide off of me. Now, what with the blood and tears, I'm a total mess. My clothes and skin are covered in dirt. Now I need to find some water to clean my wounds, or they are going to get infected.

Looking back up at the hatch, I sigh and get moving again. I climb through the hatch and find that I'm in a very narrow tunnel of dirt that leads up...to the night sky. Oh praise the whatever...I'm outside again!

I lever myself out of the hole and onto the ground once more. I breathe in a good lungful of that fresh air...and then promptly bend over and have a coughing fit because dirt got in my throat.

A quick look around the area lets me know that I'm in a forest. This isn't that surprising, considering the tree roots poking through the entire building. No, this is good. In a forest, I can find food from small animals, and water from creeks and rainfall. If I'm the last human, then there's nowhere for me to go. Everyone's dead. There's no civilization.

Just great. I'm motherfucking Robinson Crusoe in a post apocalyptic setting. Or I could just die of exposure. Or an animal could kill me. Fuck, I don't know what I want. Should I keep living? Or do I just lay down and die, and hope that I can join my family and friends up in the afterlife?

I can't make that kind of decision just yet. I pick a random direction and start walking. The makeshift bandage that I've been using is now completely soaked through with blood. I don't have anything to patch it up with. I guess I'll be dying of blood loss in the near future. Well, until then, I might as well keep exploring.

This forest is one messed up place. The plants are all twisted around the trees like parasites, and the trees themselves are warped and gnarled. What is this place, the fucking Korcari Wilds?

I can hear the animals skittering around the underbrush, but none of them are stupid enough to walk into view. That's fine. I'm gonna die anyway. Might as well make it happen sooner rather than later.

I don't get much farther before I hear a rustling from a nearby bush. I turn my head, and the first thing I see are two glowing green eyes. "That...can't be good," I said haltingly, taking a step back.

A growl not unlike that of an angry dog emanates from the bush, and then the weirdest fucking creature stalks out. It's a wolf. But not just any normal wolf. This thing is made out of wood! It literally looks like a wooden wire frame of a wolf! How the hell is it moving? How is it alive? Where are the vocal cords needed to make those growls?

Science aside...those teeth look really sharp. And I think it wants to have me for dinner. How it'll digest me without a stomach, however, is besides the point. The point...I would rather not have anywhere near me. "I don't surprise you're friendly?" I ask it hopefully.

The moment I finish talking, the wolf leaps at me with a snarl. Its front claws slice down on my chest, even as it knocks me clear off of my feet. Once again, I find myself landing on my back.

Right as the wolf is lunging to bite down on my face, I bring up my rifle and jam it into its open jaws. It's crazy strong for such a thing wolf, so I have to use both hands to hold those snapping jaws away from my throat. Since both hands are occupied, its front claws are tearing at my arms, causing me to cry out in pain.

I bring my knee up into the wolf's middle, and I hear something snap. The wolf backs off, yelping in pain.

So what does a man do when he's bleeding heavily and has only an empty rifle for a weapon? He runs the fuck away. So that's what I do. I turn the other direction and just fucking book it.

"Shit shit shit shit shit!" I curse even as I run. "This day just gets worse and worse..."

That's the understatement of the century. I'm sprinting through the undergrowth now, knocking thin boughs and thickets out of my way as I blindly try and put as much distance between me and that goddamn wolf. What do you even call a wolf made of wood? A timberwolf?

I chance a look behind me. What I see spurs me on to ignore the pain in my everywhere, and put on a burst of speed. Behind me, not only is that one wolf really trying to catch up to me, it also brought friends. Yeah. An entire pack of fucking timberwolves is chasing me. Why is it that everything I've met since waking up wants TO FUCKING KILL ME?!

A leafy bough that I pushed out of my way swipes back in my direction, cutting into my cheek and leaving behind a stinging gash. "Ouch, goddammit," I hissed in agony. Looking ahead, I spot a light blaring from the darkness. I don't care what it is. I change my course to head straight for it. I can hear the damn timberwolves catching up to me. I don't have much time before they overtake me and rip me to shreds.

The source of the light reveals itself as a window carved into the side of a large tree. There's even a door set into it, with a menacing looking mask pinned to the trunk above it. Fucking...I don't even stop to think about it. I hurl open the door and slam it shut behind me. The wolves slam into it seconds later, barking and whining in frustration.

"SUCK IT! I'M NOT DYING TODAY!" I shout back at them, even though I doubt they can understand me. I let out a crazed laugh, reveling in my newfound safety. "I must be going crazy."

"Well, now, this is quite the surprise. What manner of being presents itself before my eyes?" I hear a deep, female voice say. If I didn't know better, I'd say that her voice had hints of African American descent in it.

I raise my eyes to see the strangest creature. If I had to guess I'd say I was looking at a zebra, but it seemed too small. Its blue eyes were also larger than they should be, and let's not even count the rings and earrings decorating its body, almost as if it had personalized its appearance.

"I know you are able to speak. Use your voice now, don't be meek." My jaw drops as I see the zebra moving its lips. That fucker is talking to me.

"Yup...I'm definitely going crazy."

* * *

I had a bit of trouble writing this one, so I certainly expect some criticism. I'm not that good at emotional breakdowns, but I think I managed to get down the structure of what he was thinking/feeling at that moment. I can just build from here.

Indeed, and now King Sombra and Zecora make their appearance, which means we are finally in the world we know and love.

I'll have the next chapter out soon.


	3. Gateway to Equestria

Over an indeterminate period, I drift in and out of unconsciousness. It feels wonderful. After all the shit I just went through, I really needed a sleep like this.

Finally, my eyes open, and full awareness returns to me. Unfortunately, the first sensations I feel are dull pains all over my body. I have this killer headache, and my side stings like a motherfucker. When I try to move my arms, I wince. Well, I guess it wasn't just my side. Oh right, my arms and shoulders were sliced to ribbons by that damn timberwolf.

Oh shit that reminds me. Where the hell am I? I remember running into a structure of some kind built into a tree, but that's about it. I was under the impression that there wasn't any civilization left, thanks to that Sombra bastard. So whose house was I in?

I take a quick look at myself. To my surprise, all of my wounds have been bandaged tightly and treated with...are those herbs? My injuries don't hurt as much as they did before, so I assume I've been treated by a medical professional. Oh, that would be glorious if there was a doctor left alive.

Then, I realize with a start that I'm completely naked. Also, all of that dirt that had been stuck to my skin has been mostly cleaned. Someone's been taking good care of me, and I'm getting incredibly curious about who I'm dealing with.

I take a look around in an attempt to find out more about this place I'm staying in. I'm resting in a modern bed with white sheets and a yellow comforter, and I can feel fluffy pillows under my head. This bed is placed in a wooden alcove that surrounds me on three sides, and all I can see from here is a wooden wall. On this wall, a few shelves are installed, on which several multicolored bottles are stored. They are labeled in a language I can't understand.

Pain shoots through my body when I attempt to sit up. "Ah, shit!" I curse rather loudly, and I give up the attempt. I guess it's too early in my treatment for me to move. Well, I guess this won't be a problem. I could just use my laptop and r...oh wait. I left my goddamn bag in the school, and there's no way I'm going back there. Not in a million years. Even with the laptop, there's likely no internet, seeing as every human except for me and my unknown benefactor is dead. Also, no electricity, so once my phone dies...it's gone for good. Well, this just plain sucks.

"Is that your voice that I hear? For your health, I was beginning to fear." I freeze as I hear that African-esque voice again. So I hadn't been dreaming that part. I guess I get to meet this mysterious doctor that probably saved my life, for better or worse.

"Yep, I'm awake and shit," I reply bluntly, not even caring to temper my language. Everyone's dead; there's no point in censoring myself.

In response, I hear the sound of clopping hooves. I tense up immediately, and then relax when I don't hear that click-scraping that the Oppressed make. If it had been an Oppressed in here, I would already be dead.

That same zebra from before canters into view. Huh. So I wasn't dreaming that part either. Still, for a zebra, it looks really weird. Are those eyes normal? And what's with the get-up? Then the zebra fucking smiles at me. How the fuck...animals don't smile. What...I don't even. At this point, I don't know what's worse. The fact that a zebra can smile, or that it is actually somewhat reassuring.

"That is quite a relief. Your death would have brought me much grief." My jaw drops as the zebra fucking talks to me. No, there's no ventriloquist bullshit going on. I can physically see its lips moving in time with the words.

"Holy shit, it talks!?" I can't help but scream. The zebra actually chuckles at my response. Zebras laughing like humans. Now I've seen everything.

"Indeed, I am able to speak. My name is Zecora, if that is what you seek." The zebra confirmed my suspicions. This is the weirdest shit. Also...is it rhyming? That's the third time in a row it-well I should probably call it "she," now- has rhymed.

"Okay, not the weirdest thing I've seen recently, but pretty up there," I rationalize, half to myself and half to Zecora. I can't believe I'm talking to a fucking zebra that can talk back. Why have no humans discovered an animal like this? Or maybe, Zecora feels safe to live on the surface now that the humans are dead. Wow, that was a dark thought. Anyhow, I should probably introduce myself too. I'm an asshole, but I can at least show basic courtesy. "My name is Seth Rogers. I can't say it's a pleasure, considering," I say, looking down at how injured I am. Zecora nods in understanding.

"Your injuries were very severe, though how you obtained them is not yet clear," she replies. Okay, now I know something's up. That's the fourth time she's rhymed. It's starting to get annoying. Not to mention confusing. Might as well bite the bullet and ask.

"So what's up with the rhyming?" I ask bluntly. Surprisingly, I don't see any sign of irritation on her part at my sudden change of subject. Instead, she chuckles a bit.

"My rhymes are the source of a small blue blossom. The effects of which, I've come to find quite awesome," Zecora explained. Oh come on! Blossom and awesome? That's just stretching it...but it's also kind of impressive. Not that I'll ever tell her that.

"Wait, so a blue flower caused you to rhyme all the time?" Oh great, now I'm rhyming too. Oh well, at least I've got good timing...wait...goddammit I did it again. "How is that even possible?"

"It is difficult to understand magic's effects. It is a much deeper subject than one suspects," Zecora answers. I give her a deadpan stare. I asked her a question, and she literally responded with "magic." Seriously? I'm still having difficulties believing that magic is real, despite the evidence I've been given. Well, I suppose that's not exactly true. I'm just not ready to accept everything I hear at face value.

"Right...so...I guess you want to know what I am. I'm assuming you've never seen any thing like me," I continue on awkwardly, hoping to change the subject. When I see Zecora nod, I add, "Tell you what. If you answer my questions, then I'll answer yours."

Seconds later, my stomach gives off a growl, telling me that I hadn't had any food since yesterday after noon. "But before that, think I could get some food?" I inquire hopefully. Zecora breaks out into a smile and trots out of sight.

So, I've gone from meeting a demon equivalent of Hitler to playing twenty questions with a talking zebra. Life's funny that way.

A few moments later, Zecora returns with two steaming bowls of some kind of soup. I can't go into eating this holding any preconceptions of food. I have no idea what she puts in her soup, but I'm hungry enough not to care.

Wait a minute, how the fuck is she holding those...is she balancing those bowls on her hooves? And walking on her hind legs? What is up with this zebra?

I thankfully take the soup off of her hoof when she offers it to me. I look around for a spoon, and then I realize that I'm not going to get one. Zecora has hooves. You can't hold a spoon with hooves. Though I find it odd how the hell zebras evolved to have vocal cords and intelligent brains over only eighty years in the first place.

Lifting the bowl to my mouth, I let some of the amber liquid seep into my mouth. My eyes widen at the taste. Wow, that's really good. The most prominent taste is honey, but I can also detect mushrooms in there, along with some kind of spice. If I didn't know better, I'd say it was basil. "Not bad," I commented. Zecora smiles with satisfaction, and then watches me expectantly. "All right. I might as well start. I'm human. Homo Sapiens if you want to get technical. Stand on two legs, omnivorous, and mostly intelligent."

"In ancient legends and ruins, ponykind has heard of your name. Among historians, your species has garnered much fame," Zecora responded with awe in her voice. She then gazed at me in a new way, as learning this new tidbit about me was enough to earn her full attention.

That aside. Hold on a minute. Did she just say that humans were a thing of legend? There are ruins of us lying around? I can honestly say I feel like the damn Romans. Then another thought occurs to me. I thought I had only been out for eighty years. If there was enough time for all the achievements of the human race to become ruins, then how much time really passed? And wait..._ponykind? _Is she trying to suggest that there's a civilization of ponies running around? That has to be the most dumbest thing I've ever heard. It sounds like something out of a damn cartoon.

I have all of these questions, but I can only ask one before it's Zecora's turn again. "Well then, I didn't expect to hear that. Now...what in the nine hells _are _you?" I demanded. In hindsight, that was probably a dumb question to ask, but I have to know for sure.

"I am of the zebra variety. I hope that this answer, ceases your anxiety," Zecora answered with a smile. Holy shit, she managed to make a rhyme with variety. This chick is serious.

"You can't be a zebra," I told her flatly. Zecora looks back at me, dumbfounded. "I know what a zebra is, and they don't talk."

"Then prepare yourself for a disappointment. My words appear to belie your statement," she returned with a look of amusement on her face. Oh would you look at that. The zebra can make facial expressions. I don't know how I feel about this. You know what, fuck it. It's much easier to refer to her as a zebra than "an as yet unknown species of intelligent animal that happens to look like a zebra."

"Fair enough, I guess. Your turn Zecora," I concede, not willing to argue the point. While she thinks up her next question, I greedily gulp down some of the soup...and then immediately regret it because it's still hot.

"As far as I've heard, your kind is naught but sand. Would you care to tell me how you came to this land?" Zecora questions, and then she sips at her soup. You know, doing the smart thing instead of pouring a super hot liquid down your throat. Also, "sand?" Don't you mean...dust? Oh, but of course, dust doesn't rhyme with land.

"Honestly, I know very little about how I came here. I guess the only way I can explain it is the same way you explain your rhymes. Fucking magic," I remarked. It's only a half truth, at best, but I just met this zebra. There's no way I'm going to trust her with everything I've gone through. No, I'll get through this on my own. I'll use Zecora to get some information and to get patched up, and then I'm out of here. I have no idea where I'd go, but I need to find some clue as to where Sombra is. I still need to shove a brick up his asshole.

"To not know one's origins is an unfortunate woe. I, for one, recall a unicorn who would have liked to know," Zecora says in a sympathetic tone. Yeah, that's great and all, but...hang on, did she say unicorn? Okay, scratch what I said earlier about being in a cartoon. I feel like I'm in a cartoon for little girls!

"My turn then. Can you tell me about the land I am in right now?" I grin a bit as I say this. I've phrased my question in such a way that Zecora will have to give me a lot of information. Hey, have fun composing a poem for THAT! I don't even know why I care so much that she rhymes every two sentences.

Zecora brings a hoof to her mouth, as if thinking. It's weird to see all these human like mannerisms from a damn zebra. While she thinks, I drink a bit of my soup, almost choking as I accidentally swallow a mushroom whole.

"Equestria is the name of our fair nation. Of peacetime, there is no cessation. Ponies primarily live here. To the princesses, they are subjects most dear. Unfortunately, all else that I can say would seem trite. You would be better off speaking with Twilight," she finally related to me. I glance at her, impressed that she managed to pull off all those rhymes.

Now, speaking in rhymes tends to muddle the information, so I took a moment to sort out what she had said in my head. I'm in a country called...snrrk...Equestria. God, that's so fucking dumb. And I was apparently right when I said there might be a civilization of ponies running around. Is this really happening right now? Humans are replaced by ponies as the apex race? There's so much stupid right now, I don't know if I can take it.

Equestria is apparently ruled by princesses. I don't if that means there's a king or queen that doesn't do shit, but whatever. Now, I don't know how to speak with the twilight, considering that's a time of day. I swear, if she tells me that each time of the day is a living entity, I might die from laughing so hard.

"Who or what is Twilight?" I pressed. I receive a knowing look from Zecora in return. "Oh...right. It's not my turn anymore."

"The end of the human race must have been tragic. Tell me, did your kind use any magic?" She takes a long draft of her soup after she finishes talking. I raise an eyebrow. Seems like the first half of that statement is unnecessary. Heh, it's funny to see the measures she takes to make a rhyme.

"What? No, humans don't use magic. Hell, I didn't even know magic was a thing until yesterday. And I'm STILL not quite sure I believe it's actually magic, and not just very high-end technology." I wish I could use magic. I'd have torn that Sombra bastard a new asshole. Scratch that, I'd turn his entire body to ash.

"Hm...that statement proves many scientists wrong. The belief in that theory was quite strong." Zecora looks interested and troubled at the same time. I feel my ego swell a bit at the thought of proving some stuffed up suits completely wrong. So essentially, this situation is like I'm a Roman, visiting a historian and telling them, "Oh, by the way, Caesar was actually killed by me." Of course, that's not true, but it would still be fucking hilarious to see.

"Well, sucks to be them. Anyway, answer my last question," I snap, somewhat impatient. I finish my soup while she thinks up her answer. I'm now pleasantly full, which is surprising because I don't remember soup as all that filling.

"Twilight Sparkle is the personal student of the Solar Princess. She resides in the nearby town of Ponyville, where she has met much success," Zecora answers without missing a beat. Hang on what? There's a pony called Twilight Sparkle? I can't help it. I burst out laughing, startling Zecora. Twilight Sparkle? Seriously? I bet she's a vampire too.

"There's...snrkk...a town called Ponyville?" I choke out between laughs. However, Zecora gives me that look again. "Oh come on! It's a yes or no question!"

Zecora hesitates, and then nods. I laugh harder at that. "There's a bunch of ponies running around in a town called Ponyville! How totally original! Why, I'm so inspired I'll go start up a colony and call it Humanville!" Except I can't, because every other human is dead. I see Zecora frown at my rude humor, but I could honestly care less what she thinks. I'm the last human. People...or should I say...ponies will talk to me whether I'm an asshole or not.

"I only saw you on your desperate run. Are there more humans than just one?" Zecora asks softly, causing my laughter to die off immediately. Did she really have to ask that fucking question?

"No. My family is dead. My friends are dead. Everyone's dead. It's just me. I'm the only one left," I answered sharply. The edge in my voice causes Zecora's head to snap back. Yeah, now she gets how bad of a question that was. Suddenly, I feel a pressure on my shoulder, though not on my injury. I turn to see Zecora gazing at me with sympathy in her blue eyes. It's her hoof resting on my shoulder, as if she's trying to reassure me. Yeah. Like that's going to work. I lightly push the hoof off. "Sympathy won't bring them back," I muttered.

There's an awkward silence after that. Eventually, I see Zecora take the bowls away to wherever her kitchen is. Now that she's gone, I turn my gaze back to the ceiling. Wow, I'm already tired, and I haven't even done much other than talk. Guess my body isn't ready for movement just yet.

Right as I'm starting to drift off, Zecora appears again, this time holding a glass of what I assume to be water atop her hoof. Still don't know how the hell she does that. When she offers it to me, I take it gratefully. "Thank you," I say to her gruffly, and then I drain the glass dry in a matter of seconds, because I'm thirsty as hell. When I'm done with the first glass, Zecora takes it away and produces another glass for me to drink, which I do.

"Do you mind if we take a break so I can get some sleep? I'm really tired for some reason," I queried, not looking at her.

"Ah, I should have known our discourse would have reduced your stamina by some. If you need me, call, and I will come." Zecora leaves me alone and canters back out of sight. I'll take that as a yes.

All it takes is a few seconds before I succumb to the blissful embrace of sleep.

* * *

The next morning, I wake up to hear the sound of Zecora humming in the main room of which I have yet to see. She must be cooking, because I can detect a pleasant aroma in the air.

I try to move again. Oh, well it still hurts like a bitch. Not as much as yesterday, but there it is. I can at least move my head, neck, and even my arms, as long as I don't bump them or anything. Looking at my arms, I can see that the bandages wrapped around them aren't stained with blood, like they were before. I guess that means that at some point, while I was asleep, Zecora must have changed my bandages. I'm not sure how I feel about her poking and prodding all around my naked body while I'm unconscious, but I'm at least grateful for the first aid.

On a side note, I really need to pee. I haven't moved from this bed in who knows how long.

"Uh...Zecora? Is there a bathroom or something around here?" I call to her hesitantly. Her humming stops the moment I start talking, and then I can hear the sound of her hooves clopping across the floor. Soon, she turns the corner, a smile on her face.

"It is good to see you awake. If you'll give me just a few minutes, your breakfast I will make." Zecora greeted me with a rhyme as always, but I'm actually starting to get used to them, believe it or not. It's like having my own personal poet. Oh hell, I bet she'd be a damn good singer. Maybe I should ask? That would be a laugh.

"Thanks for the..." I trail off as I see Zecora sliding a small pan near the bed. "I have to use that, don't I? Goddammit."

It makes sense, considering my injuries. However, since most of my wounds are concentrated on my upper body, I should be able to start walking soon. I wait until Zecora leaves the area completely, and then I try to position myself appropriately. That's a bit hard though. I'm trying to move my body without irritating my wounds...oh fuck it. "Ah...son of a bitch!" I curse as I push myself upright with my right arm. My back is killing me, thanks to that blasted Oppressed I fought, and the cuts on my arm are burning like fire.

It's easier to move around now that I'm in a sitting position, so I take the opportunity and relieve myself into the pan. Afterwards, I lay back down, sighing as the pain abates after a few seconds. "Well, I've never been confined to my bed before. I don't think I like it," I remarked to myself.

"I am sorry if you are bored. If you would like to read a book, I have many of them stored." Apparently Zecora heard me. Huh, a book actually sounds good. Wait, they have books? Does that mean ponies can write? How...they have hooves! The only reason we could write so well was because of our hands, so what the fuck?

"That'd be real nice," I called back to her. It's been forever since I last curled up in bed with a good book, since I had a laptop and internet. I did all of my reading on fanfiction sites. Mostly for anime. You'd be surprised how many good Dragon Ball stories there are.

A few minutes pass before Zecora returns. She sets a plate of what looks like salad down on my lap gently, and then sets a pile of books on a table near me.

"Enjoy your food. I would like to know if a human finds it good," Zecora tells me with a smile. Then she trots back the way she came. I watch her go, somewhat confused.

"Where are you going? Don't you have to eat too?" I ask curiously.

"On breakfast, I have already dined. Today, there are more herbs that I must find," is Zecora's reply. I guess that confirms my suspicions. She's a herbalist. That explains why my wounds are healing so fast. Use the right herbs, and healing is a snap. Despite all of my complaints about luck, I got extremely lucky finding her.

"Wait, you're going out into the forest? What about those wolves?" I demanded. If the place was super dangerous for me, I'd assume it's even more so for a zebra.

"There is no need for concern. There is little threat to me as far as I can discern," are Zecroa's last words before I hear the door to the hut open and close. Huh. Well, I'll trust that she knows what she's doing. Though I'll be pretty pissed if she goes and gets herself killed.

I look down at my salad. The salad appears to be covered in some sort of spice. Actually...is that cheese? Oh hell yes. I look around, and then realize that I wasn't given silverware. Of course. Hooves. I really need to remember this shit.

So how the fuck do you eat salad without a fork? I lift a single salad leaf to my mouth with my fingers. It's actually not that bad. It doesn't taste like any salad I've eaten before, but I like it. It would be nice if I could eat more than one leaf at a time...oh fuck it. I grab a handful of leaves and shove it all into my mouth at once, not even caring that cheese and bits of it are going everywhere. I'm hungry, dammit.

On the bright side, eating this way is easier than using a fork. Especially when I reach the last bits of salad that a fork just will NOT pick up. So I'm done with my food in no time at all. I brush my hands off above the plate, and then set it aside on the table.

I grab the first book on the table and open it up...only to groan at what I see. It's written in a language I don't know. The same one the labels on the bottles are written in. Taking a closer look, I'd say the language looks a little bit like katakana. Only it's not. Essentially, these books are useless to me.

I toss the book back on the table and collapse into my bed. "Great...so I'm stuck here in this hut with nothing to do and no company for hours," I complain. Then I remember something. Where the hell is my phone? I know I brought it with me. It was in my pocket when I left the science building. I'm naked right now, so I'm guessing Zecora has it with the rest of my clothes. I hope to god she didn't try washing them with my phone still in it. I...oh shit. I have the last remains of the human race on that phone. Including what's left of my family and friends. The thought makes me depressed. I can maybe squeeze out a day or two worth of charge if I don't use it for anything other than viewing photos, but after that there will be nothing left of my race.

I know what to do. I'm going back to sleep. I have something to ask Zecora when she gets back. I mean, I don't know if I can get back to sleep, but there's nothing else to do.

Just after deciding to sleep, my eyelids start to droop. Huh, I guess with how hurt I am, my body really wants its rest.

* * *

I wake with a start upon hearing the tell tale clopping of hooves entering the house. The first thing I notice is that I feel good. Much better than before. I guess that makes this next part easier to do.

"So I figured out I can't read your language," I say casually to Zecora. Normal greetings are for the week. "Come to think of it, it's really odd that we even speak the same language in the first place."

"The chances of such are indeed unique. Twilight may know more about this subject of much mystique," Zecora responded in stride as she turned the corner. She is carrying some bags "I apologize for leaving you to boredom with no respite. For entertainment, you must have been desperate."

"You have no idea. By the way, you keep mentioning this Twilight chick. Does she really know all that much?" I say, changing the subject. I'm not all that comfortable with apologies. Zecora nods her head. "Interesting. I've half a mind to pay this woman a visit."

At that last sentence, Zecora cocks her head and gives me a confused look. "Pony...pay this pony a visit. Ugh, I'm never going to get used to that," I correct myself, feeling a bit sheepish. "Which brings me to what I wanted to ask you next. Think you can help me get up? I want to try walking."

I can tell Zecora isn't all that thrilled with that idea. "It is not a good idea for you to move so soon. It would be tragic if you were to swoon," she advised me. Despite her words, I was already moving.

"I'm getting up anyway, with your help or without it," I tell her flatly. My wounds sting a little bit as I force myself into a sitting position, but it's easier than last time. Since the bleeding was stemmed at least a day ago, I assume the smallest cuts are scabbed.

Then I realized something awkward. I'm completely naked. I turn and yank the undersheets from the bed and as I put my feet on the floor, I wrap it around my lower half. Zecora steps forward as I lurch up and attempt to put some weight on my feet.

I almost immediately fall over, as my feet haven't had much use since my desperate run through the forest. Thankfully, Zecora keeps me from falling down totally by catching me with her hooves. "Shit," I muttered. With her help, I manage to stand up fully. "Think I can get my pants?"

"Why do you insist on wearing clothes? Without them, everypony usually goes," Zecora asks. Wait, did she seriously just ask me that? Of course ponies run around naked. They're _ponies_. Essentially animals.

"Look, just do it. I don't feel like explaining," I snap. I won't feel comfortable until I'm wearing some pants. "I'll be fine."

Zecora lets me go, though she looks a bit hurt that I snapped at her. Well, who cares. I wobble in place for a bit, so I use my hand to hold me up. I wince as pain shoots through my arm. This is going to be difficult.

I follow her into the main room, getting a good look at it for the first time. The first thing I notice is the giant ass cauldron in the center of the room. There's nothing in it now, but I'm guessing that's where she makes her food. Judging from the size of it, it must be a bitch to clean. There's more of those creepy masks hanging everywhere, along with some colored bottles. They're also labeled in...I can't believe I'm saying this...Equestrian. Snrk...that's so stupid. Cute little ponies. They think they're people.

The place is lit by candles. Guess that explains why everything is so dim. Yup, ponies don't use electricity. Life here is going to suck. I can always go back and get my laptop from the school...yeah no. Fuck that place with a brick. Sorry laptop, you can stay there. Oh wait! I left my schoolwork! I need to go back an...okay, I can't even keep a straight face for that one.

Other than a few shelves lining the walls, this place is a little bare. What the hell does she do with herself every day?

I trail after Zecora until I see my clothes, pressed and clean, hanging from a rack on the wall. I walk past her and grab my pants immediately, as well as my phone and rifle, which are sitting on a shelf next to them.

A few minutes later, I'm wearing my pants again, with my phone in my pocket. Fuck shirts. As long as I have these wounds, I'm not wearing them. "All right, I guess this works. So when can I go see this Twilight?" I'm feeling restless. I mean, I do spend a lot of my day in bed when I'm not working, but I always have something to do, like read or play a game. I have none of that here, so I want to get moving.

"You should really take time to heal, or else more pain you will feel," Zecora warned, causing me to roll my eyes.

"Yeah, that's great and all, but I'm not staying cooped up in this place if I can help it," I grunted in annoyance. "So you can take me there, or I'll go on my own and likely die in the process. So what'll it be?"

"I do not want you to get hurt again. You drive quite the hard bargain," Zecora says relucantly. She doesn't look at all happy with the risks I'm taking. Fuck her, though. I'll go stir crazy if I don't get moving soon.

"Wonderful. Let's go then." I grabbed my shirt off of the rack and sling it over my shoulder...which I then regret because I'm hurt there. Fucking ow. Next, I grab my rifle. In the worst case scenario, it'll be better than using my fists.

Without even waiting for Zecora, I throw open the front door and step outside into the forest. It looks really different in the sunlight compared to how it was at night. By that, I mean it looks more like a natural environment and not the kind of thing you'd see in a nightmare. There's also a path that stretches out between a gap in the thicker parts of the forest. It's pretty wide. I wish I had known that was there a night or two ago. I haven't really looked at my phone that much because I want so save battery, so I've lost track of time.

"Ponyville lies at the end of this path. It is best to stay on the road, lest you face the Everfree's wrath." Zecora soon joins me outside, wearing something that looks like saddlebags. That's odd...seems relatively like something we humans use on our horses. I guess it's a little like Mass Effect, where the ponies drew some influence from human technology.

We walk in silence together for a while, probably because I have nothing to say to her. I got what I needed out of her. What I need to do now is find this Twilight, get as much information on how much the world I know has changed. I'll see how much she knows about Sombra himself. Then, I'll find him and exact revenge for everything I've lost.

"I do not mean to pry, but you seem troubled. May I ask why?" Zecora finally says after a few moments of walking.

"Gee, I dunno. Maybe because I'm alone in a world filled with talking ponies and zebras?" I answered her sarcastically.

"I have not forgotten your situation, you see. I am referring to your bitterness towards me." Zecora's words have a nasty effect of putting me on the spot. I feel a little guilty now...but that doesn't matter.

"Look, I appreciate you feeding me and patching me up, that's as far as things go. I'm not looking for friends, now or ever," I told her firmly, without looking back at her. Zecora falls silent. I don't have to look back at her to know that she's wearing a hurt expression.

"Nopony...or human...can be an island, else the pain soon gets out of hand," she warns me in a quiet voice. I turn around and look at her, not expecting a line like that. She's gazing back at me with her dark, soulful eyes. Troubled, I return my gaze to the front and keep silent.

* * *

The shadows are starting to grow long when we finally reach the edge of the forest. If I had to guess, I'd say the time is around six or seven in the afternoon.

More importantly, as I step out of the forest, I get my first look at the land in which I'm going to be staying in for the rest of my life. Green, rolling hills stretched out before me for as far as I can see. I can also see some mountains very faintly in the distance...and is that a castle on its side? How in the hell is it not falling down the side?

Splayed out before me is a fairly large village that I think may be Ponyville. I don't see any other settlements around, so it has to be. There's a few notable exceptions, but the town is mostly made up of small plaster houses with wooden frames and thatched roofs.

In the direct center of the town, there's a large circular structure that rises above the rest of town. There's a huge open area surrounding it, so that must be the town square. Which makes that big building...the town hall?

To my left, there is something that looks like a forest, but it's too orderly to be one. Hang on, I see apples in those trees. Is that an apple farm? I wonder why they farm stuff like that and not more useful crops, like rice and wheat. Can you even live off of a diet of only apples? Probably not. There's probably more farms out there that I can't see.

I do note that I can't see anything in the town that I would most definitely see in a human settlement. No power plant, no telephone poles, no transformers, and certainly no radio towers. I can't help but chuckle a bit at the irony. Sombra sent me to the future, but it feels like I'm in the past.

"Thanks again for the food and stuff. I'm heading in to town," I called back to Zecora, breaking the awkward silence between us.

"Goodbye, and be careful in the city. Many ponies will find you to be an oddity," Zecora informed me, turning around to head back into the forest.

"Noted. Maybe I'll see you later," I replied wryly, knowing that there's no way I'm going back into that forest if I can help it.

With that, I started walking down the hill, heading towards town. I've seen a zebra, but I've never actually seen one of the ponies that supposedly rule the country. This should be enlightening. Hopefully they're at least somewhat competent.

It's not long before I see one. I'm walking down the street, on the outskirts of town, when all of a sudden a brightly colored blur zooms out of the sky and lands next to the nearest house. The two of us see one another at the same time, and we both freeze.

That's a pony? It barely looks like the grubby colored domesticated animals we had back in my civilization. Not to mention its colors are completely off. Its fur is fucking sky blue, and its mane and tail are an even lighter shade of blue, closer to cyan.

Its mane is arranged on its head not like a typical pony, but like the hairstyles we humans would have had. It even has a fucking pink bow on its head. Her mane falls down and frames the pony's extremely expressive face, which is currently stuck in expression of surprise and wonder.

Then I notice that she has wings. Let me repeat that. WINGS. There's a fucking pony...with wings. Doesn't that make it a pegasus? Ugh, how dumb is this world going to get?

I take a step back, but the pony gulps nervously and actually walks up to me, brushing her mane aside with a hoof almost like a human girl would. "H...hello. Are...are you a human?" it stammers. Her voice was soft and feminine.

"That's right," I answered casually. Since the pony is so much smaller than I am, I kneel down until I'm looking straight at her, and not down at her. Her eyes widened visibly. Hah, she was scared of me. Still...gotta give the girl props for her bravery. She did walk up to a complete unknown that might have hurt her. "Are you a pony?"

"Well...yes, I am. I'm called Flitter." She introduced herself, her voice getting more stable the more she talks. Flitter, huh? Definitely a unique name. I can't recall any humans with a name like that. I like it. "It's...very nice to meet you, sir."

Sir? Me, getting respect from the first pony I see? Maybe living in this area won't be so bad after all. "My name is Seth Rogers. I'm looking for a...what was her name...Twilight Cullen?" No, I didn't forget her name. It's just fucking funny. Shut up, it was a solid joke...even if the original series was crap.

"You mean Twilight Sparkle?" Flitter asked, her snout crinkling with confusion.

"Yes...I mean Twilight Sparkle." I couldn't help but facepalm. Just like always, I make references that no one gets. No matter how much life changes, it always stays the same.

"Oh, okay. She's usually in her home in Golden Oaks Library," Flitter informed me. When I raised an eyebrow at the lack of information, she flushed nervously and continued. "If you follow this road all the way down and take the second right you see, take another right and then your second left, and then one last right, you'll find it on the end of that street."

"Thank you," I said tersely, immediately starting to walk again. A sudden thought struck me after I had gone a few feet, so I turned back around. "By the way, how do you know what I am?"

Flitter jumped slightly, not expecting me to talk to her again. "There's somepony in town who is interested in human culture and history. I've seen a few of her sketches," she explained. Somepony? So fucking dumb. Satisfied, I turned around and continued on my way into town.

Only a few minutes pass before I start seeing more and more ponies. They're all colored so damn brightly and randomly that the mish mash of colors is starting to hurt my eyes. I also notice a small trend among height. The female ponies are the smaller ones and have more rounded jaws, while the male ponies are taller and are more muscular, with square jaws. I also note that there aren't that many males at all. Heh. Sucks to be a girl here. Bet there's major competition for the few males. Not that I care either way.

When the first pony takes notice of me, she lets out a gasp and points a hoof at me. Suddenly, every goddamn pony in the streets starts staring at me with curiosity and wonder. I grit my teeth and keep walking, hoping that they'll get over it soon. I mean, they have half naked humans with rifles show up all the time, right? Pfft.

No such luck. When I get past that one street and follow it to the right, more ponies take notice of me, while some of the earlier ones start following me. I'm getting more and more annoyed the longer this goes on. Don't they have anything better to do than watch a previously thought to be extinct species walk...have you ever had a moment where you're in the middle of a sentence and you realize how stupid you sound?

Finally, after I take the second left Flitter told me about, I lose my temper with the crowd of curious ponies. "You know, if you could not stare at me, that would be great," I snapped angrily at everyone surrounding me. My outburst takes all of them by surprise, as if they weren't expecting me to speak their language.

I hear a few mumbled apologies and see a few turn their heads obediently, but others don't even listen, and continue to stare. Well, it's better than before. I'll just keep moving.

The situation only gets worse the further in I go. More ponies that didn't hear me come out to stare at me in wonder. No matter how many times I snapped at them, it didn't seem to do any good, because more would show up. God, it's just like dealing with people back home!

"What I am is none of your GODDAMN BUSINESS!" I shouted as I made one of the last turns. My shouts actually scare some of them, causing the more timid ones to scatter in every direction, while others just retreat and gaze at me from places where they think I can't see them.

Not even two seconds after that last outburst, I see a blur of bright pink, and something hits me right in my chest, knocking me over. I cry out in agony as some of that pressure aggravates my wounds. "Ow...fucking...son of a bitch..." I curse quite loudly, attempting to rise again by putting my weight on my rifle.

"Oh gosh, I'm so sorry! I didn't see you there because I was in the middle of a delivery and I didn't want to be late and..." the one talking possesses a really annoyingly high pitched voice, and she talks a fucking mile a minute. I look up to see that the pony who knocked me over was colored a bright pink, with an impossibly frizzy darker pink mane. She also has the image of three balloons on her flank. What that means, I dunno. However, the moment she sees what I am, she makes a really overexaggerated gasp seconds before a massive smile crosses her face. "WOW! You must be one of those humany thingies which means you're new in town! I can tell because I know everypony! Wait, if you're new then you must not have any friends...which is-"

"For the love of all that's holy, shut the fuck up!" I snapped at her. My sudden interruption causing her to stop talking. "Can you get some perspective? Instead of ranting on about some inane bullshit I could care less about, shouldn't you instead be worrying about how you running around like a chicken with its head cut off may have reopened that gash in my side?!" My voice rises to a shout over the course of that one sentence. My hand is clenched to my side, hoping that no real damage was done.

The pink pony is gazing at me with a distraught expression on her face. "I'm sorry, I didn't know that...," she began, but her voice was just giving me a headache, so I pushed my way past her.

"Just get the fuck out of my way," I growled, and limped away from her, noticing the stares sent my way by the other ponies changing from wonder to shock and anger.

* * *

Zecora is so difficult to write lines for. I spent six hours staring at a page because I was trying to think up some rhymes for her.

Finally, we're in Ponyville! We had our first encounter with (best pony) Pinkie Pie, though it was short and not very sweet.


	4. Memories of Another Time

I think I may have yelled at somebody important. I can tell because all the ponies I'm passing now seem to hate me. No more looks of wonder or questioning glances, just anger or cold stares. Fine by me. That's the kind of look I'm used to getting. One step closer to this place feeling like home.

I make one more turn and rest against the nearest wall, shoving away a pony that was already there, much to her indignation. "Excuse you!" she snaps at me, but I just ignore her until she leaves in a huff. I'm more interested in discerning whether or not my side is bleeding again. I look down at my exposed bandages, worrying a bit, but then I sigh in relief when I see that there's no red stain on them. That's a load off my mind. I'd have had that pink pony for lunch if she had injured me all over again. I'm sure she'd taste good with a little spice. And maybe some honey mustard. Hell, I don't know what I'm talking about.

The first thing that stands out to me when I look up is the extremely large tree situated in the general area of where Flitter told me to go. Of course, what stands out about the tree is how it looks more like a house than anything else. There's a bright red door that's built for ponies, several windows, and I think I see a balcony near the top. That's one tripped out tree. It's like I'm living in a Minecraft server. You know, only with less explosions.

There's a sign with a bunch of books displayed on it just in front of the tree. I suppose that means this is my destination. I swear, this Twilight better be as respectful as Flitter was, or I might blow a gasket. This pony town is grating on my nerves.

I walk up towards the door, dreading the meeting that I'm forcing myself to have. A few quick knocks on the door later, and the deed is done. I can hear the sound of someone moving around inside.

"...t's fine! I'll just tell whoever it is that you're busy!" sounded a young male voice from inside. I frown when I hear that. That shit isn't going to fly.

The door opens fully, revealing the interior of the library. I can see that the walls are inlaid with many shelves, which are stocked full of hundreds of books. Yep, this is definitely the library. But where's the one who opened the door?

"Ahem. Down here, buddy," says the voice again. I look down, and to my shock, there's a purple lizard thing staring up at me, looking none too amused. "Can I help you with something?"

"Yeah, you can get the fuck out of my way so I can talk to Twilight," I respond matter of factly, and make to enter the library. Almost immediately after I took the first step, the lizard spits out a tongue of green fire that burns my shins something fierce. "Ow! What the...fuck you!"

After winding my foot back for half a second, I kick the fucker right back into the library with enough force for him to hit the wall. The impact caused books to fall on top of him, obscuring him from view. "Okay, so not a big lizard, but a tiny dragon. Because those apparently exist too...fuck this world..." I grumbled, walking into the library.

My rifle is immediately held at the ready as the dragon bursts out of the pile of books. "Okay dragon, you will not believe the week I've had, and if you make it any worse I swear I'll beat your tiny ass into the ground!" I snarled at him.

"Spike!" A female voice cries out in horror, and then I see another pony gallop into the room. This one is colored a soft shade of lavender and possessed a dark purple mane with a magenta stripe running through it. I can also see the horn that signifies her as a unicorn. Zecora hadn't been kidding. Lastly, that mark everyone seems to have on their flanks is a pink star with white sparkles all around it.

"Twilight, he tried to force his way in and kicked me!" Spike accused, pointing a tiny claw at me.

"Yeah, but not before you burned me and...what the fuck?" In the middle of my counterargument, I'm suddenly unable to move at all. Twilight is glaring at me, and her horn is glowing a bright magenta. Is...how the hell is she doing that?

"Wait...you're...you're human!" Twilight finally noticed that we differ in species, her jaw dropping in awe. Too bad her surprise doesn't cause her to let go of me with...fuck it, I'll just call it magic unless someone tells me otherwise.

"Just noticed that now, did you?" I comment, looking at my body. That same magenta glow that's shimmering around her horn is also around me, so I'm assuming that's her...magic...that's doing it. "Can you let me go now?"

Twilight sits down out of pure shock. "But...you're all supposed to be extinct. You have been for almost three thousand years!" she protests.

"Yeah, well, not all of us. Guess you'd better check your fa...wait, THREE THOUSAND?!" I was in the middle of composing a witty response when I did a double take. My resulting yell is enough to startle both Spike and Twilight. "I've been gone for three thousand fucking years?"

"Th...that's right. There's not much left of your kind other than ancient ruins or fragmented data caches," Twilight confirmed. I'm quiet for a good minute.

"Spike, I'm sorry for kicking you and trying to force past you. Twilight, I'm sorry for hurting your assistant. Can you let me go? I...need to think," I said in an oddly calm voice, despite how fast my mind was racing. All of the different possiblities and explanations resulting from this revelation are mixing together in my mind in a perplexing mess.

Spike smiles a bit at my apology, and then he looks at Twilight. The unicorn's eyes soften at my words, and she finally releases her magical hold over me. "Okay. Let's start over. Why don't you tell me your story over a cup of hot tea?" Twilight offers with a hopeful expression. I don't have it in me to decline, given the circumstances, so I give her a mute nod. "Spike, can you boil some water for us?"

"Happy to help, Twilight!" the dragon replied eagerly, scampering off into the kitchen.

I sit down against the wall opposite the staircase that led to the upper levels of the treehouse. I'm careful not to jostle any of my wound, because that would hurt.

It hasn't just been 70 years. Come to think of it, that isn't enough time for an entirely new species to evolve. I never really thought of it like that before. I knew some time had passed since humanity perished, but I didn't think it had been that long.

Three thousand years. Three millenia. Dammit, how am I supposed to handle something like this? I'm just a college kid who spends his days reading. This is just too much. It's no surprise the school building had been so messed up. Hell, the better question is why it is still standing. I bet the architects in the afterlife are proud of themselves.

I look up, and I notice that Twilight is next to me, gazing at me sympathetically. Don't...don't look at me like that. I don't need your sympathy. It won't bring my race back. It won't give me the three thousand years taken from me back. All you're doing is making me feel guilty.

Whistling sounds from the kitchen, and I hear Spike calling for Twilight. "Coming!" the unicorn calls back, and then she looks at me. "Ready?"

"Sure, whatever," I grunt, using my rifle to get up again. Man, I am glad I found this gun, even if it is just a glorified walking stick at this point.

Following Twilight to her kitchen, I wonder exactly what I'm going to tell her. I don't want to tell her the full story. I mean, I just met her. That's no where near enough time to trust her. Eh, I'll just wing it.

There's a small table in the room, with small stools arranged around it. "Take a seat, please. I'll be there in just a moment," Twilight tels me, indicating one of the stools. Heh, she sounds like a doctor or something. I was going to sit down anyway, so I do as I'm told.

I'm almost too tall for this table. I guess I'm going to have to get used to that, considering everything in this town is pony-sized. It feels really good to sit down, though my side is still killing me. Damn that pink menace.

That tea smells really good, surprisingly. I've never been a real tea drinker. Nor was I fan of coffee. It's the hospitality that matters I suppose.

"So...human, huh?" Spike suddenly asks, hopping up on one of the stools. I glance at him wryly. That's about as articulate as a college student at a party.

"You know, it's not exactly fair for you all to get all the questions. I know as much about you as you know about me," I point out calmly. Before Spike can reply, Twilight starts talking.

"Well, I do know that humans were omnivorous and gathered together in large groups. They also possess a remarkable level of dexterity, allowing them to construct small, yet more complex technological constructs capable of retaining a great deal of data," she relates to me in an excited tone. When she took a breath, I jumped in.

"Okay, so you know more about me than I know about you. So it's only fair if I get to ask the first questions," I interject, a little surprised. Twilight shuts her mouth, looking nonplussed.

"You do have a point. So what do you want to know?" she admits, though she looks a bit disappointed that she can't ask me anything just yet.

"Well, here's a question. If you know so much about our technology, why don't I see any of it around?" I really wanted to know this. If ponies know about our technology, why are they living in the middle ages?

"That's because most of what our archaeologists find that is still intact are literature caches and some common living objects. The more technologically advanced items that we find are usually too deteriorated to be of much use, though we have managed to reverse engineer electricity of a kind. Only the wealthier ponies can afford such a commodity though." Wow, Twilight is a wordy little pony. Considering she lives in a library, I don't know what I expected.

"So it's accurate to say that the most advanced technology you have is based on human technology?" I reiterated her own words, making sure I understood.

"That's right! So you see why it's so exciting to meet one of you in the flesh! Think of all the things our society can learn from you! Why, I could write a paper on the potential information I gain from this meeting! Oh, the princess would be so proud..." Twilight answers animatedly, her tone getting more excited the more she spoke. Guess I'd better rain on her parade.

"Sorry, but you didn't get a scholar or an engineer. You got a college student who at most can give you random facts," I cut across her. A look of disappointment crosses her face, but only for a moment.

Before she replies, she finishes serving the tea. It's the freakiest thing. That same magenta glows surrounds both the kettle and the cups. The kettle then just lifts itself up and pours tea into each of the three cups without Twilight ever laying a hand...er...a hoof on it. That magic is really damn useful.

She starts talking again after she levitates the cups over to the table. "That doesn't mean I can't learn about your culture. You wouldn't mind telling me about your customs, holidays, government structure, and the like. Oh, how about your family? Can I hear about how a typical human family works?" Her enthusiasm keeps rising no matter what I say. I need to put a stop to this.

"No, you can't," I interrupted flatly before she could ask any more questions. She doesn't seem to notice at first.

"Great! I want to hear about...wait, no? Why not?" Twilight adopts this really sad expression that I might find adorable on a pet. I'm having the hardest time viewing these ponies as anything other than animals.

"I didn't come here to be interrogated about things I'd rather lay to rest. My race is dead now. What does it matter?" I answered irritably. I grab the tea in front of me and sip at it. It wasn't bad, tasting a little fruity and sweet. I have no idea what kind of tea it is, though.

"But...wouldn't you want your kind to live on in the form of literature?" Twilight pressed, leaning closer to me. I scoff a bit. Spoken like a true librarian.

"You mistake me for someone who cares about that kind of thing," I snorted derisively. Twilight looks so damn depressed at that answer that I can't help but feel a little bad. Fuck, these ponies are like kittens in how they have that innate cuteness...and if you tell ANYONE I said that, I will find you, and I will eviscerate you. "But...I'll considering telling you something if you can answer me one thing."

Twilight brightens up like I had just flipped a switch. "What is it? I'll tell you anything!" she promises eagerly. Anything? Just the way she phrased that makes me want to ask her something super embarassing. Like her sex life. And...wow, I disgusted myself on that one. As funny as that would be, I don't want to know. No, I know what I really want.

"Who is King Sombra, and where can I find him?" I growled, my tone visibly changing. My hand clenches the tea cup so hard, I'm surprised it hasn't broken. Twilight is taken aback by the violent tone in my voice.

"Sombra? I've never heard of anypony like that," she tells me, her ears flattening.

"Dammit! I KNOW he came to this era," I cursed, slamming my fist on the table, causing the two of them to wince. I drain about half of the cup of tea, wishing it was something stronger.

"Is he another human?" Twilight asked curiously, that spark of excitement entering her eyes again. Don't get too excited. When I find him, I'm going to put that Sombra through a meat grinder. Have fun studying him then.

"I doubt it. He was wearing the same shape as us, but his coloring was all wrong. Not to mention he could use magic. He used some kind of time travel spell to send me into the future. That's why I'm here," I explained.

"Wait, time travel? Twilight, isn't there a spell like that in the-" Spike began.

"Starswirl the Bearded Wing in the Canterlot Archives?" Twilight finished excitedly. I have no idea what any of those things means, but it seems like they believe me. "I used it once to go the the past-"

"And started a time loop paradox," Spike remarked. Twilight's ears flattened again, this time out of embarassment.

"Hold on. You went to the past?" Twilight had my full attention now. When she nodded, I started to grin. "Get me this spell. I want to go home."

Twilight and Spike exchange glances, looking unsure. "Look...uh...Mr..."

"Seth Rogers,"

"Mr. Rogers. That spell, while it does allow travel to the past, the amount of time the spell can be maintained depends on both the level of magic of the spell caster, and how far back the user goes. I went back for a week, and only lasted for a few moments before returning to this time," Twilight informs me. My spirits drop like a stone.

"And Twilight's one of the strongest unicorns in all of Equestria!" Spike brags, but is soon hushed by an embarrassed Twilight.

"I can't believe that. Is this the only time travel spell? Because Sombra sent me three fucking millenia into the future, after doing the same himself. Explain that one to me, genius," I counter, not wanting to believe that what seemd to be my only way home may be barred to me. I finish my tea with a few more gulps.

"Well, according to a few accounts, Starswirl was in the middle of stabilizing the time spell, but he passed before he could. Even if this Sombra was able to bypass the temporary nature of the spell, it would still take an immense amount of magical power to send somepony that far forward or backward in time," Twilight theorizes, and then she takes a sip from her tea. "The only ones I know with that kind of power are the princesses."

"Then get the princesses to send me home," I demand, my temper rising.

"There's still the issue of the..."

"TAKE THE HINT, UNICORN, I DON'T WANT TO BE HERE!" I shout, startling both Twilight and Spike.

"I understand, Mr. Rogers, but I just don't think it's possible," Twilight admits. That doesn't help my temper any.

"DAMMIT!" I hurl the teacup across the room in frustration. Twilight manages to catch it with her magic before it hits anything, and she deposits it in the sink carefully.

"Hey, it's all right-" she tries to comfort me.

"No it's not," I snap, but she continues talking anway.

"I'll help you find this Sombra if you don't mind waiting in town for a while," Twilight promised. I glance at her in surprise.

"Really? Why would you bother helping me, a total stranger who's not even the same species as you? What do you get out of it?" I ask her. I'm confused, because I know I certainly wouldn't help someone out unless I stood to benefit in some way. Unless it was Amaryllis. Then I'd hem and haw a bit, but I'd eventually do it.

"Me? Nothing. I don't see a stranger standing before me. I see somepony who's lost in a land unfamiliar to them. I just want to help," Twilight answers, placing one of her hooves on my hand in an attempt to be reassuring. The contact is uncomfortable, so I extricate my hand and place it down by my side.

I then realize something. "Uh-huh. You're not fooling me. You just want the information I can give you so you can get all rich and famous after you write a book," I accuse her. Twilight actually has the nerve to look offended at that. Bitch, if I call you out on your bullshit, you own up to it.

"Hasn't anypony ever helped you out just out of kindness?" Twilight asks defensively.

"No," is my abrupt answer. That visibly deflates her. She looks a little surprised, and then looks sad.

"That's...not right. Are all humans like that?"

"Pretty much. Still want to know about us?" My expression is now a little smug, though I still don't understand why she's acting so surprised. I'm here to use her for information, so it shouldn't come as a surprise that I suspect her of doing the same.

"That's horrible. Why would you want to go back to a society like that?" Twilight demands. That gives me some pause. She has a point. Most of humanity is fucking worthless, anyway.

No, I can't say that. I think that the first and foremost reason I want to go back is so I can see my family and friend again. I want to see Amaryllis again, and finally ask her out. I want to spend some time with my family, which I've never really done on my own volition. I want to watch anime with my brother, and watch Maka growing up. There's so many thoughts running through my head, I only know one way to make it clear to Twilight.

"None of your damn business," I reply gruffly, earning a disappointed sigh from the unicorn. Looking out the window, I notice that the sun is dipping below the horizon. "It's getting late."

"Oh...yeah, time does pass quickly, doesn't it?" Twilight comments, laughing nervously. When I fix her with a very pointed look, she blanches and her ears fold back. "Sorry...bad choice of words. Anyhow, do you have someplace to stay?"

Yeah, I'm avoiding that trap. No way am I letting her offer me hospitality. She might dissect me in my sleep or something. She puts on a show of being a considerate friend, but I know scientific curiosity when I see it. I'm noping the fuck out of here. "Yeah, I've got a place," I lie. The streets it is, I guess. I don't have any money, so I'm starving tonight as well. "Thanks for the tea."

"You're very welcome. Um...when will I see you again?" Twilight asks hesitantly. I stand up, moving towards the door. Twilight gets up and follows me as well, with Spike not far behind. "Mr. Rogers?"

"Look, Mr. Rogers is my father. Call me Seth," I correct her. Then, I open the front door and step outside. Just before shutting the door, I say, "I'll come back tomorrow sometime."

My abrupt departure might have been a bit rude, but whatever. As I walk away, I can hear them talking.

"I don't like him. He's very mean," I heard Spike saying.

"Cut him some slack, Spike. He's lost his entire race," Twilight responds. Any further conversation is too faint to hear as I walk back out into the streets.

All of the ponies seem to be heading home now, as the streets are much emptier than before. Now, I need to find a nice patch of grass to stretch out on, if possible. This town is pretty rural, so that shouldn't be too hard. I'm not looking forward to how cold it will be, but I can use my shirt as a blanket. Maybe I can find some discarded newspapers or something to use as well.

I need a job. If I'm going to be staying in this town for a long period of time, I need lodging. The air smells a little wintry, so I'm guessing the nights will get colder and colder. I don't want to freeze to death. A job will help me find a place to stay.

After wandering for a bit, I look around to see if I can find any ponies. Soon, I spot two of them walking out of what looks to be a...club of sorts, if the loud rambunctious music blaring from the opening and the multicolored lights shining from the windows were any indication.

The pony closest to me is colored a soft mint green, and has a lyre tattooed on her flank. I made a mental note to ask Twilight what those are, and why everyone had them. No, I will not and will never say "everypony." I refuse. I'd cut my own tongue out first. Moving on, her mane and tail are the same color as her body, except for a few white streaks.

The second one is a beige color, and has...candy...for that mark. Huh. Guess she really likes candy. Her mane and tail are a mixture of dark blue and magenta. Well, I say a mixture, but the two colors are separate from one another. It's like two different stripes. Dammit, I'm no storyteller, I can't make fucking words sound good!

The moment they see me approaching them, the two of them scream in shock, scrambling up against a wall. "Oh for the love of god...get used to the fact that there's a human living in your town!" I groan. I'm getting so sick and tired of these skittish ponies.

"Wait, did you say 'human'?" The mint colored one asks excitedly, seemingly overcoming her initial fright.

"Oh no..." the other one remarks, slapping her hoof into her face. I try not to laugh at that. Is that the pony version of a facepalm? A facehoof! Hah, I'm so not clever.

"Yeah, I did. I'm human. Get your squealing and fangirling out of the way right now, so we can have an intelligent conversation," I respond, not in the mood to deal with another pony that wants to know everything about me and my kind.

"Oh...sorry, sir, I didn't mean to bother you. You've probably gotten that a lot since you arrived," the green one says. She's not so bad. Hear that respect? I can get used to that. "My name is Lyra Heartstrings. I've been reading a really good book series starring humans, so I got a little excited to meet one."

"Weren't you all extinct?" the other asked before I could get a word in edgewise. I transfixed her with a glare.

"You know, when someone introduces themselves, you usually let the other party do the same. So how about you shut the fuck up and save your questions for never?" I snap at the biege pony. My words cause her eyes to widen, clearly not expecting such a response. "Sorry, Lyra. Apparently your friend here doesn't know not to greet someone with 'weren't you dead?'"

"Yeah, I can see how that could be offensive. Don't be so hard on Bon Bon, she's never really liked the idea of humans," Lyra says, hiding a chuckle at Bon Bon's, which is a stupid fucking name, expense. "So what's your name, sir?"

"I'm Seth Rogers. I wanted to ask if you know someplace where someone like me can get a job. I have no idea what kind of currency you ponies use," I reply. So Lyra's not that bad, considering she's a pastel colored pony. Bon Bon is a bit of a prick, though.

"A job for a human? Well, there's a lot of more delicate work that needs doing around town," Bon Bon answers first. I can tell she's still miffed about my rudeness. Get the fuck over it. "I mean, the unicorns can't be everywhere."

"Also, I think the Apple family always accepts help out on the farm. You look strong enough," Lyra adds. Farm work, huh? Sounds like it'd be miserable as hell. It is something, though. Beggars can't be choosers.

"Didn't Vinyl say she could use some extra help with her equipment on her gig nights?" Bon Bon continues. Two job opportunities? And that second one looks like a part time job, so I technically can do both. At least it will give my now meaningless existence a point. Even if it is manual labor.

"Yeah, you could do that!" Lyra seemed a little too excited to be helping me out. Is that the fangirl in her? Speaking of which, I'm not sure how I feel about my race being in fiction books. Hah, that might make a fun evening. I should read those books and then send hate mail to the author on how inaccurate they are.

"Hm. Where can I find these peo...ponies?" Dammit, I will never get used to saying ponies instead of people.

"Well, Vinyl is still in the club packing up. You might be able to score some points if you help her out now," Bon Bon suggests, pointing a hoof at the building they just emerged from. Well, that's a start. I can't really do any manual labor until my injuries heal, but it'll be nice to see my potential employer. "Just look for the pony with the shades."

Pony in shades? What have I gotten myself into...oh well. Might as well do it. "Thanks, you two. I'll go do that now." I say, turning to walk towards the club. Just before I reach it, Lyra calls out to me.

"Hey!" I turn my head to look at her. "Don't be a stranger!"

Are you fucking kidding me? Why would I want to be your friend? Rather than saying that out loud, I just grunt and walk into the club...where the environment immediately changes upon my entrance.

Several ponies filter their way around me and out of the bar, while others remove themselves to the farthest corners of the room, where they whisper to one another and point hooves at me when they think I'm not looking.

"What? Don't let me ruin your night," I address the crowd sarcastically. I cast my gaze around, and I soon notice the pony described to me by Bon Bon and Lyra.

She's sitting behind a...suprisingly modern looking set of DJ tables. There's a decent set of speakers spread around the room too. Reverse engineered from human technology, if I had to take a guess.

The pony herself is pure white in color with two bridged eighth notes as that mark on her flank. Her mane and tail are a bright shade of electric blue, run through with streaks of an even lighter blue. The most distinguishable part of her appearance are the purple tinted sunglasses that she's wearing. So that's Vinyl.

She looks awestruck for a moment, but then, to my surprise, grins. She takes out the record on her table and replaces it with a new one. "Hey hey, we got a human in the house! Turn down the lights, because I'm about to throw down some fresh beats!" Vinyl's words break the awkward silence that had formed upon my entry. Everyone looks her way as she sets the needle on the record. Then she looks directly at me. "I learned this style from you guys! Do me a favor and rock out!"

Hold up, she learned what style from who now? My thoughts are interrupted as the music completely changes, the bass roaring and percussion reverberating through the room so intensely, that I can feel it in my chest. Is this...no way. Tell me you're kidding. Vinyl is playing dubstep. What the fuck I don't even...you know what. Fuck it. This is awesome.

The ponies are still in a state of shock at first, but after Vinyl's words and the intense new music, they slowly relax, and start mingling with one another again. The dance floor soon fills up again.

The scent in the air is predominately pony, of course, but the sights and sounds remind me very strongly of this one club, three thousand years ago.

* * *

_"I can't believe we're actually doing this," I grumbled as I followed Amaryllis through the club._

_ "What, too scared of being shown up on the dance floor?" she teased. I shook my head and didn't answer._

_ The music was loud and intense, such that the sound was pounding in my chest, a feeling that I loved, but not when around large groups of idiotic drunk people looking for a quick fuck._

_ I gaped at Amaryllis as she stepped out onto the dance floor and started rocking out to the beat. I had assumed she was kidding when she was talking about the dance floor. I thought we were here to let loose and laugh at all the stupid people._

_ "What the fuck, Amaryllis?!" I asked in disbelief. She laughs a bit and tries to get me to join her out there, but I resist her._

_ "Aw, come on, Seth! Lighten up a bit and come dance!" Amaryllis said, pouting a bit._

_ "Weren't you the strong silent type that didn't give a fuck about people? What's all this about?" I was starting to get angry. I had hoped that Amaryllis wasn't like the other college students, but there she is, dancing like she's drunk at a party. That's an exaggeration. She actually had some grace, but that wasn't the point._

_ "That's right! I don't give a fuck what people think of me. That's why I can do this. Just because I hate practically everyone doesn't mean I shouldn't have fun," Amaryllis shot back._

_ "That's not-"_

_ "The better question is, why aren't you dancing? Because if I didn't know better, I'd say you DO give a fuck about what these drunk idiots think." She did not just accuse me of that._

_ "You know what? Just for that, I'll show you how to REALLY dance," I declared, and I forced my way onto the dance floor. Amaryllis's smile widens, and the two of us start just enjoying one another's company. The people who knew us in the club gave us shocked looks, wondering if we were drunk or something._

_ One of the braver men attempted to get in on the dance with Amaryllis. She promptly kicked him in the balls and we kept dancing. Nope, we were still assholes. And I loved it._

* * *

Heh, look at me, feeling all nostalgic. You know...just once, I'll do this. This is something I can do to honor Amaryllis's memory.

I feel really stupid for even thinking about this, but it doesn't stop me from walking to the dance floor, ponies watching me curiously as I pass them. This is a really dumb idea, but you know what?

I don't give a fuck.

* * *

After the first song ended, I recline against a nearby wall. I hurt. I had made sure not to move all that much to keep from aggravating my wounds, so dancing was awkward. But I did it, and I feel a bit better mentally because of that.

I rest against that wall until the second song ends, and ponies start to leave for home. I can see Vinyl starting to pack up her records. I take this opportunity to approach her.

"Hey, dude! Pretty rad to see you dancing out there to my tunes. Did I get your music right?" Vinyl says to me conversationally when she notices my approach.

"You did. I didn't think I'd hear dubstep ever again," I reply honestly. I've always held a healthy respect for musicians. That hasn't changed. So yes, surprisingly enough, I respect this pony. Hopefully she doesn't piss me off later. "I'm Seth Rogers. Thanks for calming the crowd. I didn't want to have to fight off an bar owner who's angry that I scared off his customers."

"I hear that! It's a pleasure, Seth. You don't mind if I call you Seth, do you?" Vinyl responds with a laugh. When I shook my head, she continued. "Awright! Name's Vinyl Scratch. Put er' there, dude!"

She holds her hoof out, like for a handshake or something. Or hoofshake. Whatever. She's a musician, so I'll do it just for that reason. I reach out my hand, and she slaps my hand like in a high five, and then does a weird hoofshake. Uh...huh.

"Hey, I-" I begin, but Vinyl forestalls me words with a hoof. She's looking rather intently at my lower body. What the fuck...I swear to god, if she's checking me out, I'm running as FAR away from here as I can.

"I thought your dancing was a little shaky. You're hurt!" Vinyl gasps. Oh great...don't you go and feel pity for me.

"Ugh, don't worry about it. That's why I'm wearing bandages," I say, waving her concerns away.

"Dude, that looks like it hurts. I wish I could help," Vinyl responds with a sympathetic voice. "Anyway, why'd you come to this club, anyway?"

"I was actually looking for you. I was told you're looking for help with your equipment." Whether or not she's surprised by that, I can't tell because of those fucking sunglasses.

"That was quick! I literally just said that an hour ago," Vinyl proclaims with a grin. "Yeah, if you think you can handle it, what with all those cuts you've got, I'll hire you."

"I'll be fine. When do you usually have gigs?" I dismiss her concerns with a wave of my hand.

"Well, I generally have them three times a week, sometimes more if Pinkie Pie throws a party," Vinyl answers. That last name she mentioned...who the fuck is okay with having a name like that? Whatever, I don't care. "Tell you what. You got a place I can find you at?"

Shit. What do I say? I lied to Twilight, but only because she was going to offer me her place for tonight. I probably shouldn't lie to my future employer. "No, actually. I don't have any money. That's why I'm here."

"Whoa, really? That's not cool. Wait, were you gonna sleep outside tonight?" Vinyl questions me, a hint of suspicion in her voice. My face gives her all the answer she needs. "Come on, dude. You're a human. I bet you get get a room with royalty if you tried."

"I don't want royalty, and I certainly don't want your charity. I'll sleep outside until I get the money to find a hotel somewhere," I tell her firmly.

"Are you sure? I have a spare room I could-"

"No! I'm completely fine with the way things are." I think I may have let my voice rise a bit, because I see Vinyl's ears fold back.

"If you want to do this job, I have to be able to find you," she warns me.

"I remember seeing a park when I was on my way to the library. I'll be staying there if you want to find me." Well, that decision was rather quickly made, but it'll work. A patch of grass will work for tonight.

"All right, dude. Take tonight to heal up a bit more, and I'll come grab you to help me set up tomorrow night," Vinyl finally relents, though she doesn't look happy about it.

"Great, see you tomorrow," I say bluntly, and without another word, I turn on my heel and leave the club behind.

Fuck these ponies. They need to stop being so nice to me. I can tell what they're up to. They're just going to be nice until they can use it to get favors from me. I won't let it happen. I won't let you fuckers use me.

Somewhat angry, I storm down the street in the dark of night. It's already cold, but it's tolerable. When I reach the park, I gently lower myself to the nearest patch of grass until I'm laying on my back.

You know, since there's no real streetlights, I can see thousands of stars in the sky, something I'd never see back at my college.

I keep staring up at that night sky until at last, I fall asleep.

* * *

All right, this is my first experiment with the first of the mane six. Please let me know whether or not I've portrayed Twilight and Spike's characters well. It's something I'm paranoid about.

Also, Vinyl Scratch = so much win.


	5. Mind of a Troubled Human

I wake up feeling absolutely frigid. Yeah...I'm a bit of a deep sleeper, so I probably didn't feel it when the temperature dropped during the night.

It's not the cold temperature that woke me up, nor the sunlight peeking over the houses in the east. No, it's the feeling of somebody poking me gently with a hoof. Okay Seth...control yourself. Don't beat the ever loving daylights out of this hapless pony that thinks it's a good idea to poke a random stranger lying on the street.

"Mr. Seth? Are you okay?" a quiet voice calls to me. Huh, is it just me, or does that voice sound familiar? I open my eyes slowly to see a familiar sky blue pegasus gazing at me with worry in her eyes.

"Flitter? I _was _sleeping. Not anymore though, considering the hoof poking," I address her, my voice a bit snippy for having been woken up. I can see her recoil a bit at my words.

"Oh! I'm so sorry. I just thought you might be hurt since you were sleeping in the middle of the park," Flitter apologizes, blushing a little. "But...why did you spend the night out in the cold?"

"Because I like the cold," I respond sarcastically, and then I start to move. My joints ache from the cold, but a good stretch will take care of that. I stand up carefully, leaning most of my weight on my handy rifle.

Flitter watches me curiously as I stretch out my arms and legs. I notice that doing so doesn't hurt me all that much, unless I involve my side. That makes sense I guess. The gash on my side is the most serious of my injuries. The bandages on my shoulders and arms feel a bit loose too. I decide to take a risk and unravel them, knowing that I could just find a hospital if I need one.

I hear Flitter gasp when the various cuts I've accumulated on my upper body are revealed. Ignoring her, I inspect them for myself. The cuts on my shoulder are already scabbed over. Running a finger along them, they feel quite stable. I rotate my shoulder once to test how it feels. It stings a bit, but it's bearable. My guess is that I'll be healed in a day or two.

"You are hurt! What happened?" Flitter asks me. I hold up a finger to tell her to wait, and then I continue checking myself. The cuts on my arms are scabbed over as well, and the ones near my forearms are already peeling off, because they aren't that deep at all. No, it's the ones on my upper arms that'll probably heal around the same time as my shoulder.

"Eh, just some shit with a timberwolf," I finally answer her. Flitter looks even more worried, but I cut her off before she can say anything else. "Ugh, stop worrying. If I was in enough trouble to warrant a _pony _worrying about me, I'd be dead."

"Oh...okay. Anyway, I just wanted to make sure you were all right," Flitter continues weakly. She looks a little hurt at my harsh words. Damn, this pony needs to grow a skin. "It was nice seeing you, but I need to go. There's a storm scheduled for tonight, so I have to get ready."

"Yeah, alright, seeya," I say uncaringly, still testing the range of motion on my limbs. I look up as a rush of air washes over me, and I'm just in time to see Flitter taking off and soaring through the air. "Ponies with wings...that's just not fair. How come humans didn't evolve to get wings? Fuck you, evolution."

Now, what's on my list of things to do today? I need to see Twilight again, because I need to know a few things more about the pony race. Like, those marks. They kind of remind me of tramp stamps, but I doubt that's what they are. If they were, then I'm surrounded by pony prostitutes. That thought has me laughing a bit to myself. Wow, my humor is twisted. I try to picture Flitter with a sultry look on her face, and I just laugh harder, causing some of the other ponies passing near me to gaze at me oddly.

The other reason I need to see Twilight is because she may have found something on Sombra. The closer I get to finding that bastard, the better. I still don't know why he picked ME of all people to zap to the future. I'd rather have died in a zombie apocalypse with my family than die in a land of magical ponies, completely alone.

Next on my list, I need to find the farm, and see if they'll let me take a part time job there. Lastly, I need to find my way back here later tonight to meet Vinyl in time for a gig or something.

A rumbling in my stomach reminds me that I haven't had anything to eat since Zecora. I am starving as all hell. Where am I going to find food without any money? The answer is simple: I'm not. Looks like I'm going hungry another day. It's a pain, but there's no way around it.

I start walking back down the streets back towards Golden Oaks Library. You know, I think that if I asked, she wouldn't mind giving me food. No, that's a terrible idea. Then she'll have one more thing to hold over my head. No, I'll stay hungry.

When I knock on the door, this time Twilight answers it herself instead of Spike. When she sees me, she smiles brightly at me. "Seth! Welcome back. Come on in, I'll make some more tea," she greets me enthusiastically, and then she steps aside to give me room. I find it odd at how happy she looks to see me. Last time I was here, I punted your dragon. Why aren't you more wary?

"Awesome. Tea sounds good," I grunted.

"I'll get the water going," Spike says in a resigned manner, walking into view from the right side of the main room, and then disappearing into the kitchen.

"Thanks, Spike! Now, Seth, if you'll just...Seth! You're hurt!" Twilight cut off in the middle of her request to, just like every other pony, exclaim in horror at my injuries.

"You just noticed that? I was wearing these bandages yesterday," I point out. Twilight has the sense to look embarrassed at that.

"I...well...we don't know much about human fashion. I assumed it was just clothing," she protests weakly. I scoff at that. That's so fucking dumb.

"Whatever. Now can we get down to business? I actually have a full day today," I say, changing the subject. Twilight shakes her head emphatically.

"No. Absolutely not. Not until I can get you healed," she tells me sternly. I raise an eyebrow.

"Come on, Twilight. If it was possible to heal with magic, then why does this town have a hospital?" I question skeptically. As she answers, Twilight is rifling through her bookshelves, pulling stacks of them off with her magic and sifting through them in a very impressive fashion. I don't know what the average magical skill is of ponies, but I'd estimate that she's one of the stronger ones.

"That's because it's an extremely difficult spell. At the very most, I can only heal surface wounds. It's not healing per se, but more like aging. I can't do anything about illnesses, either," Twilight explains to me. Her brow is wrinkled in concentration. "Come on, where is it?"

I watch her curiously. If she can heal these wounds, I'd be glad to use that talent of hers for my benefit.

"Twilight, the water's done!" Spike calls from the kitchen.

"Aha!" Twilight exclaims, pulling down a book from the shelves. Then, as if she knew exactly where every book was supposed to go, she levitated the books she displaced back into the shelves in an organized manner. "Spike, could you finish it up for me?"

Spike gives a grunt of confirmation, but Twilight ignores him and moves over to me with an excited look on her face.

"Here's a better question. Why doesn't everyone go to you if they get hurt?" I inquire. If a human had that kind of ability, I would stake my life that he'd have a line the size of the Sears Tower outside of his house.

"Well...it's not something I advertise," Twilight admits with a blush. That sets off alarm bells in my head. I take a few steps back. "What are you doing?"

"Don't you even," I warn her, though she only looks more confused. "I know what you're up to, and I won't have it."

"What are you talking about? I just want to help," Twilight asks, stepping closer to me. I start backing towards the door.

"Yeah. There's a spell that only the strongest spellcasters can use that you've been keeping hidden, and you're willing to break it out for a complete stranger free of charge? I'm not stupid," I shoot back. I reach behind me and open the door, hoping to get away from this situation. "I won't be in your debt!"

Twilight's face is surprised at first, but then it turns to incredulous disbelief, like she was saying "really?" without words. Just as I'm about to leave, her horn glows, and I'm yanked back in the library without any means of stopping myself. The door shuts behind me.

"That's silly. You're being silly," she accuses me, using her magic to move me over to wall and then keep me there. I try to struggle, but it's pointless. I can feel my muscles straining, but they just won't move. "You're not a stranger. You're a friend who's hurt."

"What?!" I say incredulously. A friend? Are you fucking kidding me? I've done nothing but be an asshole to you since I got here for the very purpose of not making any friends. What in your tiny little head makes you think I want to be your friend? Why would you even want to be _my _friend? This is...I don't...how do I even respond? "You're insane."

"Not as insane as the one who would rather feel pain than get healed, just because of some silly pride," Twilight counters me. My mouth drops open in anger.

"What the...fuck you!" I yell, but Twilight's horn is already lighting up like a christmas tree. Despite how angry I am, I can't help but watch in awe as the scabs on my arms and shoulders start to glow. Then, it's like I'm watching a time lapse video. I can visibly see as new skin forms under each of the scabs, eventually forcing said scabs to fall off and disintegrate.

Twilight grunts in exertion, sweat beading on her brow, the spell clearly taking a lot out of her. The bandages around my side unravel themselves and fall to the floor. The gash in my side immediately starts to bleed, as it was not completely scabbed over yet. However, the blood soon stops and the wound completely scabs, and then a few seconds later the scab falls off and disappears, revealing fresh pink skin underneath it.

"There!" Twilight gasps, and she releases both spells, so that I can move again. In awe, I run a hand along the skin on my side. It feels a little raw, but it doesn't hurt anymore. Damn, that spell is useful. But that doesn't mean I've forgotten how Twilight essentially forced me into her debt. "That wasn't so bad, was it?"

"Bitch! Now you're just going to demand something ridiculous from me in the future because of this!" I snap at her angrily. Instead of being offended, Twilight just smiles.

"Thank you, but that's not necessary. It's just something I'd do for any of my friends," she expresses.

"What the...you don't make any sense," I groan, earning a giggle from the purple unicorn.

So now, utterly confused, I am standing against the wall, completely healed. I'm still a little angry from how she forced me to take her favor, and not at all convinced that she won't use it as leverage to get something from me later.

"Tea's done!" Spike calls from the kitchen. Twilight trots towards the kitchen, beckoning me back with a hoof. I follow her, feeling bitter.

Just like before, we sit down at her table, and she levitates the tea over to us. I set my rifle against the wall, and then I sip at the tea eagerly, as I certainly haven't had any water since getting here, and tea is essentially just flavored water.

"Hey, Seth," Spike addresses me for the first time since I got here. I still don't much care for him, so all I respond with is a grunt.

"I'll get right to the point. What have you found on Sombra?" I begin, cutting right to the heart of the matter. Twilight's face, once smiling and happy, falls immediately, and I let my face fall into my hands. "You didn't find anything."

"I went through almost half of my library last night, and I couldn't find even a single mention of this King Sombra," Twilight explains. "I'm sorry."

"And she didn't go to bed until past midnight," Spike adds. I can see Twilight wince as she looks at me, as if worried that I'm going to shout at her again. I won't lie, I'm tempted. It shouldn't be this hard.

"Fine. Just keep looking. There has to be something," I finally say. I take another gulp of her delicious fruity tea. "Anyway, I've been meaning to ask. What's up with those butt tattoos all you ponies seem to have?"

Twilight flushes crimson at my admittedly vulgar language. "They're not...butt tattoos. They're our cutie marks. Everypony has one to signify their special talent. Don't humans have them?"

My right eye is twitching. Cutie marks? Dear god, I'm dying a little inside just writing that word. "No, we don't. And I will never call them that. That has to be the dumbest sounding name I've ever heard," I answer her, sighing. This really is a dumb world I've landed in.

"If you don't get cutie marks, how do you know what your special talent is?" Twilight presses. I notice with some amusement that she's got a pad of paper and a quill on the table in front of her. She's taking notes?

"We don't. We have to find that out for ourselves. Seems like you ponies have it easy in that regard," I say, a little envious. I still don't know what my special talent is. Though I'm certainly glad I don't get a butt tattoo to tell me when I've found it.

"That seems difficult. Getting a cutie mark is difficult enough as it is," Twilight placates me. We're quiet for a bit as we take some time to drink our tea. Damn, I love this stuff. Wonder if I could get a few of those teabags for myself.

"Magic. Tell me more about it. Who can use it, how it's used, etcetera," I pose. Considering she's a libarian, I'm probably going to get a pretty long explanation. That suspicion deepens when her expression brightens.

"Oh, I have a lot to tell you about! My special talent is magic, after all," Twilight expresses, beaming.

"Here we go," Spike moans, but nobody pays him any attention. Instead, I'm interested in what Twilight can tell me about magic.

"Everypony in Equestria possesses some form of magic within themselves, no matter what race of pony they are. It's all a matter of how it's utilized in our biology. For example, pegasi use magic to fly by lowering the effects of gravity on their bodies," Twilight begins.

That actually makes sense if you think about it. It never made any sense how the pegasi could fly, because it seems to me like the average wingspan would have to be many times larger than it is to produce enough lift to propel that much weight off the ground. Reducing the acceleration of gravity on its body won't do anything except make it lighter. I assume reducing the mass of a pegasus will do something horrible to them. I'm no physicist, so all I know about the mass/volume ratio is that if it's messed up, shit hits the fan.

"Earth ponies possess a great deal of magic saturated into their very bones and muscle, making them physically stronger than the other races, as well as giving them an affinity for growing crops. All of Equestria is dependent on them for food," Twilight continues.

Extra strength. Useful, but I think I'd prefer to fly. Not saying that I want to be pony. Hell fucking no. Just stating a preference.

"Then, you have unicorns. We are the only race capable of manipulating the magic within our bodies, and channeling it through our horns. As for the change in composition of the magic as it leaves our body, I believe that it can best be expressed by the differing amounts in-"

"I get the point. If I wanted a lecture, I'd go back to college," I cut across her. Twilight pouts at being stopped in the middle of her lecture, while Spike stifles a laugh.

"I thought you wanted to know everything," she whined. She gives me probably the most perfect rendition of puppy dog eyes that I have ever seen. Granted, I never find that cute because I think puppies are fucking disgusting, but that is the saying. And I already mentioned these fucking ponies and their innate cuteness. So I think you know what happened next.

"Ugh, fine...proceed," I groan, mentally resigning myself. Twilight then grins happily, and the strangest thing happens. I swear to god, when she makes that smile, I hear a _sound. _The only way I can describe it...is that it sounded like "squee." What the fuck?

Seconds later, I'm knee deep in lecture. Twilight starts talking about the nuances and technical details of magic itself, boring me to high heaven because I can't understand a word of it. I try to look like I'm paying attention, but that doesn't last very long. Eventually, my eyelids droop.

* * *

"What do you mean, he's asleep?! SETH!" I'm suddenly awoken by Twilight yelling something in my face. My head lurches up off of my fist where it had been resting, and I look around frantically until I remember that I'm not in college, but in a magical land filled with unicorns and pegasi and whatnot. You know...the more I say that, the more I'm starting to become convinced that this is just one potent LSD trip or something.

"Your lecture was so boring he fell asleep!" Spike chokes out. He's rolling on the floor, laughing his head off at the situation he's observing. Twilight looks both irritated that I had slept through her entire lecture, and a little sheepish.

"So, you missed my thoughts on Starswirl the Bearded's Law on the Conservation of Magical Energy, and the varying theories on the effects of differing magical composition?" Twilight asks me with a sheepish smile. My blank expression was the only answer she needed. "Sorry, I probably shouldn't have trailed on like that."

"Nah, keep going. I was getting a pretty good rest there," I needle her with a grin, causing her to scoff and tap me lightly on my head with her notepad.

"So did you have any other questions?" Twilight says.

"Not really. You've answered what I want to know," I tell her, and then I drain the rest of my tea. "I have a lot to do, so I should probably get going."

Twilight's face falls, though I can't possibly imagine why. She should be glad that I'm leaving her house, since all I'm really doing is wasting her time and drinking her tea.

"Will you be back tomorrow?" she asks me hopefully as I stand up. I pause for a moment, wondering if I should.

"Probably," I answer casually. A sudden thought strikes me. I'm not wounded anymore. I grin and slip on my shirt for the first time since leaving the hut. Ah, I already feel warmer and better.

As I grab my rifle, I catch Twilight smiling at my response. Ugh, why does she look so happy? I'd get pissed if some asshole kept dropping by my place every morning.

"All right! I'll put it in my schedule. See you tomorrow!" she calls to me as I stalk out of the libary, shutting the door behind me.

Well, I'm back in this town whose name is so damn stupid I'll try never writing on paper. Time to find my way to the farm. I assume it's that giant apple farm I saw on the way down here from the Everfree, but it wouldn't help to make sure.

After accosting a random pony and asking for directions, I discover that I am indeed right in my assumption.

Ah, it feels really good to walk now that it doesn't hurt every time I move now. I honestly have no use for this rifle now, but I feel rather attached to it, ever since I used it to kill that Oppressed. I think I'll keep it around.

The walk through town is mostly uneventful, as least until I reach the path that heads to the outskirts of town, where the apple farm is. This town really is a nice place, all the ponies aside. I enjoy good architecture coupled with nature, and this town is just rural enough to fit that description.

I'm just walking down the path, looking around at the scenery, when I hear something above me. It sounds a bit like someone screaming. Well, less like screaming and more like...

"LOOK OUT BELOW!" a voice shouts frantically, getting louder and louder in volume. I look up in the direction of the voice, and then all I see is a flash of cyan, and then something slams right into my chest with enough force to knock me off my feet completely.

Me and whatever it was that hit me tumble end over end across the grass, limbs tangling together in a confusing and painful melee. A hoof smacks me in the nose, some hair gets in my mouth, and I think my back got scraped on a rock.

Finally, I end up flat on my back, staring up at the sky, with several pounds worth of pony stretched out across me. Of course, the pony on me starts struggling to get up immediately, and a hoof hits my chin painfully. "Fucking...get the hell off me!" I shouted, and then I promptly lift up my upper body, knocking the pony off of me.

I had though it was Flitter at first, but that was only because of the initial color I saw, and the fact that it was a pegasus. Turns out I was wrong. Way wrong. There's so much fucking color on this pony it practically hurts my eyes.

"All right all right, I'm sorry. Wish you hadn't been standing there." The pony has a rough, scratchy voice that right now sounds rather irritated.

The pony had a roundish jaw, so I'm assuming it's female. But her fucking color scheme is ridiculous. Get this. She has a cyan colored coat, and has a white cloud with a multicolored lightning bolt for her butt tattoo. That's where the normal ends. Her mane and tail are scruffy and untamed, and are colored every single color of the fucking rainbow.

"Sorry?! What is it with you fucking ponies and knocking me down all the time?" I snap viciously, leaping to my feet. "Do none of you watch where the hell you're going?!"

"Look, buddy, I said I was sorry. You don't have to be a jerk about it!" the other pony shoots back at me.

"No, fuck you! Do you know how fast you were going? What if my head had hit a rock?! I could have been killed!" I shout, stepping closer. The other pony looks like she's about to respond, but then my words hit home, and her eyes widen.

"Yeah...I guess you're right. I'm sorry," she apologizes, hanging her head a bit. I still don't want to accept it, but I've made my point. I can be satisfied with that for now. There's an awkward silence as I continue to glare at her. She awkwardly shuffles her hooves on the ground. "So...this probably isn't the best way to meet someone."

"You think?" is my cold response. I see her wince at that.

"Can we start over?" she suggests. Ugh, what a hassle. She looks like she won't let it go until I let her talk, so I give her an expectant look. It takes her a second before she realizes that I'm letting her go first. "So...my name's Rainbow Dash. I'm the fastest pegasus in Equestria!"

Oh...so she's one of _those. _An ego the size of Montana and not enough sense to match. I can already tell I'm going to hate this girl.

"Yeah, that's great. I'm Seth Rogers," I reply, and then I walk right past her in an attempt to leave this stupid situation behind. That doesn't work, because Rainbow falls into step right beside me.

"You're right, it really is great! There's no pony out there that can match me! Except for maybe the Wonderbolts, but that's because they're the best of the best!" she continues, her voice gaining a fangirlish tone near the end of her sentence.

"Uh-huh, I'm sure you're the greatest and all," I deadpan, honestly hoping she'll take the hint and get lost. Rainbow seems to pick up on my lack of enthusiasm.

"What, you don't believe me?" she asks with a grin, almost as if she's taking it as a challenge. I groan in irritation.

"There's a difference between not believing, and not caring," I tell her flatly. Huh, judging by the look on her face, I'd say I struck a nerve. Yup, I suspected as much. People with egos like her are hurt most when someone could really care less about their accomplishments. Score one for the human.

"...You're really kind of a jerk. What exactly are you, anyway?" Rainbow finally asks, looking at me bitterly.

"I am a human. I'm getting really sick and tired of having to explain it to every single person I meet!" I snap at her.

"You mean pony?"

"...Yes, I mean pony. Fuck this world..." I curse. Come to think of it, I'm not all that surprised that Rainbow doesn't know what I am. Mentions of my race seem to be most prevalent in literature, and Rainbow doesn't seem all that smart.

"Why are you headed to Applejack's, anyway?" Rainbow asks curiously, tilting her head to one side.

"For the love of god, can you just leave me alone already? All of you fucking ponies are just too damn nosy. When will you get it that I don't want your company!" I yell at her, losing my patience at last.

"Celestia forbid I try to be friendly with the new guy!. With that kind of attitude, I doubt even Pinkie will want to be your friend," Rainbow counters, making her the first pony here that has actually shouted back at me.

"You know what, I'm perfectly fine with that. I never asked for your friendship anyway. Now do me a favor and get lost," I shoot back coldly. Rainbow looks furious, but she does take to the air, hovering a few feet above me.

"You are such a jerk! Have fun being alone all the time!" she yells at me, and then she zooms away almost faster than I can see. Huh, guess there was some merit in her claims of being fast. Not that I actually care.

Well, now that that unwelcome interruption is out of the way, I can actually do what I came to do. I can already see most of the farm from here.

From here, I can see a large barn, colored stereotypically. You know, the whole red and white motif. It's located smack dab in the middle of a wide open plain. On the left, I can see carrot farms, interestingly enough. Good to know that this town isn't so stupid as to ONLY farm apples. Speaking of apples, I'm fucking hungry. I wonder if the barn's owner wouldn't mind if I had one. Or fourteen.

On the right, I see a chicken coop, as well as a line of smaller shacks, whose purpose I can't quite make out. Directly in front of me, there's a white fence with an archway, upon which is a sign emblazoned with the words "Sweet Apple Acres."

There's also another pony near the fence, hammering in nails with a hammer in its mouth. It's also a really tiny pony. Like, half the size of the ponies I've met before now. It's a pale yellow color, with a red mane and tail and a bow on its head. Surprising, I don't see a butt tattoo. That's a new one. Maybe Twilight can explain that one to me at one point.

It looks like an average worker, so I ignore it completely and attempt to walk through the archway. I don't get very far before the small pony exhibits the first sensible reaction towards me that I've seen so far.

It emits a very feminine screech of terror and fucking books it back towards, the barn, dropping the hammer on the ground in the process. Heh, it's about time I somebody acted with some sense around here.

Let's hope it doesn't come back to bite me. I catch sight of two more ponies emerging from the barn, followed by the smaller one, who's hiding behind the others. One of the new ponies is male and fucking massive, while the other is female.

The male is giant. I think I said that before, but let me reiterate that. He's fucking huge. Like, a hit from those back legs could probably crush my rib cage. Actually, he'd probably obliterate me, considering he doesn't have any wings or a horn, meaning he's a super strong earth pony. His fur is colored a deep red, and his mane and tail are orange and messy. There's a green apple on his ass, whatever that means.

The female look ridiculous. Everything about her screams "I'm an apple farmer!" I've heard of dressing for the job, but being your job? That starts to make me wonder whether or not a pony's talent is determined at birth.

Anyway, her fur is orange, and her mane and tail are blonde and tied at the ends. There's a couple of apples on her ass, and hilariously enough, she's wearing a stetson hat on her head.

I can't help it. I have to laugh. She thinks she's people. Nobody but a human can pull a hat like that off. And not even we do it well. You know what? Hats are just fucking stupid. Even in my era, humans that run around wearing fedoras, backwards baseball caps, or leather hats just look like douchebags, and not fashionable. On women, it's unattractive as all hell. Excuse me, hair on a woman is half the appeal, so if you cover it up, I already halfway hate the way you look.

Descriptions aside, they really don't look happy to see me. The way those two ponies are standing clearly indicates aggression. As sensible as they are being, this is going to be one hell of a hassle. Time to show these ponies I'm not to be trifled with.

I walk through the archway, hefting my rifle over my shoulder. Sometimes I really wish this thing had a knife on the end of it. Or better yet, bottomless clip. I feel like I'd continuously run around with my hand on the trigger if that was the case.

"This is the monster you were talkin' 'bout, Apple Bloom?" the female asks in a very country accent. I notice she has a lasso coiled around one of her hooves.

"Yea, that's it allraht!" the smaller pony squeaks. Her voice has a twang to it too, and it's more high pitched than the other. I think she may be a child. Dammit, I hate children.

"Gimme jus' one second. Ah'll take care of it," the hat wearing pony declares, and she uncoils the rope around her hoof and starts twirling it in the air masterfully. I should probably say something now unless I want to end up all trussed up.

"Sis, ah think that's a-" the male begins in a deeper voice, but I'm already talking.

"I'd rather you not do that. Don't you ponies have rules against binding intelligent animals?" I express. The fact that I have the ability to speak causes the rope swinging pony to lower the rope in shock.

"You kin talk?" she splutters. Apple Bloom, if that's the foal's name, is now staring out from behind the orange pony's leg with wonder in her large eyes.

"O' course, he's a-" the male starts again.

"No, I actually can't. What you're hearing right now is a complete figment of your imagination," I deadpan, wondering why in the hell all of these fucking ponies have to be so stupid.

The orange pony adopts a sheepish expression at my sarcastic quip, while Apple Bloom actually giggles. Damn foal.

"Ah'm sorry 'bout tha rude welcomin'. If ah'd have known you were intelligent, ah wouldn't a' jumped ta conclusions," the orange pony apologizes.

"Ah knew he was intelligent," the male attempts to interject, but nobody pays him any attention as the orange pony walks up to me and offers a hoof to me in reconciliation. I glance at it warily. I'd rather not take it, but it's necessary to have a professional relationship with a potential employer.

I reach out tentatively and grasp her hoof with my right hand...which she immediately grips somehow and starts shaking enthusiastically. God, for a pony, she has a crazy strong grip. I can feel that earth pony strength already.

"It's a pleasure making' yer acquaintance, sir. Ah'm Applejack. Welcome ta Sweet Apple Acres! It's always nice ta sea new face aroun' here!" She introduces herself enthusiastically, making me feel somewhat uncomfortable with how friendly she's being. Whenever I'd introduce myself to a human, I usually get this face that says, "why the fuck are you talking to me?", and an attitude to match. That always kills any kind of joy I get out of meeting new people. It happened so much, I just don't care to meet new people anymore. So how the fuck do I react to such a change in demeanor? Are ponies just fucking crazy?

"Sure, I guess. I'm Seth Rogers," I stammer a bit, still caught off guard. Finally releasing my hand, Applejack points her hoof at the other two ponies.

"This little one here is mah sis, Apple Bloom," she begins, indicating the smaller one. Just as I expected.

"I am NOT little!"

"An' this pony here is mah brother, Big McIntosh," she continues, while I eye the red one, still a bit cautious of all that power I can see in his bulging muscles. Then, Applejack looks back at me and gives a friendly smile. "So what kin ah do ya for?"

...

...

...

Mind, get out of the gutter. Mind, get out of the gutter.

"I actually came here looking for work. I'm flat broke," I say honestly. Applejack brightens at that.

"Wait jus' one moment!" she orders me, and then she gallops back into the barn. Only moments later, she returns harnessed to a cart filled with empty baskets stacked atop one another. She gestures with a hoof to follow her.

"That's right convenient. Why, ah was jus' mentionin' ta Granny Smith how we was runnin' out o' time before the first snow," she responds happily, walking away from the barn and towards the wide field of apple trees that I had remembered seeing. Just before we left the area, Applejack turns back to her family. "Apple Bloom, would you mind finishin' that fence? Oh, an' Big Mac, there's some chores 'round the barn that need doin'."

I watch the other two make varying sounds of acknowledgement before they disperse to do what they were told. Seems like Applejack calls the shots around here. I don't know who this Granny Smith pony she mentioned, but I get the feeling it'll be a green pony who's old. Come on, this world is ridiculous, but I doubt it would have a pun like that.

"You any good at applebuckin'?" Applejack suddenly queries as we walk into the field of apple trees. I raise an eyebrow at that.

"Applebucking?" I repeat, unfamiliar with the term. Applejack nods. When we reach the first tree that still has apples in it, she unbuckles herself from the cart and trots over to it. God, she looks ridiculous in that hat.

She turns to face me. "Mind placin' some o' those baskets for me?" she asks, though in my mind it's not really a question. This is essentially my first day on the job, so her every wish is my command, as cliche as that sounds.

The baskets are bulky, but not heavy at all. Since I'm fully healed, lifting two or three of them at a time is no problem. With her hoof, Applejack indicates several specific spots for me to place a basket. I mean, very specific.

"Place 'er right there. A mite left. Up a bit. Nah, I mean up from mah view. Right a bit. Ah, it's too far right now." My patience was getting very thin, but I've been in jobs with micro-managing bosses like this, and the only way to deal with it is to just keep quiet and do what you're told. So I do my best to follow her every command.

"Right, that looks good. Now step back," Applejack warns me. I do as I'm told, giving her plenty of room. Then, with a grunt of exertion, she slams her back two hooves into the trunk of the tree. My jaw drops when I see the entire tree visibly shake without enough force to dislodge each and every apple in the tree.

My awe only grows as I see the apples fall in disorganized clumps, but there's a basket in all the areas where the apples fall in highest concentration, such that every basket I placed is filled to the brim, with only one or two apples hitting the ground.

But...that's...what? Applejack had me do all those directions because she just knew where each apple was going to fall? But, this was a random tree. It's impossible for her to know exactly where they're going to fall unless she knew the tree well. But since I didn't see her plan this, does that mean she knows every tree in such intimate detail that she can predict where and how the apples will fall? Goddamn, that takes an incredible memory.

"So, ya think you kin do that?" Applejack asks me with honest curiosity. I notice that she's not even breathing hard from that. Fuck, these earth ponies are ridiculously strong.

"Yeah...nope. No way in hell," I confess. "I'm just not strong enough to pull off a feat like that."

I recoil a bit as I notice Applejack inspecting my leg muscles too closely for my liking. I have no idea what the social norms for ponies are, but a human would usually freak the fuck out if another human started staring at their legs. In some circles, that's considered creepy.

"Yeah, don't take this the wrong way, but yer right. Yer back leg muscles aren't as big as yer arm muscles," Applejack observes. "But ah'm sure ah kin think of a way ta use ya."

Too late. I've already thought of a way while you're busy telling me things I already know. While she had been talking, I had walked over to one of the full baskets and lifted it carefully, making sure not to spill any of the apples. Applejack watches me curiously as I carry the basket over to the cart and hoist it up onto it.

"That's a real good idea, Mr. Rogers! Ah reckon that'll make this job quicker if we got two o' us doin' this," she praises me. Yeah...real smart of me. No, you're just a little bit slow, that's all. Why does nobody here use their damn heads?

"Call me Seth," is the only thing I say in response, as I'm busy hoisting the other baskets onto the cart. Applejack smiles, probably thinking that I'm allowing her to act more casually with me. No...Mr. Rogers just reminds me of my dad. Who's currently long dead and decomposed. Or worse, he became an Oppressed. Heh, and now I'm slightly more depressed than usual. Thank you, King Jackass, for ruining my life.

"All raht, then. Now if y'all follow me, we got a lot o' applebucking to do," Applejack says enthusiastically. I swear to god, if she says something like git 'er done, I'm going to- "Let's git 'er done! Yeehaw!"

My face falls into my palm.

* * *

This chapter was fun to write, as I got to include three of the mane six. I don't want to be like some other HiE stories I've read, where the introduction to the mane six is rushed, so I'm taking my time with all of them.

I'm concerned on how well I did on characterizing Rainbow, Twilight, and Applejack, so if it's not too much trouble, please leave a comment telling me how I did.


	6. Working Class Hero

I am so...goddamn...tired. I've never had to work this hard in my life. I've had a job before, but it's always been bagging at a grocery store or working in food services. It was difficult, but it never hurt as much as all this heavy lifting does. The only positive thing I can say is that the weather was nice and chilly, so I never down in my own sweat.

Anyhow, I should probably detail how things went. Applejack isn't a bad taskmaster, which I can be glad for. We started out doing much of teh same. I would place baskets for her according to her exact instructions, and then I would carry them to the cart once they were full.

The only issue that I found distasteful was when she tried to talk to me during all of this.

Ever since we started working, I'd let her do most of the talking, telling me what to do for most of the afternoon. It seems she wasn't content with just that, however, because when the sun passed its zenith, she attempted to strike up a conversation. Here's how it went.

"How are ya likin' Ponyville so far?" Applejack asks me just after I plunk a particularly heavy basket onto the cart.

"Everybody...here...is crazy," I say honestly, panting hard. I reach up with a hand and wipe away the sweat on my brow. I can't rest yet. There's more baskets to carry. I pass by Applejack as she hoists a basket of her own onto the cart.

"Ah take it ya met Pinkie Pie?" she asks me wryly, chuckling a bit at my description.

"Hell if I know," I respond, lifting another basket. How many damn apples are left? One quick glance shows me a huge amount of full apple trees left to harvest. I have to physically try not to groan. "You're...the second one to mention Pinkie. Who the hell is she?"

"She's Ponyville's resident party pony. Ya can't miss her. Braht pink coat, frizzy mane, balloons fer a cutie mark. Ring any bells?" Applejack describes. It does ring some bells, and it's not a happy memory.

"Oh...that bitch who nearly ran over me," I grunt, remembering the pink pony that wouldn't shut the fuck up after she nearly reopened my wounds. Applejack raises an eyebrow at how irritated I sound.

"Ya shouldn't be so hard on her. She takes some gettin' used to, but she's a real good friend to have," she admonished me, moving back to the cart.

"I'll take your word for it," I remark. Together, the two of us move the cart to the next tree.

"Alraht, if ya'll place them baskets here, here, and there." With Applejack's instruction, I place the baskets in seemingly random spots around the next tree. "What about you, Seth? Huh!" With that last exclamation, Applejack slams her back hooves into the tree, and the apples fall into the baskets. "You made any friends since coming to Ponyville?"

"Not really," I reply truthfully. I didn't consider any of these ponies friends. Granted, it took me at least a month before I considered Amaryllis a friend. Despite that, I don't want any friends here. Sombra showed me just how easy it is to lose them all.

"That's a raht shame, it is. Ya seem like a decent enough sort," Applejack affirmed, lifting one of the baskets. I grab another at the same time. I can't help but give a chuckle at her words. "What's so funny?"

"You clearly don't know me very well then," I asserted, and then slid the full basket onto the cart with a grunt. Applejack did the same not long afterwards. While still doing our work, we continued to have this mostly one sided conversation.

"Ah'd like to. Tell me a bit about yerself, Seth." Huh. Now that's certainly a straightforward way of asking. Of course, it gives me an easy way out of it too.

"No thanks," I tell her, focusing on my work and not looking at her. Applejack looks taken aback.

"Wha? Why not?" she asks, nonplussed.

"You're my boss, and I'm your employee. Let's leave it at that," I say bluntly. Applejack gazes at me for a long while, a sad frown crossing her face. Unfortunately for me, I miss the devious look that crosses her face a second later.

"Okay." That response causes to look at her suspiciously. She's not looking at me, instead focusing on her work. That's odd...she gave up way too easily. Twilight practically forced her "I'M YOUR FRIEND" spheal in my face, and Applejack just says "okay?"

Why do I get the idea she's planning something?

Finally, as the sun begins its descent towards the horizon, Applejack decides it's time to call it a day. Thank god. I feel like I'm dying. It doesn't help that my stomach feels like it's trying to eat itself at this point.

"Ya did good today, Seth," Applejack praises me as we haul the cart back to the barn, filled to the brim with apple baskets. I only have the strength to grunt in response. This earns a hearty chuckle from her. "Bet it was harder work than ya expected."

"No...I knew...it was going...to be hell..." I moan , slouching even as I walk. It hurts to walk...ugh...life in Ponyville is going to suck if I have to do this every day.

"Ah reckon ya'll git a lot stronger by the end o' harvest season," Applejack claims as she looks at my muscles. "All this excercise'll do ya good."

I say nothing to that, but she's got a point. I guess if I keep working here, I'll finally get that muscle mass I've always wanted. You see, after watching animes like Dragon Ball and Fairy Tail, I wanted to get ripped like they do, but I was always just too lazy to keep to a workout schedule. Of course, now that I have to excercise or starve, maybe I'll get a six pack. Who knows.

We push the cart into the barn together, and I get my first look inside it...and it's empty. I'm not even kidding. There's a large expanse of hay stretching out before me, with a loft on the other end and a few areas on either side separated by wooden partitions. At the other end of the barn is where several tools and other utilities are stored, like more carts.

"Let's jus' git it up agains' this wall," Applejack grunts, and the two of us move the cart up to the area she had indicated. I release it with a grunt and collapse against the wall, my back resting against it. Applejack chuckles a bit at how pitiful I must look. Dammit...I wish I could quit, but I need the money. Speaking of which, I wonder how much I'm getting paid for this.

"Raht! That takes care o' that. Care ta step inside ma house while I git yer pay?" Applejack offers. I shrug and fall into step beside her as she walks towards a door in the back left corner of the barn. I might as well. Better than standing out in the cold.

When we step inside, I take a quick look around. It's a rectangular room, with paintings lining the walls and a few windows gazing out over the farm. There's an orange rung on the ground as well. I also spot a door on my left that leads into a decently sized kitchen, from which I can smell a hint of something fucking amazing. Oooh...they're cooking food...I'm so fucking hungry.

In front of me, near the rug, Big McIntosh and Applebloom are playing together in an adorable fashion. She keeps trying to climb all the way up to his head, but he keeps her from reaching it by grabbing her with his forelegs and tickling her senseless. I can't help but smile a bit at the clear display of sibling love. It reminds me of my own brother.

* * *

_I was sitting on the leather couch in my parent's house, when my parents were out. My brother, Adam, was beside me. Our eyes were riveted on the plasma screen television that spanned the back wall of the room, where one of the final episodes of Soul Eater was playing._

_ The two of us were on the edge of our seats, our breath coming quickly, as we were completely immersed in the events unrolling before us. Our jaws dropped as the character on the screen grew to a plane of heightened power we'd never seen from him before. Was he going to do it? Was he going to finish off the enemy once and for all?_

_ We both groaned when the scene changes to the point of view of characters away from what seemed to be the final battle, and it wasn't long before the episode ended._

_ "Damn...that was awesome!" Adam gasped, turning to face me. "Hurry, put the next one on!"_

_ "You know, maybe you should do it this time. I'm feeling a bit lazy," I said, though the real reason was because I was immersed, and I didn't want to get up, lest I lose the sensation. _

_ "Nuh-uh, Mr. Anime. This is your show, remember? I just happen to think it's so awesome and sit with you while you watch it," Adam pointed out._

_ "Hm, then maybe I'll decide to stop for today," I needled him, turning my nose up at him and pretending to look serious. Adam scoffed incredulously._

_ "Seriously? You're really going to pull that card on me? You're going to stop right here, just before the final episode? You're evil dude," he countered with a grin. Then something occured to him. "You know, you're basically Asura."_

_ My grin soon mirrors him, and then I stand up, grabbing a blanket and wrapping it around my neck, such that it served as a makeshift cloak. I then wrapped a scarf around my face, leaving a tiny gap for my eyes. In a really cheesy villain voice, I quoted, "What you offer is order and authority, which gives humans the illusion of security and peace, but what truly lies under the thin layer of rationality you attempt to impose on the world?" _

_ Adam laughed rambunctiously at the admittedly hilarious spectacle. From the kitchen counter nearby, my brother grabbed two stacks of red plastic solo cups, shoved his fists into them, and then shouted at the top of his lungs, "SANZU DEATH CANNON!" _

_ I laughed myself when he thrust the stacks of cups at me. I swiped my hand to the side, and the cups went everywhere, bouncing off of the furniture and the floor with a cacaphonous clattering sound. "Your attacks are nothing to me! I will bring this world to its knees!"_

_ "Not if I can stop you!" Adam yelled comically, and then threw himself at me. He tackled me to the ground, and then the both of us start wrestling across the carpet, laughing and spouting serious quotes from the show._

_ "Kishin Hunter!"_

_ "Tsubaki: Fey Blade mode!"_

_ "Death Cannon!"_

_ "Vector Arrow!"_

_ My brother was always stronger than me, so he easily pinned me down until I admitted his victory. "No! I am the Demon God Asura! I cannot be defeated!" I yell in mock anguish. Adam repeatedly thrusts his arms up into the air, humming the Final Fantasy Victory Fanfare. I shove him over before he can finish it, knocking him onto the couch. "Back attack!"_

_ "Ah, dick move, bro!" Adam said, chuckling as he rose from the couch. "But I won, so put on the next episode."_

_ "Fair enough."_

* * *

Those were better times. I realize I've been watching them play for a while with that dumb smile on my face. I look and see that Applejack had been looking at me, smiling at something. Shit, she saw that didn't she?

The smile drops from my face. "What?" I ask, irritated. I hope she doesn't think that I want to be friends just because I remember my brother fondly.

"Nuthin," Applejack replies, her smile turning a little smug. Shit...she did see. Well, guess I gotta be a little colder than usual to convince her it was a fluke. Even though it wasn't. Goddammit. "Ah'm gonna grab yer pay. One sec."

I recline against the wall as Applejack heads upstairs to wherever she keeps her money.

Suddenly, I notice a lime green pony resting in a rocking chair on the other side of the room from where Big Mac and Apple Bloom are playing. She looks extremely old, as her mane is all scraggly and white, and she's got these deep wrinkles. I don't know how long ponies live in this world, so I can't make a guess as to how old she is. Let me guess, that's Granny Smith. What a cruel pun. Ugh.

Anyhow, she looks fast asleep. So I have to sit here bored for a while, because Big Mac and Apple Bloom aren't paying much attention to me. Not that I'd want them to.

Applejack soon returns with a jingling sack of what I hope is a lot of money. "There ya go, sir!" she tells me enthusiastically, handing me the sack. I take it gratefully, as this is essentially my food money.

"Thanks for the pay," I answer her. I turn around and head towards the door that leads outside.

"Hey, Seth?" Applejack speaks up suddenly. I pause and give her a look. "Why don't ya stay fer dinner tonight?"

"...Why would I do that?" I ask, raising my eyebrow. Strangely enough, Applejack doesn't look offended by the question.

"So ya could eat, o' course," she says with a smirk. You know, considering how hungry I am, I almost accept, but then I'd be in her debt. There's no fucking way.

"Sorry, but no," I tell her flatly. Applejack nods her head understandingly, irritatingly enough. Why are you being so...so...understanding? I don't know how to deal with this! Dammit, I'm basically Crona.

I turn back around and head for the door. "Can ah 'spect ya tomorrow?" Applejack asks.

"Probably," is my terse reply.

"It was nice meetin' ya!" Apple Bloom calls when she breaks free of her brother, and she waves a hoof at me. You know, for a kid, she's relatively well behaved. That's surprising. I'm so used to humans and their shitty parenting skills.

"Sure," I say uncomfortably, and then I exit through the door, shutting it behind me. I guess Applejack isn't that bad, compared to everyone else.

I immediately wish I was back inside. It's getting colder out here. Unless I get a room tonight, I'm going to die of hypothermia or something, what with the storm and all. Speaking of which, I look up into the sky. Sure enough, I can see clouds sweeping in from the east. My eyes widen in shock as I notice one key detail. The clouds aren't moving on their own. Yeah, this'll sound fucking unbelievable, but I can see pegasi weaving in and out of the towering thunderhead, actually grabbing onto wisps of cloud with their hooves and pushing it slowly across the sky.

I fall on my ass, completely struck speechless by the absurdity of what I was seeing. Ponies...control the fucking weather? How...I'm still in the same timeline with them, right? So why can't the clouds control themselves? Better question, what kind of pony in their right mind would create a storm that size? Are ponies gods? What the fuck...well, I've guess I've got something else to ask Twilight in the morning.

Anyhow, first things first. I stand back up, endeavoring to not look at the sky. I open the sack of money that I earned to see six small, round coins that were colored a shining gold. I reach in and touch one, and the metal is actually quite soft. Holy shit, is that actual gold?! I attempt to scratch it, but find that I can't. Huh, so it's either a gold substitute, or a gold alloy. The latter makes more sense, because we thought up the same idea back in our past.

Time to find out exactly how much these are worth. I set off back down the path towards the town proper. I have to get something to eat, and then I'll meet Vinyl at the park. Tonight should be a great way to relax and blow off steam once I get everything set up for her gig. I'm not hurt, so I should be able to dance a lot easier than before. I'm actually looking forward to it. God knows I'd go crazy if I didn't have something like that as an outlet for all this stress I've got.

Outlet...that reminds me. Shit, I completely forgot about my phone. I take it out of my pocket and unlock the screen. Thankfully, it's not dead yet. It looks like I've got around sixty percent battery. Before turning it off to save battery, I open my image folder. The last image is of Amaryllis and I at a formal dance at our college. She had been dressed in a stunning black dress that framed her form well, and the edges of her hair had been curled in such a way that it had made her look simply gorgeous. Me, I was just wearing a run of the mill suit. But we both looked happy, and it made me smile a little. God, I miss her so fucking much.

It feels like a little piece of me dies as well when I power the phone off, Amaryllis's face fading away into memory.

I continue on into the town square, deciding to take the direct route this time. I look up at the town hall, liking the way it looked. Of course, I can still notice the ponies staring at me with my peripheral vision.

There are some stalls set up around the perimeter of the square, selling all sorts of things. Thankfully, I notice one that sells what looks to be vegetables. I may not be able to make a salad, but I can certainly snack on some raw carrots or celery. I approach the stall.

"Hello there, and welcome to Golden Harvest Vegetables! What can I...um...what..." the goldenrod mare begins, but trails off with a gulp as I walk close enough for her to make out what I look like. "Uh...hi."

"That your...usual greeting?" I can't help but say. I'm getting really annoyed with all these ponies acting so differently around me. I actually miss the crowds of humans. At least there, no one would give me a second look.

"Um...sorry sir...I...well...you just...you're a..." the mare attempts to word, but she seems to be too intimidated by how much larger I am than she is.

"Human? Yes, yes I am. And no, I'm not going to hurt you. I'm hungry, so can we hurry this up?" I finish for her, and then answer the subsequent question that she may or may not have been thinking. The mare blinks, and then she attempts to compose herslef.

"Oh...okay. Well. In that case, let me try again," she stammers. Then, she clears her throat and says in a more confident voice, "Hello there, and welcome to Golden Harvest Vegetables! My name is Carrot Top! What can I get for you today, sir?"

One thing I can say for these ponies is that most of them give me some manner of respect. I like that. It's better than people just randomly talking to me and expecting me to answer.

"Hm...can you tell me how much twelve of those carrots and three celery sticks would cost?" I ask. Carrot Top appears to think for a moment before replying.

"For the lot? I'd say that would be around four bits. Is that acceptable sir?" she tells me. I frown a bit. Four bits? If I assume that one coin is a bit, then that's most of my money already. I wonder...

I kneel down so that I'm on her level, staring at her directly into her eyes. She looks a little unnerved by this, but seems to calm down after I give her my best friendly smile. "How about I drop it down to twelve carrots and two celery sticks? Do you think I could get that for three?" I've never actually haggled before, so I may end up looking like a total idiot, but it's worth a shot.

"Um...I guess I _have _made a few more sales today than usual," Carrot Top muses. Wait, is this actually working? Was it the way I dropped down a stick? It can't because I smiled, of course. That would just be dumb.

Carrot Top smiles brightly. "I think I can do that. Here you go, sir!" she says happily, wrapping my order in a bag. I fish out three bits and hand them to her, which she somehow takes with her hoof. Still have no idea how they grab anything with hooves.

"Thanks," I murmur, and then I take a monstrous bite out of the first carrot. Oh dear god...this has to be the best fucking carrot I've ever tasted. Maybe that's because of how hungry I am. Whatever. All I know is that it tastes like pure heaven in my mouth.

"You're welcome sir. Please enjoy, and have a nice evening!" Carrot Top calls after me as I walk away, munching on the carrot like no tomorrow.

Honestly, I have no idea where I'm walking. If there's any way to describe the situation I'm in now, it's by this one little nonsensical statement: Om nom motherfucking nom. It's a good thing that these aren't those measly tiny carrots that you get in grocery stories. No, these are those fucking giant ones that you usually chop up and put in a stew. Nope. I'm eating them all as they are right now.

I finall reach a street corner. There's a bench nearby, so I sit down on it. That way I can focus entirely on eating, and less on walking.

And that's how I spend the rest of somewhere around ten minutes. When I at last eat the last celery stick, I sit back with a satisfied sigh, feeling comfortably full for the first time since leaving the Everfree.

Taking a look around, I realize I'm near the park I'm trying to get to, except on the other side from where I told Vinyl I'd be. I stand up and start moving, feeling more energetic than ever. Life still sucks, but at least I feel ready to handle it.

There are still a few ponies around the park, laughing and playing around, despite the fact that they're probably adults. It's odd how carefree some of these ponies are. It's like they've never known real hardship in their lives. I envy them.

Then I wonder something. What exactly are the royalty doing to keep the country from knowing exactly how hard life is? Because whatever they're doing, I feel like our current president could learn a thing or two. Well, if he was still alive that is. Which he's not. Fucking Sombra and his Oppressed.

When I reach the other side of the park, I notice that Vinyl isn't here yet. Good, that'll give me time to relax. I settle down on the grass, gazing up at the sky. The clouds are getting closer, and the wind is picking up, ruffling my long hair.

Shit. I just realized that ponies will have no idea how to cut human hair. So my hair, which is shoulder length right now, is just going to keep getting longer. Well, fuck. Looks like I'm learning to cut my own hair.

"Hey yo! Seth!" I know that voice. Lifting up my head, I spot Vinyl Scratch trotting across the street towards me, her sunglasses reflecting the remaining light of the sunset. I lift a hand and wave in acknowledgement. "S'up! I haven't seen ya since yesterday. How's it hanging?"

"Well enough, I suppose. Worked my ass off at Sweet Apple Acres," I grunt, keeping a respectful tone. Vinyl's technically my boss too, as well as a musician.

"Nice, dude. Applejack'll treat ya well there. You coming? I got a sweet gig set up at Sugarcube Corner tonight!" Vinyl responds, coming to a stop right by my side.

"Yeah, I'm coming," I reply. Just as I'm about to get up, Vinyl offers me a hoof. Damn you for being my boss. I take it, and she helps me stand back up.

"Awesome. Let's go," Vinyl says, grinning. I grab my rifle and we start moving to who knows where. I don't know what Sugarcube Corner, but it's really starting to make me crave something sweet. But I've already spent enough money today. Chances are, three bits won't get me a hotel room. Guess I'm going to get wet tonight. Maybe electrocuted too, since that's a thunderstorm. That would make living here easier. You know, since I'd be dead. Totally kidding by the way. That's the coward's way out.

"By the way, what's up with that piece of metal you keep lugging around?" Vinyl inquires, snapping me back out of my thoughts. Huh. She's probably the first one to ask about my rifle.

"It's essentially a glorified walking stick," I admit. It really doesn't have any purpose at this point. "I'm mostly holding onto it for sentimental reasons."

"Heck, I'll get you a strap for it then," Vinyl suggests, smiling at my words. I shook my head.

"No, I'd rather you not do me any favors," I asserted. I already fucked up by letting Twilight help me out. Sorry Vinyl, I won't be in anyone else's debt.

"Oh, don't be stupid. I literally have an old guitar strap from when my buddy Ember used to live with me. I was going to throw it away," Vinyl presses.

"Yeah, but-" I begin, but Vinyl cuts across me.

"I'm your boss, right?" she points out with a knowing grin. Oh, she is _not _pulling this card.

"...yes."

"Then I order you to take the strap," Vinyl says with finality, her grin turning smug. She did just play that card. You...you...fine. Well played.

"Fine," I mutter, a little bitter. Vinyl smirks, her victory assured. Bitch, I'll remember this.

Vinyl leads me down various streets, her pace quickening as the wind gets stronger. "Shoot, we need to hurry, bro. It'll be a pain if it starts raining while we're trying to unload the cart," she says worriedly.

Eventually, we reach a small house that has a wooden ramp set up to the front door. That must be so we can get the cart out easily. "Come on in. This is my pad," Vinyl tells me, opening the door with her magic, which glows an electric blue, like her mane. I reluctantly follow her inside. When I try to look around, she jabs me lightly with a hoof. "Sightsee later. We got a storm to beat."

Dammit she has a point. Thankfully, she's got the cart set up with all of the equipment in it already. I can see lots of mechanical equipment inside, along with several cartons marked with Equestrian, which I can't read because several years of learning the alphabet is now fucking useless.

Without waiting for direction, I grab onto the bar and pull the cart towards the door. Vinyl is helping me as well, so it isn't long before we get the cart through the doorway. It takes a bit of strength to keep it from rolling down the ramp, but soon we've got it on the ground and ready to roll.

"Just push from the back and follow my lead!" Vinyl commands, raising her voice a bit over the intensifying wind. I don't reply, instead moving around to the back of the cart like I was ordered and pushing.

I have no idea where we're going. The only reason I know that we're evenchaging direction is because I can feel the cart jerking in a different direction, and I have to angle my body so that I can push in that direction as well. This happens several more times before we reach what I assume to be our destination.

I step out from behind the cart, look at the building, and my right eye immediately begins to twitch. The thing is shaped like a fucking gingerbread house. I'm not even kidding. It looks like I can just chomp on the fucking roof and have it taste like chocolate. Speaking of chocolate, my sweet tooth is acting up again. Yeah. This building makes me crave chocolate.

The door to the building slams open, and a familiar, hated voice sounds out. "Oh hello Vinyl! Hurry up and come in, we don't have much time before the Cakes get here, and it would be just terrible if weren't ready in time!" It's that pink pony I met earlier, with that overly high pitched voice. I think I'm already starting to get a headache. It's a good thing I'm hidden behind the cart. I'll have a few seconds to prepare myself mentally before having to talk to that menace.

"You got it, Pinks. You got the ramp set up to get this baby inside?" Vinyl questions, pulling the cart a bit closer to the door.

"Yes indeed-y! Roll 'er up! I'm just about done baking this super duper incredible cake!" Pinkie exclaims happily, and then I hear something bouncing away. What the fuck is up with that pink...thing?

"All right, dude, let's get inside before it starts pouring on us," Vinyl says, pulling the cart. I push on the end, and I feel it rolling up a ramp and inside the building. The moment we step inside, a thunderclap sounds in the heavens, and the first drops of rain start to fall. "That was close."

The first thing to assault my senses is the smell of chocolate and candy. Goddamn, that smells fucking amazing. I wonder if there will be free food at this thing. That would make my night.

Stepping out from behind the cart, I look around the inside of teh building. It's like I've stepped into a birthday party for a five year old. The candy themed decorations aside, there are streamers and balloons everywhere, along with a banner that says, "Congratulations, Mr. & Mrs. Cake!" stretched across the archway in the back portion of the room.

Yeah, this room is mostly open space, with a green carpet stretched across the floor. To my left, there's a raised area that looks like it would hold tables for sit in eating, but it's been completely cleared out for some reason or another. Straight ahead, I can see a counter with a glass front, the kind you'd usually see in candy shops. There are candies and cupcakes displayed inside of it, and they look really delicious. I want one. On the right, there's a longer, wooden counter, with an old fashioned cash register set up.

Also, I can see multiple tables set up, with various drinks and other foodstuffs above them. Sweet, that means I get free food. So working for Vinyl comes with free refreshments. This is great. Maybe not healthy, but it's awesome, so it's totally okay.

Then there are the ponies everywhere. There are many other ponies invited to this gig or whatever, some of which I recognize. Unfortunately, that means that some of them recognize me as well.

"Mr. Seth!" I turn my head to see Flitter walking towards me with a smile on her face. She has a plate of cookies on her back that somehow stays balanced as she walks. I give her an unethusiastic wave, but it doesn't seem like it's going to keep her from talking to me.

"Weren't you working on this storm or whatever?" I ask with a sigh. Flitter nodded enthusiastically.

"Yes, actually. I've never created anything more than overcast weather so this was really interesting!" she exclaimed. "But once the storm got really big, Rainbow Dash told me that the more experienced members would take over."

"So...Rainbow Dash is actually somewhat important?" I query, surprised to hear that egotistical brat's name. Flitter's eyes widened, and then she nodded.

"Oh yes! Miss Dash leads the Ponyville weather team! She's really good at it," Flitter informs me. Great...so I may have pissed off somebody important. Oh well, it's not like I need the approval of the weather team anyway. "She'll actually be here later tonight!"

...Oh you have got to be kidding me. I was just about to say something when yet another pony I recognize calls out my name. "Seth! Fancy seeing you here!" I turn, and to my surprise, Twilight is trotting towards me. Oh dear god, how many other ponies am I going to have to talk to?

"Hey bro! Save the socializing for later, you've got stuff to carry for me!" Vinyl calls from behind me. Thank you so fucking much, Vinyl.

"I'll be with you in a minute, Twilight, Flitter," I tell them, moving back to the cart. I pick up the first carton I see and heave it out of the cart.

"All right. I'll be over by the counter then," Twilight replies understandingly, moving away, while Flitter just nods, munching on a cookie. "Come see me when you get a chance!"

"Sure, whatever. Boss, where do I put this stuff?" I say, glancing at Vinyl.

"Just move everything in this cart to that raised area up there," she orders me, pointing a hoof at the cleared out area. "Unless it's labeled 'LED.' Those I want placed in this open area out here."

"I can't read Equestrian," I admit somewhat sheepishly. Vinyl stares at me for a moment. I can't read what she's thinking because of those glasses.

"All right then, come here," she finally says. Putting the box I'm holding down, I move over to her. Vinyl points a hoof at a particular box, upon which is more of that Equestrian scrawl. "That's LED in Equestrian. If you can memorize what that looks like, you should be fine."

I squint at the letters for a bit, and I notice a character that looks a little like "shi" in Katakana. I can remember that. "Got it," I say with a nod, and then I pick the box on the ground back up.

"Pinks! Can you clear the dance floor for me? I need room to set up!" Vinyl calls to the back room.

"Oki Doki Loki!" Pinkie chirps, bouncing back out into the front room. What the fuck did she just say? I don't...this fucking pony.

Over the next thirty minutes, Vinyl and I work together to set up her ensemble. For the smaller stuff, it's easy for me to move everything into the staging area on my own, but for her speakers and table, we have to carry them together.

Her tables and primary speakers are set up in the back corner of the staging area, so that she can sit behind them and blast her awesome without the sound destroying her ears. While she is setting up her tables, I am running cables to and from her tables to the speakers. Apparently she powers her tables with magic, which then runs through all these little cables to power the speakers and lights. If magic works anything like it does in human literature, it has to be tiring keeping all of this running for hours on end.

As for the lights, Vinyl helps me set them up down on the dance floor. It's around this time that Pinkie comes out of the kitchen with a fucking massive cake. After placing it on a table, she finally notices that I'm here. Thankfully though, she sees that I'm busy and just watches me work.

When the lights are set up, Vinyl turns to me. "Thanks for all your help, bro. I'll pay ya at the end of the night," she tells me with a grin. After I give her a nod in acknowledgement, she gallops back to her tables, no doubt ready to start playing.

Of course, the second I look like I'm not working, who do you think comes to talk to me? That fucking pink pony, that's who. "Hi!" Pinkie greets me brightly, bouncing up to me. Yeah, bouncing. Like, she hops on all four hooves multiple times. What the fuck.

"What do you want?" I demand coldly, not in the mood to deal with her. All I want to do is rest against a wall somewhere and eat sweets until I'm stuffed.

"Well, you're new in town, so I wanted to introduce myself because I like to know everypony in Ponyville!" Pinkie shoots off words at a mile a minute, making my brain work overtime to understand everything she's saying. "So hi! I'm Pinkie Pie, and I'm your new best friend!"

"I'm sorry, what? Did you just declare yourself my best friend?" I ask incredulously. Pinkie nods enthusiastically, and then she starts bouncing around me in circles. What in the...so much stupid...I don't know how to deal with this! And Crona returns. Goddammit.

"Yup yup! Everypony needs a friend, especially one that is new to the town and possibly to the world because no one has ever seen a human before now except in pictures and stuff, which were really pretty but they are no substitute for the real thing," she keeps talking at that incredible pace. Once I manage to make sense of what she just said, I blink. Did...she just call me pretty? "So I wanted to say welcome welcome-"

Pinkie had actually started to sing, but thankfully, an orange hoof wraps around her mouth, keeping her quiet. Applejack is apparently here too. "Now, Pinkie Pie, don't go crowdin' Seth here," she admonishes Pinkie lightly. I would thank her, but I'm getting the fuck out of dodge before Pinkie finds me.

I dart around the corner to the counter, zipping around a surprised Twilight and resting against the wood next to her. "Hi. Save me from that fucking pink menace," I whispered to her. Twilight giggles at how panicked I look.

"She's not that bad, once you get used to her. Take it from me, though, there's no hiding from her when she really wants to talk to you. Rainbow can tell you that much," Twilight warns me. I groan and rub my forehead.

"That bitch gives me a headache every time she opens her mouth...if I have to see her every day, I'm going to get an aneurism and die," I grunt. "So what is this party even for?"

"This? Oh, the owners of this store, Mr. and Mrs. Cake, won an award for their culinary abilities, and were in Canterlot for the past few days to showcase some of their best dishes," Twilight explains. Huh, that's pretty sweet I guess. Makes me want to eat their food more. Speaking of which, I reach over and grab a cupcake from one of the tables.

"How long do these things generally last?" I continue, taking a bite from the cupcake. Oh dear god, it tastes like pure chocolate heaven. Before Twilight can answer, I have to emit a small moan. "Oh god, this is fucking glorious."

"You see why they won an award? As for your question, a Pinkie party usually lasts until the last pony leaves, which can be around midnight or later," Twilight replies with a warm smile. I don't respond, as I'm busy enjoying this magical bundle of confectionary awesomness. But essentially, this is like a college party, only with less alcohol and more sweets. I'm totally okay with that, too.

"Where's the punch?!" yells a pony who had just entered, colored a plum pink with a raspberry mane and tail. I raise an eyebrow at that, but I lose sight of her in the steadily growing crowd of ponies.

"Oh, Berry Punch is here," Twilight remarks with a smile.

Seconds later, a thoroughly soaked Rainbow Dash walks in through the front door. "Yeah! Check out this masterpiece I got running outside!" she calls out proudly, pointing with a hoof out into the pouring rain.

"Oh sure, you made getting here a pain in the tail before the storm hit!" Vinyl responds with a grin from the raised area, catching Rainbow's eyes.

"That's your fault for being slow!" Rainbow jokes, and then she shakes herself like a dog, sending droplets of water flying around her.

"Dashie! So glad you could make it! We've got almost everypony!" Pinkie greets the cyan mare with a bright smile, bouncing over to her with a towel. Rainbow takes the towel gratefully and wraps it around her body.

"Hey, Pinkie. Are the Cakes here yet?" Rainbow inquires, looking around.

"No, silly billy! If they were here, the party would already be started!" Pinkie answers, and then the two of them walk back into the crowd, talking animatedly.

Yep, this feels like a college party. It's just as uncomfortable as one too. Too bad I can't leave. I'm getting paid to stick around and help Vinyl pack up at the end of the night.

Which probably means I'm going to have to socialize. This will not end well.

* * *

So many new ponies to characterize! Applejack was difficult for some reason, despite how straightforward she is in the show. But on the other hand, I get to write more dialogue with (best pony) Pinkie Pie! She's going to get a song sometime soon, and Seth is going to flip a table.

There's gonna be a lot more of Vinyl too. Also, I'm bringing in Rarity next chapter I believe. Stay tuned for more!


	7. Never a Tool to be Used

Several more ponies arrive over the course of several minutes, and then Pinkie seems satisfied that everyone on the guest list is here. Because she's trying to surprise the Cakes, all of the lights are out.

"All right, everypony! You know the drill! The Cakes are on their way, so keep quiet until I flick on the lights!" Pinkie announces over the chattering of the crowd of ponies. The chattering slowly quiets down as the ponies all head to hiding places.

I can't believe I'm participating in a surprise party. This kind of thing seems so...childish. I don't know how old these ponies are, but I think I'd prefer a a more formal arrangement...ah who am I kidding, I'd never want a party for anything I do. Unless it's just Amaryllis. And she brings alcohol.

"Hello again, Seth," a pony whispers to to me as she settles next to me behind the counter. I turn my head to try and see who's next to me, but it's too dark to see anything other than a vague outline.

"Uh...too dark," I whisper back. I hear a small chuckle from the pony, and then a dim light forms from seemingly nothing. The light, which is coming from the horn of the pony next to me, reveals a familiar mint green unicorn. Lyra soon extinguishes the light. "Oh. Hey."

"Good to see you again. Talk to me after the surprise?" Lyra asks me softly. I nod, but then I remember that she can't see me.

"Sure. I'll probably be eating or dancing," I reply uncaring. Lyra giggles a bit.

"I can't wait to see that," she whispers, but then the pony next to her, who I'm assuming is Bon Bon, hushes her.

"Quiet, they're coming!" a pony hisses. Everything goes as silent as a tomb. Sure enough, I can hear two ponies talking outside.

"Oh thank Celestia...we're home. I can't wait to be in out of this rain," a mature female's voice filters in through the door, barely audible over the sound of the storm. The door opens, the bell ringing, and the silouhette of two ponies step inside, folding up their umbrellas and stashing them nearby.

"Huh, it's so dark. Let me light up some candles and then we'll be-" the male begins, but then the lights turn on, courtesy of Twilight's magic.

"SURPRISE!" All of the ponies that were lying in hiding stood up at once, shocking the hell out of the two ponies, who I think I can assume are the Cakes. The yellow stallion sits down out of shock, while the blue mare takes a few steps back.

"Welcome back, Mr. and Mrs. Cake! Welcome to your Hooray-we-won-an-award party! Were you surprised? I bet you were, because we were when you won!" Pinkie squealed in excitement, running over to the two bakers and bouncing up and down. That pony is way too hyper.

"Yes...I think I can say we definitely weren't expecting this," Mrs. Cake replies uncertainly, though a small smile was spreading across her face..

"Especially in a rainstorm like this...but thanks Pinkie, we appreciate it," Mr. Cake adds as he looks around in awe at the decorations.

"I think we can afford to let off a little steam. Those Canterlot ponies were so stuffy," Mrs. Cake decides her smile widening. Pinkie's grin grew even wider, if that was possible. I don't know how her lips don't split from smiling so much. Smiling a lot tends to hurt.

"That's great, because I went all out for this one! Vinyl, hit it!" Pinkie declares, throwing her hooves in the air. The Cakes appear to recognize that name, as they gasp a bit.

"You got it Pinks! Let's get this party started!" Vinyl shouts, and then she sets a record on her table. An upbeat party song blasts out of her speakers, and the LED lights that the two of us had so painstakingly set up flare to life. The center of the room, which is the designated dance floor, lights up with bright colors that rotated around as Vinyl's magic did its work.

"Yeah, now this is a party! Let's go dance, Seth!" Lyra yells over the music, her eyes alight with joy. I open my mouth to protest vehemently, but the music drowns me out, and Lyra has clamped her front hooves around my arm, dragging me out to the dance floor. I make sure to leave my rifle behind by the counter.

Damn it, I don't mind dancing, but I don't like the idea of dancing with anyone other than Amaryllis. Eh, fuck it. I'm only dancing with her if I acknowledge the fact that she exists. Besides, this isn't a slow song, so no touching is involved. Now that I think of it, how does a pony slow dance anyway? I'm not sure I want to know.

This song is good enough, so I instinctively move my body to the beat. I'd like to say I have a pretty good rhythm, as I would always listen to music between classes back at college. That makes me miss my headphones. I hate that I left them in the school with my bag.

My dancing inevitably draws the attention of the ponies that either don't know me, or do and thought I was too stiff to dance.

Twilight blinks, tilting her head to one side. She seems completely nonplussed by my seemingly uncharacteristic actions. Of course, if she knew me well enough, she'd know it's in character. I don't give a fuck what others think, hence why I dance. It's fun. That's all that matters.

Rainbow Dash, noticing me for the first time, scowls at first, but when she notices what I'm doing, she points a hoof at me and laughs so hard she falls over.

Applejack is nodding her head to the beat as well, not really paying that much attention to me, which I appreciate.

As for Pinkie...she screams happily and streaks over to us in a flash of pink and joins Lyra and I on the dance floor, and she starts pulling some of the most ridiculous, and yet somehow impressive dance moves I've ever seen. Have you ever seen a pony breakdance? Well, I have. And it looks fucking hilarious, yet awesome.

You know...maybe I can put aside the fact that there are ponies everywhere, and just have some fun.

Pinkie's eagerness entices some of the shyer ponies to join us out here. Flitter, having finished her cookies, trots out to meet us. She taps me on the leg with a hoof, so I turn to her. She's gazing at me with these pleading eyes. Apparently she wants some attention. I'm not actually dancing with anyone, I'm just doing my own thing. Whether or not they want to think I'm dancing with them is another matter.

I shrug and take a step closer to Flitter, who makes a barely noticeable squee and starts dancing as well. Heh, it's ridiculous how happy they get if I act even a little bit nice.

Behind me, Lyra huffs, annoyed that her supposed dance partner was stolen away. She's placated, however, when Bon Bon comes and joins her out on the dance floor.

Soon, the song ends, and I take a break, stepping away to go get something to eat. You know, of all the jobs I could have picked, this was a good choice. I am practically getting paid to party.

"I see you're fitting in a little better," Twilight comments, beaming, as I approach the counter she's resting against. I scoff at that. She's over-analyzing my dancing as something more than was it is. Ignoring her at first, I grab some cookies from a plate on the counter and greedily stuff one in my mouth. Oh my god...fucking homemade cookies are the best thing ever. That store bought shit ain't got nothing on this!

"Not really. I just like to dance. Whether or not they want to dance near me is their business," I deny in between mouthfuls of sweet chocolaty goodness. Twilight's face falls at that. Hah, did you think your friendship spheal was going to change me so easily? Yeah, nope. I have twenty years of previous experience to know that 99% of humanity is trash and not worth knowing, and so far nothing has convinced me that ponies aren't the same way.

"I think you should give us ponies a chance. We may surprise you," Twilight suggests, gazing at me meaningfully.

"Yeah, and you might not," I retort, eating another cookie. "Goddamn, these are good."

"Hey! I thought you didn't want our company?" That voice...I groan inwardly. I knew this was coming ever since I saw her walk through the door. I look to see a suspicious Rainbow Dash cantering towards me. "What gives?"

"I'm getting paid to be here, so fuck off," I snap at her, much to Twilight's horror and Rainbow's ire.

"Why would anypony hire a jerk like you?" Rainbow demands. I raise an eyebrow at her.

"You know, you've used that same word over and over. Update your insults and try again later," I tell her in a bored voice, eating another cookie. Rainbow turns red with anger and opens her mouth to shout at me, but Twilight cuts her off.

"Hang on, you two know each other?" she asks us curiously.

"Yep. This rainbow-tailed fucker almost killed me, and then wouldn't get lost," I answer before Rainbow could. Twilight looked accusingly at Rainbow, who looks like she'd been slapped.

"Twilight, don't give me that look! I don't know what he told you, but he made it pretty clear he's not anypony's friend!" she protests angrily, jabbing a hoof at me. Twilight sighs, gives me an apologetic look, and then wraps a hoof around Rainbow's shoulders, leading her off somewhere.

Finally, some peace. A thought occurs to me. Maybe I shouldn't eat so many cookies. I wouldn't want to get full too fast. I want to have some of that monster cake Pinkie made, too. I wonder when they'll be cutting it. Oh look, blueberry muffins! Mine mine mine mine...

Just as I'm reaching out a hand to grab a muffin, a light grey hoof reaches in and grabs the entire plate. My hand hangs there limply, my anger rising. I turn, about to give the thieving pony a piece of my mind when her appearance gives me some pause.

The pony, whose wings identified it as a pegasus, is colored that same light grey, and she has a short blonde mane and tail. Her butt tattoo is a bunch of bubbles, whatever the fuck that means. But that's not the most striking feature. No, that would be those fucking eyes of hers. They're all over the place. I'm not kidding. I don't know if she's permanently cross-eyed or has two lazy eyes, or what, but all I know is that her eyes are looking everywhere but at me.

There's already a muffin in her mouth, which she is chomping on merrily. When she notices me looking at her with an irritated look on my face, she swallows the muffin and gives me a sheepish grin, crumbs stuck to her muzzle. "I'm sorry, mister. You can have a muffin too," she says apologetically in an odd, yet strangely adorable voice. She holds out the plate to me.

I find the angry words I had been prepared to throw at her dying in my throat. Instead, I adopt a wry expression and take a muffin from the plate. "Glad I have your permission," I remark, and then I take a bite of the muffin...and the taste fucking blows me away. I'm so used to the mostly bland store bought stuff, so the sheer quality makes me wonder what I've been missing all my life.

"You look nice, mister. What's your name?" the pegasus asks, sniffing at me curiously. That...what the hell does she mean by "you look nice?" Does that mean I look like a nice person? Or that I literally look nice, like physically? Because she'd be wrong on both accounts. Eh, I might as well humor the mare.

"Seth Rogers," I answer the strange pony, not exactly sure how to treat her. She looks as old as the others, but I have no way of knowing how old that is. The pony tilts her head to one side, her eyes rolling around in a disorienting fashion. How the hell does she function like that?

"It's sure nice to meetcha, Mr. Rogers. I'm Derpy Hooves," the pegasus responds, and then proceeds to munch on more muffins from the plate. I gaze back at her in disbelief. Her name is Derpy? What kind of name is that? Were her parents trying to insult her? I search my mind, wondering how the hell to react to this pony. Fuck it, I'll just make an excuse and go elsewhere.

Before I can, a streak of cyan zips between Derpy and I, causing me to stumble backwards. Rainbow is standing between us, looking at Derpy with a smile.

"Derpy, why don't you go share some of those muffins with your daughter?" Rainbow addressed the grey pegasus gently. Derpy turns her head in Rainbow's general direction, and then she nods enthusiastically.

"Oh yes, I'll do that. Little Dinky would love these!" Derpy exclaimed, and then she trotted around the edge of the room with the plateful of muffins. "See you later, Mr. Rogers!"

The moment she's gone, Rainbow turns and glares at me, her previously kind expression disappearing, to be replaced by suspicion. "You better not have said anything mean to her, or I'd never forgive you," she warns me. I can't help but laugh at how lame that threat sounded.

"Oh no, the multicolored pony will never forgive me. How can I possibly live with myself now?" I respond, the sarcasm practically dripping from every word. Rainbow looks infuriated by that.

"You did! You totally said something nasty to her, didn't you! I thought you were a jerk, but this is on a whole new level!" Whoa, Rainbow is a lot angrier than I expected. She gets right in my face, snarling at me. "If this wasn't a Pinkie Party, I'd beat the crap out of you!"

"Whoa, calm your shit. I hardly talked to her," I retract quickly, taking a step back. I don't know what it is about Derpy that makes Rainbow so fired up to protect her, but this pegasus looks like she's fully capable of carrying out her threat. I didn't notice before, but there are some strong muscles on her. She may not be an earth pony, but those muscles are intimidating as hell.

"How do you expect me to believe that? You totally seem like the kind of guy that would pick on her!" Rainbow snapped.

"No! I may be a bitter cynical ass, but I'm no bully," I object, holding up my hands in an attempt to placate her. I can't fucking believe I'm having to do this. This is why I avoid parties...there's always something I do to fuck it up, and then I end up in a corner somewhere, wondering why nobody cares that I exist.

Rainbow eyes me, probably wondering whether or not she can trust my word. I hope she decides she can. Even the weakest horse can seriously hurt a human with a well placed buck.

"What's up with her anyway?" I ask in an attempt to change the subject. Rainbow blinks, and then she finally takes a step back. I release that breath that I'd been subconsciously holding. I'm used to being an asshole, but I've never been nasty enough to warrant a violent reaction out of someone.

"What, Derpy? She's...well, she's a really sweet girl, but with her eyes all like..." Rainbow paused a moment to make an odd gesture with her hooves. I nodded in understanding. "...she has trouble getting around. Some ponies give her a hard time because of that."

"That's terrible...seems I was right in assuming that you ponies aren't that different from my useless species," I reply, getting a little angry at the nameless ponies that would make fun of someone with a disability. Rainbow cocks her head to one side, my wording confusing her.

"'Useless species?' What exactly did you go through that makes you think so poorly of your own species?" she questions me. I shoot her a look. Seriously? Did she really just pop off a soul searching question at me?

"Like I'm going to answer a question like that," I scoff derisively. Rainbow adopts a frustrated expression, stomping her hoof on the floor.

"Aw, come on! I'm trying to be nice here," she complains, clearly unused to acting in such a way.

"Exactly my point. You're being nice because you want something out of me. Just like Twilight is being nice because she wants to know more about my kind. It's as transparent as it is old," I counter. Rainbow looks taken aback by my logic, and then she puts on a sad expression, similar to the one Applejack wore when I told her to back off.

"So...you should come dance," Rainbow suggests suddenly, grinning a bit. I glance at her askance, wondering where in the hell that came from.

"No," I tell her flatly, grabbing a cupcake from the table and biting into it. Rainbow doesn't seem to be dissuaded.

"Why, too scared of being shown up on the dance floor by yours truly?" she teases me confidently.

I almost drop the cupcake.

"You...I..." I stammer. Rainbow's grin grows.

"Or wait, are you worried about what all of these ponies think?" she presses, leaning in smugly. She's...did...fuck it. Just fuck it.

"You know, just for THAT, I'll show you how to really dance!" I declared, a huge sense of deja vu striking me. This has to be one hell of a coincidence...practically word for word.

"Now that's what I'm talking about! Show me your moves!" Rainbow exclaimed, and the two of us made our way out onto the dance floor. Pinkie is still there, having seemingly infinite energy, and now Twilight is here, though her dancing is so bad, I can't look at her and keep a straight face. Rainbow feels similarly, as she's stifling her laughter behind a hoof.

Just as I step onto the dance floor, Vinyl changes the song, and the tune becomes...oh my god, is that rock? Oh fuck the hell yes. My head is banging.

Pinkie notices Rainbow and I dancing near one another, so she soon comes to join us, followed by Flitter, Lyra, Bon Bon, and a few other ponies I don't recognize. The Cakes are also out on the dance floor, enjoying the party.

For the next three minutes, life is a happy blur. For just one moment, I can forget that I'm dancing with ponies. All of that stress I've accumulated over the days is just fucking gone, washed away by a torrent of music.

"Applejack's in the house, yeeeeehaaaw!" Suddenly, Applejack is there, pushing her way into the group. "Whatsa matter, Rainbow Dash? Yer dancin' like a wet noodle out here."

"Oh yeah? I'd like to see you do better, Applejack!" Rainbow rises to the challenge eagerly, and the two of them face one another, attempting to outdance the other, whatever that means. Of course, it isn't long before I crash the party.

"You know what? You both suck. Stand back and let the master show you how it's done!" I challenge them both. The both of them look at me in surprise, but then they grin and the three of us start having a...a what? A dance-off? A competition? A see-who-can-fuck-around-the-most battle? Whatever. All I know is that I don't hold any illusions of being a better dancer. I'm honestly just fucking around.

By the end of the song, I'm a bit tired, because I had danced a bit enthusiastically. I extricate myself from the dance floor and move over to the punch bowl, as I'm feeling a bit thirsty. That's a lie. A lot thirsty, since I haven't really had real water other than Twilight's tea, and that doesn't really count.

There's several ponies by the punch bowl, but one really stands out to me. That's because she's wearing a fucking over the top dress. Like, something you'd see at a semi-formal dance. Hell, her entire appearance has been groomed and styled to perfection. Her mane is a bright purple that shined in the dim light, and fell down before terminating in elegant curls. She's got pure white fur, and I can see a horn that tells me she's a magic wielding unicorn.

The moment she spots me, she lets out a little gasp. I roll my eyes, expecting another frantic babble about how I'm a human and how I'm supposed to be extinct. "Oh, what _are_ you wearing, dear?" she questioned me in a very prim and proper tone, with a hint of distaste present.

"I'm sorry, what?" I deadpan. Did...she really just...what...ugh, great.

"I had imagined that a wondrous being from the distant past would be dressed elegantly, but those? They look like they haven't been washed in _days_!" the unicorn expresses. I sigh deeply.

"That's because they haven't...this is the only set of clothes I own. I couldn't exactly bring a fucking dresser with me when I came here!" I snap at her. The mare recoils, looking horrified, partially at my foul language.

"That sounds horrible! You simply must stop by my boutique later so that we can rectify this situation," she beseeches me. I rub my forehead with my fingers. She looks like her clothing would be extremely expensive. Yeah, I can't afford that kind of stuff.

"I don't even know who you are," I remind her.

"Oh! Pardon my manners, darling. I am Rarity, and I run the Carousel Boutique, on the hill just southwest of the town square." the unicorn introduces herself with a flourish and a bow, causing me to raise an eyebrow. Was that really necessary?

"That's great. Maybe I'll show up," I answer, without caring. Yeah, there's no fucking way. I'll buy clothes from someone less likely to bleed me dry. Rarity smiles, satisfied by my answer.

Now that I have a moment's peace, I grab a cup and turn to dip it into the punch bowl...only to find Berry Punch drinking out of it. My hand, still holding to cup, drops to my side. I gaze at the offending pony incredulously.

The moment Berry Punch notices I'm watching, she yelps and falls on the ground, and then she scampers away into the crowd.

"You've got to be fucking kidding me," I grunt. There went any chance of me getting any punch.

"Language, darling," Rarity warns me, earning an incredulous glance from me. Who the fuck do you think you are?

"Screw you," I retort, before stalking away to find some other place to get a drink, leaving Rarity behind.

"How rude," I hear Rarity huff, but I don't really care. She's not my mother, and even if she was, my mother was as bad as I am, so she didn't give even a hint of a fuck.

"Hi! How are you enjoying the party?" Pinkie is suddenly in my face, having appeared from seemingly nowhere. I recoil back with a yelp, nearly dropping the cup.

"Ah! Where the hell did you come from?!" I cry. I'm pretty sure I had only looked away for half a second, but now, a wild Pinkie has appeared.

"From the dance floor, silly billy!" Pinkie answers as if it were obvious. Oh my god...I lose neurons just talking to this pony.

"No I meant...ugh, whatever. It's a good party, I'll give you that much," I admit. Pinkie brightens up even more, if that's even possible. "There a place to get water in here?"

"Yepper depper! I know a spot in the back! Don't go anywhere!" Pinkie grabs my hand, snatches the cup, and then bounces away towards the back room before I even know what's going on. Just...what?

My eyes rove over the giant cake Pinkie had made. To my delight, I notice that it had already been cut into slices, and some of them were already missing. That means I can get some. I take a step forward.

"Don't go anywhere!" Pinkie calls from the back room, and I freeze. How the hell did she know I was moving?

Sulking, I stand still and watch other ponies taking slices of cake away. There's still plenty, but I really want some.

Pinkie returns soon with the cup she took from me filled to the brim with water. I take it from her gratefully, and then I drain it in a few seconds. As if expecting that, Pinkie takes the glass back and the produces another from nowhere, which I then drain as well.

"Thanks," I tell her, and then I start moving away. "I'm going to go and get some of that cake now."

"Oki doki loki!" Pinkie responds, and she bounces back to the dance floor. That pony defies all explanation.

I cackle a bit to myself as I reach the cake. There are several plates ready for the taking, so I reach in and snatch one. "Yoink!" I say aloud, though nobody can really hear it but me.

Right, there's no forks. Fuck it, I guess my hands are getting covered in frosting. I grab the slice of cake and eat it in a few bites. It's just as amazing as I was expecting. It's so good, I even lick the frosting off my hands. Wow, that Pinkie is an incredible baker.

"Hey, Seth!" Twilight is approaching me with a smile. When I turn my attention to her, she gestures back at the dance floor. "Want to come back out?"

Ugh...fuck it.

* * *

The party goes on for a long time, though I don't know specifics because I don't have a damn watch. All I know is that by the time the storm blows over, ponies are starting to trickle out. Flitter comes and finds me before she leaves, thanking me for the dance and hoping to see me tomorrow. Lyra does something similar, but Bon Bon isn't as friendly. The bitch.

Rarity leaves once she was certain it wasn't raining anymore. Another pegasus, colored a buttery yellow with a pink mane, accompanies her.

As for me, the moment the music stops, I can see a tired and sweaty Vinyl waving me over from the raised area. "Clean up time, bro!" she declares. I nod and join her up top. I still don't know her equipment well enough to know where everything goes, so I let her direct me.

The easiest thing she has me do is folding up the cables and placing them in the boxes she indicates. I do my best to memorize the labels on the boxes for future reference, but it's difficult. It is an entirely new language, after all.

While I'm working, Pinkie is zipping around the place like a hornet, cleaning up all of the decorations so that the shop can resume normal operations in the morning. Twilight, Rainbow, and Applejack are chatting on the dance floor, occasionally moving aside if Vinyl or I need to grab some of the lights.

The Cakes never did talk to me, as they instead headed straight up to bed once the party had ended. I'm fine with that. I could care less that this was their party. I just know that it was A party, and it was a really fun one.

Lastly, Vinyl and I hoist all of her equipment back into the cart, which Pinkie had stored in the back room to make space.

"Awright, that's everything! You ready to go, Seth?" Vinyl asks me. I nodded, panting. It probably hadn't been such a good idea to eat so much, and then try to heavy lift.

"Hey Scratchie! You don't want to leave without your payment, do you?" Pinkie streaks, once again, out of nowhere with a large sack in her mouth.

"Yeah, I was just about to ask for it. Awesome!" Vinyl says, taking the sack. She opens it up and fishes through it, as if counting it. Isn't that bad etiquette to count the money in front of the one who paid you? Oh wait...she's taking some out. "These are yours, Seth. Thanks for the help."

I open my hand and she drops five bits into it. Yes, I have eight bits now. I wonder if that will get me a room to rent or something. "Yo, Vinyl, how much is a cheap hotel in this town?" I query, hoping for a good number. Vinyl appears to think for a moment.

"Well, I think the cheapest would probably be around ten bits a night," Vinyl tells me. My face falls immediately.

"Fuck! Well, I guess I'm working three jobs tomorrow," I curse, punching the wall. "Tonight's gonna suck."

"What? Dude, didn't you work all day with Applejack?" Vinyl protests.

"Yeah, but I spent some of the money on food, because I hadn't eaten in fucking days," I explain. Vinyl sighs, and goes to fish some more money out of the sack. "Don't you fucking dare."

"What?" Vinyl uttered, surprised by my denial.

"I told you, I don't want your charity. I earned those five bits, so that's all that I'll accept," I asserted with a growl.

"Look, I'm not letting ya sleep outside. You'll get sick, what with all that mud," Vinyl tells me flatly.

"Then I get sick-" I begin, but then the sound of a gasp cuts me off. I turn my head, and then I freeze when I see that Twilight is looking directly at me. It had been her that had gasped. Oh...shit.

"You told me you _had_ a place to stay!" Twilight accused, walking away from her friends and towards Vinyl and I. Well...that cat's out of the bag. I'm busted.

"I...may have lied," I confess slowly, unsure how the librarian would react. She doesn't look happy, that's for sure.

"Why would you lie about something like that? I would have offered you my spare bed!" Twilight demands. Vinyl looks at me as well, and I realize with a sinking feeling that I'm being ganged up on.

"Yeah, what's up with all this refusing kindness stuff, bro?" Vinyl rejoins. Their combined gazes are enough to set me off.

"That's enough, goddammit! It's my business where I sleep, not any of yours!" Suddenly, I have the attention of everyone in the room as my voice rises to a shout.

"Seth, it's just not healthy. We're only trying to help you," Twilight expresses, stepping closer. I step back, but my back is soon in a corner, with Vinyl and Twilight blocking my only escape routes.

"Bullshit! I'm a complete unknown, a total stranger that you met a day ago! You have no reason to help me, unless you take into account the fact that I'm a being from your history. If even one of you writes a book on me, you're famous. I'm not telling you anything, so you might as well stop trying to be nice!" I shoot back, getting in their faces. They're speechless in the wake of my tirade. Yeah, that's right, you bitches. What are you going to do, now that I'll called you out on your shit?

"Bro...that's just messed," Vinyl comments. I really wish I could see her fucking eyes, because I can't read her emotions like this. "I don't know how your kind did things, but we are not like that."

"We're not out to use you, Seth. What happened? What has you so convinced we're trying to use you?" Twilight presses, looking up at me with those soulful eyes of hers. Stop, don't you use your cutesy bullshit on me!

"Like I'm really going to tell you that," I grunt. Twilight and Vinyl sigh impatiently.

"So it seems we're at an impasse," Twilight points out. "We can't seem to prove to you that we're telling the truth, but neither can you prove that we're lying."

"I'm still going to sleep outside," I tell them stubbornly, crossing my arms and looking away.

"Sorry 'bout this, but ah couldn't help but overhear," Applejack joins in, trotting over to us, along with Rainbow Dash. "Ah think ah might have an idea on how ta deal with all this."

"Oh, this oughta be good," I grunt, while Twilight and Vinyl give their attention to Applejack.

"How 'bout this. Why don't one o' y'all rent out yer spare room, for like six bits a naht? That way it ain't charity," Applejack suggests. I blink. I didn't expect something that...sensible to come out of her mouth. It's not a hotel, but at least they wouldn't be trying to give it to me out of charity. There's no way I'd be a freeloader. That's just wrong.

"I'd be down for that," Vinyl says hopefully. Twilight snapped her mouth shut, having been about to offer the same thing. I give a slow nod. "I...can accept that. You better take my fucking payments, though."

"All raht!" Applejack says with a broad smile. "This works out. Ah'll see ya bright an early tomorrow mornin'?"

"Yeah. I can do that."

* * *

After making sure to grab my rifle, Vinyl and I move the cart out of the building and down the ramp, into the streets. Luckily, the streets aren't that muddy, or moving this cart anywhere would be a pain in the ass.

As we move the cart towards Vinyl's house, the others walk with us, socializing with one another. I don't involve myself in their conversation, as it's mostly just shit I don't care about, like the Wonderbolts' latest stunts, or the yield of the rest of "applebuck season," whatever that is.

Twilight is the first to break off, and she heads back to her library with a wave and a "See you tomorrow, Seth!" I give her a small wave in return.

Rainbow takes off next, spreading her wings and shooting into the air, heading to wherever she lives. Applejack stays with us all the way to Vinyl's house.

"Awright, help me get this into the house," Vinyl orders me as she opens the front door. I nod and push on the other end of the cart, while she guides me in.

Once the cart is inside, Vinyl releases it with a sigh. "Thanks bro. Come on in. It's a mess, I hope you don't mind."

"You've clearly never seen a college dorm," I quip, stepping over the threshold, making sure to duck under the low top.

"Ah'll see ya in the mornin' Seth!" Applejack calls, and after I wave to her, she trots out of sight. Vinyl shuts the door, leaving us in the dim light.

I take a look around. I seem to be in a sitting room, with a few armchairs positioned around a fireplace. Further beyond, I can see a kitchen, which is an absolute mess, but it's still cleaner than my dorm. At least she keeps the sink empty. Lastly, there's a staircase on the far right, where I'm assuming the bedrooms are.

"This is my pad! Hope it's to your liking," Vinyl remarks, sweeping a hoof across the room. Then, she promptly plonks down into an armchair, smiling lazily. To my interest, I see her remove her ever present shades and place them on a nearby end table. Her eyes...oh my god, is that fucking red? No, it's more like a magenta shade, but dark enough to be misconstrued for red. They look odd...but it works for her. I like it.

"So when's your next gig?" I ask curiously, wondering when the next time I'll get paid is.

"Not tomorrow, but definitely the day after," Vinyl answers tiredly. "So tomorrow, I ain't doin' a thing."

"Lucky you. Anyway, where am I sleeping?" I retort, fishing out the required payment.

"Upstairs. The spare room is the last door on the right. Restroom is directly across from it," Vinyl directs me. I nod and move towards the stairs. Just before I do, a sudden thought strikes me.

"Last question. Do you happen to have a blank notebook and a pencil lying around for me to use?"

"Huh? Yeah sure. One moment." Vinyl fishes around in one of the end tables before she pulls out a sizeable book. "I keep a bunch of these around for music notes. I don't know what a pencil is, but there's a quill and inkwell on the desk in your room."

"Thanks. Here's the six bits, as well as one extra for the book," I say, handing her the money. Vinyl's eyes widen, and she looks at me in confusion.

"What? You don't need to pay me for the boo-"

"Take it!" I cut across her flatly. Vinyl, resigned, takes the payment, leaving me the proud owner of a single bit. "Good night."

"Night, bro!" she calls after me as I walk up the stairs. Goddamn, this has been a long day. At least now I can get a decent wash. I think I'll do that before writing anything in this book.

The bathroom is small, but it works. I raise an eyebrow at how similar the bathrooms look to what we use. Just how much of their culture is based off of ours?

I turn on the shower, and then quickly relieve myself before getting undressed and throwing my clothes on the floor.

Dear god, the feeling of the warm water coursing over my tired body is fucking glorious. And now I can actually get clean. Scrubbing at my body does wonders for my mental state, especially as I watch the sweat and grime disappear.

When I'm at last finished, I dry off with a plush white towel, and then I hang it up to dry on the rack. I put on only my boxers, and then I walk across the hall into my new room, carrying the rest of my dirty ass clothes.

It's nothing fancy. There's a bed crammed against one side of the room, a dresser next to it, and a desk on the opposite side of the room, with the quill and inkwell Vinyl mentioned sitting atop of it.

Throwing my clothes on the floor and shutting the door, I sit down at the desk with my new notebook. I know exactly what to use this for.

I dip the quill into the inkwell and start to write on the first page, but since this is the first time I've ever used a quill, I fuck up miserably. So I decide to keep fucking up on that first page until I figure things out, and then I write the first lines of what is to be my new journal.

_"I have no idea where to begin. Right now, I'm sitting in a cheap room, penning this in a recently bought notebook in an attempt to keep myself sane. God knows there hasn't been a decent person to talk to since getting here. No, everybody here is fucking crazy..."_

* * *

You know, I hadn't expected the party to last as long as it did, but I think it worked out well enough. Lots of character development and just general hilarity going on.

Also, the first arc of this story, the New World Arc, is now over, and the next one begins! Don't worry, it'll be slice of life for a bit longer, before I slam right into the adventure portion. I still have a few more key events to go through.

Leave a comment and tell me how I did.


	8. Lost Humanity

Well, I never thought something like this would happen. Honestly, I never thought I'd write in this journal ever again, since I felt like I'd pretty much acclimatized to living in this world called Equestria that still reminds me of something out of a vivid acid trip.

So I was wrong. Eventually I'll learn to stop taking things for granted. I mean, look what happened the first time? I lost the entire human race in the space of a three thousand year long second.

Anyhow, I shouldn't just write about shit you haven't heard about yet. So much happened between my last entry and now, so I might as well start from the beginning, so that I can take another look at it myself. Sometimes I wonder what I was thinking.

Let's begin the morning after that damn party, shall we?

* * *

I wake with a start upon hearing a loud knocking on the door. Wait, what? Where am I? What's going on?

"Get up, bro, time for work!" a female voice shouts. Ugh, I'm so damn groggy...what in the hell did I do last night to make me so tired?

Memory hits me like a tidal wave. Oh...that's fucking right. That was my second night in this crazy ass psychedelic world called Equestria, filled with three different types of brightly colored ponies that preach friendship like it's some kind of religion.

No...it doesn't get any less stupid no matter how many times I say it.

"I'm up," I reply weakly to the voice, who I now recognize as Vinyl Scratch, a decent musician for whom I work. That reminds me...I was a party last night. Oh...shit. Those ponies are going to think I'm more inclined to be friends with them after that night, just because I got a little sugar high and acted hyper. And there's also the fact that I actually accepted Vinyl's offer to stay at her place, but not without rent. So essentially I'm a tenant that can leave whenever I want, and not a freeloader that spends his every moment in debt to his benefactor. That's not going to be me.

Never again.

I force myself out of bed, still feeling tired. I probably shouldn't have stayed up so late writing that fucking journal, but it feels really good to have all this crazy shit on paper. If anything, it'll make for one crazy story if I ever wake up from this nightmare.

Screw bathing. I'm heading to work on a farm, for fuck's sake, so there's no point. I'll just get sweaty and gross anyway. Oh yeah, my clothes are still filthy. I ignore how smelly they are and put them on anyway. My trusty rifle is resting against the desk, which I grab on my way out.

As for the journal...what do I do with this? Ah, fuck it. I'll just stash it in the drawer. If she looks at it, no big deal. There will just be one less pony in the world.

I walk down the stairs, holding the rifle over my shoulder for no particular reason other than it feels right and probably looks cool. I can smell something good cooking in the kitchen, which makes my stomach growl, but I ignore it. I'll eat after work, with the money that I earn myself...if I even have enough. If it's like eight right now, and we work until six, that will earn me ten bits, for a total of eleven. Huh, I like that. If I keep this up, I'll have enough money for the rent, some food, and maybe some spending money for myself.

"Morning, Seth," Vinyl grunts as she walks out of the kitchen. I suppress a chuckle at the state of her. Her mane is messier than usual, and her eyes are half shut. She must not be a morning per...fuck...morning pony. I'm never getting used to that. Anyway, she's also sipping out of a coffee mug, cementing that theory. She sniffs at me as I pass by. "Dude, those clothes stink."

"Oh really? I hadn't noticed," I reply sarcastically, leaning against the wall. There's a clock above the fireplace. According to it, it's around seven thirty, meaning I got around five or six hours of sleep last night. No wonder I feel like shit.

"Either grab a new set or ditch them," Vinyl suggests, causing me to give her a surprised and slightly disgusted look. Ditch my clothes? Is she trying to come on to m...wait a minute, ponies don't usually wear clothes, so it must seem pretty odd that I do. When I don't reply, she continues. "Want some breakfast?"

"No. I need to get going," I tell her, pushing myself off of the wall. She watches me walk towards the door with an unreadable expression on her face.

"Bro, you need to eat," she warns me. I sigh and open the door, wincing as the beams of early sunrise shine down on me.

"Back off," I scoff, earning a frown from her. Just before I can leave, she stops me with a hoof, looking at me in concern. I return her look with a glare that clearly says I'm not in the mood for her shit.

"I'm just trying to look out for you. No need to be snippy," Vinyl admonishes me, and then I see her levitate something from behind the couch over to her. It looks like...huh, that must be the guitar strap she mentioned.

"Nobody asked you to," I shoot back, though I do take the strap when she offers it to me. She did order me to take it, after all, as much as I resent her for it.

"Take that to the Carousel Boutique when you get off of work. She'll fix that to your stick," Vinyl tells me with a sad look on her face. I nod and then walk out onto the streets, slamming the door shut.

I really wish I could get a haircut. I usually keep my hair shoulder-length, but that's only because I tend to it, using shampoo and conditioner to keep it that glossy black that I'm so fond of. Now that I don't have access to my usual hygiene materials, it's going to dry out and look like shit. I guess I can try the pony versions of hair care items, but I have no idea what that will do to me. Why am I writing about this? Don't judge me, man, I'm lamenting the loss of my perfect hair.

I have one bit left, so if I take the route through the town square, I should be able to get some breakfast from Carrot Top's stall. I got a good amount last time for only three bits, so I should be able to stave off the worst of my hunger until after work. Man, I miss my college's dining hall. Now that I think about it, that probably made a good defensive position when the Oppressed attacked...and there goes my mood. Dammit, brain, you have one job. ONE. JOB.

Carrot Top sees me coming only a few moments after I enter the square. I notice she still looks somewhat nervous by my appearance, so when I reach her, I take the same approach that I took last time.

"Welcome back to Golden Harvest Vegetables, sir! What can I get you today?" Carrot top greets me, stuttering a bit, but quickly getting over it. Points for not freaking out again, I guess. I make sure to stoop down to her level, smiling.

"Hey, could you tell me how many carrots I can get for just one bit?" I ask her politely, already fishing out the single bit I have left. As she thinks of a response, I gaze at the food she's got on sale, my mouth watering a bit. Her carrots are amazing, I can't help it. I guess there's something to be said for organic food after all. I doubt ponies have come up with pesticides or genetic engineering yet.

"I think I can give you eight carrots, sir," Carrot Top finally answers me, still looking a bit nervous. I try not to scowl. Get the fuck over it already. I'm being nice and everything, you skittish pony.

"Thank you," I say shortly, handing over the bit and taking my food. I take my leave away from her, letting my scowl show as I hear her relieved sigh behind me. Bitch, if I was going to hurt you, I would have done it already. I can't believe these fucking ponies are the apex predators. You don't have anything on us humans.

I eat the carrots as I trek down the path towards Sweet Apple Acres. Nothing really eventful happens, at least not until I look up into the sky.

There's a streak of rainbow soaring through the air, making flips and corkscrews at a speed I can hardly make out. It's very impressive, but that mare's ego is large enough as it is. I think I'll keep my opinions to myself there.

Ignoring her and hoping that she won't notice me, I continue on to the farm. I can see the entrance just ahead, and from the looks of it, my employer is already getting ready for work.

Applejack is standing in front of the house with a cart full of various foodstuffs. I think I can see some apples in barrels, as well as other foods that look like pies wrapped in saran wrap. Big MacIntosh is next to her, strapped into a cart like the one Applejack and I had used to gather apples yesterday. Lastly, I see Apple Bloom sitting down beside them, wearing a set of saddlebags filled with what looks like books.

"Seth! Good ta see ya agin. Ya ready fer work?" Applejack calls, trotting over to me with a grin. I avert my eyes, running a hand through my hair. Still not comfortable with anybody saying that it's good to see me.

"Yeah, whatever. Just give me something to do," I mutter. Work is easy. Work doesn't require me to talk. My flippant response doesn't seem to bother Applejack at all, which makes me wonder what _does _bother her.

"You got it, partner. Would ya mind takin' Apple Bloom to school for me this morning?" Applejack's request causes me to raise an eyebrow at her. I cross my arms, even as Apple Bloom looks between her sister and me in confusion.

"You've got to be kidding me. I came here to work, not play babysitter," I state flatly, even as Apple Bloom protests.

"Yeah, sis, I ain't no baby! I can git ta school on ma own!" I shoot the filly a glance. At least she's on my side in this.

"Ah understand that, but you kin consider this part o' yer work. Ah gotta deliver these aroun' town, so ah'm busy," Applejack explains, but I'm still not convinced. I don't understand why I can't just do what I did yesterday, with Big MacIntosh doing the bucking instead of her. When I point that out to her, she gives me a sheepish grin. "Well, ya see, ah also know ya won't go meetin' ponies unless yer gettin' paid for it, so ah do have an angle."

"I should have fucking figured. I refuse. I don't need to meet more ponies, and I _certainly _have no interest in meeting children. I hate kids!" I snap irritably, my spirits sinking. Here I thought I could just do my damn job and not deal with bullshit.

"Uh...there ain't no goats aroun' here," Applejack responds haltingly, causing me to slap my palm into my face and groan.

"I mean foals. Fucking...I'm never going to get used to this. Ponies as the apex race. This is just ridiculous," I keep muttering, hating every second of this life I'm now living. A sinking feeling pervades my mind as Applejack gains a devious expression.

"Well, ya _can _refuse but if ya do, ya won't get paid for today," she points out. I can feel the blood rushing to my face as my irritation gives way to anger. My hands clench into fists, and it takes every fiber of my willpower not to beat the lights out of this fucking pony.

"_You..!" _I snarl, but then I force myself to take a deep breath. She's still my boss. She can fire me if I start insulting her. Fuck you, Applejack. This isn't fair. It should be my choice whether or not I meet other ponies. I feel like every single damn pony is trying to force me to make friends, and it's getting on my nerves. I hated practically the entire human race, and these ponies are exactly like them. They just do a better job of hiding it.

"Fine. Don't think I'll forget this," I force out. Applejack's smile grows at my acquiescence, and then she gestures to Apple Bloom, who approaches me timidly. "Let's go."

"Have a good day, sugarcube!" Applejack calls after her sister as we leave the farm. Apple Bloom returns the sentiment, but a little bit more reserved. Seems she's reluctant to be alone with me. Finally, a pony with some fucking sense.

We walk in silence for a good five minutes, crossing the river and moving into the town itself, before something actually happens. "So...Mr. Rogers...are ya-" she begins.

"Shut up and keep walking," I cut across her with an iron hard voice. Apple Bloom falls silent for a moment, looking hurt.

"But how will ya find yer way to the schoolhouse?" she asks me curiously. Oh goddammit...fucking foals and their bullshit.

"Fine. Don't talk about anything else," I relent, but only slightly. It's better if I can alienate most of these ponies early on, or they'll think I'm worth knowing. I never liked it when a human would get too involved in my business, and I certainly don't like it when _ponies _do the same.

Apple Bloom obediently keeps quiet, unless it's to give me directions on where to go. However, this world seems to have it out for me, so our companionable silence only lasts for a short while before we're interrupted.

"Apple Bloom!" exclaims a young, high pitched voice. I turn my head to see another filly, this one a white unicorn with a curly pink and lavender mane and tail, running towards us from a nearby hill.

"Ignore her. We have places to..." I start, but Apple Bloom is already dashing to meet the other filly halfway. "...be. Goddamn fillies."

"Sweetie Belle! Good mornin'!" Apple Bloom cries back happily, and the two of them nuzzle one another lovingly. That...was a little cute. But the interference is still annoying. Besides, what kind of name is Sweetie Belle anyway?

Speaking of which, Sweetie Belle is looking at me now, looking curious. "Hey Apple Bloom," she says uncertainly. Trotting over to me, Sweetie Belle sniffs around me curiously, gazing up at me. She doesn't seem to notice how I'm glowering at her. "What is this thing?"

"This thing has a name," I snap at her. My voice causes Sweetie Belle to yelp and fall back on her haunches. "It's Seth Rogers. Now can you get lost so I can get this blasted filly to school?"

"Um...well...I'm g-going to school too," Sweetie Belle stammers, shocked by my speaking ability and my vehemence. "My sister is taking me...but she's being slow. Rarity!"

Oh, as if this day couldn't get any worse. Now I have to deal with that prissy stuck up mare from the party. I can already see her, with that perfectly styled mane that pisses me off for no good reason. At least she's not wearing that frilly dress from before.

"In due time, Sweetie Belle. Perfection can't be rushed, you see," Rarity answers with a smile, indicating her mane with a flourish. I can't help but facepalm, chuckling a bit. Ponies styling their hair. If that isn't the dumbest thing I've seen so far, I don't know what is.

Rarity stops when she sees me, her eyes narrowing. She adopts an expression of distaste. "Oh...it's you," she grumbles.

"You don't seem pleased to see me," I comment dryly, not really caring one way or another. The fillies are watching us in confusion, probably not realizing that we know one another.

"Of course not. How could a lady such as I enjoy the sight of such an ill-mannered ruffian?" Rarity huffs in response. That earns a scathing laugh from me. She tilts her head to one side. "Pardon, I seem to be missing the joke."

"The joke is that the miniature white horse thinks it's a lady," I choked out between laughs. This is just too great. Please do another flourish so I can laugh some more. Rarity's affronted look just makes me laugh even harder.

"Hey! Quit picking on my sister! She's the most elegant mare I know!" Sweetie Belle is actually the one that yells at me first, surprisingly enough. I stop laughing, transfixing the filly with a glare.

"Or what? Clearly you ponies don't know a predator when you see one," I say in a dangerously soft voice, and then I smile, revealing my canines. Sweetie Belle gulps and takes a step back, while Rarity steps in front of her protectively. I turn around, ignoring them both and nudging Apple Boom with my foot. "Let's get moving. I have shit to do today that doesn't involve taking fucking fillies to school."

"But...ah wanna be with Sweetie Belle..." Apple Bloom protests weakly, though she does follow me. Good, I don't want to drag her.

"You'll see her at school, and then I don't care what you do," I rebuff her uncaringly, turning down a different street to keep Rarity from following us. Thanks to Apple Bloom, I have a general idea of where I'm supposed to go, so I'm going to take the long route.

"You were so nice back at the house," Apple Bloom whispers, hanging her head as she follows me listlessly. "Did ah maybe...do somethin' wrong?

A twinge of guilt strikes me at how seemingly depressed I've made her. Dammit, this isn't what I wanted. I just wanted her to back off so she didn't think I was her friend. You know, I want her to hate me so she won't bother talking to me, for her own sake. Right now though, I think I screwed up. It looks like she's blaming herself for my being an ass to her. Dammit, having a conscience really sucks sometimes.

"No, Apple Bloom. You didn't do anything. I'm just an asshole, that's all. Don't bother with me," I admit with a sigh. Apple Bloom looks up in surprise and confusion.

"A what now?" she questions curiously. I facepalm. Right, she's still a filly. Well, I already knew I'm a terrible person.

"A guy who's not fun at all to be around," I reiterate with a deadpan expression. Apple Bloom makes a small sound of understanding, but she still doesn't look cheered up. Fuckin'...how do I do this? I would make a terrible parent. Finally, I have an idea, but I don't like it at all. Do children really like this? Because if they don't I'll feel really stupid. "Fuck it, come here."

Apple Bloom squeaks in surprise as I scoop her up in my arms. She doesn't weigh all that much, at least not compared to the rest of the shit I've carried recently. "You will not breathe a word of this to Applejack, you hear me?" I grumble to her as I drape her over me such that her front hooves are resting over my shoulder, and her back legs are hanging down my front. My right arm holds her up, while my left holds the rifle and strap. "Now just cheer up already."

"Whoa...this is really cool! Ah can see so much from here!" Apple Bloom exclaims as we walk through the streets towards the school. She's craning her head around excitedly, trying to see as much as she can.

The things I do to make myself feel better...

Soon, the schoolhouse comes into view. It looks...nothing like a school building I'm used to. Fuck, it looks like something out of the 1960s, being only a one room schoolhouse made of wood and plaster. It's colored bright red and white, and there's a heart motif over the windows, the doors, and on the back of the gently turning weather-vane at the top of the building, above the bell tower. Because a one room schoolhouse needs a fucking bell. Go figure.

There are a lot of fillies running around outside the building, more than likely having gotten there earlier than us. Ugh, I can see Rarity there. I went slow on purpose so she'd have enough time to get here and leave...but it seems I didn't give her enough time.

When Rarity sees me walking towards the school with Apple Bloom over my shoulder, she does a double take. I groan inwardly as I see her trotting up to me. I ignore her at first, instead lifting Apple Bloom off my shoulder and gently placing her on the ground. "We're here, Apple Bloom," I tell her, brushing loose pony fur off of my shoulder.

"Thanks, Mr. Rogers. You ain't so bad!" Apple Bloom expresses happily, and then to my shock, she nuzzles my leg.

"Of course I am. Didn't you hear me say so?" I remind her, but she doesn't seem very convinced.

"Eh, ah don't think ya really mean ta be," Apple Bloom responds, and then she meets Sweetie Belle, the two of them nuzzling one another, though I don't miss the worried look Sweetie sends my way.

"But...I...what?" I can only stammer at Apple Bloom's words. Of course I mean to be an asshole! But...fucking...these ponies don't make any sense.

"Ahem. Mr. Rogers, is it?" Rarity addressed me, gazing at me with an look I can't decipher.

"Call me Seth," I tell her, wondering what she wants now. I slide my free hand into my pocket.

"Yes, well. Seth, were you just carrying that filly?" she asks, causing me to shut my eyes and groan. I should have known this was coming. Why did I do that again?

"So what if I did? What does it matter to you?" I lash out defensively, averting my eyes. This is what I get for doing something nice. This is why I'm _never_ nice.

"Hm. Perhaps there's more to you than I first suspected, darling," Rarity says with an ever so slight hint of surprise on her face. What? No, no, stop! Don't get interested...just back off, I'm an asshole who doesn't warrant your attention!

"Sure whatever. I'm going back to the farm now," I grunt, turning away from Rarity before she can spout more inane remarks.

"Aren't ya gonna come meet Miss Cheerilee?" Apple Bloom asks me in a pleading voice. I look at her, a harsh rebuttal forming on the tip of my tongue, but then I see the look she's giving me. Her lower lip is poking out ever so slightly, and her eyes are all wide and liquid.

"Ugh, fine! I'm so tired of this shit," I relent with bad grace. I curse quietly to myself as a much happier looking Apple Bloom leads me towards the school, Sweetie Belle following once Rarity bids her farewell. Can't believe I'm got suckered into this by some filly acting cute. This is the last time I'm giving in. The moment I get enough money to get a place of my own, I'm locking myself in there and never coming out. Good luck finding me then, you blasted ponies.

"Apple Bloom, Sweetie Belle!" Another voice, female and rough, calls to us. Great, they're multiplying. This new filly is orange, and has a scruffy purple mane and tail. That has to be the weirdest color scheme ever. Those two colors just don't look good together, but here's a pony to prove my preconceptions of life completely wrong. Apparently that's par for the course in this fucked up world.

"Mornin' Scootaloo!" Apple Bloom calls to the orange filly, who seems to be another of her friends. The three of them gather together in a small circle and start whispering to one another. Finally, Scootaloo notices that I exist, and her eyes widen. As she opens her mouth to ask her questions, I beat her to it.

"I'm a human, named Seth Rogers. Yes, I talk, and no, I won't be your friend," I answer the unformed questions that I'm sure she's about to ask me. Judging by the shocked look on her face, I think I guessed right.

"Wow...I hadn't even asked anything yet. Are you psychic too?" Despite my questions, Scootaloo still found a way to ask me a question.

"Yes, I'm definitely psychic. I can read every thought running through that tiny little head of yours," I say sarcastically. It seems like she's taking me seriously, though if the way she's stepping away from me is any indication. I give a short sigh. "Of course I'm not fucking psychic. Don't be stupid."

"Oh...heh, I wasn't worried anyway," Scootaloo replies uncertainly. Well, that's a lie if I've ever seen one. Why don't you just hold up a sign that says, "LOOK AT ME, I'M AN OBVIOUS LIAR?" Might make it harder for me to figure you out. "So my name is Scootaloo. You're Seth, right?"

"I did just get through saying that," I point out irritably. Scootaloo gives me an angry stare.

"You know, you sound like Diamond Tiara," she accuses. I blink. What the fuck? Diamond tiara? What the hell does that mean? How can I sound like an inanimate object?

"Hush, Scoots. He's jus' different, is all. He's really a nice human," Apple Bloom intervenes, earning a scoff from me and an incredulous look from Scootaloo.

"Don't listen to her. She doesn't know what she's talking about," I tell Scootaloo, who nods in agreement. That's fine. At least this pony is willing enough to hate me. "Now where's this Cheerilee? I want to get back to work."

"Miss Cheerilee? She's just inside. Hurry up and go home already," Scootaloo tells me with a scowl. I actually grin at her words. It's about time somepony did the smart...did I really just write that? These ponies are influencing me. I'm half hoping something will kill me before that happens.

I walk into the school building, where some ponies are already inside and sitting at their desks. I notice that most of them are fillies, though there are a few colts, some of which look fucking ridiculous. All of them look up at my approach, including the fully grown mare standing behind a wooden desk.

"Oh. I heard that there was a human in town, but I didn't really believe it," the mare gasps, gazing at me in awe. She walks out from behind her desk so that I can see her clearly. Her fur is a dark raspberry color, but her mane and tail are two different shades of a light pink. For a butt tattoo, she's got three smiling flowers. Whatever the hell that means. "Would you care to tell me your name, sir?"

"I'm Seth Rogers, but I only want to be called Seth," I answer her, not sure what to make of her. She did treat me with some respect though, and that's enough for me not to automatically hate her.

"I'm very pleased to meet you, Seth. My name is Cheerilee, and I am the teacher here. It's an honor for me to meet a real human." Cheerilee approaches me and holds out her hoof to me, clearly wanting to shake. Out of principle, I take her hoof, and unlike Applejack, she gives me one gentle shake and then releases me. "Welcome to Ponyville!"

"Thanks, I guess. I'd rather be back with others of my own kind, but apparently I'm the only one left," I admit, returning my hand back to my pocket. Cheerilee's eyes widen, and then soften as she gazes at me with pity in her eyes. I scoff and turn around. Apple Bloom, Sweetie Belle, and Scootaloo are cantering in through the door just as I'm leaving. "I did what you wanted, Apple Bloom. I'm leaving now."

"Okay Mr. Rogers. Thanks for taking me to school today," the filly calls after me as I stride out the door, leaving the classroom and a very confused Cheerilee behind. I acknowledge Apple Bloom with a wave of my hand.

Just before I can get out of the premises, I run into two more fillies, who make it very clearly that they want to talk to me by positioning themselves right in front of me.

The first one is colored a light pink with a lavender and white mane and tail. Her eyes are a light blue, and she's wearing a...oh, so this must be Diamond Tiara, considering she's wearing one. The other pony is colored a delicate silver, with her mane and tail being an even lighter shade of gray.. This one...snrk...is wearing light blue glasses over her purple eyes (wtf?) and a necklace of...wow, those are pearls. So are these the resident rich kids?

"Why hello there! I couldn't help but notice you talking to those three blank flanks earlier," Diamond Tiara addresses me, speaking in an educated manner. Her voice is high pitched, but at least it's more tolerable than Pinkie's voice. "Are you, by any chance, friends of theirs?"

"Are you kidding me? Not in the slightest. I have no need for their friendship," I asserted, wondering what these two fillies want with me. I also wonder why they called Apple Bloom and her friends "blank flanks". Were they referring to the fact that neither of them had their butt tattoos yet?

Diamond Tiara beams at me. Apparently what I said was what she wanted to hear. "Excellent! I'm Diamond Tiara. I'm pleased to meet you," she proclaims, doing a weird little curtsy. "You know, Silver Spoon and I have always wanted to see what a real human looked like."

"Uh-huh. So you thought you'd come and stare at me?" I accuse, crossing my arms. "Well, that's tough. I'm not in the mood to be a zoo exhibit."

Diamond Tiara's smile becomes strained at that point, and I can see the disbelief in her eyes. I think I hit the nail on the head in my previous assessment of them. She doesn't seem like she's used to not getting what she wants.

"Are you sure you can't take a minute to talk with me?" she tries again after thinking for a bit.

"Pretty sure, thanks. I'm leaving now," I assert, turning on my heel and walking away. She doesn't give up so easily, however.

"You know, I think you should change your mind. My father is one of the richest ponies in Equestria," Diamond Tiara insists. That gets me to stop. That sounded suspiciously like a threat. I turn my head slightly and glare at her from one eye.

"What a fucking joke. Like I'm really going to submit to threats. I don't have anything to lose, so tell him to knock himself out,' I snap at her, and then without looking to see her reaction, I stalk away, glad to finally be on my way back to work.

Fucking Applejack, making me meet a bunch of ponies that I'll never care about. But of course, if I had refused her, it would have hurt me in the long run. Like, not being able to pay for my rent. Speaking of pain...why is it that I feel a strange sense of dread falling over me?

"My turn my turn MY TURN!" Wait, whose voice is tha...JESUS CHRIST! For a split second, I see a flash of pink cover my entire field of view, and then something rams into my shoulder like a battering ram, knocking me clear off my feet and onto my back. "Aw, you're supposed to hold me up, silly billy!"

"Pinkie...what the hell are you doing?!" I groan while looking up at the sky. I don't even need to look to know who it was on top of me. "Get the fuck off of me!"

I shove Pinkie aside, who squeaks and giggles in surprise as she falls over as well. "Sethie! I saw you carrying Apple Bloom and it looked really fun so I want to try it too, so can I try it please?" Pinkie spouts off, hopping back onto her four hooves and then proceeding to bounce up and down excitedly. I hoist myself to my feet again, my right eye twitching.

"Okay, first off, don't you ever call me 'Sethie' again. Secondly, Apple Bloom is a filly, and is more feasible for me to carry. Thirdly, why, oh god why, would you think I would be willing to do the same to _you, _of all ponies?!" I rave at her, my voice rising in volume to the point where the other ponies in the streets are starting to look over at us curiously.

"Oh, that's easy! It's because I'm your bestest friend in the whole wide world! Come on, it'll be fun!" Pinkie doesn't seem fazed at all by how angry I sound. If anything, she's getting even more hype doff, judging by that huge smile on her face. How many times do I have to shoot them down before they realize I'm not worth the effort?

"No! How many times do I have to tell you fuckers?! You're not my best friend. You're not even my friend," I deny vehemently. Pinkie's smile drops and her ears flatten. I can see her open her mouth to reply, but I'm not done. "I don't consider any of the ponies here my friends, and I doubt I ever will. So the sooner you stop trying, the happier the both of us will feel. Am I clear?"

"Is it because I haven't thrown you a party yet? Because if so I'm really really sorry, and I can right on making one you'll enjoy, and-" Pinkie wails, but again, I don't let her finish. Nothing out of this mare's mouth will ever make sense.

"Would you shut up? No, I don't hate you because you haven't thrown me a party. I don't want a party. No, I hate you because you're wild, uncontrollable, annoying, and lastly, because I hate everyone. You're not special in that regard," I storm. I feel a bit guilty, because I know that this is probably one of my most vicious and personal tirades I've made so far, and it's working. Pinkie's expression is getting more and more distraught every second. Surprisingly enough, her mane and tail seems to have straightened out for some reason, the frizziness just smoothing out and disappearing.

"Why...why do you hate everypony, when we haven't done anything but try to be kind to you?" Pinkie whimpers, and I feel another pang of guilt when I notice tears squeezing out from her eyes and trickling down her cheeks. Holy shit, I drove her to tears. I think I may have gone too far to prove my point. There's no backing out now, though.

"That doesn't matter. What does matter, is that you and all of your little pony friends should just give up. I'm not worth your time and effort. Just pretend I don't exist, and we'll get along just fine," I answer her. Pinkie gazes at me for a few seconds longer in silence, and then she turns the other way and runs off, sniffing loudly.

I turn around back towards my destination, and notice that several ponies are staring at me with expressions of anger, sadness, and disapproval on their faces. "That was wholly unnecessary," one mare growls, actually daring to talk to me.

"Like I care," I scoff, shoving past them and continuing on my way.

I'm lying. I do care. I care a lot. I'm sorry I had to hurt her so much just to get her to give up, but I'm not sorry about what I accomplished. I can't make friends here. I just can't. Pinkie seems like the sort of personality I would have enjoyed associating with a long time ago, before my faith in humanity was crushed. I can't trust her now. And even if I could, I would still hold her at arms length.

I won't lose all of my friends again.

* * *

I am so sorry, Pinkie. I really wish I could give you special treatment, really I do, but that would be out of character for our "model citizen", Seth.

Anyhow, the next arc begins, and I got to introduce a bunch of characters to Seth that he hadn't met yet, but wasn't able to give them a lot of screen time. Sometimes it really sucks to write an asshole character, because then he never wants to spend time with anypony, so they don't get much development.

I wish I could draw. I would totally draw Seth, and then a picture of Seth carrying Apple Bloom over his shoulder. I enjoyed writing that scene so much :3


	9. Restored Livelihood

Once again, I'm reminded of how much I hate hard work. Right now, they have me repairing a small storage shed that got damaged in the storm last night, while we had all been partying. Applejack is still gone on her delivery, so Big MacIntosh and I are the only ones here, along with that older pony who I think is still inside. As such, I consider the giant red pony to be my new boss until Applejack returns.

He's very quiet, responding mostly in short sentences that are maybe five or six words at the most. That makes it very easy for me to work, since now I don't have Applejack trying to talk to me every few minutes. Big MacIntosh actually trusts me to get the job done, as he rarely sticks around for more than a minute before he moves on to complete other chores around the farm.

I regard the shed in front of me. There's a jagged hole on the top of it that is slightly singed, likely because of lightning. I don't think these ponies know what lightning rods are, because I have yet to see one. Though...that makes me wonder how this village hasn't burnt down yet. I swear, if it's something as stupid as a "lightning repelling spell" or something, I'm going to groan.

To fix this, I'm probably going to have to remove the singed boards from the top of the shed, because burnt wood is much weaker than usual, and that's never good for a storage shed. Winter is coming, so we need the food supplies to be nice and protected from the elements.

I pick up the hammer from the ground next to me and use the curved portion to pry the broken boards off of the shed. Thankfully I don't have to do any of the wood carving and shaving myself, as Big MacIntosh had provided me with a lumber pile with boards and planks of various sizes. I think there's some replacement boards in there that I can use.

After a short period of me comparing board sizes to the holes I need to fill, I start to get the real repairs done. I have some experience with nail and hammer work, because I was a freak for posters in my dorm back in college, so it's not that hard to get the boards nailed in properly without hurting myself.

All right, the shed is repaired. Now all I need is to paint the boards to look like the rest of the shed. Out of the corner of my eye, I see Big MacIntosh passing behind me, so I turn my head and get his attention. "Hey, do you know where I can get some paint for this?"

"In the barn, on the shelves," is his terse answer, and then he moves on to his next chore, whatever that is. You know, I really like working under this guy.

A quick trip to the barn later, and I return to the shed with two buckets of paint: one red and one white. This part is easy. Reading about this is about as boring as watching paint dry...no pun intended.

When I finish, the shed looks as good as new, and I can return the paint buckets to their shelves. If I thought my clothes were bad before, they're now even worse. My jeans have paint spatters all over them. My mother would have freaked. I really need a new set of clothes. Maybe I'll use the four bits I'll have left over from today's pay to get some, if I can find them cheap enough...wait, what am I talking about? I live with _ponies. _They're not going to have clothes for humans.

After finding Big MacIntosh again, he gives me some more work to do. This time, he has me doing more menial chores, like sweeping the barn clean, and washing the exterior walls. It's a pain in the ass, but I am getting paid for all of this work.

You know, what with all the activity, I've lost track of the days. I think it was Wednesday when I was transported to the future, but I have no idea what day it is now. Are the ponies like us, where they have their school five days a week, and then two days off for weekends? Because if so, today should be Monday, because Apple Bloom hadn't been at school yesterday.

Then I get the worst job in the world right after that: pulling fucking weeds. Ugh, I remember how I used to pitch a fit when I was a kid whenever my mother would make me do that. I think the people in the neighboring suburbs could hear my angry screams. But I wasn't getting paid for it back then, so I can't complain now.

It's long, hard, and backbreaking work, especially for someone like me, who before yesterday had never done a real day's work in his life. By the time I'm finished, Applejack is back with an empty cart, having finished delivering all those foodstuffs or whatever it was she was transporting. I don't really care.

"Howdy there, Seth! Workin' hard?" Applejack greets me, breaking the blissful silence that I had been working in for hours now. I shoot her a baleful glance, and then I stand up and stretch, groaning as my back cracks.

"No, I've been playing chess with Granny Smith, can't you tell by how I'm drowning in sweat?" I remark sarcastically, adjusting my now stringy hair and wiping my forehead off. Applejack chuckles slightly and moves past me.

"Well, you kin rest now, yer done. Come inside fer a moment," Applejack tells me, and I sigh in relief. Life is going to suck if I have to do this every day. Grabbing the rifle and strap from its spot leaning against the barn, I follow her into the barn as she pulls the cart inside and unstraps herself from it. She does a little stretching over her own. Ponies seem a lot more limber in Equestria than the ones I know. I don't think our ponies had ball joints attached to their hooves and legs.

When she's done, she canters into the living area, where Big MacIntosh is dusting behind a few of the paintings, and Granny Smith is actually awake...and she actually takes notice of me.

"So yer the fine new worker Applejack's been tellin' me about!" she exclaims upon seeing me in a really creaky old voice. I don't know what I expected. "Yer an odd lookin' thang. What are ya, anyway?"

"I'm human, and I could say the same thing about you, considering the first time I've seen a pony was about three days ago," I reply in a bored tone. Tiredly, I rest my back against the wall and cross my arms.

"Hyomin? What in tarnation is that?" Granny Smith repeats, horribly mispronouncing my species name.

"They're an advanced species that were lost three thousand years ago." Big MacIntosh is the one who answers, much to my surprise. Not only was that the longest sentence I've ever heard him say, but he also knows what I am.

"Now that, ah didn't know," Applejack chimes in, gazing at me in a new light, while Granny Smith peers at me in interested.

"Ya look mighty good for three thousand," the old pony notes. The misunderstanding earns a smile from Big MacIntosh and a chuckle from Applejack, while I just facepalm.

"I'm not actually three thousand. I'm twenty one. Magic brought me here. That's my story in a nutshell," I explain briefly, realizing only after I finish talking that I hadn't actually told anyone other than Zecora how I got here. They're all regarding me curiously. "Don't ask me for the full story, because I don't feel like telling."

"Ah, that's raht disappointin'. You soun' like ya got quite the tale ta tell there," Applejack remarks with a sigh. "Anyhow, ah'll be raht back. Gotta git yer money."

Applejack leaves the area, trotting upstairs with a purpose, leaving me in the room with Granny Smith and Big MacIntosh. I glance at the latter. "I assume you've read those books I've heard so much about?" I inquire.

"Eeyup," is his telling response.

" Are they any good?"

"Eeyup."

"Huh. I think I need to read them, if only to make fun of how wrong they are," I quip, while Big MacIntosh just nods.

"There are books about hyomins? Why does nopony ever tell me these things?" Granny Smith asks with mild frustration in her voice. Without waiting for a reply, she returns to a rocking chair and sits back in it with a sigh. Let me tell you, it's really odd to see a pony sit.

"Humans, Granny Smith," Big MacIntosh corrects her, pronouncing my species name perfectly. Seems like this pony is smarter than he lets on. I'll have to remember that.

A few moments later, the front door opens, and Apple Bloom rushes in excitedly, clearly happy to be out of school for the day. Behind her are her two friends Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo. "Evenin' everypony! Ah'm home!" Apple Bloom declares, running up to her brother first. The two of them nuzzle one another affectionately, and then the filly does the same with Granny Smith.

When Apple Bloom notices that I'm here as well, she gives me a warm smile, and then she moves over to me and nuzzles me as well, despite the indifferent look I'm giving her. "Hello, Mr. Rogers! How was yer day today?" she asks me while showing me a happy expression.

"I prefer to be called Seth. And to answer you, it could have been worse, I suppose," I answer casually. I don't know what it is about this filly, but I can't bring myself to be cold to her.

"Apple Bloom! Welcome home, sis," Applejack rejoins, having returned from upstairs with a sack of jingling bits on her back. I move closer to her expectantly, but I have to wait as the sisters physically greet one another.

"Hey, Apple Bloom? I need to get back home to Rarity," Sweetie Belle informs her friend with a reluctant expression. I notice how she pointedly avoids my gaze when I turn to look at her.

"Okay! Ah'll see y'all tomorrow then," Apple Bloom acknowledges. She gives Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo a wave of her hoof, which they return before they trot out of sight. "So what's fer dinner, Applejack?"

"Jus' a minute, Apple Bloom. This is fer y'all, Seth." Applejack turns to me, her mouth clamping around the neck of the sack. She levers the money over to my open palm, which then closes around the bag. Pulling the bag back, I immediately move towards the door, ready to get moving. "Hey, would ya like ta stay fer dinner?"

I stop. Did she really just ask me that again? Does she expect me to suddenly change my mind overnight? "No, I wouldn't. If you'll excuse me," I reply coldly, and then I open the door and step outside into the rapidly chilling air.

"Okay," I hear Applejack say just before the door shuts behind me. Out of all the ponies I've met so far, Applejack has to be one of the most confusing. She keeps being friendly, and then doesn't get offended when I rebuff her. I don't know what to think about that.

I'm on my own again. So far, I have several things on my list. Firstly, I need to get some food. Secondly, I want to visit Twilight again, because I really want to ask about the pegasi and their cloud maneuvering, as well as why some ponies don't have butt tattoos. And then there's Sombra, of course. I think she should have had enough time to find something on him by now. Lastly, I need to visit that place Vinyl told me about. What did she call it? The Carousel Boutique? Why does that sound familiar?

Suddenly, it hits me. Rarity said before at the party that she runs a business there. Fuck...this isn't going to be fun. I guess I'd better get that out of the way first. At least Rarity is less trouble than Pinkie to deal with.

I push forward towards town, feeling satisfied with that extra money jingling around in my hand. Peeking into the bag, I notice that I had earned ten bits, just as I'd expected. That'll be enough to pay my rent, and leave me four bits left over for food and commodities. It's not perfect, but I'm starting to make something of a living here in this ridiculous land of ponies.

If I remember right, Rarity said her place was southwest of the town square, on the hill. That means it should be to my left...yep, there's the hill. I assume the Boutique must be that large purple building that looks a lot like a frilly circus tent. Heh, I bet she'd kill me if I mentioned that to her. I'll keep that in mind. Chances are I'll be in an argument with her the moment I get inside.

I don't want to walk all the way across the river and through the square, because that seems like a really long way to walk. Haven't these ponies heard the theory that the shortest route between point A and point B is a straight fucking line?

Apparently they have. After craning my head around, I notice a separate bridge that crosses the river there, though it goes off the path and through a small park that terminates at the bottom of Carousel Hill. Whether it's actually called that or not, I don't give a fuck. That's its name now.

Not long after veering from the path towards the bridge, I catch the faintest hint of music. I stop, wondering if I'm going even more crazy than I already am.

No, I'm not crazy. I definitely hear music. It almost sounds like a harp, but there's some subtle differences in the sound. Holy fuck, that's...that's beautiful. Fuck Rarity, I need to hear some more of this amazing music.

I do my best to follow the sound to its source, walking across the river and into the park, where there's a carved water fountain in the clearing, topped with the statue of a pony that's rearing its forelegs up in the air. There aren't any other ponies here...except for one.

Just in front of the fountain, facing away from me, there's a familiar mint green unicorn standing there. A golden lyre hangs just in front of her, being held aloft by a soft green magical aura. Its strings seemingly strum themselves, releasing a calming and sad melody that has me rooted to the spot, unable to do anything other than stand there, listening.

I close my eyes and let the melody carry me away to a different time, forgotten memories floating to the surface of my consciousness.

I remember when my mother took Adam and I to an amusement park for my birthday, when I was still in middle school. I hadn't wanted to go at all, because I considered those kinds of places to be childish and beneath me. My mother took us anyway, and it was there she forced me onto my first roller coaster, of which I was incredibly afraid. After going down the first hill, I remember being able to let go and enjoy myself, and from then on, I had a blast with my family at that park, trying every ride at least once, and eating sweets until we were stuffed. Then, after the most intense ride in the park, Adam lost his hat, but it didn't matter in the end. We ended up taking a picture together afterward, where Adam and I were smiling and embracing one another, while our mother stood behind us, her proud smile and bright eyes betraying her happiness. I had kept that photo with me forever, and had been in my dorm until the day I disappeared.

I remember the day Amaryllis and I took our first trip together, the both of us having finally acknowledged our friendship after denying it for a month. We had gone to a beach several hours away, but the water had been too cold to stay in for very long. While we were swimming, Amaryllis discovered a small sandy area hidden behind a large rock formation, out of sight of the common populace, as well as the life guards. We had stayed there past closing time, watching the sun set and listening to the waves crash against the shore together. We didn't have to speak; it was enough knowing that for once in our lives, we didn't have to be alone.

I choke a bit, my eyes watering. I can't help myself. The song has brought up so many feelings that I would rather keep hidden, and as such I can't keep the tears from leaking out of my eyes, silently traveling down my cheeks.

I wipe my eyes as the song comes to an end, but it doesn't really do any good. As the last notes fade away into the air, I'm left feeling empty. As much as I try to muffle it, a faint sob escapes me. It's very quiet, but it's enough to catch the attention of Lyra, who whirls around in surprise, placing her lyre on her back. I immediately turn away, but I'm not quick enough to keep her from seeing my tear streaked face for a split second. There's an awkward silence, as neither one of us knows what to say to the other.

"Hey," Lyra says softly, her voice sounding kind. I don't answer at first, as I'm frantically trying to compose myself so I don't look like a complete idiot. I hear her hooves clopping against the ground as she moves closer to me. "Are you all right?"

"Of course I am," I answer quickly, hoping that she will take the hint and drop it. "Why wouldn't I be?"

"Heh, no reason, I guess," Lyra replies, trotting to my side, where she gazes up at me. I adjust the position on my head a little, such that my hair covers the side of my face that she can see. Lyra gives me a warm, heartfelt smile, and she places a hoof on my leg in what I guess she thinks is a comforting manner. "Thank you for being such a good listener."

"Whatever...but you're not bad," I compliment her, shifting away from her touch uncomfortably. My praise causes her smile to become a happy grin. "I didn't know you were a musician."

"My cutie mark is a lyre for a reason, silly," Lyra teases me, her grin turning cheeky. I scoff a bit, even though I know she's right.

"I noticed your damn butt tattoo, thank you. Excuse me for not knowing their significance," I snap at her, feeling a little stupid. Somehow, I feel like I said something wrong, as Lyra's cheeks color a bit at my words.

"Trust you to be looking at my butt." Lyra's retort causes me to choke. That's an answer I didn't expect. She's still blushing...oh dear god this pony is fucking flirting with me. Kill me now.

"Fuck you," I grunt, not amused in the least. Lyra takes a step closer, giggling a little, apparently finding my hateful response to be amusing.

"Doesn't that just prove my point?" she counters with a bit of a sultry expression on her face.

"Ugh!" I groan, pushing my way past her roughly, her giggles erupting into full blown laughter. "I'm leaving. I have places to be."

"Okay, I'm sorry! But you shouldn't make it so easy for me." Lyra calls after me, but I don't stop moving. "Seth? I was just kidding, please don't be mad!"

Too late. I'm more than just mad. I'm disgusted. A _pony _just tried flirting with me. I'm...I'm just fucking done. How the fuck does sexual attraction work in this world anyway? Do they not even care that to them I'm essentially a hairless monkey? Besides, how would it even...UGH! Just...fuck this, and fuck you, Lyra.

I leave a distraught Lyra behind as I climb the hill to the Carousel Boutique, dreading the coming meeting with Rarity. Hopefully I can just get in and out without much trouble. Yeah...if there's one think I've learned about living in this land, it's that the ponies _always _give me trouble.

When I get up to the building, I find that I'm directly behind it. There's a tree on the left of me, and there are clotheslines stretched between the branches of the tree and the side of the building, damp clothing hanging from them, swaying in the slight breeze. There's a door back here as well, but I doubt Rarity would appreciate it if I barged in through the back door.

I duck underneath the clotheslines and continue around to the front of the building. Goddamn, this place is so frilly and colorful. How the hell do the ponies live near it without all of these colors hurting their eyes? Probably because they're so damn colorful themselves.

I give the front door a few raps with my knuckles, and then I wait, somewhat impatiently. "Comiiing!" I hear Rarity call in a singsong voice from within. Not long afterward, the unicorn opens the door, and her pupils widen almost imperceptibly when she sees me. "Oh...Seth? Is there something I can do for you?"

I'm about to answer when I notice that Lyra had climbed up the hill behind me. Why the fuck was she still chasing me? Hadn't I already made it clear that I didn't want to be anywhere near her? "Yeah, actually," I say quickly, and then much to Rarity's surprise, I zip inside the Boutique and shut the door, locking it behind me.

"What ever is the matter, darling? You look like you've seen a ghost," Rarity observes, seemingly unperturbed that I had just invited myself inside without really asking.

"Yes, if one defines a ghost as a lyre playing unicorn that wants me to fuck her," I answer, peering out through the small window set into the door. Yeah, Lyra's still there, and she's looking around for me. She looks pretty depressed for some reason. Whether or not that's actually what she wants is not my problem. All I know is what I perceived, and it was appalling.

Rarity visibly colors at my words, and she opens her mouth to say something, and then shuts it again. After a moment of thinking, she tries again. "Oh...well...ahem. You're...certainly blunt," she comments, shuffling her hooves. "You'll have to forgive Lyra. She's always been...a little eccentric. Especially when it comes to the ancient past."

"Well, that's great and all, but I won't be some conquest for a crazed history lover," I reply. Rarity nods understandingly.

"Perhaps I'll let Bon Bon know you're having trouble. She should take care of it for you," Rarity suggests. I give her a sideways glance. What could she possibly hope to gain from helping me out? I don't want to find out.

"Don't bother. I can take care of it myself," I respond flatly. Rarity looks like she's going to protest, but I don't let her. "Anyway, that's not why I came here."

"Oh? Perhaps you've finally come so that I may design you a better wardrobe? Your...ahem...current attire appears to be covered in dirt and paint," Rarity guesses, looking at me hopefully. She looks disappointed when I scoff.

"Like I have the money for that. No, I'm hear to get this strap fixed to my rifle, so I can sling it around my back." My explanation doesn't seem to stick with her at all.

"Darling, I wouldn't dream of charging you for such a basic request! No pony...or human in your unique case, should be reduced to wearing such grimy clothing." Rarity has an appalled expression upon her face now, as if shocked that I would want to pay her for her work. Also, did she not even hear my true reasons for being here?

"The answer is no. Now will you take the strap already? I do have other places to be today," I tell her firmly, holding out both the rifle and the guitar strap. With a look of restrained frustration, Rarity's horn glows with a light blue aura and the two items levitate out of my hands.

"No need to be rude, dear. It will only take a bit of an adhesive material, of which I have in plentiful supply," she sniffs, and a drawer opens on the opposite side of the room, from which a small bottle zooms out. "If you wouldn't mind, could you tell me where the ends of the strap would be attached? I'm afraid I'm not too familiar with human technology."

"I'd be afraid if you were," I remark dryly, imaging ponies running around with fully functional assault rifles. "Now, I want the strap to be attached to the rifle at the stock and the muzzle."

Rarity gives me a blank expression. Right, she has no knowledge of the proper terminology. Heaving a sigh, I indicate the areas I had mentioned.

The top of the bottle unscrewed itself, revealing a small brush attached to the underside of the cap. An odd fluid that I can't identify glistens from the bristles. I'm guessing that's some kind of glue. Do ponies even having adhesive?

Rarity dabs a tiny bit of the fluid in the places I specified, and then delicately presses the ends of the strap onto them with her magic. "Done," she announces, hovering the rifle back over to me. I glance at it suspiciously.

"Wait, wouldn't it need to-" I begin, but Rarity releases the rifle from her hold. I grab it by the strap out of reflex. Surprisingly, the strap holds. "What the...what is that stuff? How did it dry so fast?"

"Ah, I forget you have no real knowledge of our accomplishments, either," Rarity confesses, and then she hovers up the bottle so that I can look at the label. It's only a second before I remember that I can't read Equestrian. Thankfully, Rarity explains. "This is called Liquid Rock by its producers. Just a little touch of magic, and it hardens!"

"Seems like everything works on fucking magic," I remark with distaste. It seems so unfair that in my era, humans had to work incredibly hard to get the luxuries we did then, and ponies get them just by finding a unicorn and voila. Extending my arm, I flick a single bit over to Rarity. "Here."

Rarity catches the bit with her magic out of reflex. "Darling, I must insist that you keep your money. It was a simple task-"

"Save it. I wish all of you ponies would just admit that you're only helping me so you can gain something from me later. It's embarrassingly obvious at this point," I interrupt, slinging the rifle over my shoulder. The strap is tight enough that it hardly shifts when I move my arms, but loose enough that it doesn't hurt.

Rarity is quiet for a few seconds, as she stares at me with a frown. She walks a bit closer to me, her eyes meeting mine. "Seth, I'm going to make you a new set of clothes. For free," she asserts. The tone of her voice tells me she's not willing to brook any argument. Fuck that, though. I won't let her do this.

"I told you, I don't want-"

"Darling, please. Hear me out." Rarity forestalls my objections by raising a hoof. I glare at her in silence. There's nothing she can say that will make me change my mind. "I don't know why you're so afraid to let others help you. It seems to me as if you're worried that if you do not pay us to assist you, we'll use our favors as a means to extract services from you in the future."

"Finally, a pony that can fucking take a hint," I grumble. Rarity's not finished, however.

"What if I told you that helping you will help me in an immaterial fashion, rather than something as mundane as money?" she poses.

"I would call bullshit. Especially if you're about to say some shit like, 'your happiness is all the payment I need,'" I scoff, crossing my arms. Rarity shakes her head.

"Well, though that is part of it, I know you won't be satisfied with just that," she quite accurately guesses. I roll my eyes. "So let me explain it to you this way. I've been making clothes for ponies all of my life, as it is quite a passion of mine. But the chance to make clothing for something as fantastic as a human is a challenge that I simply cannot resist."

"Uh-huh, just like-" I start, but I'm cut off again, much to my frustration.

"By helping you, Seth, I help myself. Then we would be officially even. Is that acceptable to you?" Rarity finishes, gazing at me hopefully.

I stare back at her. I really don't want to agree, but all I have is this one set of clothes, and it's just going to get progressively filthier and filthier. If I ever have to meet someone important, like the Ponyville mayor, I can't go talking to them wearing this shit. I'd bring a cloud of flies with me.

She does make a very good point, now that I think about it. She _is _getting something out of helping me, but it's a sentiment only an artist can feel. Like, say I was good at drawing. Stuck in my hometown, I'm forced to keep drawing the same style of buildings, the same people, the same environment. But if someone were to offer me a trip to the ocean in return for a favor, I'd grant it in a heartbeat. The chance to draw something new would be an incredibly satisfying experience.

Not to mention she's being honest about what she gains from helping me. I suppose...I'll let her give it a shot. I'll kill her if she double-crosses me, though.

"All right. I'll let you make me some clothes," I relent, and Rarity's expression brightens in an instant. A smile stretches across her face.

"Excellent! Now, darling, if you'll come this way, I need to take some measurements." Rarity gestures for me to follow her. Now that I'm not focusing on her, I can get a good look around this extravagant place.

On my left, there's a set of plum colored curtains that were held open by pink lace, revealing several racks of dresses. Further up that same wall, I can see mirrors and vanities whose purposes I can't fathom. The wall terminates at a staircase that spirals upwards and out of sight.

Scattered around the room are mannequins in the shape of ponies, wearing various sets of clothing. I suppose the term "mannequins" doesn't really apply here. I suppose they'd be called ponyquins or something equally stupid.

On my right, there's a raised area, like a stage. It's surrounded by mirrors and partially enclosed by a wall, in which is set a small door. It was to here that Rarity is telling me to go.

"If you'll step right up there for just a moment," she directs me, and I do so uncomfortably, wondering if this really was a good idea after all. I've never had custom clothes created for me before, so I don't know what this process entails.

A tape measure floats to me from the same drawer where the Liquid Rock had been, courtesy of Rarity's magic. "Would you mind removing your shirt for me?" the unicorn requests. I start, but then I realize she probably can't get proper measurements with all this fabric in the way.

I take the rifle off and set it on the stage next to me. Then it's a simple matter to strip off the grimy piece of fabric from my upper body. I callously toss it aside. Its flight is halted prematurely by Rarity's magic. She wrinkles her nose in distaste at it, and then she hangs it over a rack on the wall, far away from the other clothes on the rack.

I notice Rarity taking in the appearance of my upper body with some interest. Most likely scientifically, since there are a lot of differences in our anatomy. She's probably wondering why I have nipples if I'm male. Well, that's a question I'm not going to answer. I hope she's good at seances, because I'll take most of my secrets to the grave.

The tape measure whirls around me like a yellow whirlwind, taking measurements like the circumference of my neck, the widest part of my chest, and my waist. Then she has me bend my arms, so that she can measure the distance from my shoulder to my wrist. "Hm...winter is coming. Perhaps something long sleeved, then?" Rarity thinks aloud. I'm actually a little impressed. She hardly knows anything about humans, and yet here she is, taking measurements of me like a master. That takes skill. "Now then, if you'll remove your pants?"

"I'm sorry, what?" I ask, hoping that I hadn't heard what I thought I just heard.

"I asked if you would remove your pants, darling. I have some measurements to take on your lower body," Rarity repeats patiently.

"Absolutely not," I deny firmly. Rarity looks taken aback by my response.

"Why ever not? Don't you want your pants to fit you?" she inquires. Right...ponies don't wear clothing regularly. She probably has no idea why I'm stopping her.

"It's a human thing. We don't _ever _remove our lower garments in front of civilized beings, especially when in the presence of the opposite sex," I explain, and then I realize something. Why had I taken the time to explain to her? I pretty much told Zecora to go fuck herself when she asked. So what changed?

"Oh, well then," Rarity responds with a slight blush, having understood my underlying meaning. "I suppose I will simply have to compensate. Remain still, if you please."

I fidget uncomfortably as the end of the tape measure snakes into the hem of my pants and takes the width of my boxers and jeans combined. "Oh, there are two garments layered atop one another," Rarity observes, and then she takes the width of both individually. "There. Now I can proceed."

This is so awkward. I really want to say fuck this and leave, but I really do need new clothes. I suffer in silence as she measures my hips. She then takes the length from my crotch to my heel, as well as the width of my ankles. Then, much to my relief, the tape slides back into the receptacle with a click, and then Rarity places the item back in the drawer.

"Well, that's that!" Rarity proclaims, levitating a sheet of parchment and a quill in front of her, where she starts writing something down, probably the measurements she just took. "I'll get to work on this right away. If you'll come see me first thing in the morning, I should have some outfits ready for you to try on."

"Fine. I'm getting down now," I reply hastily, hopping down from the stage. I grab my shirt from the rack, replacing it on my back. I regret it the moment I do though, because it feels slimy against my skin. I can't help but shudder in revulsion. The rifle is then slung on my back. "I'm going to-"

"Rarity!" a familiar voice calls, and then I hear something galloping down the stairs in the hallway that I can't see. Sweetie Belle emerges, a book in her mouth. She drops the object on the floor in front of Rarity. "I can't seem to figure out this one pro...uh...what's _he _doing here?"

"Just business, dear," Rarity answers her sister with a guarded smile. I'm not so nice, however.

"I'm leaving now, so quit fucking staring at me before I kick your ass back up those stairs," I snap at the filly, causing her to take a step back, while regarding me with confusion.

"But...I don't have a donkey," Sweetie Belle replies haltingly. I groan in annoyance, and then I throw the door open and step outside, slamming it shut behind me. Fucking ponies and their innocence.

Shit, I forgot about Lyra. I throw myself into a bush the moment I catch sight of the mint green unicorn still looking around for me. Just in time too, because Lyra's head jerks around to stare in my direction, probably having heard the rustling of the bush. For the love of god, do not come over here...fuck, she's coming over here. Come on, Seth, think of something.

My hand grabs a rock from the dirt. Locating the nearest tree, I hurl the rock at it through the bush. The rock collides with the bark, making a dull _thunk. _Lyra hears the sound and moves to investigate.

Seizing the moment, I break cover and dash towards the hill. From there, it's a simple matter to slide down it. Or at least, it should have been simple, but my foot catches in a small divot, and I fall flat on my face. My momentum causes my legs to flip over my head, and I slide down to the street, covered in grass stains, my rifle jabbing painfully into my back.

I groan and rise. The first thing I notice are the ponies on the street looking at me with bemused expressions. "Don't you fuckers have anything better to do than stare?" I snap at them irritably. In response the ponies return to what they were doing, some mumbling apologies, while others seem indignant at my rude response. They can be angry all they want. I don't give a fuck.

Now, my next order of business is to find Twilight's library. It looks like I'm near the path I traveled to get to the Ponyville Schoolhouse, which is on the same side of the town as her library. If I follow this road forward and take a left at the intersection, it'll lead me back to the park that I crashed in one night.

I follow the route I laid out in my head without much of note, apart from the few curious ponies shooting me glances when they think I'm not looking. I've gotten used to it by now, and some of the other ponies that I've been seeing regularly seem to be getting used to seeing me in town as well.

After crossing the park, it's a simple matter to find my way to Twilight's library, which towers over all of the other buildings. I knock on the door, and to my surprise, it opens immediately.

A very frazzled looking Twilight greets me, and she heaves a deep sigh of relief upon seeing me. "Seth! Thank goodness you're okay!" she tells me frantically, and then she ushers me inside. I walk inside the library, feeling confused. Why wouldn't I be okay?

I meet the gaze of Spike, who is standing just by a bookshelf. He looks to Twilight, and then back to me. The dragon shakes his head in what seems to be exasperation before he walks to the kitchen.

Okay, now I have a slightly bad feeling about this.

* * *

And the slice of life continues. I never thought this style of writing would ever work for me, as I'm used to writing fight scenes, but SoL has its charms, as odd as it is to admit it.

Major plot point here as well, as Seth finally agrees to let somepony do him a favor.

Leave a comment telling me what you think!


	10. A History Lesson

I don't know what I did to make Twilight so worried. I wonder if she's been freaking out like this all day. I'd talk to her about it, but she's currently on a rant that is starting to get annoying.

"I expected you here hours ago! When you didn't show up I got worried that something may have happened to you, like maybe an accident at work, or maybe you got into trouble somehow!" she fusses, walking back and forth restlessly. I adopt a deadpan expression.

"Twilight..."

"What was I supposed to think when you didn't show up right on the time I put in for your visit on my schedule? What if it were my fault? What if I'd said something to offend you and keep you from ever coming back to talk to me?" she continues, but at this point she's talking mostly to herself.

"Twilight."

"I don't think I'd ever be able to forgive myself if I'd driven you off. I mean, I know I'm not the most social of ponies, but I do really..."

"Goddammit, Twilight! Shut the fuck up!" I yell at her impatiently, startling her into silence. Twilight gulps and looks sheepish. "What the hell is your problem anyway? So what if I had other things to do before coming to you first? That doesn't mean you should freak out like a foal with a crush!"

That line gets an embarrassed blush to form on her face. "I'm sorry, Seth. I just don't know how to handle it when something on my schedule doesn't work out," Twilight admits.

"You don't say," I deadpan. These fucking ponies. I swear, they're all insane. "Anyhow let's get this started. I have a few things I want to know about."

"I suppose that's fair. Do you think you can tell me a bit about humans as well? I'm really curious how your kind lives," Twilight ask, watching for my reaction with a hopeful expression on her face.

"Fuck no. I told you, I'm not telling you ponies anything," I deny her, moving away from the door. Twilight's ears fold back, and she looks disappointed.

"Tea's almost ready!" Spike hollers from the kitchen. Twilight jumps a bit at that, and she looks at the kitchen, visibly surprised.

"But, Spike, I hadn't asked for tea yet," she says, bemused. I hear a chuckle from the kitchen as a response.

"You were going to. You always want tea when a guest shows up," Spike explains, walking back out into the main room.

"I guess you're right," Twilight admits with a sheepish smile. Then she looks back at me. "Come into the kitchen, Seth? I can answer your questions there."

"Fine, whatever," I grunt, following the purple unicorn into the kitchen, which smells of that same tea that I've come to enjoy so much. God, I can't wait, I'm so fucking thirsty. Sweating out half of your body's reserves of water tends to do that to you.

I sit in my usual seat, sighing at the relaxing feeling. If I think about it, this is probably the first time I've sat down all damn day. It feels amazing to be able to relax after a long day like this.

"How did work go today, Seth? You look pretty rough," Twilight observes, resting on her haunches next to the table. I guess she's referring to the state of my clothes. That doesn't stop me from coming up with a way to fuck with her, of course.

Twilight watches me, perplexed, as I reach over to her with my hand. Then she squeaks in protest when I plonk my hand down on her head and start mussing up her mane relentlessly. I stop when her previously immaculately groomed mane is now as untidy as a mop. "And now, so do you," I quip, a triumphant grin on my face.

Spike erupts into hysterics at seeing the state of Twilight's mane. Twilight herself is staring up at the few strands of her mane that are now hanging down over her face. "Seth! That wasn't very nice. I spent thirty minutes tidying that up this morning!" she admonishes me, levitating a mirror and comb to her. She runs the comb through her mane, hoping to fix the damage I caused.

"You seem to be under the impression that I'm a nice person," I remind her. All I get in a response is a frustrated huff as she sorts through the tangles in her mane. God, this sight looks so fucking hilarious. A fucking purple unicorn is acting super butthurt about her mane looking like shit. This image would probably be a meme in less than a day on the internet back home. Sucks I don't have a camera though.

Moments later, Spike brings the finished tea to the table, along with two cups. Since Twilight is busy with her mane, I take the teapot and pour myself a copious amount of the gloriousness that is her tea. Then I set the teapot down. Twilight can pour her own fucking tea. I take a gulp of the tea, and then regret it. Dammit, when will I learn not to gulp down a scalding hot drink?

"So...I'm going to be blunt. Have you found anything on Sombra? Anything at all?" I begin, drinking my tea with more moderation, Twilight almost drops the comb, and then she looks at me sadly. That tells me all I need to know. "Are you fucking kidding me?"

"Look, Seth, I tried, I really did. I went through every book in my library, even the ones that weren't relevant, and I didn't even see a single mention of this King Sombra," Twilight attempts to placate me, but no matter she says, my mood is taking a nosedive.

"She's not lying, this place was a mess for most of the day," Spike chimes in helpfully. I slam the teacup down on the table with a clatter, frustrated.

"Are you sure he isn't from your time?" Twilight questions. I shake my head vigorously. There's not even a doubt in my mind about this.

"He can't be. Humans don't have magic. He looked like us, but he was definitely from the future. That much I am certain of," I argue. Twilight doesn't look convinced, which makes sense, because she didn't see the video in the school.

"Okay, if you say so. I'll keep trying then. If you're that certain he's from this time, I'm sure I'll find something," Twilight sighs resignedly. I cock an eyebrow at that.

"Didn't you just say you searched every book in this library? How the fuck are you going to do anything?" I point out. Twilight flinches at my coarse language.

"There is something I can do. I can ask Princess Celestia for access to the Starswirl the Bearded wing at the Canterlot Royal Library, but I'd have to head up to the city myself, and that might take a while," Twilight suggests. Okay, I know almost nothing about anything she just said, except that she's planning on asking the fucking royalty for help. Also that it's in a place called Canterlot. I wonder if they have a round table?

"Right. Because the royalty is honestly going to care about the request of one pony," I remark sarcastically. Twilight looks at me in confusion.

"Why wouldn't she? I am her personal student, after all. I send letters to her every week," she explains. I am still for a moment, and then I facepalm at my own forgetfulness.

"Right. Personal protege. I keep forgetting that you're somewhat important." Twilight looks affronted by that, but she doesn't say anything, instead choosing to wait for me to continue. "All right. Do it. I'm willing to do whatever it takes to find that bastard."

"What...what did King Sombra do to you to inspire this much hatred?" Twilight asks me tentatively, as if unsure how I'd react. I give her a deadpan look.

"Maybe I'll consider telling you when I have his head on a pike," I lie. I don't know what I'm going to do when I find Sombra. Perhaps I'll have him work his magic and send me back home. All I know is that I want him dead. Once I tear his internal organs from his body, I'll probably find some way to get myself killed. Killing Sombra is really my only reason for living right now.

Twilight pales at my graphic description, but she does a good job of keeping her voice stable when she addresses Spike. "Spike, could you take a letter for me?" she asks.

"Yeah! Gotta grab paper though. I'll be right back!" Spike answers, running out of the kitchen as fast as his little legs can carry him. Huh. Seems awfully enthusiastic to be a total slave to a purple unicorn. He's back a moment later with a box of stationery, which he plonks down on the table and opens to reveal rolls of parchment, inkwells, and quills. So...you ever feel like you're in trippy modded version of Skyrim? Because I certainly do.

Spike unrolls some parchment on the table, and then he dips the tip of a quill into the inkwell. He looks up at Twilight expectantly.

The unicorn clears her throat, and then begins to dictate. "Dear Princess Celestia. I would like to request access to the Starswirl the Bearded wing of the Canterlot Royal library for the weekend, as information that I do not currently possess has been requested of me. In my presence as I write this is a human, which you may recall is the species of sentient beings that precedes us by three thousand years. Seth Rogers is his name, and it is he that is requesting information concerning a certain "King Sombra." Granting my request would be great help in my quest to aid him, and would be greatly appreciated. Your faithful student, Twilight Sparkle."

Spike had stopped writing halfway through that, glancing at Twilight with a blank expression. When she notices him, Twilight raises an eyebrow. "Spike? Is something the matter?" she asks curiously.

"You used a lot of big words in there. I don't know how to spell most of them," Spike admits reluctantly, causing me to roll my eyes. What do you know, a dragon that doesn't know how to spell? What are the odds? In my world, fucking zero. In this world, apparently dragons are par for the goddamn course. Go figure.

Following Spike's confession, Twilight has him join us at the table. Then she starts helping him through the spelling of each word that he has trouble with, while I just sit here and twiddle my fucking thumbs. I'm lying. Twiddling thumbs is a dumb way to pass the time. No, I'm doing the smart thing, and drinking my tea. Man, I love this stuff.

"Okay, I think I've got it now. Thanks, Twilight!" Spike exclaims. After waiting a few moments for the ink to dry, the dragon rolls up the parchment and then carefully seals it shut with a weird golden seal. To my shock, he proceeds to incinerate the letter in a gout of green flame. "And sent!"

"What the fuck?! After all that work, you just burned it up?" I demand. Spike glances at me incredulously, as if he can't understand why I have a problem with what he just did.

"Spike, he doesn't understand our methods," Twilight lightly admonishes the dragon. She turns to me next. "Seth, Spike knows a basic spell that allows him to transport small objects directly to Princess Celestia through his magic-based flames."

"Of course. The answer to everything that doesn't make sense in this world. How are letters sent? Magic. Why do ponies get butt tattoos? Magic. How do pegasi move the clouds? Fucking magic!" I mutter, annoyed.

"Well, it's not quite that simple. If you are interested, I can tell you that the link works by magically entangling two mana particles in-" Twilight starts to explain.

"Yeah, how about no? I'm not quite ready for nap time, if you don't mind," I interrupt her rudely, which Spike finds quite amusing. Twilight huffs, annoyed that her explanation was cut off.

"Well, then you can't complain about magic if you don't want to hear how it works," Twilight shoots back at me petulantly, putting on an adorable pout.

"I most certainly can. No one says I have to follow proper logic," I disagree with a bored expression on my face. Twilight looks nonplussed at that.

"But...the logic determines the legitimacy of the complaint! Without logic, you don't have a basis to form a compelling argument!" Twilight has a point, but right now I'm having way too much fun just annoying her. "How can you complain knowing that you're wrong?"

"Because fuck you, that's how," I respond dryly, already done with this conversation. Meanwhile, on the floor, Spike is rolling around, finding this whole situation funny as hell. Twilight is speechless, completely unable to come up with a proper retort as a light blush forms on her face. Apparently these ponies are taking my profanities too seriously. "Now that that's done, how about I actually start asking questions now?"

"Y...yes, right. Ask away," Twilight stammers after she collects herself. Good. Now if I remember correctly, I wanted to ask her something about the school I went to.

"Why do some ponies not have butt tattoos?" I ask, remembering Apple Bloom, Sweetie Belle, and Scootaloo.

"I told you, they're called cutie marks," Twilight corrects me, earning a deadpan stare from me.

"I will never call them that, ever," I tell her flatly.

"Why not? It's the proper term!"

"Because it's a fucking stupid name for a tattoo, that's why," I reveal. Twilight gets even more frazzled at my stubbornness.

"Tattoos are completely different from cutie marks, in that the former utilizes needles to inject pigment directly into the skin, while the latter is an important cultural aspect of pony society!" Twilight is getting so frustrated it makes me chuckle.

"I know what they are. I'm just fucking with you," I tell her with a grin. Twilight's blush returns, and then I realize what it is I just said. She probably has no idea what that phrase means.

"N...no...we're having a conversation," Twilight stutters, while I facepalm.

"It's a human phrase...it means I'm joking. You really need to get out more if you take what I say so literally," I explain with a groan. Twilight nods shyly in understanding. "Now then, answer the question."

"Okay. Getting a cutie mark is a coming of age for any young foal, because it signifies that he or she has discovered what they are best at. If a foal doesn't have a cutie mark, it simply means that they are still searching for that talent," Twilight explains, her blush fading as she starts to talk about a more normal subject. God, if someone had told me that a pony could blush a week ago, I'd have probably called him a moron.

"Easy enough to understand. Now, here's the doozy. Why the fuck can pegasi control the weather? I literally saw a group of them push that giant ass thunderhead into town yesterday," I continue. This one I really want to know.

"I'm no pegasus, but my studies tell me that they use the magic intrinsic to them to produce and control weather patterns, and that's how our crops get the sunlight and rain that they need," Twilight discloses. So...magic. I don't know what I expected.

"But why do they need to do that? Three thousand years ago, weather patterns moved on their own, whether we liked it or not," I press. Twilight's eyes light up with interest. Shit...I just told her something about my world, didn't I? Fuck.

"Really? That's fascinating! What kinds of weather patterns were the most common? How much rainfall did you get per year? How did you keep the lightning discharge from harming your species? Why-"

"Shut up, Twilight. I asked a question first," I cut across her petulantly. Twilight flinches, looking like I'd slapped her in the face.

"I'm not quite sure, to be honest. It's been this way even before I was born. I think it might have something to do with the reign of Discord, over a thousand years ago," Twilight hypothesizes, resting her cheek on a hoof.

"Uh...Discord?" I repeat in a questioning manner. For some reason, I have a flashback to Final Fantasy's Chaos, the god of Discord. Now wouldn't that be the plot twist of the century.

"That's right, you don't know our history. The princesses weren't always the ones reigning in Equestria. Over a thousand years ago, an entity named Discord ruled over the world, twisting and perverting the landscape to his whims, and changing the laws of physics to suit himself," Twilight divulges. I blink, regarding her skeptically.

Twilight is astonished when I burst out laughing. Come on, really? A being that can literally move mountains and fuck up nature because he feels like it? That seems like something out of a Xanth book. "Okay, I guess I deserved that one. I'll get you back, though," I chortle, bewildering Twilight even further.

"What are you talking about?" Twilight demands. I give her an incredulous look.

"You're fucking with me, right? I mean, changing physics. Really?" I ask her suspiciously. I don't like that she looks so serious.

"No...I'm not...joking," Twilight says slowly. I am a bit amused that she didn't use my particular phrasing, but then again I feel like it would be weird seeing these ponies curse like I do. "Discord was a very real threat. After the princesses sealed him away in stone, they worked to reverse the damage to the world, but I guess some aspects of the natural order were permanently disrupted...I'll have do some research, but that's my primary theory."

"I...what? That's...I don't get it. How did everything go from making sense to being bat shit crazy?" I demand, resting my head in my hands. Not even a week ago, my preconceptions of reality were completely destroyed by the existence of magic. Now there are deities that can control reality itself? I mean, that kind of shit was what the church would preach back in my era, about some almighty god or whatever, but I never believed them either. "Twilight, I need proof. I can't just accept this."

"I understand. This is probably a lot to take in. If Princess Celestia approves my request, I'll take you with me to Canterlot and show you Discord himself," Twilight responds. My head shoots up with shock and I gaze at her with a panicked look. That fucker is still around? As if she notices my distress, Twilight adds, "Don't worry, he's sealed in stone."

"How comforting. So because this fucked up god ran around making the world FUBAR, pegasi have to work the weather themselves?" I summarize in an attempt to understand everything a bit better.

"FUBAR?" Twilight repeats, not understanding. Ugh...goddamn these ponies not knowing human mannerisms.

"Fucked up beyond all recognition," I clarify, slumping in my seat a little. Oh, that reminds me. I have more tea to drink. I sip some more from the cup while Twilight replies.

"Oh. Well, that's my theory. Whether or not it's true is another matter. Hm, I might actually write a thesis on this. It's been such a long time since I've had a research project to work on, it'll be-" Twilight starts getting really excited about shit I don't care about.

"Yeah, that's great I don't care," I cut her off, raining on her parade yet again. Twilight pouts for the umpteenth time. God, I've met someone who likes to work. This world is still FUBAR. "Now, there's something else that's been-"

Suddenly, Spike lets out a loud belch, and a wave of heat passes over me. I turn to see a stream of emerald flames jetting from his mouth, which then...how do I even describe this..._coalesce_ into a roll of parchment, held shut by a very fancy looking seal in the shape of a blazing sun. "Mail's here," Spike deadpans, tossing the scroll to Twilight, who grabs it eagerly with her magic.

"That was quick. I expected a least a day's wait, even if you are her personal student," I comment, watching Twilight open the scroll. She doesn't answer me, instead clearing her throat and reading the contents of the letter aloud.

"Dear Twilight Sparkle. Your mention of a human presence in Ponyville is a matter of some concern. Our records on their culture are scarce at best, and as such it is our recommendation that you treat this human with the utmost caution," Twilight begins, her voice wavering as she reads.

"I like her already," I remark. Seems like the royalty realizes that I have the potential to be dangerous, even if the other ponies don't think so.

"It is your mention of King Sombra, however, that is most alarming. As his existence is a well guarded secret, it came as a shock to both Luna and I that the human knows of him. As a result, there is no need for you to visit the Canterlot Royal Archives, as Luna and I will be arriving in Ponyville on the morrow to personally address this issue. You can expect us at dawn tomorrow. I apologize for the short notice, but this is a matter of national security. Your loving mentor, Celestia," Twilight finishes, a dumbfounded expression on her face. She drops the scroll, losing the ability to focus on her magic. "Princess Celestia and Princess Luna are coming here_tomorrow?!_"

"Oh no..." Spike sighs as Twilight's face becomes frantic.

_"I must clean EVERYTHING!"_ Twilight shrieks in panic, and then she starts dashing around the room in a frenzy, using her magic to replace books, dust off shelves, and other assorted tasks that don't really seem like they're all that important. I glance at Spike.

"Does she do this often?" I whisper to him. Spike gives me a look.

"Too often," is his telling response. Well, that's my cue to get the hell out of dodge. It looks like it's getting dark outside anyway. If I'm waking up at dawn to meet royalty, I need to get some sleep.

"I'll leave her to it then. I'm ducking out," I tell Spike, who nods at me as I move towards the door. I've been around ponies all day, so I can't wait to get back to Vinyl's and spend some time alone, even if all that means is lying on the bed and staring at the ceiling.

"SETH!" Twilight's scream causes me to pause in the middle of reaching for the door. "The princesses will be here at dawn. Don't be late!"

"Whatever," I reply, and then I leave the library and its crazed inhabitant behind.

Okay, now that I have nothing else to do today I should probably...my own thoughts are interrupted by the uncomfortable pangs of hunger shooting through my stomach. That answers that question. I need to eat first before going back. But where can I go?

I can probably go back to Carrot Top again, but she's probably closed by now. I have no fucking clue where to find any restaurants either. I don't want to go back to Vinyl's and beg food off of her, because she'll bitch and moan about it when I try to pay her for it. There's no way she can talk me into not paying her like Rarity did. She's a musician, so she can't feed me some bullshit about a "culinary challenge."

Or I could...wait. Shit. I'm meeting royalty in the morning. Like, way early in the morning. I don't have the clothes to meet them with. I don't usually give a fuck about fashion, but even I know it's an abysmally bad idea to meet royalty dressed clothes that are torn, grimy, and spattered with paint. I hope Rarity has something ready, because I'm waking up before dawn and waking her ass up. Hopefully she'll have something for me.

Now, back to food. Ah, fuck it, I'm too lazy to ask around for restaurants. It'll be a pain in the ass, but I'll just pay Vinyl to make me something.

My sense of direction has always been somewhat decent, so it's only a matter of time before I finish cross-referencing landmarks in my mind and end up back on the path to Vinyl's place.

Before I can get all the way there, I run into a lone pony in the streets. No, it's not Lyra, thank god. It's no her friend Bon Bon either. No, to my surprise, there's a familiar wall-eyed pegasus mare not far from me, attempting to pull a large package down the street with her.

Huh, it's Derpy. That one mare Rainbow Dash threatened to beat my face in over. I should probably just ignore her. I move to do just that, but then I hear a squeak of pain as Derpy accidentally backs into a mailbox. As she tries to move away, her tail gets caught in the flag of the mailbox, and she wails piteously when she realizes she's stuck.

Idiots will be idiots, I guess. I'll just le...fucking...dammit! I turn around and stride towards the beleaguered mare. You're so damn lucky I have a conscience, as numb as it usually is. The moment Derpy sees me coming, she gives me a pleading look. "Mr. Rogers! Can you help? I'm...stuck."

That...that fucking face. Damn you ponies and your innate cuteness. Especially this one. I don't...whatever, I've committed to this now. I might as well see it through. "Yeah. Be still," I answer, trying to use a few words as possible. I'm helping her, but I don't want her to get attached. Best to be as cold as possible, while not being outright mean. I'm no bully.

Derpy obediently stops struggling as I grab her tail and gently disentangle it from the flag, stopping every time I encounter a knot that would hurt her if I tug on. Finally, I manage to get it free, and Derpy leaps away from the mailbox, a bright smile splayed across her face. "Thank you so much, Mr. Rogers!" she gushes, and then to my utter shock, she rears up on her hind legs and places her front hooves on my chest, all for the purpose of giving me an affectionate lick on my cheek.

She gets down a second later, but I'm frozen. How the fuck does somebody react to being thanked like_that_? Rainbow was right, this really is a strange pony. Shaking my head to clear my mind, I decide to change the subject. "Don't mention it. What's in the package, anyway?"

Derpy's face brightens at the question. "My daughter, Dinky, has her birthday the day after tomorrow, so I wanted to get her gift home early. I didn't think it would be so heavy, though," she explains, glaring cutely at the package.

"Okay. Guess I'll leave you to it then," I say, and then I continue on my way. Or, at least I would have, if I hadn't started thinking after I got a few meters away. Rainbow said Derpy was really clumsy, right? There's not that many ponies out, so its entirely likely that she would have been stuck at that mailbox a lot longer If I hadn't been here. So if she gets into trouble again, the same thing might happen.

Not that I care. She's just some pony I barely know...that happens to be impaired. That has treated me with nothing but respect since I met her. And has a voice so adorable it could give a guy diabetes. So why should I go out of my way to help her...fucking...what a damn hassle.

"On second thought," I say, turning back around to see that Derpy had gone back to pulling weakly at the package with her teeth. She looks up hopefully at my voice, and then smiles when she sees me walking back to her. "Get out of the way."

Derpy whinnies a bit as I gently move her away from the package. Looking at it, I reach down and test its weight. Huh, it's not that heavy. I should be able to lift it. I bend my knees and wrap my arms around it, finding a proper grip. Derpy gasps when I unbend my body, lifting the entire package off of the ground. "Wow, Mr. Rogers! You're really strong! But...you don't have to do this for me."

"You're right. I don't. As to why I'm doing it, your guess is as good as mine," I tell her dryly, which only seems to confuse her. "Now, show me where your home is. "

"Okay! You're really nice, Mr. Rogers!" Derpy exclaims, her expression now much brighter than before. Yeah...don't get used to this. I don't even know what it is about you that makes me do all of this shit. Actually, yes I do. It's pity. I feel sorry for you.

"I prefer to be called Seth," I grunt. Together, the two of us move through the streets. To my surprise, we're still heading in the direction of Vinyl's house. Does that mean she lives near...holy shit it does. Derpy lives right across the damn street from Vinyl. I guess that makes us neighbors.

"This is my house." Derpy tells me, opening the door with her mouth. Without answering, I push past her and set the package down in her living room. "Thanks again for the help!"

"Whatever. I'm leaving now," I tell her uncomfortably. I really wish she wouldn't look at me so happily. I did it because I wanted to, not because I wanted to help you.

"Okay. Come by sometime! I owe you a muffin," Derpy offers. I wave my hand, and then I shut the door behind me.

Without bothering to knock, I walk into Vinyl's house and shut the door behind me. There's a shower upstairs that is calling my name. I think I'll head there first.

A snore distracts me just before I walk up the stairs. I peer curiously over the edge of the living room couch to see Vinyl resting on her back, her hooves splayed out in a random fashion. Her mouth is wide open, and her breathing is steady, telling me that she's asleep. That's one of the most undignified sleeping positions I've ever seen. To be fair though, I've never really seen any other positions, because I don't make a habit of watching ponies while they sleep.

I should leave her be. For now at least. When I get back down after my shower, I'll flip over the couch if she isn't awake by then.

Man, I can't even say how much more I appreciate showers now, as opposed to back in college. I remember I would always procrastinate my showers because I had so many other things to take care of. On the weekends, I wouldn't even shower at all unless I was meeting Amaryllis or going back to my mother's house.

Now, as I stand under the hot water, I feel like I've died and gone to heaven. Yeah...I think I mentioned this before. But what I am doing this time around is taking my grimy clothes into the shower with me, soaking them and scrubbing the dirt and sweat away with my bare hands. Using Vinyl's brush to do so would be kind of a dick move. But this way, if Rarity doesn't have anything ready for me in time, I can wear these again. I don't think the paint stains are going to come out, but it'll be less filthy than before.

Once I'm done cleaning the clothes and myself, I shut off the water and dry myself off. The damp clothes I leave hanging over the edge, except for my boxers. Those I wring out well and put on, as there's no way I'm going downstairs to eat naked. Even boxers is pushing it...hell, I'll wear this towel too.

I stomp down the stairs, and the first thing I notice that Vinyl is not on the couch anymore. Instead, I see a light on in the kitchen, and I think I hear Vinyl humming to herself. Hey, she's not that bad. I wonder if she sings at any of her gigs.

Moving into the kitchen, I see Vinyl throwing together a strange looking salad that is a mish mash of fruits and vegetables. There's also a loaf of sliced bread next to her, as well as a pile of what looked like hay.

The moment I join her in the kitchen, she turns and sees me, regarding me with those magenta eyes of hers. "S'up, dude. Welcome back," Vinyl greets me in that same chill manner that she always does. When she notices that I'm wearing almost nothing, she nods approvingly. "I see you decided to take my suggestion...though why are you wearing my towel?"

"Because I have some dignity left. This towel is my clothing until my other clothes dry," I explain tersely. Vinyl rolls her eyes.

"I'm telling you, just go without. Clothes are a pain in the tail, anyway," she advises me, but I shake my head vehemently.

"The answer is no. You ponies may think it's acceptable to go waltzing around totally naked, but I certainly don't," I snap. "Anyhow, here."

Vinyl blinks as I toss a bit at her. She catches it with her magic, and then looks at me quizzically. "What's this for?"

"I'm hungry. I want a bit of that salad," I tell her bluntly. Vinyl blinks.

"Dude...you know I've give you some for free," she admonishes me. She sighs when I give her a pointed stare that clearly tells her what I think of that. "But, I know how you are. Awright, take a seat and I'll serve you up."

Part of me wants to trust this pony, considering how chill she is about this. If it were Twilight, you can be damn sure she'd be shoving food down my throat. But...there's no way I can. I thought the same about the last person I trusted like that. I'm not talking about Amaryllis.

"How was work?" Vinyl asks conversationally as she spoons some of the salad into a bowl for me.

"I can't really complain. I was left to do my own thing, mostly," I reply, my mouth watering as I watch the bowl hover in front of me. There are spinach leaves in there, which is good, because I haven't had any meat since getting here, and that means I need the iron it has. I see some pineapple, apple slices, and strawberries in there as well as cucumber and carrots. This is going to be heaven.

"Sounds pretty rad. What's your evening look like tomorrow? Got time for a gig?" Vinyl inquires as I gorge myself on the salad. How am I eating it without silverware? With my hands of course. I'm clean, thanks to that shower.

"It it means more money, then I've always got time," I answer matter-of-factly. Vinyl raises an eyebrow, but doesn't comment on it.

"It won't be a Pinkie party, so it won't pay as much. It's in that club we met at," she informs me. Huh. Well, at least I am getting paid. That club was pretty chill, anyway.

"That's fine," I say tersely, returning to my food. The conversation dies after that, because I really didn't give Vinyl much to work with. She joins me at the table with her own bowl, which she just sticks her whole face into, clearly not one for eating in a dignified manner. Then again, neither am I, seeing as I'm eating with my damn hands.

"Can you wake me up a bit before dawn?" I ask suddenly after swallowing a particularly delectable strawberry. Vinyl looks at me in confusion.

"Heck, dude, what for? That's really early," she questions with an appalled expression. I give her a wry look. I guess she's not a morning person. Makes sense, given the whole nightclub thing.

"Probably has something to do with the fact that I'm getting a visit from the princesses in the morning," I say offhandedly, shrugging. Vinyl nods.

"Sounds pretty cool. I'll make sure to do that then," she answers, and then she lifts a cup of water to her lips to drink. Two seconds later she spews an entire mouthful of water all over the table. "WHAT?!"

"Did I stutter?" I retort, enjoying the flabbergasted look on my landlady's face a little more than I should.

"Princess Celestia is coming here? _To my house?!_" Vinyl shrieks, standing up and placing her front hooves on the table. She looks around frantically at the mess that is her place.

"Nah, she's going to Twilight's. And I think she's bringing another, called Luna," I clarify. Vinyl sits down, releasing a relieved sigh.

"Gah, don't scare me like that, dude. It would be totally uncool for the princesses to see my crib looking so messed," she says, and then pops a strawberry into her mouth. "Still, it's pretty sweet that you get to meet them."

"Good that one of us does. I think it's a pain in the ass. Because I really care to be fawned over by two stuck up royal types," I remark. Vinyl looks troubled at that.

"You really shouldn't talk about them like that. They've done nothing but do right by us," she reprimands me. I shake my head, unconvinced.

"Uh-huh. I'll believe it when I see it. As far as I know, all those upper class freaks hide their corrupt and power hungry nature behind a mask of benevolence," I deadpan. My words earn a pained expression from Vinyl. "If they want my respect, they'll have to earn it."

"Dude, you're so negative," Vinyl comments, and then takes another drink of water, this time not spitting it everywhere.

"Cry me a river," I scoff, not caring in the least what she thinks about me. Ignoring her hurt expression, I finish off the rest of my salad and drain my glass of water. "I'm going to bed now."

"Okay. Good night, Seth," Vinyl calls after me as I rise from the table. I make sure to keep the towel from falling away from my waist. Leaving the six bits for my rent on the table, I stride out of the kitchen and through the living room. From there, it's not long before I'm back in my comfortable room.

Sitting down heavily on the bed, I let out a contented sigh. Alone at last. Now I can lose myself in my own sorrow again.

This world really sucks. It's not a good feeling to know that you're the only one left of your kind in a world that thinks of you as a wondrous being, caring little for you as a person. But then again, that's how people are, and ponies aren't that much different. If this world is anything like mine, then the moment the ponies find out I exist, there will be hordes of reporters. I hope to god that doesn't happen. I'll kill every damn one of them if they make my now shitty life any worse.

So...for the rest of my life, I'll be completely alone. No friends, no family, and no chance of ever starting a family of my own. Not that that thought ever crossed my mind that often before, but I have to admit, once or twice I'd entertained the odd fantasy of settling down with Amaryllis. Too bad she's dead now.

Hopefully the princesses will be able to shed some light on this whole thing about Sombra. They seem to know who he is, and if all goes well, I'll be able to put an end to him with extreme prejudice.

With these thoughts in my head, I lay back on the bed and stare at the ceiling. It feels good to rest after an entire day of being on my feet. For a moment, I start to worry over what the princesses might do upon meeting me. If I were a brightly colored pony and I just happened to show up in my era, I'd have been captured and dissected in a lab somewhere. That hasn't happened here yet, obviously, but who knows what the future holds?

"Fucking...brain, stop your shit. I want to sleep," I growl at myself. "Just because I lay down on the bed isn't an excuse for you to go all philosophical on me. So fuck you, and good night."

Now I'm talking to myself. Thankfully, it seems to have worked. I can quell these troublesome thought rolling around in my mind at last, and sleep starts to overtake me.

Whatever happens tomorrow, happens, and worrying won't change that.

* * *

Writer's block hit me halfway through this chapter, but I beat it. It's probably because I'm setting up for the princesses to arrive. But I'm not putting down this story because it gets hard to write.

Also, character development for Seth! \o/


	11. The Royal Sisters

I don't think I even got six hours of sleep before I jerked awake, disturbed by some nightly dream I can't remember. I look at the clock on the wall. It's almost six in the morning.

Turning over doesn't help me any. It's impossible to get back to sleep if it happens in the middle of the night, or at least it is for me. Is this even considered the middle of the night? When I think about it, I think this is just the right time for me to be getting up. A bit early, sure, but now I have enough time to get ready.

I hoist myself up off the bed and get to my feet. A wave of dizziness hits me, causing me to screw my eyes shut and hold my head. "Shit, got up too fast," I mumble to myself.

Do I even have time to get to Rarity's? Or the better question is, should I even bother? It seems to me like Rarity will have a bedroom on the upper floors, and won't hear me if I knock on her door. Plus, I don't know the exact time the princesses will show up.

Fuck it, I'm not going. Why should I care if a few stuck up pony princesses disapprove of my clothing? I just do what I always do and blow off their questions, get the information I need, kill Sombra, and hope that I die in the process.

Grabbing my rifle, I open the door to my room and step outside, almost running into a very tired looking Vinyl, who is probably on her way to get me. Well, I managed to stop myself, but she doesn't stop, running muzzle first into my shirtless chest. Vinyl lets out a grunt, and then she looks up at me. A few seconds pass before her sleepy mind registers what she's looking at.

"Oh...you're awake already..." Vinyl murmurs, rubbing her eyes with her hoof.

"Clearly," I say sarcastically, pushing the sleepy pony back a few feet. It's then that I realize I'm only in my boxers. My clothes are still in the bathroom. Shit. "My internal alarm clock is a bitch. Go back to sleep."

"Don't have to tell me twice," Vinyl responds, seemingly not noticing how relatively naked I am at the moment. Unlike me. I'm mortified that I forgot to grab the towel out of my room. Thankfully these boxers are the longer and thicker kind, more like shorts rather than those flimsy pieces of shit that have the holes right over the crotch. So I don't have to worry about my dick hanging out. That would be awkward. Makes me wonder why they making boxers like that in the first place.

I watch Vinyl slowly plod back to her room, and then I proceed to the bathroom post haste, shutting the door behind me. My shitty clothes are still hanging from the shower pole, ripped and torn as always. Upon touching them, I feel that they're all rigid from drying. Well, wearing them is going to be super uncomfortable. Let's just hope this meeting with the princesses goes by quickly, so I can get some new clothes.

Several curses and chafe marks later, I'm dressed again and ready to go. No point in eating either, since it's not my food. I descend the stairs as quietly as possible, so as not to disturb my landlady. Well, technically I should call her a landpony or landmare, but those sound stupid.

I walk out into the street, shivering a bit at the low temperature. Now, I've been to Twilight house enough times to know where it is, so it only takes me a few minutes before I get there.

A few of the lights are on in the tree, so I'm assuming Twilight got up around the same time I did. Good, that means she'll let me in out of the cold. My clothes aren't doing shit in the state they're in now.

I knock on the door, only for the door to open almost a second later. Twilight is there, looking as though she had woken up even earlier than me to freshen herself up. Her mane practically gleams in the light from inside.

Twilight's face lights up with a smile when she sees me. "Oh! You're early. I knew I could count on you. Come on in. The princesses should be here any minute."

I walk past her wordlessly, still tired from having to wake up so early. I immediately sit down on the floor, my back against one of her bookshelves. Twilight giggles when she sees my condition. "I can get you some coffee if you'd like," she offers. I give her an odd look.

"You have both tea _and_ coffee?" I ask, raising an eyebrow. This only serves to confuse Twilight.

"Yes. Why? Do you consider that odd?" she replies, tilting her head. I groan and shake my head.

"That is so wrong," I mutter. Indeed, I know some people that would look down their noses at you for preferring one kind over the other. It seems really stupid now that I think about it. Yet another reason why the human race is fucking useless. "No thanks. I find that caffeine actually makes things worse in the long run."

"Okay. Also, I've been meaning to ask. Have you paid a visit to Rarity yet? She should be willing to make you some new outfits," Twilight changes the subject, while proceeding to pick up a few books on the center table and returning them to their correct spots on the shelves.

"I did yesterday. But she's still working on them, so I'm wearing these shitty clothes," I respond. Now Twilight looks genuinely surprised.

"You did? I'm pleasantly surprised. I'd have thought you'd have refused to let her make anything for you, knowing how you are. What changed your mind?" She questions. Okay, she's the second one to say that. "Knowing how you are." That makes me annoyed.

"Look, don't give me shit about it. I did it for my own reasons that I don't feel inclined to share with you," I snap at her. Twilight's ears fold back, flinching at my tone.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to offend you. I was just curious," she apologizes. Huh, that's interesting. Usually if I snap at someone, their first response is to act defensive, even if they're wrong. Here though, all the ponies seem to just get depressed. I don't understand at all.

"Secondly, you don't 'know how I am.' You've known me for what, three days? That's nowhere near enough time for you to know me," I continue, rising to my feet. Twilight takes a few steps back. "Thirdly, I don't intend for you to know me. So get that idea out of your head right now."

"Look, Seth, please. Calm down. I didn't mean anything by what I said. I was just making conversation," Twilight pleads with me, visibly intimidated by my angry expression. "You're right, I don't know you as well as I'd like, but you're not exactly making it easy for me, either."

"Good. Don't get attached to me. All your friendship will do is hold me back," I grunt. I notice the moment I said that last sentence that Twilight now looks as if I'd slapped her. But it's something that had to be said. I don't want anything holding me back when I go to fight Sombra.

"Seth...what made you like this? Why won't you let anypony get close?" Twilight asks softly, causing me to rub my forehead in exasperation.

"If I didn't tell you the first time you asked, why would I tell you now?" I point out bitterly. Twilight lowers her head.

"Because if you don't tell anypony, we can't help you get better," she answers me timidly. That just makes me angrier.

"'Get better?' You say that like I have a disease that needs curing. Fuck you," I growl, earning an irritated sigh from Twilight.

"That's not what I meant. You should know by now how lonely it gets when-" she begins, but then she cuts off suddenly, lifting her head and looking around. "The princesses are here!"

"Finally," I say, glad to be done with this conversation. Twilight is starting to get on my nerves now. Twilight spares me one last sad look, and then she opens the door of the library, gesturing for me to follow.

Wonderful, we're back out in the cold again. I take a quick look around, noticing nothing out of the ordinary. So where are these princesses? "Are...you sure they're here?" I question skeptically. Twilight nods emphatically.

"I felt them. Chances are, they'll be coming from the air," Twilight explains, pointing a hoof at the skyline opposite the front door of her house. I follow her hoof, and sure enough, something is approaching from over the town. I'm interested to see how the ponies in this era fly. Do they have airplanes? Or it is...fucking Santa Claus style. Are you kidding me?

I'm not joking. There are two chariots approaching, being carried by what seems to be armored pegasi. I can see more and more of their features as they approach.

The chariots are fucking massive, and have varying color schemes. The one that's closest to us is mostly golden, and the pegasi are armored in a similarly golden color scheme, though they have roman-esque helmets, with a blue plume and everything. The other chariot and pegasi I can barely see, because they're colored black and purple, blending into the night so well that I have to really strain my eyes to see them.

As for the ponies riding in the chariots, I can't see them very well at all until the chariots land with a crash, coming to a stop just in front of us. And the first thing I notice is that the ponies in the chariots are fucking gigantic. Like, more like horses, rather than ponies.

The one on the golden chariot is a large white pony with both a long sharp horn on her head, signifying her as a unicorn, and a large span of feathery white wings, making her also a...pegasi? What? Does that make her a...pegacorn? Unisus? Fuckin...whatever. That aside, her mane and tail are four different colors. They're the cool colors, like pale blue, magenta, pale green, and pale violet. And what's even trippier is that they're is waving in a non existent breeze. That's just freakin cool. Mane aside, she's wearing a golden neck brace thing...I don't know what to fucking call it...with a purple gem set in the center of it, and a golden crown with a similar gem on it.

The second one is much darker than the other, being a midnight blue with both a horn and wings as well. I guess that's a trait common to royalty. Her mane is also trippy, yet in my opinion being far more beautiful. It looks like a slice of pure night, waving in a nonexistent breeze like the other. There's even points of light present in her mane that look like stars. Lastly, she's also wearing a crown, only hers is black, and her neck brace has a crescent moon on it.

So I'm guessing the white one is Celestia, and the blue one is Luna. Both of them are looking directly at me. Celestia is giving me a very guarded expression, while Luna just looks downright suspicious.

"Princess Celestia!" Twilight cries out happily and runs towardsthe princess, as the regal white pony steps down from the chariot. Celestia greets her student with a warm smile, craning her head down to nuzzle Twilight affectionately. "It's good to see you. And you too, Princess Luna."

"Indeed. It has been far too long, my dearest student," Celestia returns the greeting with a kind voice, causing me to raise an eyebrow. Isn't she being a little too friendly for royalty? At least Luna over there is watching me like a hawk. You know, in case I wanted to kill them. Like a smart ruler should.

Then Celestia turns her gaze onto me, and for a reason I can't understand, I tense up as her magenta eyes stare into my own. There's...I don't know how to explain it, but it's like those eyes are piercing through my damn soul. I can't hold her gaze for more than a few moments before I avert my eyes. I think I understand what Twilight meant by "feeling them" as well. There's a slight pressure in the air that wasn't there before, probably caused by their presence. Just how powerful are these princesses?

"You must be Seth Rogers," Celestia conjectures, walking closer to me. She's taller than I am, if I take her horn into account. Wow, it's odd to be standing head to head with a pony this tall. Okay. I need to not be cowed by this fucker. Steeling myself, I return my gaze to her eyes.

"I don't know, do you see any other humans around?" I remark sarcastically. Twilight looks horrified at that.

"Seth! Don't be rude, she's a _princess_!" Twilight hisses at me. I ignore her though. As far as I'm concerned, her part in my story is over. She can go sit in a corner while I murder Sombra.

"It's quite all right, Twilight," Celestia soothes her. Twilight doesn't look satisfied, but she does back down. "Now then. I must say, it is quite the honor to meet one of our precursors. I am Princess Celestia."

"And we are Princess Luna," the other princess says, having descended from the chariot and joined us. She's not as tall as Celestia, but still tall enough that she can look into my eyes without craning her head. I raise an eyebrow. Did she just say, "We?" What's up with that?

"Well, you already know my name. I hope you didn't expect someone useful. I'm here because I'm unlucky," I return, shoving my hands into my pockets to warm them. "Now what exactly was so important that you felt you needed to come see me personally?"

"Before we get into that, why don't we go inside?" Celestia suggests sensibly, and I find myself nodding in agreement. It's freezing out here. "Twilight?"

"Of course, princess! My house is always open to you. Come on in, everyone!" Twilight obliges with an excited smile, leading the way into her house.

"Guards, remain on standby until we return," I hear Luna order the armored pegasi outside, just as I walk back into Twilight's house.

Celestia and Luna then join us inside the house, their eyes now solely on me. Twilight notices the atmosphere and gulps. "I'll uh...go make some tea," she stammers, removing herself to the kitchen. That leaves me alone with the two princesses.

"I'm sure you must have a lot of questions, Seth. Do you mind if I call you Seth?" Celestia finally begins, breaking the awkward silence.

"I actually prefer it," I reveal, idly running a hand through my hair, wincing when I come across several knots. "So...really? You're just going to let me start?"

"Of course. There must be some reason a human has appeared for the first time in three millennia. I assume you would be disoriented or confused," Celestia explains, rather accurately describing how I felt when I first arrived in this era.

"Huh. Very perceptive of you. That's...not at all what I expected," I admit.

"Oh? What didst thou expect?" Luna speaks up for the first time, and to my shock, I realize she's speaking in early modern English, just like Sombra did.

"If the government here was anything like it was back in my era, I half expected to be immediately seized and thrown into a lab somewhere for study," I tell them bluntly. The both of them look appalled at the notion.

"Absolutely not. Putting your species' history behind, you are a newcomer to Equestria. As its sovereigns, we would like to make you feel welcome here," Celestia affirms, giving me a warm smile.

"Though we art quite curious as to thy origins, when thy kind hath been considered extinct," Luna adds. And there's the catch. Oh, sure, you're welcome...as long as you tell us what we want to know.

"Make me feel welcome, huh? Why don't I believe that?" I ask sardonically, crossing my arms. Celestia raises an eyebrow at my cynicism, but Luna is much more vocal.

"ART THOU CALLING MY SISTER A LIAR?!" Luna's voice suddenly rises several decibels in volume, her eyes blazing white with what I assume to be magical power. I step back, cover my ears, and screw my eyes shut until the last echoes of her incredibly loud voice fade away.

"You know...if you really want me to tell you anything, is shouting at me really the smartest thing to do?" I point out, gingerly moving my hands off of my ears. If anything, Luna looks even more enraged. She opens her mouth again, but this time Celestia places a hoof on Luna's shoulder, and then gives her a stern look.

"Please forgive my sister, Seth. She does not entirely trust your species," Celestia explains with an apologetic expression.

"How can we, when all of thy literature we hath discovered shows a fixation with war and other atrocities?" Luna protests. In response, I give her a grin, which surprises her.

"Okay, I like you. You're smart," I say, pointing at Luna, who now looks utterly perplexed, as does Celestia. "You're right. Most of my kind is vicious, ruthless, and evil, and if you have access to some of our literature, you should know not to trust us."

"Thou admits it freely?" Luna says with a suspicious glance. I nod in response, before looking at Celestia.

"My question is why you are so willing to trust me. Come to think of it, everypony here has completely opened themselves up to me, even though I'm a complete unknown. Why is Luna here the only one who isn't naïve?" I demand, jabbing my finger at her. Celestia's ears twitch, but she manages to keep her expression neutral.

"You appear to be a very cynical individual, Seth," Celestia states, causing me to roll my eyes. Gee, what was your first clue. "Perhaps to one such as you, my view point may indeed seem naïve. But if there's one thing I've learned from my long years of life, it's that everyone deserves a chance, no matter who they are."

"Long years, huh? How old are you, anyway?" I question, her words resonating in my mind. She sounds a lot like my mother did, whenever she would lecture me about the ways I treated people.

"My sister and I have been in power since Discord's defeat, over a millennia ago," Celestia discloses, and then my jaw promptly falls to the floor. The princesses are over a thousand fucking years old?! How...what...are they immortal?

That means they've had a lot more experience with ponies than I have, and if ponies are similar to humans, then she would know what she's talking about...no, she's an idiot. She can't possibly expect me to believe that there's ponies worth trusting out there.

"I see your point," I admit reluctantly. She basically told me to shut up because I'm nothing but a child to them. "Now then...I can accept that you are willing to trust me. But I have to be honest: I'm not going to trust you so soon after meeting you."

"I appreciate your honesty. All I ask is the opportunity to earn your trust," Celestia acknowledges with a dip of her head.

I don't know how to feel about this. She's a pony, yes, and since they're like humans, she'll have some ulterior motive behind her being this nice. But on the other hand, it feels like she's being sincere. Instead of acting defensive or depressed when I act cynical like I always do, she essentially told me that she's fine with it, and hopes that I'll eventually trust her. That...is the most unique approach I've ever seen anyone take when talking to me.

"The tea is ready!" Twilight calls, and then she emerges from the kitchen. Floating in the air in front of her is a platter with a teapot and cups atop it. Luna and Celestia's horns light up a dark blue and a soft yellow, respectively, and then two cups levitate from the platter and fly over towards them.

"Thank you, Twilight. Now that you are here, I believe we can cut to the heart of the matter," Celestia says, her tone becoming dead serious. I watch the princess curiously, taking the cup that Twilight offers me. "Seth, would you mind telling us how you know about King Sombra?"

I grip the teacup harder, a dark look crossing my face. This is it. I will finally learn about the bastard that killed my family and friend. "Before that, I'd like to know who he is," I answer rudely. When Luna opens her mouth, probably to protest, I cut across her. "Look, you ponies have been trying to get information out of me ever since I got here. I said I wasn't telling anypony anything until I learned more about Sombra, and I meant it."

"I'd like to know who he is, too, princess," Twilight joins timidly, gazing at her mentor. "I'm interested in why he's not in any of my books or records."

"I suppose that's fair," Celestia relents, while her sister looks less than pleased. Celestia produces a small pink crystal from her mane, and then places it on the ground. "I'd best start from the beginning. Over a thousand years ago, in the far north, there was a separate kingdom known as the Crystal Empire."

Celestia's horn lights up, and suddenly a beam of light strikes the crystal. To my shock, a three dimensional hologram fades into existence. It depicts a massive city arranged in an angular pattern around one massive crystal structure that looks like a cross between the damn Eiffel Tower and the Crystal Tower from Final Fantasy III. Wow, that's just fucking awesome. I look in awe at the city before me. So this is the Crystal Empire. It's beautiful.

Twilight's eyes light up immediately, and she levitates a stack of parchment and several assorted writing materials over to her. She immediately starts taking notes, causing me to roll my eyes.

"The magic of the Crystal Empire was so great, it affected the land around it, causing crystals to grow naturally from the ground and giving the pony inhabitants a crystalline appearance," Celestia continues. I adopt a deadpan expression at her words. Really? Crystals growing from the damn ground? There is something seriously wrong with this world, I swear. "Not only that, but the magic of the Crystal Heart, the embodiment of the hope and love of the citizens, was strong enough to blanket all of Equestria in these traits."

As I watch, the hologram zooms in to the bottom of the tower, making me feel like I'm actually there. In the middle of the clearing beneath the tower, there's a glowing heart carved from crystal slowly spinning in a crystal apparatus. Geez, everything in this place is made of fucking crystal.

"The Crystal Empire enjoyed a peaceful prosperity, trading crystals with neighboring countries in turn for the resources they did not have. This all came to an end, however, when Sombra first appeared."

The hologram pans away from the Crystal Heart, flying across the entire city in the space of a few seconds until at last it rests upon a crystalline clifftop on the outskirts of town. There is a dark figure standing there, and as the hologram draws closer, I recognize him immediately.

"That's him," I gasp. There's no way I forget him. Sombra stands atop the cliff, garbed in that same iron breastplate and red cloak, along with that crown that held back his wild black hair. There was only one difference between this Sombra, and the one I'd seen. He is a pony here. A unicorn as well, if that vicious looking reddish horn is anything to go by. He looks the very essence of evil, a wolfish grin stretched across his face. "Holy shit!"

Behind Sombra is a giant fucking army of what looks like...undead? I'm not wrong. Even Twilight is gasping at the terrifying sight. There's a lot of skeletal ponies out there, along with a few relatively fresh looking ponies that are probably the necromancers.

"Sombra's lust for power, as well as his grudge against the royal family of the Crystal Empire, caused him to invade the empire with all of his might. He was too strong for anypony to stop him, so it wasn't long before Sombra had seized control, proclaiming himself King," Celestia details, changing the hologram yet again, only this time there's a huge difference.

The city is now fucking black. Like, the crystals beforehand were all light blue and pink, but now they're black and gray. The tower looks like something out of Lord of the Rings, only minus the giant ass eye at the top.

"So Sombra is still in control of this place?" I ask eagerly, already envisioning what I'd do to him. Celestia shakes her head solemnly.

"He is not. But before I explain that, I would like for you to detail your experience with him," Celestia expresses, allowing the hologram to dissipate. I shrug, watching the city fade away into thin air. Fair enough. I've learned a lot about Sombra, so it's time I kept my word.

"All right. I met him back in my era, three thousand years ago, only he looked human for some reason," I relate. This short sentence is enough to surprise them.

"What? Sombra made it back to thy own era? Sister, how is this possible?" Luna inquires.

"I'm not sure, but it would explain why he was missing that one week before you and I made our counterattack," Celestia replies.

"I actually have a theory," Twilight spoke up, getting our attention. She quails slightly when we all look at her at once. Celestia gives her a warm smile, encouraging her to continue. "Well, from the information given, I can only assume that King Sombra must have seized control of Starswirl the Bearded's time travel and self-transformation spells. He then perfected them, allowing him to travel much further back in time than previously thought, and for a longer period of time, while transforming his body to fit in."

I gape at Twilight. That actually makes a lot of sense."But that still doesn't explain how I got here," I point out.

"I was hoping you could tell us more," Twilight says hopefully. Celestia, who had been thinking since Twilight's theory, returns to the conversation.

"That is a matter of some concern, as those spells were locked tightly within the Starswirl the Bearded Wing of the Canterlot Royal Library," Celestia recalls, looking towards Luna.

"Indeed. We do not believe Sombra could have infiltrated the castle so easily," the night princess concurs. Now, I'm not the smartest of individuals when it comes to real life situations, but I can put two and two together. Somehow, Sombra got his hands, claws, hooves, whatever on that spell.

"That means one of two things," I start. The other three look at me expectantly. "Either your security sucked a lot more than you want to admit, or you had a traitor."

Both of the princesses glanced at one another, looking visibly disturbed at that notion, though I can't understand why. You're in charge of a country. It's obvious that someone's not going to like you.

"That is a matter for another time. For now, there is something that doesn't fit with Twilight's theory," Celestia finally says after that awkward silence. I notice that Twilight is actually nodding, as if she had expected her to say that.

"Even if he did acquire Starswirl's spells, they're far from being efficient enough to facilitate time travel to a time longer than a week, much less three millennia," Celestia explains. That reminds me of what Twilight had said during one of our previous conversations. "In addition, the self-transformation spell is heavily flawed, in that it is permanent, and if performed incorrectly, can kill the caster."

"Therefore it stands to reason that Sombra found some way to improve or perfect these spells, if we assume that the spells were stolen in the first place," Luna completes. You see, this I can get into. These rulers are clearly very intelligent and willing to work with me make sense of this whole situation. If I know more about Sombra, the higher my chances of killing him are.

"Possibly. I don't recall Sombra being the scholarly type, so I think it unlikely that he created these spells from scratch. By that same logic, however, it's also a stretch to think that he could have improved upon Starswirl's spells without help," Celestia asserts. Twilight is scribbling notes at an incredible pace to keep up with everything that's being said.

"Whether he had help or not, the fact remains that he did make himself a human and come to my era. He was in my school, for god's sake," I say, changing the subject. While interesting, finding out how he came to my era doesn't change the fact that he did.

"Truly? What purpose didst he approach thy school?" Luna asks, quirking an eyebrow. Both Celestia and Twilight are looking at me with interest. Dammit, guess I'd better tell the full story.

"Your guess is as good as mine. All I know is what he said to me, and what he did to my race," I say, shrugging. "Let me give you the shortened version. I ran into Sombra in the stairwell of my school on a normal day. Literally, I ran into him. He was preparing some spell or another that he accidentally cast on me when I ran into him, and he was angry about it for a few moments before he decided I fit his criteria or whatever. Then he left, I passed out, and now I'm here. But while I was unconscious..."

"Tell me, do you know what happened to the human race?" I ask in a deceivingly calm voice.

"Unfortunately, we do not. Despite our age, there was not much in the way of records left behind. There are many theories as to why the humans disappeared," Celestia replies, appearing uncertain as to where I'm going with this.

"My favorite is that the humans suffered from overpopulation, a theory which is supported by the presence of advanced technological constructs designed to promote health, such as the heart rate monitor that we use now," Twilight spoke up, seemingly oddly excited. She wasn't completely wrong; no doubt humanity would have had to face the desolation of our planet's resources had we lived a few decades more. "As a result, humanity resorted to underground bunkers-some of which we've discovered-and the historian Noire Page even theorized that some humans may have traveled into space!"

I did my best not to laugh at that. Yeah, there wouldn't have been any humans going to space. Our space exploration program had their funding pulled a while before the whole Sombra incident. As for underground bunkers...that makes a little sense. No doubt pockets of human resistance turtled up within these bunkers in an attempt to hold off the Oppressed. Too bad it didn't work.

"Ludicrous. The night skies are under my command, and there are no humans living among the stars," Luna says with a scoff. I raise an eyebrow at that. The night skies are under your command? The fuck does that mean?

"Luna's right. There was no space travel," I affirm. I don't miss the slight look of disappointment cross Twilight's face. "The overpopulation theory is also wrong."

"Can you tell us what did happen?" Celestia asks softly. From the way she's looking at me, I think she knows what I'm about to say.

"They all died. Sombra murdered every single damn one of them, down to the last man, woman, and child," I growl. Twilight gasps in horror, while Luna raises a hoof to her mouth in shock. Celestia looks down with a sad expression. Turns out she had her suspicions after all. Now idea how though. She's also super old, so I'm guessing reading people comes with age.

"That's...that's horrible!" Twilight exclaims. A few moments later, she looks at me with grim understanding in her eyes. "...Is that why you won't let anypony get close?"

"Yeah, go ahead and make assumptions Twilight. It's none of your damn business what I do with my social life," I growl at her, annoyed that she brought that up. Tell someone one small unrelated detail, and suddenly they think they have you all figured out. Fucking pisses me off. When Twilight opens her mouth to protest, I cut her off. "Hello, there's princesses in the room? This is no place for that kind of talk anyway."

"We...I am sorry thou hadst suffered such tragedy, Seth," Luna chokes out. I give her a disbelieving look. Like I care what you feel about it. You weren't there. You can't know. I wasn't there either, and that's what makes it worse.

"Doesn't this mean that Sombra is in part responsible for our very evolution?" Twilight speaks up timidly. The Luna looks thoughtful at that suggestion, but Celestia is still gazing at me with veiled worry.

"No. The human race would have died out anyway. It was just a matter of time," I correct her bitterly. "You weren't wrong about overpopulation. It was a problem, one that would have severely affected us even if Sombra hadn't arrived."

"Oh..." Twilight trails off, looking crushed. Finally, I get annoyed at being stared at, so I return Celestia's gaze, glaring at her.

"I assume you want revenge?" Celestia asks me softly. Once again, she shocks me with her perceptiveness. I'm starting to see why she's part of the ruling duo. Besides being immortal, of course.

"You're damn right I do," I answer, a twisted grin crossing my face. This earns a sad sigh from Celestia, while Luna and Twilight give me concerned looks.

"Would you mind if Seth and I spoke privately?" Celestia requests suddenly, addressing Twilight and Luna. I give the princess an askance look. What could she possibly have to say that can't be said in front of her sister and student?

Turns out I'm not the only one who thinks this is a bit odd. "Sister?" Luna asks curiously. This prompts Celestia to give her sister a long, calm look. "Okay. We trust thee."

"Of course, princess. If you'd like, you can use my room upstairs," Twilight offers, deciding not to question it as well. How nice it must be to blindly trust someone like that. I see Celestia gesturing towards the staircase.

"Oookaayy..." I mutter, a bit concerned. Whatever. I'm sure it's important, whatever it is. Pony or not, she is royalty.

I tramp up the stairs after ear, feeling the eyes of Luna and Twilight following us until we pass out of view. I've never been in this portion of the house, and...now that I think about it, I've never actually been in a girl's room. Not that I'd see Twilight as a girl...it's that she's female...and...fuck it, why am I bothering to explain it? This is my own journal, after all. If someone else is reading this, then fuck you with a house.

Walking into Twilight's room, the first thing I notice is...more bookshelves. I don't know what I expected. This in an interesting set up for a room, though. Twilight's bed is on an extended ledge situated just above us as we enter, beneath a window, with a smaller staircase circling around the right side of the room.

Celestia keeps walking until she reaches the other side of the room, and then she turns around, her mane gently reflecting the early sunlight. She regards me with what I'm sure was supposed to be a motherly expression for a few moments, until I get impatient.

"Okay, so what do you want, and why can't Luna or Twilight hear it?" I demand, crossing my arms across my ripped and stained shirt.

"It's mostly for your sake, rather than theirs," Celestia reveals, albeit cryptically. "Now, I want you to listen very carefully to what I have to say."

Suddenly I have a very bad feeling about this. "Get on with it."

"I would like you to abandon your plans of revenge," she begins, and immediately I get angry. "All it will do is bring you pain."

"Who the fuck do you think you are?!" I shout instantly, preventing her from speaking further. "I don't care that you're some pony princess or whatever. I'm not a pony, and therefore not your subject!"

"You are right, of course. I cannot order you to listen to me. This is simply a request from one who knows how it feels to be wronged as you have," Celestia clarifies, not even flinching at my angry outburst.

"Don't you even. Don't you dare say you know how it feels! Have you lost your entire race?!" I shoot back, jabbing a finger at her. Celestia gives me a sad, knowing smile.

"Forgive me if I'm wrong, but I don't think this is about your race," she corrects me softly. I freeze. But...my race...she...how the fuck did she know? I think my shocked expression is enough for Celestia to know she's right.

"You..." I stammer out, but I can't seem to form an intelligable sentence.

"I don't know who in particular you lost, Seth, but taking it out on Sombra will not bring them back. In the end, the only one hurt will be you." Celestia moves closer to me.

My knees feel weak. Celestia's words are cutting right through me like a knife. I don't know how she knows all this. Everything she says is spot on, and that's only making me feel worse.

Celestia is quiet, allowing me to sort through the jumbled mess of thoughts that are running through my head. I mean, it's not like I haven't heard a speech like this before. There's animes out there that have this very same lesson in it. It's just that I've never had it spoken specifically to me before, and had it actually apply.

Celestia is right. Even if I kill Sombra, Amaryllis, Maka, Adam, and my parents will still be dead. No, instead I'd have to deal with the fact that I'd killed someone in cold blood.

You know what? I'm prepared to deal with that.

"You're right, Celestia. They aren't coming back. But this is something I have to do," I declare in a firm voice. "I won't let someone like that go on living. If I don't do it, then who will?"

Celestia stares at me sadly, heaving a sigh. "It would have been easier to get you to give up on your own," she laments mysteriously. I shoot her a glance.

"What are you talking about?" I say with a hint of dread. On your own? Does that mean she intends to force me to give up? Imprison me? My hand snakes around to the rifle on my back. It's empty, but that doesn't mean I won't use it to defend myself.

"Peace, Seth. I do not intend to harm you," Celestia reassures me, though I don't believe her in the least. "There's something I have to tell you about Sombra."

"Spit it out, then." At my insistence, Celestia nods, taking a breath.

"Sombra is gone. Luna and I destroyed his empire together, dissolving his physical body and crushing his army," she revealed. At her revelation, my blood runs cold. My shoulders slump, and I look down at the ground. So this was all pointless anyway.

"So...there's nothing to take revenge on...?" I ask weakly. Celestia nods, and my spirits are crushed. Now what's the fucking point? From the depths of sorrow, a fresh wave of anger rushes forth.

"FUCK!" I cry out furiously, slamming a fist into the wooden wall, ignoring the pain that results. "This...THIS ISN'T FAIR!"

Celestia watches in silence as I storm around the room on a rampage, grabbing a flower vase and hurling it at the ground, where it shatters. I break and smash everything in my way, my anger dulling my senses. It doesn't matter that this stuff isn't mine. I just need to break something.

Whenever I break something, Celestia's horn glows yellow, and the affected object repairs itself and returns to its previous location. It doesn't matter how many times I break the same object; Celestia repairs it without fail.

She waits patiently until my anger runs its course, resulting me kneeling on the ground with a torn book in my hands. "What...what the fuck am I supposed to do now?" I murmur to myself, tossing the book aside, where Celestia repairs it and places it back on the shelf where it belongs.

"I'm not saying you should forget your loved ones. But Twilight and her friends are good ponies. I don't think you'll believe me at first, but they're not like the humans that you appear to despise," Celestia finally says, perceiving now as being the best time to approach me. I give her a suspicious look.

"What makes you think I hate my own race?" I demand. She's right, but how the fuck would she know how I feel about them? And what makes her so certain they're not like humans? They act practically the same way.

Celestia gives me a knowing smile. "Please, Seth. I can learn a lot simply from one simple conversation. For example, you identified with Luna when she distrusted you, and accused me of being naïve. Something must have happened between you and fellow humans to make you believe that trusting another is a weakness."

"Yes, but..."

"It's also clear that you believe that when one expresses kindness to you, they possess some ulterior motive. That being said, when you are treated with genuine kindness, you don't know how to react," Celestia continues, and my jaw hits the damn ground. How the hell can she sum me up so easily just from one tiny conversation? This...what is this shit? She's like, mind-fucking me.

"So let me ask you: please give Twilight and her friends a chance. They aren't perfect, but they are genuinely good ponies. I believe that you and them could become very good friends," Celestia requests, gazing down at me comfortingly.

I really want to argue, but at this point, I just don't have the will. What would I even say? There's too much shit that I can recall to prove that humans are indeed worthless, but her argument is that ponies aren't like humans. There's been nothing to prove her right, but I can't prove her wrong either. So many things have happened since I got here that I just can't explain.

"I can't promise anything," I say softly, finally meeting Celestia's gaze. "But I'll give it a shot."

Celestia's smile grows much wider at that, and she offers me a hoof. I take it, and she hoists me to my feet without expending much effort.

"That's all anypony can ask for."

* * *

Well, now here's the character development you all have been screaming for! There's going to be a lot of soul searching Seth throughout this arc, with most of it coming into play either next chapter or the one after the next.

Writer's block hit me at the part with the long conversation between the sisters and him, but I got through thanks to really good music, which I've linked into this chapter.

I'm a bit concerned on if I managed to portray Celestia and Luna correctly. Leave me a review and tell me how I did!


	12. Loyalty

I can't believe I said that. I cannot believe I just fucking said that. I can't believe that any of this is happening.

I'm standing in Twilight's room, with Princess Celestia a few feet away from me, smiling gently. With a resigned sigh, I rest my back against the wooden wall and rub a hand against my brow. I essentially agreed to stop being such an ass to Twilight and her "friends." It occurs to me then that I don't know who her friends are. I'm assuming Rarity is one of them, given how Twilight mentioned her earlier. Wait, at the party, Twilight had spoken with Applejack, Rainbow, and Vinyl. If those are her friends...then I guess it could be worse. I live with Vinyl, and she seems pretty chill. Applejack...well I'm still mad at her for forcing me to take her sister to school.

Then there's Rainbow. I have no idea what to think of that pony. On one hand, she's got an ego the size of Montana, but on the other...she's a lot like Amaryllis. Tomboyish, rough, and fiercely loyal were all traits the two of them shared.

So yeah...it could be much worse. I mean, Pinkie could be one of her friends after all. That would suck so much, especially after I'd torn the poor mare a new one just yesterday.

"Are you ready to return to the others?" Celestia asks me softly, snapping me out of my thoughts. I hesitate, and then nod, not really in the mood to talk.

The princess and I walk back down the stairs and into the main room once more. What awaits me is a very beautiful sight.

Luna's horn is glowing a dark blue, and a faint ray of light emanates from it. Projected in the air around the center table is the image of a cluster of stars and galaxies, which Twilight is gazing at in awe while scribbling down more notes.

The moment we enter the room, Luna terminates the spell or whatever it is she's doing to make that image appear, and the two of them watch us worriedly.

"Princess, are you all right? We heard a commotion upstairs," Twilight immediately asks, standing up and galloping over to us. I walk right past her like a zombie, my facial expression devoid of all emotion. While Twilight is talking to Celestia, Luna is watching me, probably curious as to why I look so different. Actually, I'm probably being foolish. She probably knows exactly what I'm feeling, having been one of the ponies who killed Sombra before I had a chance to do it myself.

"I am fine, Twilight. I was merely helping Seth understand something. I can fill you in later if you'd like," Celestia responds kindly.

"No," I say out of impulse, not even realizing I said it until I see the surprised and curious expressions of the other three ponies. "I'll do it myself."

"All right. I would actually prefer she hear it from you," Celestia concurs, her surprise turning to satisfaction. No...I'm not doing this because of what you said. I just don't want you telling her about something as personal as this. If my secrets are going to be spilled, it will be on my terms.

"Sister, art thou finished? No doubt the council is in an uproar, given our sudden departure," Luna questioned, sniffing derisively when she mentioned the council. Usually, I'd feel the need to question that. Why do they need a council if the two of them are in charge of the country? Or are they figureheads? I should ask...but I just don't feel up to it right now.

"I believe we are done here. Twilight, I entrust Seth's well-being to you," Celestia decides. Twilight gasps, while Luna looks aghast. Even I give her an incredulous gaze. What the fuck does that mean? I can take care of myself.

"Me? Look after the first human in Equestria?" Twilight exclaims. I can't tell whether or not she sounds incredulous or excited.

"Sister, what is this madness? Humans art violent creatures. Surely it wouldst behoove us to return to Canterlot with him?" Luna protests, gesturing at me with a hoof.

"That aside, I don't need looking after. I'm perfectly able to take care of myself," I add. Celestia shakes her head, as if she's admonishing a foal.

"I do not mean to insult you, Seth. I only wish for Twilight to help you acclimatize to living in Equestria," Celestia clarifies. I'm still not convinced. I've done well enough on my own so far. I don't need the help of some sequestered librarian pony. "Luna, what he needs isn't to be isolated in the castle, where the other ponies will gawk and gossip about him. No, what he needs is the kindness and love that I know Twilight and her friends can show him."

"Still here, thank you," I point out, but I'm practically ignored. I huff irritably. I wish they wouldn't talk about me like I'm not here. Plus, kindness and love? Two of the most fake emotions to ever exist. Not to mention really cheesy when used in a serious conversation like this.

"I beg thee, at least place some of our guards here in Ponyville, if only for our peace of mind," Luna insists.

"I assure you that won't be necessary. Seth has been here for almost a week now. If he planned to hurt our subjects, he would have had many opportunities to do so before now," Celestia reasons.

"You ponies can be ridiculously annoying, but I'm no murderer," I tack on, staring at the floor. Don't get me wrong, there are many points in my life where I've wanted to physically hurt someone. Sometimes, I've even acted on those thoughts, resulting in fistfights with my peers in my early years. But...I never thought about killing anyone. I still don't. I won't be able to bear to see the life leave someone's eyes. There's enough pain in this world. I won't become like the rest of the shitty human race and add to it. Hah, listen to me. I seem like a whiny bitch, even on paper.

"We do not like this," Luna says, acquiescing with bad grace.

"I won't let you down, princess!" Twilight exclaims, hopping up and down. Yup, she looks excited. I figured as much.

"I know you won't. Now, if you'll excuse us, we must return to Canterlot, lest the councilors work themselves up into a panic," Celestia says, cantering gracefully towards the door and opening it with her magic. "It was good to meet you, Seth."

"Likewise, I guess," I reply uncomfortably. There may be some merit to what Celestia says about ponies not being like humans. At the very least, she's different. I've never met anyone who acts like she does. She's in a class of her own. Unique. Beautiful. The way the morning sun reflects off of her flowing mane is just gorgeous...and what the fuck did I just think?

"Feel free to send me a letter whenever you'd like," Celestia offers, gazing at me. I snap out of my thoughts and nod mutely. Satisfied, Celestia shares one last nuzzle with Twilight, and then to my utter shock, she walks up to me and gives me a nuzzle as well, her snout rubbing gently on my cheek for a short moment before she backs away. It happened so fast I didn't even know what was happening until she was already walking out the door with Luna.

I stand there paralyzed, my hand resting on my cheek where Celestia had nuzzled me. I'm guessing that nuzzles are the ponies way of showing friendly affection, kind of like how humans hug one another. No one had ever hugged me apart from my mother and Amaryllis, and the latter had only done it the once. In Equestria, I'd been "hugged" by Apple Bloom, Derpy (if you can even call that a nuzzle), and the fucking Royal Princess of the Sun in less than a damn week.

"Hey, Equestria to Seth," Twilight calls to me with amusement, prodding my leg with a hoof. I look at her to see she looks the slightest bit smug. I flush when I realize she's seen how off guard I am. Damn it, she better not think less of me for this. I'm not weak! I'm just...unused to this place. These ponies. I don't...fucking...what even.

"What?" I grunt, averting my face to keep her from seeing my blush.

"Have you had breakfast yet?" Twilight asks. Almost on cue, my stomach gives the most obvious of growls. Goddammit. My blush deepens as Twilight giggles at that. "I guess not. What do you say we go eat somewhere?"

"Why would I..." I begin, but then stop myself.

"So let me ask you: please give Twilight and her friends a chance."

"Sorry, but I can't afford to eat out," I correct myself before I finish my snide comment. I still don't feel like eating with Twilight, because I'm used to eating meals on my own. But I did say I'd give them a chance, and I do keep my word. Goddammit, why did I say that? All this is doing is opening the both of us up for future pain.

"Don't worry about money. I'll pay for you," Twilight offers, but then she claps a hoof to her mouth when she realizes what she'd said. I give her a firm look.

"Absolutely not. I won't be in your debt any more than I already am," I asserted with a grim expression, referring to when she'd forced me to be healed by her.

"Don't look at it that way. I won't try and get anything out of you for this, I promise. Your happiness is all I want," Twilight pleads, desperately trying to get me to change my mind. It's not working.

"That's bullshit if I've ever heard it," I scoff, trying not to gag at how cheesy that line sounded. Please, no one really thinks that way. "Sorry, but I'll just buy something from Golden Harvest on my way to work."

"You are so stubborn!" Twilight huffs, adopting that adorable pout. "How about this: if I pay for your breakfast, you tell me about what Celestia spoke to you about while we're there."

"What are you talking about? I was going to tell you about that anyway," I demand, unsure what she's trying to pull here. Twilight adopts a devious smile at my question.

"Yes, but you never did say when," Twilight says. I freeze, and her smile becomes triumphant. Shit, she saw right through me.

"Dammit, fine. Using favors to get stuff out of me. Just like every other human," I relent, slightly irritated.

"Don't talk like that. I'm only proposing an even trade because you're too paranoid I'll hold my favor over your head or something," Twilight counters. I don't have a retort for that. For a moment, I feel like telling her exactly why I know she would hold a free meal over my head, but then I stop. I've blown up enough today. Not to mention I'm not ready to tell anyone that story just yet. I don't even want to relive it myself. I shudder just thinking about it. My breathing quickens and I start to sweat. Shit, I need to think of something else.

"Whatever," is my delayed response. That's the most accurate summary of my thoughts right now. Twilight's smile returns, and she opens the door with her magic. Shaking my head and scowling, I stride out the door, Twilight following close behind me.

The town is starting to wake up, ponies trotting out of their houses to head to work or wherever. While we walk, I get the usual glances, most of them angry or curious this time for whatever reason. However, I notice that some of them are looking at us in shock. Maybe it's because this is one of the few times I'm not alone. Or maybe they know Twilight. Fuck it, I don't care.

"Do ponies always stare at you like this?" Twilight asks quietly.

"Yup," is my terse response. I don't know why she cares anyway. Maybe she's jealous I get more attention than her. That wouldn't surprise me.

"I'm sorry. That must be uncomfortable for you," she empathizes, pressing her muzzle against me in what I'm guessing is supposed to be a comforting manner. To me, that's just...odd. Over time, I've just started looking past their appearance and viewing them as just more humans. That being said, it's really jarring when they break human societal customs and start doing shit like that. For all I know, it's normal for them.

We continue the rest of the way in an awkward silence. I don't think Twilight knows what to say to me. In my case, I just prefer to pretend she's not there.

She eventually takes the lead from me, since I don't know what place she has in mind. When we pass the path that leads to Sweet Apple Acres, I have a miniature heart-attack because I think she's leading me to Applejack's for breakfast. Thankfully, we continue past that until we reach a decently sized building crammed between two other houses or businesses. Fucking, I don't know how to tell the difference yet.

"This is it. Armare's. I sometimes come here with the girls when we're all free," Twilight explains, pointing towards the entrance with a hoof. It looks pretty nice inside. Not quite a French restaurant, but definitely fancier than a fast food place. If I had to make a comparison, it's closest in style to someplace like IHOP.

"What do they serve?" I inquire, following her inside. Before she can answer, the stallion earth pony at the front behind a counter greets us.

"Welcome to Armare's! Hello Miss Sparkle. Will you be wanting your usual table today?" His greeting is crisp and proper, yet he's got a wide smile on his face. Huh, cheery demeanor and he knows her name. I feel like I've walked into a place run by Publix employees. As usual, his eyes widen slightly upon seeing me, but he doesn't comment. Probably knows better.

"Yes please. Just two this time around," Twilight replies politely. The stallion gives a small bow, which looks odd from a pony, and then fishes out two menus.

"Right this way please," the stallion requests. We follow him through the groups of other ponies, almost all of whom look up at me in awe as I pass by.

"Oh, Seth! Hi!" a voice greets me as I pass by a particular table. I turn my head, and I see none other than a very hated mint green unicorn. Shit, it's Lyra and Bon Bon. What are the fucking odds of this? Lyra is smiling and waving a hoof at me. I turn my head away without saying anything, ignoring the fact that she'd spoken to me. Her smile drops in an instant, her expression turning distraught. "Seth, please!"

"Seth? What was that all about?" Twilight questions as we're led to our seat, which to my dismay isn't that far away from Lyra. I give a pointed glance at the stallion who is seating us. Twilight gets the hint.

"Somepony will be with you shortly. Have a nice day!" the stallion expresses, handing each of us a menu. I still don't know how these ponies grab stuff like this with hooves and no hands. Probably better not to ask.

"Seth?" Twilight repeats once the stallion leaves and we're relatively alone. I grunt in annoyance. I honestly don't feel like telling her, but I did say I'd try being friendly.

"That bitch thought it would be a good idea to try and flirt with me," I scoff, ignoring Lyra looking at me sadly even now. Twilight tilted her head, looking bemused.

"Really? Are you sure she wasn't just being friendly?" I give her a very irritated stare at her words.

"Please, Twilight. I've been alive long enough to be able to read the signs. That was flirting, and it was disgusting," I snap. We pause our conversation for a short moment when a waitress comes by, asking if we want drinks. I order some water, and Twilight follows suit. When she's gone, we continue.

"Why is it disgusting? I mean, I doubt it was serious. You can't have known her for very long," Twilight presses. Is she really asking these questions? Why should I have to explain myself? No one ever...fuck it, she's always explained herself to me.

"Because I don't want to fuck animals!" is my very diplomatic response. I can see Twilight taking offense even as I continue. "I don't care if it was serious or not. It's the idea of it that is revolting."

"Seth, we're not animals! I don't know how things were in your era, but we're intelligent, not driven by instinct like you claim," Twilight argues back, her brow furrowing in anger.

"You're animals to me. It doesn't matter how long I spend here in this crazy world. That will never change," I say off-handedly. It doesn't matter how she words it. I will always see these ponies are more cartoony versions of the ones I know. I'd never fuck a pony in my era, so I'd never fuck a pony in this era just because they can talk.

"Seth, that's not fair! You can't judge us just because we look different from you! That's downright bigotry!" Twilight snaps at me, slamming a hoof on the table.

"Whatever. I'm not going to suddenly think differently of your species just because you think it's wrong," I reply, not really caring. Twilight opens her mouth, but then the waitress returns with our drinks, so we glare at one another sullenly until she leaves.

"Tell me then. What are you going to do? There's no humans here. If you ever want to find romance, you'll have to look past our appearance," Twilight points out while I take a sip. This time, something about her argument strikes a chord within me. I set down the cup hard and narrow my eyes.

"Look, I'm giving you a chance because Celestia asked me to. I've having a hard enough time accepting that I supposedly need friends. Why the fuck do you think that I'd even _consider_ romance?!" I shoot back, ignoring the empty feeling in my chest. Her words cut me deeper than I want to admit.

"She what?!" Twilight gasps, her eyes widening. A few seconds later, she adopts an expression of understanding. "So that's what Princess Celestia spoke to you about?"

"Pretty much. I got this whole, 'by the way, Sombra is dead and you should get the fuck over yourself' speech. Albeit with different words," I reveal, and then I drain half of the cup of water.

"She's right, though. Nopony, or human in your case, can handle being alone all their life," Twilight whispers. "I found that out myself, only a year ago."

"Well, I don't believe that," I grunt, my spirits falling further. We fall into silence once more, neither of us having anything more to say. I know she's technically right, and I'm being an incredible bigot, but...I'm not suddenly going to decide that ponies are sexually attractive or whatever just because there's no more humans around.

For the first time, I pick up the menu and peer down at it. What the hell is all this? Hayburgers? Hayfries? Daisy and dandelion sandwiches? What the fuck? Right, they're ponies. They eat like them too, though it doesn't make sense that they eat like we do. Is that just more evidence of human influence?

"Is there anything I can eat on here?" I mutter, forgetting that I'm not alone. Twilight tilts her head at me curiously.

"Do humans not eat hay?" she inquires. I give her a flat look.

"Hell no. We can eat grains like you do, but mostly we eat meat and dairy," I explain. Twilight visibly looks queasy after I finish talking. Oh, does the fact that I'm a carnivore make her uncomfortable? I make sure to give her a grin that shows off my canines. "Personally, I like a nice juicy steak."

"O...oh...well, that's...nice...?" Twilight stammers. I burst out into raucous laughter.

"I'm fucking with you, Twilight. I like meat, but if it's not readily available, it doesn't matter to me," I chortle, holding my sides. Twilight gives an annoyed huff. "Now, what the hell should I eat?"

"You said you ate grains, so you should be able to eat the pancakes," the librarian suggests, pointing at the item on the menu with her hoof. That gets my attention.

"Holy shit, they have pancakes," I utter in awe. "Welp, I know what I'm ordering."

The waitress dropped by a few minutes later with a pitcher of water on her back, which she uses to refill our drinks. We give our orders to her. I order a moderate portion of pancakes, while Twilight orders an omelet with hash-browns. So everypony is a vegetarian here, seeing as they eat animal byproducts. That will make this less painful.

The food is here very quickly for some reason. Like, five minutes after she leaves. How the hell does that work? Wait. I'm answering my own question. Magic.

A plate of steaming pancakes dribbled with warm maple syrup is placed in front of me. My mouth immediately begins to water. Oh my god.

Twilight giggles at the look on my face. "Just wait until you taste it. There's a reason I come here."

Thankfully, there's some silverware placed here for me. I guess they do have silverware at some of the fancier places. Perfect. Using a knife and fork, I cut into the pancakes and lift a piece to my mouth.

Oh my _god_, it's like sex in my mouth. I give a small moan at how fucking amazing this is, compared to everything else I've eaten here. The cake from Pinkie's party notwithstanding.

"You're really enjoying that, aren't you?" Twilight says with an amused grin.

"Shut up and let me enjoy this in peace," I grunt at her, digging into the pancakes. Goddamn, this is really good. To think that I can eat it for free. I didn't even have to tell Twilight much about that conversation in her room because she figured it out on her own.

Twilight isn't really one for being proper. She's practically sticking her face in her food, and it's getting all over her muzzle. I bet Rarity would have a fit.

When we're finished, Twilight pays the bill up at the front desk, and then we leave the restaurant. Thankfully Lyra and Bon Bon had left earlier than us, so I didn't have to run into them. It's now around the time when I should be getting to Applejack's.

"I need to go to work," I tell Twilight, crossing my arms.

"All right. I should be getting back to my studies, anyway," she acknowledges, nodding her head. "Just...please try to make some friends. I know you'll be better off for it."

"Pfeh. I'm strong enough to handle myself without them," I scoff, turning away. Twilight starts to protest, so I interrupt. "Look, I will try. I told Celestia I would."

"Thank you. That's all I wanted," Twilight expresses. Then, with one last wave, she leaves for her library, leaving me alone in the streets. Well, relatively speaking of course. There are still other ponies around me.

I should get to work. With that in mind, I travel down the streets until I'm standing back at the entrance to Sweet Apple Acres. Just a short walk, and then I'll be hard at work on the farm again. And for what? For money to eat and keep a place to sleep. Then I'll just get up the next morning and do it all over again. Can I really keep doing that for the rest of my life?

No. I don't want to do this. I can't do this. Almost as if guided by an outside force, my feet turn and face away from the farm, propelling me instead towards the open fields in the general direction of the Everfree. I don't know where I'm going. I don't know what I'm doing. All I know is that I can't go on like this.

This isn't what I wanted out of life. I don't know what I wanted, but this isn't it. I don't want to waste my time on a fucking farm surrounded by colorful ponies. Not when the cost for it was losing my family, and...Amaryllis.

I brood further as I walk further away. I walk so far I end up in Ponyville's outskirts. Yet for some reason, the urge to move doesn't die down. I ignore everything in my way. This includes the ponies that stare at me, or even the house across a small river that looks like it's been roofed with leaves. One time, I even think somepony calls to me. It might have been Flitter, if I remembered correctly. I ignore that too. Don't try to stop me. The terrain gets hillier and more rugged the more I travel, with several treacherous drops evident the closer I get to the Everfree.

I finally come to a stop at the top of a massive cliff that drops down into a rushing river, situated just a few meters away from the first trees of the forest. This probably isn't a very safe place to be, knowing how close to the forest I am. But safety isn't the first thing on my mind right now.

Twilight was right. I really am going to be alone for the rest of my life. There's not a damn thing in this life to look forward to. There's no chance of me ever finding romance, if such a thing even exists. After all, isn't love just lust in disguise? Lust is disrespectful.

Come to think of it, that was probably one of the reasons I never said anything to Amaryllis about my feelings for her. If I were her, and someone were to come up to me and say, "by the way, I'm really in love with you," my first response would be to punch him in the face and say, "yeah no, you just want to fuck me." I mean, I suppose I did feel that way towards Amaryllis, if I'm really honest with myself. I told myself it was more than that though. I wanted to see her happy. Someone like her should have been smiling more often. But...in the end I was probably just deluding myself.

It doesn't really matter anyway. She's dead. I need to face facts. I'm the first human to ever walk the earth since the apocalypse, and it doesn't mean a damn thing. Even if Celestia is right and there are ponies that aren't like the humans I remember, it's too late. I'm past the point of no return. I'm too broken to ever enjoy a meaningful relationship, platonic or no.

"Heh." I chuckle to myself as I stare out to the horizon, standing on the very edge of the cliff. "This is what it all comes down to, doesn't it?"

Fuck humans. Fuck ponies. Fuck friends, family, and love. Fuck life for dealing me such a shitty hand.

As I look down into the abyss before me, I feel strangely calm. Hope, dreams, and happiness...where do they come from? Where do they go? We spend our whole lives searching for a meaning to this pointless existence, and once we die, none of it matters anymore. What's the point in living, if everything eventually has to die?

Here I linger, like the dying flame of a candle as its wick melts to nothing. Just like a homeowner throws away the useless lump of wax once it's purpose is served, no one will care when I die. So why make it last longer?

My decision is made. I'm not waiting around any longer. One quick glance to the bottom of the cliff shows me sharp rocks and rushing water waiting for me. It's deep enough that the fall should kill me.

I'm not going to hesitate. I've never been a coward, even if this is technically the coward's way out. I don't care though.

My foot moves forward. I don't need to say anything. Nothing needs to be said. I won't say something like "Oh, goodbye cruel world!" Like anyone ever said that. Yeah, life is cruel. Everybody knows that. That's no reason to do something like this. When somebody is driven to harm themselves like I'm doing now, there's more to it than that.

A breath leaves my lungs as gravity takes over. I deliberately allow myself to unbalance and topple over the edge. Almost immediately I can feel that nauseating feeling that comes from falling. Wind whips past my face, sending my hair fluttering in the air behind me. Time seems to move slowly for me.

Maybe if I had been born anywhere else, I wouldn't be like this. Maybe I'd have had a chance for a normal life somewhere else.

I swiftly look back over my life, the rocky rapids getting closer and closer to me every passing moment. I remember my early life and childhood, and how vicious mankind was to me the moment I was exposed to them. Oh, I didn't realize it at first. Everything was fine...until...Janna...showed me what humans were really like.

I smile ironically and close my eyes, mentally bracing myself for my incoming death. Goodbye Amaryllis. Maybe I'll be granted one last kindness, and I'll be able to see you again in an afterlife. A bitter chuckle escapes me at that thought. Then, the rushing sound of the rapids overpowers my every thought. This is it.

The next sensation that hits me is not at all what I expected. The first thing I hear is a sound akin to thunder. The earsplitting noise washes over me in a painful shock wave that I can practically feel. When I open my eyes, the only thing I can see are the colors of the rainbow flashing across my vision, blinding me until I have to shut my eyes again.

Something grasps me around the middle, two appendages of an unknown nature wrapping around me and holding me close. The amount of force with which the object hits me is enough to completely change my trajectory, diverting me away from my imminent death on the rocks. I can feel myself being propelled at a speed that makes roller coasters look like a kids toy. I'm going so fast that it's painful, and even the sound of the rapids is distorted. What the hell is going on? Why am I not dead?

I eventually slow down as whatever it is that has me decides to take me back to the ground. I feel myself being laid against the ground on my back. Soft grass tickles me through my torn clothing, and a slight breeze gusts over my face.

"Whew, that was close, even for me!" Wait a minute. That...scratchy female voice is familiar to me. Oh, you have got to be fucking kidding me. You fuckers had to even ruin my death, as well as my life?!

I shoot upwards, my eyes snapping open into an immediate glare, directed at the infernal cyan colored pony sitting on the grass not far from me. Rainbow Dash gives me a smile, panting slightly. Her mane is slightly damp from sweat, clinging to her face in tangles. She adjusts her mane with a hoof. "Relax, buddy. You're safe now."

"What the **fucking hell**, Rainbow?! I don't recall _ever_ asking for your help!" My angry, almost primal shout takes Rainbow aback. My throat slightly hurts from just how loud I screamed. I reach my hand around to my rifle, though I'm not quite sure what I plan to do with it. To my surprise, Rainbow's eyes flash angrily, and she walks closer to me, getting in my face.

"What do you mean, 'what the hell?!' No, buck that, what the hay, Seth?!" Rainbow yells back at me, surprisingly echoing my foul language back at me. And it seems like she used some of her own as well. "Jumping off a cliff like that? What's wrong with you?"

"I don't have to tell you anything. Why the fuck didn't you just stay out of my business? Why can't any of you fucking ponies just LEAVE. ME. ALONE!?" I'm standing now, my rifle in my left hand, though I'm mostly leaning on it because of how sore I feel. Though I don't know why I feel so sore.

"What are you talking about? I pulled off a Sonic Rainboom just to get here in time to save you, and this is the thanks I get?" Rainbow snarls back at me, her face looking just as frightening as that one time at the party, when she threatened to beat the shit out of me. "What were you thinking? Were you trying to get yourself killed?!"

It hits her a few seconds later after I don't respond, instead averting my gaze and looking down at the ground. Rainbow's eyes widen, and her angry expression melts away, instead becoming one of pure and unadulterated shock. Actually, it won't be much of a stretch to call that traumatizing. Look at these little ponies running around in their happy idyllic world, not a care in the world. The idea of someone trying to end their own life probably never occurs to them.

Suddenly, Rainbow's hoof slams into my cheek, pure pain erupting from the point of impact. She hits me so hard, my head snaps to the right, and white lights flash in my vision. I clutch the affected cheek and stare at her in disbelief. Holy fuck, did she just hit me? She hits _hard_.

"Why...why would you..." Rainbow stammers out, and to my shock, she's actually crying. Not like, tears streaming down her cheeks crying, but more like I can see her eyes are wet. "You...you were, weren't you?"

"What does it matter to you, anyway? Scared that the only human in the world might disappear before you can get anything out of him?" I taunt, my right hand forming a confused gesture subconsciously.

"You...you **idiot!**" Rainbow's shout rivals the one I sent at her earlier. "Why would you ever want to...to kill yourself?!"

"If I didn't tell you anything before, I'm certainly not going to tell you anything now," I snap at her, furious that she's forcing me to stay in this shitty world. Just fuck off so I can try again, bitch. Rainbow glares at me in frustration. For a moment, I think she's actually going to leave, but then she gets closer.

"No, you know what? I don't have to take that. You're not going anywhere until you tell me why, buster!" Rainbow jabs a hoof in my face to embellish her point. My response is to laugh in her face.

"Like you can stop me. I'm going back to town," I tell her, turning my back on her and walking away.

I don't get more than a few feet before Rainbow clamps her teeth down on the collar of my shirt and yanks me back to where we started. I unbalance in the process and fall on my back. Then, the air whooshes out of my lungs as Rainbow's hoof slams down onto the middle of my chest, keeping me in place. "Yeah, tough luck, buddy. Like you can escape me, the fastest pegasus in Equestria," Rainbow sneers down at me.

I struggle as hard as I can, but I can't budge her. It's only now, when I have the chance to look at her up close, that I notice the powerful muscles rippling underneath her skin. She's...a hell of a lot stronger than I am, and she's not even an earth pony. She must exercise a ton. That means Applejack would probably be even stronger. I'm really nothing here.

"You ready to talk now?" Rainbow demands, hovering just above me, her wings flapping at a rate far beneath what they should be to keep that kind of body mass airborne. Fucking magic. I give her a slight nod, and she lifts the hoof from me.

I'm embarrassed to say that I immediately took off like a rocket, hoping to outrun her. I might as well have tried to reach the moon. She caught me easily, but that didn't stop me from trying over and over again. It's really childish of me to avoid my problems like this now that I write it down, but at the time all I want is to get away. I don't want to let anyone in. Not anymore. Not since the only ones who understood me died. I won't tell her. I can't tell her.

No matter what I try, I can't escape Rainbow. If I try to lose her in the canyon, she cuts me off from the other end. I also try to get away by throwing dust and rocks into her eyes, and I actually manage to get pretty far, but she zooms in like a fucking rocket and takes me all the way back kicking and screaming. I even try to run into the Everfree Forest in the hopes that I can get myself killed by a timberwolf or something, but she easily stops me then.

Finally, in one last desperate attempt, I attack her physically with my rifle. The way she takes care of me is just laughable. She easily deflects my strike with a hoof and then disarms me by striking the wrist of my right hand, which held the rifle. My flailing, uncoordinated punches don't do shit to her. She flies around them like nothing, and then lays me flat with a double hoofed bash to my chest.

I don't move, staring up at that infuriatingly blue sky. I try to catch my breath, as I'm panting heavily from all of the exertion. Rainbow's barely panting at all. She's ridiculously strong compared to me. Is there no way out of this?

"You done?" Rainbow asks simply, sitting back on her haunches, unamused. She wipes some of the debris from my earlier attempts off of her muzzle, being surprisingly patient with me.

"Yeah..." I groan miserably. I can't bring myself to say anything a for several minutes after that, even when my breath returns. It's starting to sink in. Rainbow's not going to let me leave until I tell her why I want to die. She's perfectly capable of enforcing that, too. Dammit, why was she even out here?

Rainbow waits for me to say something patiently. Well, I say patiently, but I can tell Rainbow is just hiding her impatience. She's fidgeting ever so slightly in place, and she even whistles a tune at one point, though how a pony can whistle is beyond me. She's a pegasus. I bet she's not used to staying in one place for very long.

"Why are you doing this?" I finally say after at least ten minutes of silence. Rainbow glances at me in confusion.

"What do you mean? Doing what?" Really, is she really going to act clueless?

"This. What does it matter to you if I live or die? Is it because I'm the last human?" I clarify for her. She actually has the gall to look offended at that.

"What? No, I don't care that you're human. Yeah, the books were good I guess, and it's interesting that one of you is around after thousands of years. But in the end, you're just another sentient species, like the minotaurs or zebras," Rainbow defends herself. I raise an eyebrow. Did she just say "minotaurs" with a straight face? "Look, it's not that big a deal to somepony like me. You're just like another pony to me. Who cares what you look like?"

"Then what is it? What would make you go out of your way to save my life, when I clearly didn't want you to?" I press further, eager to know exactly what it is she thinks she can get out of me. Because I'm not going to give it to her.

"Because you're not a bad guy. I mean, you're kind of a jerk at times, but that doesn't mean I would just let you die," Rainbow answers confidently, earning an incredulous splutter from me. "I knew you had problems, but I didn't think they'd be so bad you'd want to die."

"Are you crazy? I hate you. I hate you and every single pony here. How the hell can you assume that I'm 'not a bad guy.' I'm the worst kind!" I throw back at her, unconvinced. Out of all the expressions I expected, I did not expect her to look coy.

"Who are you trying to convince here? I know you're not all that bad. I saw you, you know," Rainbow questions mysteriously. I freeze. What is she talking about?

"What...?" I utter, but Rainbow keeps talking.

"With Derpy, I mean. You could have easily left her there, stuck to that mailbox. But you didn't. You helped her out without expecting anything in return," Rainbow clarifies. Shit, she saw my one moment of weakness. I open my mouth to protest. "Did you stop there? No, you helped her move that box all the way to her house for nothing."

"That proves nothing," I grunt, even though she's got me fair and square. I didn't have to help her...but the way she looked...she'd been like a kitten. How cruel would I have to be not to help her? And...I'm making excuses. She's right.

"It totally does. You're a nice guy, somewhere underneath all the jerk," Rainbow points out. I chuckle a bit at her lack of eloquence. "A guy that apparently needs a friend something fierce."

"There you go again. I don't need friends," I scoff derisively.

"So you say, but you want them, don't you? If you didn't, then I doubt you'd be throwing yourself off cliffs," Rainbow accuses me. How is it that these ponies can look right through me like this? First it was Twilight, then it was Celestia, and now Rainbow, the last pony I'd ever expect to help me. I'd pegged her as a worthless jock the moment I met her. "Don't lie to me. Don't you want somepony to relate to? Somepony to understand you, and have your back when you need it?"

"Sounds perfect, but I'd have to be a fool to believe that you ponies are more capable of that than my race was," I answer truthfully. Before Amaryllis, I'd told everyone that I didn't need any friends. Friendship caused pain, once they were finished using you and dropped you for their next victim. But secretly, I'd really wanted someone I could really relate to on a base level. I longed for it. I needed it. But it just wasn't happening, so I continued my life in a dull depression, days blending into one another into an endless cycle of disappointment.

Just when I'd discovered true friends in my brother and Amaryllis, I'd had them both taken away in the worst possible manner. They were dead now. So what was the point, if life itself is determined to keep me from having friends.

"It sounds to me like you're waiting for somepony to prove you wrong," Rainbow suggests, and that gives me pause. She...probably worded that better than I did in the past few pages. She's right. My entire life, I've been waiting for people to prove me wrong about how shitty the human race was. Two people did. And those two people were my friends.

"Yeah, I suppose I am," I admit softly, and Rainbow finally puts on a victorious grin. She flies over to me and wraps a hoof around my shoulders, causing me to tense up immediately.

"Well, look no further! I am your pony! I am the very Element of Loyalty, Seth, and I'm sticking by your side from here on out," Rainbow declared brazenly, and my jaw nearly comes unhinged. Just...what?

"What are you talking about? You can't just declare yourself my friend. Pinkie did, and that was annoying as fuck!" I snap at her, but she doesn't look deterred.

"Well, I just did. You probably won't consider me a friend until you know more about me, right?" Rainbow states flatly. I nod in confirmation. "And how in the hay are you going to do that if you keep running?"

I honestly don't have a response for that.

"I don't know what all of your issues are, but I've got your back. I only want one thing from you," Rainbow prompts me. My spirits fall like a rock. There's the damn catch. Of course you want something. Everyone wants something from me in a friendship. It's not fair! Why is everyone out to use me?! Just before I can give her a piece of my mind, Rainbow puts a hoof on my mouth, hushing me. "Just live. Live, and find happiness."

She removes her hoof, but I find my protests dying in my throat. That...has to be one of the most selfless things I've ever heard. No one in my entire life has ever said anything like that, to me or anyone. That line is something you'd hear out of a movie or book, because why should anyone care if anyone else lives or dies? They just turn their heads and drink their coffee, because it isn't their problem.

My composure slips, and a tear runs down my cheek. I blush furiously when I see that Rainbow can see it, but she's not laughing. There's one of the kindest smiles I've ever seen on her face.

A few moments later, she facehoofs, groaning slightly. "That _has_ to be the sappiest thing I've ever said."

"A bit yeah," I agree casually. After a few moments of silence, Rainbow starts to chuckle. Heh, it is a bit funny when you look at it from the outside, isn't it? Soon enough, I start chuckling as well, and then we break out into full blown laughter. And _goddamn_ it felt good. I haven't laughed like this since I got here, and I had forgotten just how much stress a good laugh can relieve.

You know what, maybe this isn't so bad. I'm still alive, and I may be forming my first friendship in Equestria.

Maybe...everything will be all right.

* * *

So that random guest who commented actually called what was going to happen in this chapter. Yeah, I had him attempt suicide. And honestly, it was a very difficult decision trying to decide who was going to save him. That also had me come up with several dumb ideas.

Pinkie flew up with her weird pedaling flying machine, grabbing Seth out of the air. "Yoink!"

Twilight captures Seth on the way down with her magic. "Are you throwing yourself off cliffs again? What have I told you about that?"

Applejack hurls her lasso and grabs Seth by the ankle with it, nearly killing him with the whiplash. "YEEHAW!"

Rarity catches him with her magic. "Honestly darling? Suicide must be done in style! Throwing oneself off cliffs is so last season."

Fluttershy rides in on a fucking eagle to catch him. "YOU. SHALL NOT. FALL!"

Welp, stupidity aside, now things start getting positive, I believe. Unless some other bullshit happens.


	13. A Thawing Heart

Applejack looks up as Rainbow Dash and I walk through the wooden arch into the main operation area of the barn. Big MacIntosh is there as well, and Apple Bloom is probably still at school. She looks surprised to see me, which makes sense, considering I'm several hours late for work. It's funny how attempted suicide can mess up your schedule. Wow...I'm so dark I can joke about my own death.

"That you, Seth?" Applejack calls to me. Of course, me being me, I jump at the first opportunity to make a sarcastic comment.

"No, I'm some other human from three thousand years ago. You tell me," I respond casually, walking right up to her and her brother. They look like they were in the middle of gathering apples, like I'd helped Applejack do my first day of work. I guess with winter on it's way, they need to gather as much as possible.

"Fair 'nuff I guess. Yer a bit later than usual," Applejack observes, while Rainbow snickers behind a hoof. That small sound causes the farmer to look up and spot her. "Rainbow Dash? What're you doin' here?"

"Just thought I'd chill with my new buddy Seth," Rainbow replies nonchalantly. Applejack looks at her with surprise, and then looks at me. I'm giving Rainbow an askance look myself. I'm not sure how I feel about her referring to me so familiarly, and in public. Yeah, I don't hate her as much anymore, but I'm still waiting to see if she can live up to her word before I actually consider her my friend.

"Uh...y'all sure 'bout that?" Applejack clearly isn't convinced either. Rainbow puts on this air of confidence as she swoops around me, resting a hoof on my shoulder.

"Heck yeah! The two of us are just so awesome, we had to be friends." Applejack and I both raise an eyebrow at that. Did she just compliment me while at the same time, stroking her own ego?

"Uh..." Applejack begins, but I cut her off with an impatient wave of my hand. At this point, time is money.

"It's fine. Just tell me where I can be most useful." Now that got a reaction from Applejack. She looks at me like I've grown a second head. She probably thinks I just admitted to Rainbow being my friend. She can think whatever she wants. I don't care. I just want her to shut up so I can work.

"Sure...I guess. Well, the snows are comin' soon, so we need ta git all them apples bucked," Applejack begins, getting over her disbelief. Huh, so that means more heavy lifting. "Jus' foller me. Ah'm headin' back out there in a bit."

I acknowledge her with a nod, standing with my arms crossed. It suddenly crosses my mind as the fingers of my right hand rub along my stiff shirt that I never paid Rarity a visit. She's probably got some of my clothes ready. Eh, I'll go see her after work.

Applejack gives a few directions to Big MacIntosh, and then we head in the direction of the field. I can see many more trees that need to be harvested. I also notice that Rainbow Dash is still following us. When she said she was going to stay by my side, I didn't think she meant literally.

"What, do you plan on helping us work?" I say, addressing the multicolored pony, who is currently doing lazy corkscrews above us.

"Hah, yeah right. I'm here for moral support," Rainbow declares. I roll my eyes. Moral support. Seriously? She doesn't even do that. While Applejack and I start to work, Rainbow zooms up to the cloud layer. Now get this, she fucking brings down a piece of cloud from up there and plops down on it like it's a couch or something. Yeah, I can't really believe it either. "I'll be napping up here. Let me know if anything cool happens."

"Dammit, Rainbow," I mutter to myself, moving the baskets to where Applejack directs me. I think I can skip describing this part of the work, since it's literally just the same thing I did the first day.

No, what I do feel like mentioning is what I overhear when Applejack and Rainbow think I'm unable to hear them.

I can hear them right now, faintly, talking about the snows or whatever that Applejack mentioned earlier. They're standing by the tree while I'm lifting the baskets filled to the brim with apples into the cart. It's only when I hear Applejack say my name that I really start to pay attention.

"What about him?" Rainbow answers, lowering her voice. I can still hear her though, if I listen carefully.

"Weren't y'all the one that kept callin' him a jerk? What changed?" Applejack asks curiously. Peeking back, I can see Rainbow looking slightly sheepish.

"I...may have been wrong about him," she admits haltingly. Applejack looks downright shocked at that response.

"What? That ain't like you. Don't it take y'all much longer ta change yer opinion o' somepony?" Applejack follows up, stepping closer to Rainbow.

"Well...things changed. I'd tell you more, but I doubt he'd like it if I spilled the beans. You know how it is," Rainbow explains, shrugging.

Okay, now I'm starting to respect her.

Understanding dawns on Applejack's face. "Oh. Yeah, okay. Ah'd be lyin' if ah said ah didn't wanna know more, but ah won't pry."

Rainbow opens her mouth to say something, but then she spots me watching them. My expression is unreadable as I watch her face turn from surprise to guilt in less than a second. Applejack soon notices as well, and she immediately approaches me. "Ahright, ah think this cart's ready ta go back," she says, regarding me uncertainly. I think she's wondering if I overheard them.

Rainbow approaches me on her cloud as I follow Applejack, while she's pulling the cart back. "So...how much did you hear?" she asks me tentatively. I shrug nonchalantly.

"All of it," is my uncaring response. It's not really that big of a deal. I've had worse things said behind my back before.

"Oh...uh...yeah. So...I didn't tell her." It's pretty easy to tell that Rainbow has no idea how to approach me about something like this.

"So I noticed. I appreciate it," I tell her, my voice monotone. Rainbow sports a grin at my relatively positive response, and then does a flip.

"See? I told you I got your back!" she proclaims, causing me to roll my eyes again. I think she's trying too hard at this point. Give up. It's going to take more than that to convince me you're worth my time. For all I know, she could have known I was listening, and that's why she didn't say anything. That way she can garner good will from me. Too bad, that won't work on me.

* * *

Work continues until the sun starts to set, and nothing really notable happens. Rainbow and Applejack talk to one another idly as we work, and occasionally I chime in if I'm addressed, though I never utter more than a few syllables per response.

I did manage to learn a few things from listening. For example, the "snows" refers to the first official day of winter, when the pegasi gather the clouds and prompt snowfall. Though why these ponies choose to bring winter when it's apparently optional is beyond me. You have magic. Refresh the soil through that, or is there some rule saying you can't? This fucking world makes no sense.

Maybe I can get warm temperatures around Vinyl's place, since the head of the weather team has declared herself my friend. Actually, scratch that. That makes me a hypocrite, now that I think about it. I hate that people only want to be friendly so they can get something, and now I just considered doing the same. Glad I caught myself.

I'm now standing in Applejack's living room, resting against the wall with Rainbow next to me. Applejack is upstairs, grabbing my money. I think I have four bits still with me, and I worked about four hours, so that'll put me at eight. My damn suicide attempt cut into my revenue. Go figure.

"So where are ya staying?" Rainbow asks me suddenly, nudging me. Big MacIntosh, who is also in the room with us, watches me for a response as well.

"What does it matter?" I ask irritably, inspecting a small cut on my hand for splinters. Damn those baskets.

"So I can drop by whenever I want, of course," Rainbow answers as if it's the most obvious thing ever. Okay, already I don't like what I'm hearing.

"Sorry, but I'm not saying. There's times when I just want to be alone, and that won't happen if everypony knows where I am," I tell her flatly. Suddenly I realize something. "I just said 'everypony,' didn't I?"

"Eeyup," Big MacIntosh chimes in helpfully. I groan and let my face fall into my hands.

"Fuck, this place is affecting me. How long have I been saying it?"

"For a while now," Rainbow points out, and then she laughs as I groan again. I had sworn to myself that I'd never say that fucking word, or any variations of it, and I'm failing at it. It's like, subconscious at this point. I'm sure there's some psychological explanation for this, but I barely passed that class, so I don't fucking know. "But seriously, I know. I'm not going to be like Pinkie and bother you till you come hang, so what's the harm?"

"The answer's still no. It's bad enough that Applejack and Twilight know where I live," I retort, frustrating the pegasus further.

"What about if I tell you where I live? You know, even trade and all that?" Rainbow persists.

"Let me guess, on a cloud," I joke sarcastically, but to my surprise, Rainbow looks amazed.

"Wow, how'd you know?!"

"Are you fucking kidding me?" I ask rhetorically, throwing my arms up in the air. That had totally just been a joke making fun of the whole "pegasus move clouds" thing, but I'm actually right? It's like this life is trying to remind me that I live in a fucked up world.

"Look, Seth, I respect that you like having alone time. I do too. Heck yes, I love flying around with nopony else nearby." Rainbow finally gets serious, looking into my eyes. "But I promise, I'll respect that. It's what friends do."

"Friends, huh," I repeat, still unconvinced. But...now that I remember, I did tell Celestia I'd give these ponies a chance. "Fine. I'm living with Vinyl Scratch right now."

"Whoa, really? She's really cool. I bet you'll like her," Rainbow assures me, grinning. Just then Applejack walks down the stairs with my money in her mouth. She cranes her head back and sets the sack on her back.

"Yep, she's a decent sort. Ah'm glad ya took her offer, Seth," she says, joining the two of us. I give her a smoldering glare, disliking how she butted into our conversation. I'd call her out on it, but she's got my money.

"Whatever. Money?" I snap. Applejack seems disappointed at my cold treatment towards her. With a sigh, she hoofs over the sack to me. I take it and glance inside, and then I add my current funds to the new sack, resulting in a total of eight bits. That leaves me two bits for food tonight. Oh wait, I have a gig with Vinyl tonight, don't I? So I can save my money and gorge myself on free food.

"There ya go. Wanna stay fer dinner?" Applejack asks. Wait really? Again? How many times is she going to ask me that? My answer is never going to change, so please stop trying.

"Yeah, I'm gonna go with no," is my response. Just like always, Applejack nods her head understandingly.

"Okay," Applejack responds, as always. I shake my head in confusion, and then make for the door.

"Later, AJ!" Rainbow calls back to her friend, following me out the door, which I shut behind me.

I don't get very far before I run into Apple Bloom and her friends, on their way back from school. Their reactions upon seeing us vary.

"Seth!" Apple Bloom exclaims happily, galloping to me excitedly.

"Rainbow Dash!" Scootaloo also exclaims, zooming to my companion at a similar speed. Sweetie Belle stays back, as she notes my presence. She and Scootaloo are the only ones that treat me as they should. It's Apple Bloom that confounds me.

I kneel down to greet Apple Bloom as she reaches me. By squatting all the way down, I can get on her level. She's only about two feet tall, really.

"Hey," I respond awkwardly. Ever since I cheered her up before, Apple Bloom has been acting really friendly with me. Is that just childlike...well I guess I should say foal-like naivete? Or does she, like Rainbow Dash, believe that I'm somehow a decent individual?

Apple Bloom takes me off guard by nuzzling my cheek affectionately. I nearly overbalance and fall backwards, but I push forward to keep myself upright. However, that means I unintentionally lean into Apple Bloom's nuzzle. She gasps softly, thinking I'm actually reciprocating her gesture. Following this is a happy..."squee," I guess, and the nuzzling intensifies.

Well, it wasn't my attention to reciprocate, but I guess there's no real harm if she likes it that much. When she pulls back from me, Apple Bloom is practically beaming. "How're ya doin' today?" she asks me eagerly. You know, I'm not used to hearing that question. Nobody usually gives a fuck how my day is going.

"Well, it's been one roller coaster of a day, that's for sure," I answer cryptically. There's no way I'm telling a little filly what went down today, but I won't lie to her at least.

"A what kinda day, now?" Apple Bloom gazes at me, perplexed. I stare blankly back. Do ponies not have theme parks? How do they not know what a roller coaster is?

"Ponies don't have roller coasters?" A shake of the filly's head confirms my suspicions. Wow, it sucks to be them. "Basically, humans have a cart that runs on a metal track that goes up and down hills for entertainment purposes."

"So yer day went up n' down hills?" Apple Bloom questions me, not understanding at all.

"Metaphorically speaking, yes." The filly still looks confused, so she turns to Sweetie Belle.

"Sweetie Belle, what does 'metaforkally' mean?" Apple Bloom inquires, butchering the pronunciation horribly to the point where I can't help but snicker under my breath.

"Metaphorically," Sweetie Belle corrects her, which leads me to believe she may be the most academically intelligent one of the three. Her next words compound that assumption. "It means he's making a metaphor, a figure of speech comparing two unrelated objects."

"Ah think ah get it...yer day had its ups n' downs?" Apple Bloom tries once more, looking back at me.

"Exactly," I affirm. Damn, we just wasted about a minute on a simple greeting. Then again, I am talking to a filly.

Apple Bloom presses up against my side, turning so that her face is next to mine. "Ah'm sorry yer day had it's downs," she expresses. I assume this whole physical affection thing she's got going on is her attempt to reassure me. These foals. They really are like human children, except ponies. Also, Apple Bloom is a remarkable filly. Girls her age back in my era were spoiled and bratty, growing up to become trash not worth anyone's time. There's really no comparison between their behavior and Apple Bloom's. She's a lot more mature than I'd expect.

Then the filly brightens up. "Ah know! You should come play with us at our clubhouse!" she suggests excitedly. My eyebrow shoots up. Are you kidding me?

"Uh...Apple Bloom," Sweetie Belle interjects hesitantly. I guess I'm not the only one who's not altogether thrilled with this idea. Okay, so I don't mind talking to Apple Bloom. I have to draw the line at playing with fillies. No fucking way.

"Hey, you can't just invite that thing into our clubhouse!" Scootaloo snaps, breaking away from her conversation with Rainbow, who immediately looks at me in alarm as I rise back to my full height.

"But Scootaloo," Apple Bloom protests, but I beat her to it.

"This 'thing' has a name, you brat," I shoot back at Scootaloo, my eyes narrowed. "I suggest you watch your tone with me."

"Or what? You gonna threaten me like you did Sweetie Belle?" Scootaloo counters. Huh, that's one brave little filly.

"H-hey, cool it, you two!" Rainbow chooses now to get between us. My hand had been reaching for my rifle subconsciously, but when I see Rainbow, my hand falls away. "Scoots, you should be more willing to give him a chance."

"But...Rainbow Dash, he..." Scootaloo starts, pointing a hoof at me, even as I smirk in victory.

"Seth, you shouldn't be so quick to yell at a filly," Rainbow then says to me. My eyes widen in shock.

"Did you just fucking scold me?" I asked in disbelief. Rainbow catches my gaze and holds it, her stern expression meeting my incredulous one.

"She's a _filly_, Seth. You can't hold her to the standards you do everypony else," Rainbow reminds me.

"I most certainly can," I mutter under my breath, turning away. Thankfully, Rainbow doesn't hear me, so she thinks I've backed down.

"He's just a bully, like Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon," Scootaloo huffs, though she too backs down. Think whatever you want, brat. But if you get in my way, I'll make sure you regret it.

"I'm leaving now. I have shit to do," I declare, and then I start to walk down the path that leads back into Ponyville. You know, a part of me dies every time I write this damn town's name.

"But...don't ya wanna come play?" Apple Bloom asks me pleadingly, following me for the first few steps.

"Of course not. Besides, even if I did, clearly I'm not welcome," I respond spitefully, not even slowing down. Apple Bloom is very fast, though, enough to trot next to me as I walk.

"Please?" Now, Apple Bloom pulls the worst trick something like her can possibly pull. She looks up at me with the most adorable expression I've ever seen. She's got those damn puppy dog eyes, and her lower lip is just barely poking out. No...I have...to resist...fucking...goddammit.

"Fine, but not today," I relent with a heavy sigh. "I really do have things to do today. I need to drop by Rarity's and get some clothes, and then I have a gig with Vinyl. I'll come grab you tomorrow or something."

"Yay! Thank you!" Apple Bloom cries happily, and then she responds by throwing herself at me. Caught by surprise, I reflexively reach out my arms, and she falls into them. Her momentum causes me to fall back on my ass with a very happy filly in my arms.

"All right, all right," I say, chuckling a bit. She wiggles in my arms and nuzzles my chest adorably. She's really so innocent. I'm almost envious of her. "I gotta get moving, though."

Apple Bloom nods and gets off of me, allowing me to stand back up and dust myself off. "Ah'll see ya tomorrow then!" The filly smiles widely, and then she gallops back to her friends.

Rainbow is talking to Scootaloo about something back at the barn. I can't hear them, but Scootaloo doesn't look happy. I wonder what they're talking about.

I don't plan on waiting. Rainbow can catch up later if she wants. Or not. I don't really care. I just know I'm not escaping this land of magical ponies so easily.

Just like the other day, I decide to take the quicker path through the park to Rarity's place. There's no sign of Lyra anywhere, so it's safe to pass through the fountain clearing.

There are some other ponies in this area, unlike the last time I was here. To my disgust, two of the ponies here are kissing. Gross! Can you not do that inside or something? Talk about rude. Suddenly, I realize that the two overly loving ponies are both female. I'm sorry what? I'M SORRY WHAT?!

Yeah, humans are overly homophobic. Chances are, if something like this happened at my college, it would be a scandal, and the two offenders would probably be suspended. If not that, then they would be avoided and ridiculed by the other students until the rumors died away. Knowing that, I almost cry out in shock. Are homosexual relationships allowed here? Because it doesn't look like the other pony that is here really cares that much.

I...guess I'll ask Rarity or something. I don't want to stare, so I keep moving. That's a lot to take in.

Just as I approach the hill that leads up to Rarity's, I spot something that makes me freeze dead in my tracks. So remember what I said about Lyra not being here? Life has once again decided to go the path of "let's screw this Seth guy," because now she's standing right at the foot of the hill, her lyre hovering in the air just in front of her.

It doesn't take her long to spot me. Lyra gives me a smile and a wave, almost as if she believes that attempting to be nice will get me to forget that she wants me to have sex with her. "Hey there, Seth. Can I talk to you for a moment?"

"No, no, no, a _million times_ no," I express firmly, much to her despair. I turn around, shaking my head in annoyance. "Oh my god, no."

"Come on, it'll only take a moment!" Lyra begs, following behind me, back towards the fountain.

"Hey! How about no?" I snap back at her, completely uninterested in anything this disgusting pony has to say.

"Please! I'm sorry!" She continues to follow behind me, drawing the attention of the other ponies in the fountain area as we walk into it. Upon ignoring me, Lyra's face turns from sorrow to desperation.

Suddenly I can't move. No matter how much I strain my primary motor muscles, they just won't move. A quick glance over my body confirms that I'm encased in Lyra's mint green magic. "That's just not fucking fair."

"I'm really sorry, but you just won't listen any other way," Lyra says apologetically, though it does little to calm my rising anger. What the hell is she planning to do, now that I can't move?

"We're in the middle of the fountain plaza! Do you really want to do this here?!" I yell at her, referring to the several ponies that are in the area as well, who are all looking at the scene we're causing, nonplussed.

"No, you're right. We'll move elsewhere," Lyra admits, and then I'm moving. I'm not kidding. Apparently not only can unicorns freeze me in place with their magic, they can also move me, and there's not a damn thing I can do about it.

"Put me the fuck down!" I scream at her. I'm not comfortable at all like this. She can do whatever she wants to me now. Hell, any unicorn can! What the hell does Lyra want with me anyway?

My blood runs cold as my thoughts run over her possible, more darker motives. How serious is she about fucking me? Am I going to end up raped in an alley somewhere? I swear to god, I'll fucking tear this pony limb from limb.

Unlike what I was expecting, Lyra puts me down on the bridge that spans the river close to Sweet Apple Acres. She releases me from her magic, and honestly I'm tempted to book it away from her. I have no idea what she's planning, but that magic worries me. I should ask Twilight if I can counter it somehow.

"Give me one good reason why I shouldn't bash your damn head in and run," I growl at Lyra viciously, causing her to recoil back.

"I'm just trying to apologize to you! I'm sorry I had to bring you here forcefully, but you just wouldn't give me a chance!" Lyra protests. Holy shit, she's actually crying.

"I have no interest in..." I begin, but Lyra shocks me yet again.

"JUST BE QUIET AND LISTEN!" she yells at me tearfully. I'm so surprised I just stop talking. She never really seemed like the kind of pony to be so assertive, but first impressions are never reliable, I guess. "I'm sorry. I didn't think that what I said in the plaza before would make you never want to talk to me again. Please, can we forget it ever happened?"

"Sorry, but no. I can't look at you anymore without thinking about it. You're just plain fucked up, being interested in a different species," I respond bluntly. Lyra looks crushed. "Especially me. There's nothing about me worth _that_ kind of interest."

"But...it's not that uncommon! Relationships between consenting adults of two different species are accepted in Equestria!" Lyra argues. That gets me to pause. What? Seriously? Nopony cares if one of them is fucking a minotaur or something? How is that possible? Back in my era, the very idea of interspecies relationships was total taboo. Which probably had something to do with the fact that there weren't any other sentient species. However, even in fiction it was looked down on. There are the crazies of course that draw twisted shit on the internet, but those are widely considered to be worthless scum, an opinion I agree with. Hell, if I'd have considered fucking a pony in my time, I'd have been ostracized in a flash.

"Okay...let's assume I believe that," I say slowly. Suddenly something hits me. "Wait, so you were interested?"

Lyra's response is to blush and look at the ground. Un-fucking-believable.

_"Why?!"_ I demand, throwing up my hands. Lyra is silent for a few moments as she tries to compose herself.

"Well...you're...not that bad to look at. I especially like your mane," Lyra stammers out, her blush intensifying. I'm struck speechless by her compliments, while a hand subconsciously reaches up and runs through my hair.

Everyone has just insulted my appearance, for as long as I can remember. Of course, my mother tells me I'm handsome, but she's biased. It's the same as one obese mother telling her obese son he's handsome. No, I'm used to people telling me I look like a damn girl, with how smooth and rounded my face is, and how my hair is always long and glossy. The insults weren't that bad in college, but the further back in my life you go, the worse it gets. No girl would look at me, because the guys who hated me would just tell everyone I was gay. What with the way I looked, it wasn't that hard for someone to look at me and say, "Yeah, I can believe that." Once a rumor like that takes root, you don't get away from it.

"That's bullshit. You're lying to me, right?" I stammer. Lyra shakes her head.

"No, I'm serious. I bet the human mares were all over you," she affirms. My expression turns darker at that. I just got through thinking about that.

"Yeah right. No girl's ever looked at me twice," I snap irritably. Now Lyra looks shocked.

"But, why not? I don't understand. I'm not sure what human mares find appealing, but you're...striking," Lyra presses. The more she compliments me, the more she blushes. Ugh, she totally wants me. This is...if she was unable to freeze me in place whenever she wanted, I would just fucking leave.

"Hell if I know. Now, back to the original subject," I reply. Lyra nods shyly. "I appreciate the compliments, but I'm not interested. It doesn't matter how accepting you are. I'm just not attracted to ponies."

Lyra nods, taking it a lot better than I expected. "Okay. It's probably better you tell me now. I mean, I didn't want anything right then and there, of course," she explains with a giggle. "I was just trying to see if you were the kind of stallion I'd enjoy dating."

"So let me get this straight. You weren't soliciting me for sex, but just casual flirting to see if there was mutual interest?" I say, rewording her explanation to see if I properly understood.

"That's right. I'm not _that_ easy," Lyra agrees, giving me a cheeky grin. I grunt and cross my arms, thinking. I'm not going to lie, I still find the very idea of a pony hitting on me absolutely deplorable, but at least now I know that she wasn't trying to fuck me right after she just met me. I despise women like that, and that extends to mares.

"All right. As long as you remember that I'm not interested, I guess I can overlook it this time," I relent. Lyra's expression becomes radiantly happy, and she moves forward and hugs my waist.

"Oh, thank Celestia. I thought I'd ruined our friendship because I was being a little too forward," Lyra sighs, her head resting against my stomach. Goddamn, are all these ponies so damn huggy? Not to mention, I don't recall considering you a friend in the first place. I'd call her out on that, but I just got through one of her tearful rampages. If she's anything like Rainbow, if I tell her that I'm not her friend, she'll probably hold me here until I explain why. I'm going to avoid that trap.

"Whatever. Can you get off me now so I can go to Rarity's?" I request, fidgeting uncomfortably. Lyra giggles and backs off, her front hooves planting back on the ground with a soft clop.

"Sorry. Will I see you at Vinyl's gig tonight?" she inquires hopefully. Shit...she's going to be there. It's probably better that we talked things out now, because it would have been super awkward if we'd tried to do it at the bar.

"Yeah. I'm helping her set up," is my terse response.

"All right! I'll see you then," Lyra calls after me while I'm walking up the hill to the Carousel Boutique. I don't reply, feeling that there's nothing more to say.

That could have gone much worse. No, the only thing that bothers me is how all these ponies think it's okay to force themselves on me. Whether it's Rainbow with her insane speed, or Lyra with her magic, I just can't get any time to myself. I can't wait until I get enough money for my own place. I'll never go outside again once I get to that point.

A few knocks on the door alerts the inhabitant of my presence. The door swings open and Rarity is revealed. She puts on a small smile when she sees me. "Oh! Do come in, darling, I have several outfits ready for you to try," she addresses me eagerly. I really wish she'd stop calling me that.

Following her inside, the first thing I notice is a human mannequin standing in the center of the room. Huh, I guess she made that after taking my measurements. There's an outfit on it right now.

"I must say, I had expected you earlier," Rarity hums while she rummages through one of the closed off areas behind curtains.

"The princesses had other ideas," I remark, staring at the mannequin. It's sporting a dark violet, long sleeved shirt, with white strips around the collar and cuffs. Violet's not a color I usually wear, but at least it's a darker shade that I can tolerate. As for the pants...there is a genuine set of blue jeans there, with pockets and everything. Wow, that's just impressive.

"Really? The princesses came to visit you?" Rarity stops what she's doing for a moment to look over her shoulders at me. When I nod, she gives a small gasp. "Oh, I envy you the pleasure. Aren't they just _divine_?"

"They're something else," I agree. With the two of them in charge, I can see how this place is as peaceful as it is. One of them trusts no one, and the other appears to be caring and benevolent. The combination of those two traits is a force to be reckoned with. "By the way, how the hell did you manage to replicate my jeans to such perfect detail?"

"Oh, you like them? I was worried you wouldn't." Rarity practically glows at my question. "It was mostly trial and error. You have no idea how many tries it took me before I could get the details just right."

"So you reconstructed these from memory?" I query. Hell, I'm actually kind of impressed. She's only seen them a few times, and she made a perfect set just by looking at the shitty pair I'm wearing now?

"That's correct! Now, would you do me a favor and change into them?" Rarity envelops the outfit on the mannequin with her magic and levitates the clothing over to me, folding each individual article at the same time.

"Gladly. Where can I get some privacy?" I ask, allowing Rarity to place the folded up clothes into my arms.

"Hmm, there's a bathroom upstairs. Why don't you shower while you're at it? No offense, but you smell of sweat," Rarity suggests, wrinkling her nose. I shrug uncaringly.

"Whatever. I'll be back down in a bit," I tell her. Remembering where the stairs are from my last visit, I move through the door at the back. The stairs spiral upwards steeply to save space, but they're built for ponies, so I can walk up several steps at once.

I don't know what room is the bathroom, so I just check every single door until I find it. I end up looking into several rooms, one of which looks like it might be Sweetie Belle's room, and another that is extravagant enough to be Rarity's. There's another staircase that leads up, but the bathroom is the door just before that. I step inside, and immediately start ogling the place.

Wow, this place is nice. Compared to Vinyl's, Rarity's shower is twice its size, and enclosed by gorgeous mottled glass. There's also a tub set into the ground, but that I don't care about. The toilet is tucked into the back right corner of the room. I feel like I don't need to say it, but everything is immaculately clean.

I turn on the shower, adjusting the temperature until it's just slightly past the midpoint. That way it'll be warm, but not too hot. My mother once told me that overly hot water irritates the skin and damages the hair, causing drier skin and split ends. I don't know if I've mentioned it before, but I love my fucking hair. Learning that caused me to say "screw that," to hot showers forever.

Stripping my clothes and rifle away, I heave a sigh of relief. These fucking clothes have gotten so rugged and stiff that they've caused red patches on my skin where they rub against me on a daily basis. Lastly, I set the clothes Rarity made onto the vanity before I finally step into the shower.

Oh my god, the pressure is perfect. Holy shit, is that a place to sit down? In a shower? Goddamn, this is luxurious. Just how much money does she make?

Why am I even describing myself taking a shower? Who knows. I don't make sense to myself either. Actually, that's a lie. I'm describing it because this is when I finally start to feel like me again.

I finish washing myself quickly, resisting the temptation to take a twenty minute nap in there. Once again, I forgo using any shampoo, because I still don't trust pony hair products. This is going to take a toll on my hair, but there's really nothing I can do about it.

Refreshed, I step out of the shower and dry off with a purple fluffy towel. Next, I unfold Rarity's jeans, noticing a separate garment placed inside of it. Are those...boxers? Yes they are, and oh my god they feel soft. What are these made of, satin?

I slip them on, enjoying it probably more than I should. As dumb as it sounds, it feels like I'm wearing a damn cloud. The jeans go next, and surprisingly they're a damn good pair. They aren't too tight, thankfully, but neither are they baggy. Then comes the long sleeved shirt. It feels really soft against my skin. It's like Rarity went all out for this stuff. Is it really all right for me to take this stuff? Suddenly I start doubting Rarity's goodwill. Is making clothes for a human really a fair trade for clothes of this quality?

After putting on the socks she provided me, I gather up my old clothes and rifle and head back down the stairs.

Interestingly enough, there's another pony in the front room, talking to Rarity in a very soft, dulcet voice. Her fur is buttery yellow, and her mane is a soft pink, and falls over the side of her face that is directed towards me, so I can't really see what she looks like. She's a pegasus too, if those wings are anything to go by. They don't look as muscular as Rainbow's though, but I suppose that's to be expected. Lastly, that tattoo on her ass is of three pink butterflies. What kind of talent does that indicate?

"Are you sure it won't be too much trouble?" the pegasus asks softly in a voice so damn sweet I feel like it could give someone diabetes.

"Of course, darling! Moving the appointments won't be that hard at all," Rarity assures the other pony with an honest smile. "We can probably do it earlier, as well. How does tomorrow sound?"

"Tomorrow? Oh, that's..Friday. I can do that," the pegasus replies. She opens her mouth to say something else, but I grow bored of listening, so I walk into the room.

"Make plans later. I got places to be," I declare impertinently, striding up to the two of them. The moment the pegasus sees me, she lets out a loud "eep!" and then practically disappears, dashing into the nearest curtained off area. I gaze after her, perplexed. "Aaand she's gone."

"Oh, you'll have to forgive her. She's very shy around new ponies, or human in your case," Rarity explains sheepishly. Glancing back at the curtains, I can see the pegasus watching me shyly from behind the curtains.

"Eh, she can stay there for all I care. I didn't come here to socialize," I grunt, turning away from the shy pony. Rarity gives me a stern look.

"Now, darling, at least introduce yourself. It's only polite," she admonishes me lightly. I raise an eyebrow.

"Polite? Excuse me, miss prissy, have you met me?" I remark, but Rarity's expression doesn't change, despite the not so nice nickname I gave her. "Ugh, fine."

Relenting with bad grace, I face the curtain again, doing my best to put on an approachable expression. Except it doesn't work. The most I manage is a neutral look. "'Sup? I'm Seth Rogers," I say as casually as possible. The pegasus behind the curtain shrinks back at my voice, but eventually takes a shaking step forward.

"Um...I'm...Fluttershy," the pegasus returns, speaking so softly that I can barely hear her.

"I'm sorry, what? I couldn't quite hear you?" I respond, keeping my expression neutral. Fluttershy gulps and tries again.

"I...I'm...F-Fluttershy," she repeats, her voice slightly stronger. Oh my god, this world and its obvious names. Really? She has a butterfly tattoo on her ass and she's shy, so she's Fluttershy.

"Sweet. Nice to meet you and shit. Okay, can we get on with it now?" I say quickly, turning back to Rarity. She still looks disapproving, but she relents since I technically did what she wanted.

"I suppose. Fluttershy, I'll see you tomorrow, all right?" Rarity says to the shy pony, who nods and speeds out the door. "I really wish you'd used a little more tact, darling."

"Cry me a river," I scoff, earning another look of disapproval from her. That look soon changes to one of curiosity, and she steps closer to me. "What are you doing?"

"Just looking at your hair, darling. I can't help but notice that it looks a tad...greasy," she points out, causing me to seethe in anger. Don't you fucking hate on my hair, you son of a bitch.

"That's because I don't know how pony shampoo will affect me. Can you drop it now?" I snap at her, but she doesn't seem to have heard me.

Rarity levitates a stool over to her, which she then hops on. Then, she sticks a hoof into my hair, feeling it. What even the...yeah no. I push her hoof away. "What the fuck are you doing?"

"Hm, I don't think you have anything to worry about, dear. It seems similar in composition to our manes, so they shouldn't adversely affect you," Rarity reassures me. Then her eyes light up. "Oh! You should come to the spa tomorrow with Fluttershy and I! I'm certain they'll help style your hair for you."

"Yeah, that's not happening. I barely have enough money to feed myself, much less go to a damn spa," I tell her flatly.

"Oh please, it's not that expensive. It's just about fourteen bits a visit," Rarity disagrees, waving a hoof at me.

"I have eight bits to my name," I deadpan. Rarity's lips form a small "o." She then attempts to say something else, but I already know what it's going to be. "And no, you're not paying for me, so don't even suggest it."

"Honestly, darling, you really must learn that it's all right to accept a favor every once in a while," Rarity scolds me, but I'm not having any of it.

"And you need to learn to mind your own damn business. Now, didn't you have more outfits for me to try?" I point out. Rarity huffs, but at the mention of her other outfits, she gets a look of such joy, that one thought crosses my mind.

I immediately regret this decision.

* * *

So, lots of things happen in this chapter. Most importantly, Seth finally meets Fluttershy, the last, but certainly not the least of the mane 6. Of course, it wasn't very long, because I had to keep them in character.

Honestly, I almost decided to give up this story, what with all the hate I seem to be getting for it. Thankfully, I chose to keep going, thanks to people like Deadman117, who left me such a nice review that I was inspired to finish this chapter. Thanks, dude, I really appreciate it.


	14. Seth's Renewal

"Before we get started, where did you put your old clothes, darling?" Rarity asks me with a peculiar edge in her voice. I blink. That's the kind of tone my mother would use if she was about to uncover me doing something wrong.

"Uh...I threw them over by the stage," I tell her, indicating the pitiful looking pile of torn up clothes. A demonic gleam appears in her eyes and she lifts up the clothes with her magic. She marches across the room towards a door tucked behind the stage. "What exactly do you plan on doing with them?"

"I'm going to dispose of them. Such garments are not fit even for the likes of diamond dogs." I don't know what a diamond dog is, but with the way her nose is up in the air, I assume they aren't anything special. Hang on a moment, in those pants is my...

"Rarity, wait!" I call out in alarm as she passes through the door. I curse and follow her through the door and into a large kitchen. What the hell, is she going to burn them?

Rarity is standing in front of her oven, which is open and looks to be already heating up. Yep, she plans on burning them. "Whatever is the matter, darling? Surely you aren't that attached to these." She holds up the clothes.

"Not the clothes. It's what's in them. Give me the pants," I demand, stretching out my hand. Bemused, Rarity sends the torn remnants of my old jeans over to me with her magic. The rough cloth chafes painfully against my skin as I jam my hand in to the front pocket. My fingers feel the rough protective covering that's wrapped around my phone, which makes it easier for me to grasp and pull it out.

"What is that device?" Rarity questions me, watching as I pocket my phone in my new pants. Huh, if someone told me a month ago that I'd be asked by a ridiculous primped up pony to explain a smart phone to them, I'd probably have punched the fucker in the face.

"I don't feel like explaining it. It's as alien to you as magic is to me," I reply, disappointing her. "It's a useless brick now anyway, without electricity to power it."

"It needs electricity to work?" Rarity looks thoughtful, almost as if she's rolling an idea around in that head of hers. After I confirm with a nod, she smiles. "Why, you should go to Canterlot. Many ponies there have electricity of some kind."

"That's not the point. You can't just shoot electricity into this thing. You'll blow the circuits," I explain irritably.

"Perhaps not, but I'm sure somepony there will have the skills necessary to help you," Rarity insists. I can't really think of anything to say to that, so I just grunt instead. "Back to the matter at hand. Is there anything else of value in these pants?"

There's still my wallet and keys in there. I doubt I'll ever need them again, since my car and dorm are currently buried under several tons of earth, and the cash I have in there is useless. Ah, fuck it, I'd regret it if I let them burn.

After fishing them out, I give Rarity the go ahead. A devilish smirk appears on her face, and then she jams my old clothes into the oven and shuts the door. "And now, I have rid the world of fashion's worst crime," Rarity proclaims, looking entirely too satisfied with herself. I can't help but rub my forehead in exasperation. None of these ponies are anything close to normal.

When I look back up, I see that Rarity is looking at me...no, she's actually looking at my hair intently. "What?" I demand, taking a tentative step back.

"Why don't we do something about that mane of yours, darling?" Rarity suggests, following me. "After all, it's your most defining feature. It would be a tragedy if we let it deteriorate."

What. She wants to...it's my...what the fuck? "Absolutely not. Nopony touches my hair. Ever," I vow. "Besides, I don't even want to know what somepony like you would do to it."

"What do you mean, 'somepony like me?'" Rarity accuses, giving an offended scoff. "You don't think I keep my mane styled so fabulously merely through luck, do you?"

"Forgive me for not paying attention to the aesthetics of ponies," I say sarcastically, earning an exasperated expression from her.

"Trust me, I know what I'm doing. Besides, it would be a crime against fashion not to let such a wonderful mane shine!" Rarity continues. Okay, now I feel gay. Yeah, I enjoy the fact that on a good day, my hair shines, but when she says it, it sounds really dumb.

"What if your damn hair products fuck up my hair?" I snap at her.

"Come now, I doubt it'll end up looking worse than a greasy mane. If you'll follow me?" What's up with this mare? It's like she's not listening to anything I have to say..

I watch her walk through the kitchen door and back into the hallway, but I hesitate. I won't lie, I'd kill to have my hair looking normal again, since it's been almost a week since it's had a proper wash. There's so much build up in my hair that it practically leaves residue on my hands whenever I touch it. That's fucking disgusting. Rarity was right about one thing. I did consider my hair my most defining physical characteristic. I'm surprised she picked up on that.

But I'm not sure I trust her to do it. Even back in my era, there was only one barber that I ever allowed to touch my hair, and that was only because she'd been doing it since I was born. Every other barber that got their hands on it fucked it up, and resulted in no payment from me.

"Come along now, Seth!" Rarity calls from the hallway. Goddammit...I guess she's right. It can't get much worse than it is right now.

Following her, I end up in a room that definitely looks like a hair salon. It's constructed a bit differently than the ones I've seen, because everything there is more suited for pony anatomy. Like, the vanities don't have that slot for the neck, because ponies can just fucking stick their heads in. The hair driers are also structured differently. Like, I can't even describe how the handles look, since they're designed to be held by hooves. I don't even.

Rarity once again shows off her creativity, as she's put together a makeshift chair for me to lie back on using a variety of cushions and other furniture. It looks like it's designed to seat me comfortably, while my head and hair is left to hang in one of the vanities. When she hears me walk in, she looks up and then gestures at the chair. "Wonderful! Do take a seat, darling. This shouldn't take but a few moments."

"What exactly are you going to do, anyway?" I inquire, but I do lay back on the chair. It's not that comfortable, since there's a bulge just under my back that's bugging me. Rarity's eyes glow at my question.

"Oh, I'm so glad you asked! First and foremost, I plan on washing your mane thoroughly to get rid of all that build up. Then I'll add in conditioner to add that shine back to it," Rarity describes for me, already gathering the materials she plans on using. Well, she sounds like she knows what she's doing. "Then I have a few stylistic choices in mind. Like, your mane is pretty long, so there..."

"Yeah no. I like it the way it is. Just clean it for me," I cut across her. Rarity looks put out.

"Well, you could do so much more with it...but I suppose it is your decision," she expresses hopefully, but when I say nothing else, she sighs. "All right. Lie still then, darling."

Resting my head back, I shut my eyes, like I always do whenever I'm getting my hair tended to. I shudder involuntarily when a jet of water strikes the back of my head. It's lukewarm water, so after the initial shock, it actually starts feeling relaxing as Rarity wets down the entirety of my hair.

The next sensations I feel are odd, to say the least. For example, I actually find out what a hoof feels like against my skin as she rubs some shampoo or whatever into my hair. It doesn't feel as hard as I expected. You know, from seeing horses and ponies in my era, those hooves look rough, but Rarity's actually feels somewhat soft. Despite that, I can still feel a bit of firmness in them. Also, the weirdest thing was I can feel portions of her hooves moving around to massage the shampoo into my very roots. How the hell does that work? Is that how they hold things with hooves? Man, evolution is fucked up.

"You know, you're not bad to look at. I think that given enough time, you'll make some lucky mare or stallion very happy," Rarity mentions off hand to me, and my eyes shoot open in surprise. Okay, what? Lyra's crazy, but now Rarity is saying it?

"Not you too," I groan, resisting the temptation to rub my forehead. On the bright side, she said it in such a way that it showed no romantic interest at all. Basically it was just a compliment. If Rarity had been a human girl and I had been interested, I probably would be raging because something like that screamed friend-zone. Since she's a pony and I'm not interested whatsoever, it comes as a relief.

"Whatever do you mean, darling? I'm merely stating my honest opinion," Rarity clucks, momentarily removing her hooves from my head. Then the jet of water hits my head again, and she starts massaging the shampoo out of my hair with her free hoof.

"You're ponies. How can you even consider someone of another species to be even remotely attractive? How the fuck do your sex drives even work?!" I blurted out, being particularly blunt in my phrasing. I can't see Rarity's expression, either, so I don't know how she feels about what I just said.

"Now, Seth, don't go reading too far into this. As a fashionista, I work with beauty, and as such I've learned to appreciate it where I can," Rarity explains. It almost feels like she's scolding me. "I've had the pleasure of seeing many species in my life, including griffons, minotaurs, diamond dogs, and dragons. The most similar to you is a minotaur, and to be honest, most of them are simply uncouth ruffians. Compared to a minotaur, you are much easier on the eyes."

"I can understand that reasoning, I guess," I admit, seeing the sense in her words. If minotaurs here are anything like they are in our mythology, then they're probably hideous. If she gives me a comparison like that, hell yes I'm better looking.

"Futhermore, interspecies relationships are accepted in Equestria, if you haven't already heard," Rarity reminds me.

"I did hear that."

"Then it shouldn't come as a surprise that some ponies have a taste for the...exotic," Rarity points out, just as she starts working conditioner into my hair. "You did say that Lyra showed some interest in you, if I remember correctly."

"Yeah."

"I doubt she was the only one," Rarity finishes. A sense of dread pervades me at her words. So there's other ponies at there that have been looking at me like...like that? Fucking hell...I really need to get my own place so I can avoid all these crazy ponies. Wanting to fuck a human...I mean really?

"Guess I should be a bit meaner then, to discourage that," I remark, much to Rarity's horror.

"Why ever would you do that? Having ponies appreciate the way you look is far from a bad thing. Like I said, I think you and a lucky mare or stallion would be very happy together," Rarity protests.

"I'm not having this conversation again. The answer is no. End of story," I avowed. Rarity is silent for a few moments.

"I see. Well then, I shall mind my own business, if that is what you desire." As much as I'm satisfied by that, Rarity's tone is short and clipped, to the point where I can tell she's not happy with me. Get the fuck over it. I'm not going to suddenly decide to fuck a pony simply because you think I'd be happy. On second thought, most of these ponies just expect me to assimilate into their society, despite two decades of human upbringing. I don't need love, which is basically just a sugarcoated word for sex, to be happy. I certainly don't need it from ponies. "I believe I am almost done. All that's left is to dry it."

"Good. I'm probably going to be late as it is," I grunt. Over the next few minutes, Rarity dries out my hair with one of the hairdryers. While she does it, she uses her magic to brush my hair. That's odd. Why would you brush your hair while drying it? Usually I dry my hair until it's only slightly moist, and then comb it. Ow, fuck. Welp, that was a knot.

"Finished! Come take a look, darling. I think you'll be pleased," Rarity announces, a hint of pride in her voice. I sit up slowly, and already I can tell I'm going to like what I see. Like, even before seeing it. I can tell because of how my hair feels when it falls down my neck. Before, it would hang in clumps, knot, and stick to my skin. Now it feels like fucking silk, like it's supposed to. My scalp no longer itches either. Thank god. Having an itchy scalp is maddening.

I get off the chair and look at Rarity, who is holding up a small mirror with her magic. Peering into it shows my ordinary, unblemished face, but now I look so much better because my hair doesn't look like shit. This actually does wonders for my state of mind. I really like my fucking hair.

A second later, I realize I'm actually smiling a little. And Rarity notices, because she is beaming with success. "Finally. Now I don't look like shit anymore," is my outward response, but it's too late. Not even my coarse language can dampen her spirits. She knows I like it.

"Indeed! And now you know our mane products won't damage your mane," Rarity remarks.

"Fair enough. Now, didn't you have some other outfits to show me?" I remind her. Rarity nods enthusiastically, and she guides me back into the main room.

Now, I'm not going to waste time writing down how I try on each and every outfit. It was repetitive as fuck, but the outfits were good. Those I am going to describe.

The first one is another set of blue jeans and a long sleeved shirt, only this time the shirt is white with dark purple rings around the collar and sleeves. Huh, so Rarity essentially made a shirt with her own color scheme on it. I guess I don't mind wearing it. I mean, purple isn't that bad of a color, and I never gave a fuck about fashion anyway.

The second is a bit more formal looking. This one consists of khaki slacks made of a material I can't identify, and a plain black shirt reminiscent of a polo. Huh, that's oddly lacking in pigment. When I questioned her about her color choice, she responds with, "It matches your hair, darling." Fair enough, I suppose.

The third is more of a heavier nature, likely for the winter that's soon to arrive. The pants are made of a much thicker material, similar to sweatpants, only less shitty. The shirt is actually doubly layered. To reiterate, it's basically a gray t-shirt stitched directly onto a white long sleeved shirt that is specifically designed to keep in heat. Additionally, there's a dark green jacket to go along with that outfit.

When I beheld the last outfit, I pause. Picking it up, I show it to Rarity. "What exactly is this?" I ask calmly, holding up the small black shorts that look a little tight for me.

"Oh, that one? Those are swimming trunks, just in case. It never hurts to be prepared, right?" Rarity answers me with a smile. I look back at them unconvinced.

"Really? They look too small for me," I tell her, stretching the material. It's actually more elastic than I expected. Whoa, so it's like underarmor. That's so cool. "Nevermind, they stretch. The better question is, why the hell would I need these in the_ winter?_"

"It's not quite winter yet, dear. The lakes are quite tolerable, even now," Rarity informs me. That's actually good to know. I'm not usually one for swimming, but I do occasionally when I have free time. And by swim, I mean lie on a floating thingy (shut up, I don't fucking know what they're called) and take a nap.

"I see. Anyway, thanks for the clothes, but I need to get going," I say, shouldering my rifle and moving towards the door. Rarity blinks at my abrupt farewell, but she composes herself quickly.

"Of course, darling. Feel free to visit. You're always welcome here," Rarity calls after to me. I wave a hand absentmindedly and then leave the Boutique behind, carrying my clothes in my arms.

It's kind of dumb how fast she warmed up to me. I mean, I threatened her sister and insulted her repeatedly. Yet now I'm welcome at her house anytime.

Come to think of it, she's not the only one who's made a quick turn around. Rainbow did the same thing. We went from bitter enemies to...whatever we are now in the space of a few days. Something doesn't seem right here. Wait...I remember seeing Twilight talking to Rainbow just before the latter started acting somewhat nicer. I feel like there's a correlation.

If Rainbow and Rarity are only acting friendly because Twilight said something to them...then they're honestly just like every other goddamn human, and it would completely invalidate Rainbow's whole "I'm your friend now" speech.

I'm going to confront Twilight about this the next time I see her. If she confirms my theory...I'm probably going to knock her the fuck out and then go find a better way to get myself killed.

Yeah, I'm done thinking about this. It's a good thing I'm heading back to see Vinyl. I need a music fix, and there's no way I'm asking Lyra.

* * *

Vinyl opens the door just after I knock. Her shades are already on, and it looks like most of her stuff is loaded up in the cart already. "Perfect timing, Seth! Come on in," she greets with me with a grin, stepping aside so I can walk past her. "Nice threads, dude. You see Rarity?"

"Against my better judgment," I confirm bitterly. "But at least I'm wearing some decent clothes for once."

"Wow, and it's more than just the threads. You look good, bro. Especially your mane," Vinyl compliments me, causing me to look at her in disbelief. That's three ponies know that have commented on my ma...my hair. "And it helps that you don't smell like a stallion's locker room anymore."

"Pfft. Thanks a lot," I return sarcastically, but I'm not really that mad. She's right, of course. Additionally, I actually like this kind of interaction. "I see your place still looks like shit."

"Eh, fair enough. Anyway, let's get this thing moving," Vinyl responds, not really offended.

"Okay. Let me put all these clothes upstairs," I tell her. After a quick run to my room, I position myself behind the cart again, like before. Like the time two days ago, we lever the cart out the door and onto the streets, locking the door behind us.

"Hey, Vinyl," I say tentatively, getting the attention of my boss.

"Wassup?"

"Have you spoken to Twilight recently?" Vinyl's also been treating me nicely, so I want to see if my theory holds.

"Not since the party. I'm not as close to her as I am to Pinks and Rainbow. Why?" Vinyl answers, sounding curious. Huh...so Twilight hasn't spoken to her about me. Or maybe she's just not telling me. Pfft, so that solves absolutely nothing. It's kind of dumb asking somepony a question if you're not going to trust the answer they give.

"No reason," I grunt, essentially cutting off the conversation there. Or that's what I'd have to liked to have happened.

"Speaking of Pinks, have you seen her recently? I haven't seen her since the party, and that's odd. She's usually always outside socializing," Vinyl asks me, concerned. I tense up at that. Shit, Pinkie's missing? That's...probably my fault. It was just yesterday morning that I yelled at her. My intent was to get her to leave me alone. Did I really hurt her that bad?

"No, I haven't," I respond honestly. I'm not telling Vinyl a thing. I don't want to deal with the self-righteous bullshit she'd give me. In the end, it's not really my problem. Pinkie will get over it eventually, and then she'll leave me alone, just like I planned.

"Weird," Vinyl muses. With that conversation out of the way, the both of us focus entirely on moving the cart. With Vinyl's direction, it isn't very long before we end up at the club...well I guess I should call it a bar, because clubs are something you'd find in a city. You know what, this is my damn journal, I can use what terminology I want. I'll call it a clar...just kidding, I'm not really going to do that.

"Awright, let's get this baby inside," Vinyl directs, and then the two of us hoist the cart over the threshold and into the building.

The first thing I notice is that the place is full of ponies. Some of them I actually recognize. I would say who they are, but my vision is suddenly filled with insanely bright colors. Namely, every single color of the fucking...

"There you are! I knew if I find Vinyl, I'd find you!"

...Rainbow. Welp. Here was me thinking I rid myself of her for today. I guess not. "Well, you found me. Proud of yourself?" I deadpan.

"I'm always proud of myself," Rainbow proclaimed, thumping her chest with a hoof. Then she looks at Vinyl. "Sup, Vinyl? How's it hanging?"

"Pretty sweet, Dash! Pretty great turnout we got tonight. That your doing?" Vinyl returns the greeting enthusiastically. Rainbow swells herself up with self-importance.

"You know it! I did the rounds," she responds. God...these two have energy out the ass.

"Thanks. I appreciate it. Anyway, I'll talk to you later. Seth and I gotta set all this up," Vinyl says, levitating the first box out of the cart.

"All right! Yo, Seth, when you're done, come find me," Rainbow addresses me again. She jabs a hoof at one of the tables in the back. To my dismay, Lyra and Bon Bon are sitting at the table she's pointing at. "Me and a few others are sitting in the back."

"Sure, whatever. Now screw off so I can work," I reply dismissively. Rainbow immaturely sticks her tongue out at me, and then she flies back to her seat.

Then essentially it's just a matter of unloading all of the shit from the cart. This time though, Vinyl actually lets me help her set up the wiring, though she's instructing me over my shoulder the whole time.

"You know why I put the carpet last? It's because of all these wires I got running everywhere. You don't want ponies dancing too close to the equipment without that carpet, because they'll trip on the wires and probably knock things over," Vinyl explains while the two of us are uncoiling the wires. "So make sure to keep the bulk of the cabling in this square area, so we can cover it up with the carpet."

"Where do these cords go?" I ask, holding up the ends of several wires that are labeled with pink tape. I recognize the Equestrian scrawled on it, but I can't read it. It only takes Vinyl a second to identify them.

"Those go to the LEDs. Give me one second and I'll show you how to hook them up," she informs me. I'm learning a lot about setting this stuff up. It's weird, because when we set up for Pinkie's party, all I did was unload the cart and do some heavy lifting. Now she's actually teaching me how to set it up. I'd ask her why, but I don't really feel like it. I'll ask her later.

Vinyl helps me set up her speaker system, which mostly consists of the two of us lifting massive speakers from her cart and placing them strategically around the room to spread the sound around evenly. Some of the speakers have holes in the top.

"These are where the LEDs generally go. You place these metal poles here-" Vinyl levitates several poles out of the cart and passes a few of them to me. "-into these slots. Don't worry about the LEDs themselves. I'll just magic to fix them to the top of those poles."

"Shouldn't you let me do that? You're going to be using magic for hours, and I'm twice your size," I inquire, demonstrating my point by sticking a pole in one of the speakers and then easily touching the top of it. Vinyl blinks.

"Whoa, is that consideration you're showing? You feeling all right, Seth?" Vinyl quips with a grin.

"There's a difference between being considerate and being practical," I remind her impatiently. We're working. Save the jokes for never, please. Vinyl nods her head.

"Sure, sure," she remarks, though it's clear she doesn't believe me. Fucking ponies, man. Moving on, Vinyl unpacked the different LEDs she uses to keep the dance floor lit, and then instructs me how to fasten them to the poles in the correct position and height.

Throughout all of this, I gain a new respect for Vinyl. I mean, even more than the usual respect I give musicians. I never could fathom how musicians think so many different things at once. For example, when setting up for a performance, a musician has to think about what order the songs should be played in to keep the audience entertained, for one. No audience will wait if the musician encounters difficulties with the equipment either, which makes technical experience a must.

Vinyl's got all of this down, judging by the folder she's carrying on her back, as well as how she checks every piece of equipment and every wire for problems. Once she's confident the LEDs are ready, she has me help her set up her tables. Turns out all I have to do is carry them, because she doesn't want anyone touching the controls but her. Makes sense.

"Awright, that should be it," Vinyl declares once we set down the carpet over the mass of wires. I wipe the sweat off my forehead, not used to this kind of exertion. I'm sure my body will get over it in the space of a few weeks, but until then all this heavy lifting is going to hurt. A tentative touch to my primary arm muscles tells me that they're stiff, which means they're going to be sore in the morning. Fucking great. "I'm going to get started soon, so feel free to go out and mingle."

I turn around and walk away from her without another word. Already I feel like I want to be alone. It's been a long day, so I want to rest in the quiet, but I'm not going to be getting any of that.

Somepony prods me on the leg with a hoof, prompting me to stop walking and see who it is. Huh it's Flitter. I assume she just got here, I've just walked past the entrance. "Hello, Seth. Nice to see you again," she says with a meek smile. I cross my arms and look at her wordlessly, waiting for her to continue. She quails when I don't say anything back. "Um...how are you?"

"Fine," is my very short reply. I'm tired and I want to sit down. Please shut up so I can do that.

"Oh...okay. Um...where are you sitting? I mean, just in case you wouldn't mind some company," Flitter tries once more to get something other than a single word out of me. I had thought I'd been cold enough to Flitter to get her to leave me alone, but I suppose note. Letting her think I'd been dancing with her back at the party had been a mistake. Turning back around, I start walking towards Rainbow's table...where she's sitting with Lyra and Bon Bon. Fuck you, Rainbow...I really don't want to sit with them.

"Over with Rainbow," I respond, knowing that Flitter would follow me. She must be really hurting for company if she chooses to run after me. Before she can say anything else, we reach Rainbow's table. They look up as I approach.

"Guess you're done working, huh? Take a seat!" Rainbow requests, slapping an empty spot with her hoof. I might as well. I'm stuck here anyway until Vinyl is done playing.

"Oh, wow, I love what you did with your mane!" Lyra gushes just a second after I sit down. While I wish the praise had come from ANYONE else, I do appreciate it.

"Thanks," I grunt. Rainbow glances at me, and I can see the veiled concern in her eyes. She notices how short I'm being, probably. I don't know what she plans to do about it, though.

"Hey...um...do you mind if I join you all?" Flitter asks awkwardly. Right, she is talking to her boss, I suppose. I'd be awkward too.

"Hey Flitter! Didn't expect to see you here. Heck yeah you can join us," Rainbow exclaims. "Give me one second, I'll pull up a chair."

Rainbow snatches a chair from an empty table nearby and edges it in between me and Lyra, much to my relief. Lyra pouts slightly for some reason as Flitter sits down on her haunches in the proffered spot.

"Oh, you got new clothes," Flitter observes, suddenly. I can't help it anymore. I rub my forehead, getting irritated.

"No, really? I hadn't noticed. Thank you for telling me that I'm suddenly wearing a new set of clothes, a full minute after seeing them in the first place," I shoot back sardonically, and I see Flitter flinch visibly.

"I'm...I'm sorry," she stammers, while Lyra sighs and Rainbow frowns. Bon Bon, however, is a bit more vocal.

"Are you just a jerk to everypony you talk to?" Bon Bon demands. Great, looks like another one is getting defensive with me. At least I know how to deal with fuckers like you.

"Yup, pretty much," I say casually. "Glad we got that figured out. Are you done now, or are you just going to continue stating the obvious?"

"You...I don't know what Lyra even sees in you!" Bon Bon snaps. Only a moment later does she realize what she just said.

"Shh, Bon Bon!" Lyra hisses at her, a blush quickly forming on her face. Rainbow and Flitter all look at Lyra, and then back at me. Apparently neither of them knew about that part, which makes sense considering I only told Rarity.

"Neither do I. Besides, if you're worried about me taking your mare, don't be. I'm not attracted to ponies," I retort, resting my face on my fist, utterly disinterested in this conversation. Bon Bon looks scandalized, and then a light blush appears on her face too. Hah, apparently I hit the nail right on the head there.

"I...don't know what you're talking about. I'm into stallions, thank you very much," Bon Bon splutters indignantly. Uh huh. You might fool these naïve ponies, but certainly not me. I saw the signs. You're into Lyra, so you were probably jealous of me the moment I met you. "It's a good thing you're not attracted to us, because with an attitude like that, you're never going to have a special somepony!"

I can't help it. I cover my mouth as I laugh incredulously. "Special somepony?" That's something I haven't heard before. That's just the most ludicrous way of referring to a love interest. How the hell does she keep a straight face when she says that?

"Okay...that's enough already. We came here to have fun, everypony." Rainbow finally gets sick of our shit and steps in, speaking loud enough that the both of us could hear her. Bon Bon continues to glare at me, but with repeated urging from Lyra, she huffs and returns to her drink.

"Seth, you were never mean to me," Flitter says to me tentatively, ignoring the look of warning that Rainbow shoots her. I transfix her with my gaze.

"Because you treated me with respect, and didn't get on my damn case all the time like these fuckers," I explain, indicating the other three ponies at the table with a hand gesture.

"Oh," Flitter gulps.

A somewhat loud screech from the speakers alerts the room that Vinyl's tables had just switched on. I guess that means she's getting ready to start.

"'Sup, everypony! That's right, the one and only Vinyl Scratch is here to provide you with the best beats this side of Equestria!" Vinyl announces enthusiastically. In response, the ponies in the building, including the ones sitting with me, cheer. "That's what I like to hear! Now with this song, I wanna see everypony lookin' alive!"

The room seems to rumble with the sound of the bass as the song begins. My head bobs a bit in time to the relatively slow beat. It's more dubstep, and a particularly good mix too. I was never that much of a fan of the genre before, but I always did appreciate a well done mix that wasn't obnoxious. Like this one.

"What's up, Seth? You're a bit edgy." Rainbow asks me. I give her an askance look. Clever. She waited to ask until the music prevented most other ponies from hearing us. I mean, I can barely hear her.

"I'm tired, and Bon Bon's a bitch," is my particularly eloquent response. Rainbow cocks an eyebrow.

"She's not that bad. Makes good candy. Did you two get off on the wrong hoof, or something?" she objects.

"Well, the first thing she said to me was, 'oh, wasn't your race dead?' You tell me," I remark, frowning. Rainbow opens her mouth to reply, and then she between Bon Bon and I.

"I see your point. Seems kind of callous," Rainbow admits, causing me to look at her in disbelief. Did she just agree with me? "But come on, lighten up a bit. I'll buy you a drink. Sound good?"

"No. I don't need ponies buying me stuff. Honestly, I just want to go back home and get some time to myself," I reveal. My stomach chooses that time to remind me how hungry I'm getting. A quick glance doesn't seem to reveal any sources of food, though. I had thought there would be free food here, since the last gig had plenty. But maybe that was because it was a Pinkie party or whatever they call it.

"Look, dude, I insist. A cup of apple cider will help you unwind," Rainbow presses, wrapping a hoof around me. Hang on a minute, what? Did she just say apple cider?

"In that case, doubly no. I don't drink, nor do I intend to ever start." Great...ponies have fucking alcohol. You know, one of the worst things mankind ever created. Oh look, here's a drug to help you lose your minds! What genius decided that was a good idea? What genius decided to keep making it after domestic violence increased, fatal auto accidents increased, unwanted pregnancies increased...oh dear god, I can keep going. This proves ponies are exactly like worthless humans.

"What do you mean, you don't drink? Everypony has to drink to survive, right? What gives?" Rainbow demands, confused. I give her a deadpan stare. Are you fucking kidding me?

"No, you idiot. I mean I don't drink alcohol. I have something against poisoning myself to insanity," I snap back at her. Rainbow's ears flatten at my biting tone.

"Hey, I'm no idiot! But...I have no idea what al...alc...alohol is," she admits. Wait what?

"You just said apple cider. Doesn't that have a chemical in it that lowers your inhibitions and makes it more difficult to think clearly?"

"What? No! It just tastes really good, that's all. Who in the hay would drink something with a thing like that in it?" Rainbow looks genuinely appalled at the concept. So...ponies don't have alcohol? That...is a huge relief. Okay, that is one thing about the ponies that I will admit is better than humans. Faith in ponykind a smidgeon restored.

"Humans...just another reason why I hate them," I answer. Rainbow nods, apparently agreeing with that sentiment. "So how much for some of this cider?"

"I think it's like, 2 bits a cup?" Rainbow muses, scratching her head with a hoof. Fuck it, I might as well. I have two bits cushion anyway, so that I'll still be able to afford rent. Rainbow fumbles a bit when I hand her the money. "Go get me one."

"I said I'd pay for it," Rainbow reminds me, but I transfix her with a stare. She holds it for a few moments before sighing and getting up. "Fine...stubborn human."

"Conniving pony," I shoot back, looking down at the table. Rainbow looks at me oddly.

"Pasty-faced giant." I look up in surprise to see Rainbow grinning at me cheekily. A hint of a smile appears on my face too. She wants to play this game, does she?

"Technicolor adrenaline junkie," I retort.

"Whiny jerkface."

"Deformed worm thing."

"Weak-limbed wonder."

"Hoofed blabbermouth."

"Ape with stupid hair." Ohoho...she went there. Well, two can play at that.

"Tiny foal with the fucked up color scheme." Seems like our insults are getting more elaborate.

"Cocky flat-faced mummy."

"What are you two doing?" Lyra, who looks to be on her way to the dance floor with Bon Bon. Apparently she'd overheard us.

"Nothing," Rainbow and I say at the same time, attempting to look as innocent as possible. Lyra regards us suspiciously, and then jabs a hoof at us in a universal "I'm watching you" gesture as Bon Bon drags her off.

Rainbow and I glance at one another. "Snrk." I'm the first one to lose my composure as I chuckle into my hand, finding the entire exchange funny as hell. Rainbow is much less dignified about it, choosing to erupt into very unladylike laughter. "Truce? I really am thirsty," I say, offering my hand.

"Really? No way, dude, I win! But yeah, I'll get you that drink. Be right back," Rainbow proclaims, thumping her chest before trotting through the crowd.

Heh, she's all right. The only people I've been able to randomly insult like that without them getting offended are Amaryllis and Adam. Now, if only I could tell what she's like on the inside.

"I'm going to go dance," a voice says from next to me. Oh right, Flitter is still here. She's standing up now, indicating the dance floor with a hoof. "Would you like to join me?"

"Nah, I'm too tired tonight." Flitter nods at my response, and then she disappears from view as well, leaving me alone at the table.

Of course, I'm not alone for long before Rainbow returns with two cups of cider with her. She slams one down in front of me, bits of froth flying. "There you go: one cup of heaven."

"Heaven, huh? We'll just see about that," I reply, grabbing the cup and taking a gulp of it. Oh my god, fucking ow...shit, it's carbonated...and I just took a gulp without being used to it. Ow...pain...pain. Whew. When the pain passes, I give it another sip so I can actually taste it this time. Oh wow, it's like I'm drinking really good apple juice that's carbonated. "Not bad."

"Right? You think this is good, you should taste it when Applejack's family makes it. Hers is like...what's a good word..." Rainbow responds eagerly.

"Sex for your mouth?" I provide helpfully. Rainbow jerks her head back, looking at me oddly.

"Not...the words I'd have used...but close enough. Is that a human saying?" she says awkwardly, blushing a little.

"Pretty much."

"Dude, humans are weird."

"Tell me something I don't know."

We spend a few moments in silence, just drinking our cider. I'm not going to be able to eat tonight, so I staving it off slightly with liquids is the best I can do.

"Say, Seth, what do you know about pranks?" Rainbow suddenly says, watching me with a wicked grin on her face.

"Where did that come fro-" I start to reply, but then a louder sound cuts me off.

"SETH ROGERS!" That shout sounds familiar. I whirl my head around to see Twilight standing at the entrance, looking right at me.

And boy, she does not look happy to see me.

* * *

More character development for Seth, as well as the breaking down of the walls between him and Rainbow. I hope you're looking forward to the next few chapters as much as I am, because this arc is going to hit its climax very soon.

Also, thank you for all the positive feedback. It's good to know that there are readers out there that don't completely despise this story.


	15. Inner Feelings

I wonder what I did this time. I don't remember ever making her this mad before, even when I was being stubborn.

"Uh oh, she just used your full name," Rainbow points out. "What did you do to make her so mad?"

"Hell if I know. I'm not really in the mood to deal with her shit," I grunt, turning my back on Twilight. Even as I clench my hands around my half empty cup of cider, I know she's not going to leave me be.

"Seth, you come here right now!" Twilight yells at me. She's closer than before. Fuck you, you're not my mother. I don't have to do a damn thing you say. Just to show her how little of a fuck I give, I lift up my drink and take a few more gulps.

"Um...aren't you going to answer her?" Rainbow asks me hesitantly, eyeing the approaching Twilight worriedly.

"Not if she talks to me like that," I answer matter of factly, taking another sip. I mean, she can't make me talk to her if I don't want to.

"One more chance Seth," Twilight warns me in a dangerously calm voice, now standing directly behind me. Again, not my mother. If you're not going to approach me in a dignified and respectful manner, there's no way I'm going to acknowledge you.

Suddenly, I'm pulled backwards, the chair falling over backwards, the edge of it ramming my tailbone painfully. The mug falls out of my hand from the force. "What the fuck?!" I scream as I'm pulled back through the crowd. Looking down at my body, I realize I'm enshrouded by Twilight's magical aura. Rage quickly overtakes me, causing me to curl my hands into fists.

The streets of Ponyville are shrouded in darkness, lit only by the oil lamps hanging from fixed posts that line the edges at regular intervals. So that's the first thing I see as Twilight drags me out the door with her magic.

She sets me down, transfixing me with a stern glare. However, it doesn't look like she'd expected me to return an equally, if not more intense glare. I storm up to her furiously, almost subconsciously raising my fist to strike her.

A hint of fear actually enters her eyes as I draw closer to her, and just before I reach her, she immobilizes me again.

"You better hold me back, bitch. Hide behind your magic, like all you unicorns do," I snarl at her, futilely straining at my magic bonds. I've never been this angry since coming to Equestria. Hell, I haven't been angry enough to strike someone for years. But all I can think about is showing this fucking pony that you can't just take control of my body like this. My body is mine. It should be my choice how I use it!

Twilight, now that she has me under control, goes back to glaring at me. "No, you have no right to be mad; Not after what you did to Pinkie!" she yells at me. So that's what this is about.

"No right? NO RIGHT?!" My throat hurts from just how loudly I shout at her. "I'm sick and tired of you unicorns using your goddamn magic on me when you can't get your way! It's childish and infringes upon my rights as a sentient being!"

"Oh, get over yourself. If you had just listened to me when I called you, I wouldn't have had to use magic at all. You only have yourself to blame," Twilight shoots back, raising her nose slightly. If it was possible for her to piss me off any more, she did it.

"Don't get all self-righteous with me. You're a spoiled brat who gets everything she needs from the fucking royalty. I bet you think you're entitled to my attention whenever you want it!" I rail at her. Judging by the way she freezes and her ears flatten, I think I hit a nerve.

"How dare you?! I'll have you know I had to work for everything I've received! As for you, you don't get to walk around hurting other ponies simply because you're wallowing in self-pity because everyone you know and love is dead!" Twilight shouts, her words cutting right through me.

My struggles cease, every muscle in my body tensing. A sort of calm falls over me, but not a typical one. It's the kind of calm that comes with psychopathic anger. The kind that you could beat someone senseless, and you wouldn't feel a thing. It's a good thing she's got me restrained, because at this point I couldn't even fathom what I'd do to her.

Twilight realizes that she's gone too far when she sees the demonic glint of fury in my eyes. She takes a step back, looking appalled at herself. "Seth...I'm so sorry. I didn't...that was uncalled for."

"But you're right, aren't you? I'm just the worthless remainder of a worthless race," I reply calmly, my voice sounding dead.

"No, Seth, you're not worthless, you're..."

"Don't try to take it back. Whether you meant to say it or not, that's what you really feel." I cut across her bitterly.

"No, that's not it at all! I'm sorry, I wasn't thinking clearly," Twilight backtracks hastily. Pft, the lying bitch. I know what you're thinking.

"Right, I'm sure. Now then, what is it you wanted to talk to me about?"

Twilight looks surprised that I'm even letting her continue. I just don't want this to drag on any longer than it has to. I...need to be alone. "Um...well, you said some really hurtful things to Pinkie, and it's really affected her. I want you to...apologize to her," she explains, much calmer than before.

"Now, isn't that rich. I'm sorry, I'll have to decline. My goal was to keep her from talking to me again. If I apologize, that would be counterproductive, don't you think?" I say in a cool voice. Holy shit, I almost sound like a psychopath.

"It doesn't matter what your goal was. You went too far. At least explain things to her. I want my friend back. Please, Seth!" Twilight's almost begging at this point.

"Come ask me in the morning. Right now, I'm too angry at you to care," I tell her honestly. Twilight nods her head sadly, and then she releases me from her magic. When she sets me down, I honestly still feel the urge to beat the shit out of her for holding me like that in the first place. Instead, I just turn my back to her and walk back towards the bar.

I'm halted when her hooves close around me from behind in what I think is supposed to be a hug. "What are you doing?" I demand, wondering if she might have lost her mind.

"I'm really sorry. I mean it. I can't even begin to understand what you're going through," Twilight murmurs softly. Oh for the...seriously? You were screaming at me earlier, and now you're being all huggy? Give me a break. "I was just angry...and...I'm so sorry."

"What, do you expect me to just drop everything and hug you back? Get off me." I wrench out of her grip. "I'm going back inside. I'll talk to you in the morning."

I leave a distraught looking Twilight behind as I walk into the bar. The moment I walk inside, I notice that Rainbow, Lyra, Bon Bon, and Flitter are back at our table, having seen my involuntary exit from the building earlier.

Rainbow notices that something is wrong the moment she sees me. She meets me halfway, before I can even reach the table. "Hey, Seth, what happened out there?" Rainbow asks, her voice sounding worried. Her concern is exacerbated when I don't respond, pushing past her rudely to return to my chair. "Hey!"

Lyra and Flitter both observe my noticeable change in demeanor and crowd me as well. I shut my eyes, trying hard not to keep my anger in check, even as they repeatedly try to get me to answer them. My hand wraps around the edge of the table, and I attempt to force all of my growing frustration out though that one hand. I end up squeezing the table so hard my hand turns white.

"Would you shut the fuck up already?!" I finally lose it, releasing the table and slamming that hand down on its surface so hard the cups on it tip over. Lyra, Flitter, and Rainbow are shocked into silence by my outburst. "Does it look like I want to deal with any of you right now? Get the fuck out of my face."

"But..." Lyra attempts, but Rainbow stops her, sticking a hoof in her mouth.

"Come on, girls. Let's go get some more drinks," Rainbow suggests, herding the two of them away towards the front counter.

I'm left alone at the table. My hands lethargically move up to my head, supporting it as I stare down at the table. My eyes soon become unfocused as I zone out, once again remembering just who I've lost, thanks to that bitch of a librarian. Self-pity...fuck you. You make it sound so cheap. I bet you've never lost anypony in your life.

For the rest of Vinyl's gig, I isolate myself as much as possible from the other ponies. When Rainbow and the others come back after a while, I get up and leave, walking outside of the bar and sitting down on the cold ground, where I gaze up at the night sky. I take some small manner of comfort from the few things in this world that will never chance. Even three thousand years later, the same stars still shine down on me.

I stay there, the cold wind chilling me, until the music stops, signaling the end of Vinyl's gig. I guess that means I'd better head back inside. At the very least, I'll be alone soon.

Luckily I manage to get inside before the flood of ponies leave the building. Forcing my way through that would not have been fun.

"Hey, I'll see you later, all right?" Lyra calls out to me as she leaves with Bon Bon. I don't give her a reply, and then they're gone a few moments later. Flitter also says goodbye to me before she leaves, but I don't acknowledge her either.

"Sure, but only if you help Seth and I get all this back home," I overhear Vinyl saying to Rainbow just as I arrive within earshot of them. I wonder what they're talking about.

"Aw, come on, do I have to?" Rainbow complains. Yeah, really, why would Rainbow have to help me load? I never needed her help before.

"Yeah. This way he'll be less..." Vinyl starts to answer, but then she cuts off abruptly when she sees me coming. I cock an eyebrow at her. I'll be less...what? "...less burdened. Yeah, less burdened."

"You hear that, Seth? I'm helping you load up this time around. Aren't you lucky?" Rainbow brags to me. Her face falls when I completely ignore her, instead choosing to begin dismantling the LEDs like Vinyl had taught me.

"Right, bro, you keep doing that. Dash, help me with these tables," Vinyl orders. I think I'll cut out the description of this part, since it's essentially the same as the last time I packed up, only I know a little bit more about what I'm doing.

"Awright, here's your money, bro." Vinyl holds out five bits on her hoof once we're done packing up. I look at them, running a bit of math in my hand. Instead of taking them, I fish out another bit and add it to the pile on her hoof. "What the..."

"Keep it. That's my rent for today," I grunt, withdrawing my hand and stashing it in my pocket. Vinyl looks at the money for a long moment, and then she sighs and puts it into a sack. This leaves me with five bits. I've got a nice surplus this time, so I might be able to spend some of it for myself if I factor in tomorrow's pay from the farm.

"Come on, let's get this thing moving!" Rainbow yells impatiently. For some reason, she's hovering above the cart, her wings flapping rapidly. I still have no idea why she's helping us anyway. What, is Vinyl not satisfied by my work?

"Good idea," Vinyl agrees, and we assume the usual formation for moving the cart, only this time Rainbow is helping me push. This way is easier on my tired muscles, but I honestly didn't need her help.

We proceed in silence through the nearly abandoned streets of Ponyville. While I'd like to say they respected my mood and kept their mouths shut, Rainbow immediately starts talking to Vinyl about the songs she'd played back in the bar. I never really paid much attention to them, so even if I wanted to join in, which I don't, I'd have had nothing to say,

A few moments later, we've arrived at Vinyl's place. She opens the door with magic and guides the cart inside with our help.

The second it is inside and stable, I let go and head for the kitchen. As cluttered as it is, I'm sure it should be too hard to find a cup. Apple cider is nice and all, but I need some actual water, or I will get circulation issues. Mostly in my hands too. I had that problem in college a lot, whenever I'd stay up playing games, I'd forget to drink, so my hands would practically freeze solid.

Conversation trickles in from the front room as I yank open various cupboards, finding plates and silverware (who the hell keeps silverware in a cupboard and not a drawer? And why does she have some anyway, if she doesn't use them?) , and finally, in the absolute last place I look, the cups I'm looking for.

I fill the cup with water from the sink and drain it dry. It doesn't taste that great, but I'm not altogether that picky. I repeat this several more times until my stomach feels full, even though it's not.

Striding back into the living room reveals Vinyl and Rainbow chilling on the couch, still talking. Unsurprisingly, Rainbow somehow managed to turn the conversation to herself and her latest aerial tricks. Me, being the nice guy I am, interrupt them. "Why are you still here?"

"What, me?" Rainbow asks, clueless. I give her a deadpan stare.

"No, the mouse on your shoulder," is my sarcastic response. Rainbow reacts to that by falling off the couch with a yelp, trying to get rid of the nonexistent mouse. Vinyl laughs at the pegasus's stupidity, while I'm facepalming. All of these ponies take my sarcasm way too seriously.

"Hey, there's no mouse!" Rainbow realizes at last, and she gets up and looks at me accusingly.

"Of course not! I was talking to you."

"Then why did you say you weren't?"

"I'm sorry, I didn't realize I was talking to an imbecile," I apologize sardonically. Rainbow nips at me, not appreciating the insult. "Now answer me."

"What? Oh, yeah. So I'm crashing here tonight," she finally says. I blink. She's what? Rainbow is looking at me hesitantly, almost as if she's afraid that I'd snap at her about it. To be fair, I think about it. If this isn't a clear excuse to stay near me, I don't know what is. I wish she'd stop trying. I'm not friend material, and I'm not sure you are either.

"Whatever. I don't care. I'm going to bed," I grunt, turning my back. Without waiting to see how they react to my sudden departure, I ascend the stairs and tread into my room, slamming the door.

I'm alone at last. From now until the morning, I have some blessed solitude at last. I'd say today hadn't been that bad, but Twilight ruined any chance of it being even a mediocre day. I still feel no inclination to apologize to that pink menace, though.

Goddammit, Twilight. I'd been trying not to think about the people I've lost.. I can't feel grief if I keep them out of my mind. But Twilight ruined that.

Now, as I sit down on my bed, all I can think about are those people. And it fucking hurts. It's like that feeling you get when you're waiting for a friend to show up after agreeing to hang out, only they never show up, and you're left waiting. Waiting for the friend that you will never see again.

I think about all the times we might yet have shared, if life had continued as normal. Amaryllis and I...I wanted to show her so much. I had a piano at my parents' house. A lot of my childhood was spent playing on that thing, learning melodies by ear, and cross referencing sounds to notes so I could learn to read music. I wanted to play for her one day. One day when I could do so without feeling like I'd be judged for it.

Or my brother, Adam. It's funny, but right now I really want to watch Eureka Seven with him, even though I know it's impossible now. We'd had so many more animes on our list. I had been looking forward to watching things like Stein's Gate, Spice and Wolf, Summer Wars, and other obscure titles. Hell, we were even considering watching that newer anime, Attack on Titan, to see if it was worth anything. I sort of just took him for granted. Heh, how fucking dumb could I get?

It doesn't matter how stupid it is. My hand slips into my pocket and pulls out my phone, powering it on. The light washes over my face as that little apple pops up.

Looks like I have about fifty five percent battery left. Not bad, it's only been a few days and I've only lost five percent. At this rate, it should last about half a year more. Well, probably a bit less after I spend some time perusing it.

A melancholy smile crosses my face as I pull up my image folder. I think it's about time I look through these.

A few moments later, I realize how bad of an idea this was. With every image I look at, I feel worse. The more memories I remember, the more I want to go back home. The more times I see Amaryllis, the more I wish she was here, so could hold her close and never let her go.

One last image in particular catches my eye. It's the group picture we took during our trip Europe, a year or so ago, during the summer. I forget when. It had been my family and I, as well as Amaryllis and her family.

In this shot, we were standing on the cruise ship with our backs to the ocean. Amaryllis and I were in the front, wearing sleeveless shirts and swim trunks, with our arms around the shoulder of the other. Adam stood next to me, wearing a white shirt with Maka and Soul on it, from Soul Eater, with a bright grin on his face. My mother and father are behind Adam and I, where they were standing next to Amaryllis's parents. We all looked so happy. It was one of those times when nothing else mattered but the ones you were with.

Tears roll slowly and silently down my face. These are the things that I'll never get to enjoy ever again. Scrolling to the next image, I chuckle despite my sorrow, as it's that same group image, only it had been during the second shot, when a dolphin had chosen to leap out of the water at that exact spot, splashing us all and causing some hilarious expressions.

Dammit...I wish...I wish there could be someone here. Someone that I can shoulder my sorrows onto. Why must everyone I meet be useless and untrustworthy? Why can't there be someone here for me?

Just as I'm powering the phone off once more, the door to my room opens, taking me by surprise. "Hey, Seth, sorry to bug you, but I was wondering...whoa." Shit it's Rainbow. What the fuck...can't I even have time to myself, away from you goddamn ponies?! She cuts off the moment she sees my face. I then realize that my phone is still giving off some light, which is shining onto my face. That's what she's looking at. Double shit. Now she's walking towards me. Triple shit.

"Get the fuck out of my room," I growl at her.

"With you looking like that? No way," Rainbow tells me firmly. I give her a disbelieving look, which slowly turns to anger.

"Can't you ponies respect even the most basic of privacies?!" I demand incredulously. Is there no depths to which this race won't sink?

"Buck privacy, especially if you're hurting like this when no one can see you," Rainbow asserts, getting within arms reach of me. I take advantage of that and swing at her in my despair. She ducks under it easily, and doesn't even back off.

"Fuck off! Get out of my room before I make you!" Now I'm threatening her, my hand reaching towards my rifle. Rainbow gives me this little smirk.

"Didn't you hear me? I'm not moving. And do you really think you can make me?" Rainbow stays where she is, infuriating me further. But...I leave my rifle where it is. She has a point. The last time I tried to tangle with her, she was practically toying with me the whole time. Fuck, so what the hell do I do to get her to go away?

"What do you even want?" If I give her what she wants, maybe she'll fuck off. Still, I don't see what she hopes to gain from bugging me like this.

"You to tell me what happened between you and Twilight that got you this upset," Rainbow answers, sitting down on her haunches and folding her wings. Really? That's what she wants? What a hassle. "I mean, we were joking and having a fun a few minutes before that, so something happened."

"You're too damn nosy. Some things I want to keep to myself. Can't you fucking respect that?" I demand. I'm starting to feel exhausted, so I place my rifle by my bed and lay back, resting my back against the pillows.

"Not if this is what I find. As Twilight would say, I'm making an intervention," Rainbow replies stubbornly. "I'm not moving until you tell me."

"What...I...feel like we've been here before. Have we been here before?" I remark, the irony of the situation not lost on me. I feel like we just did this...several hours ago.

"You know, you're right." Rainbow actually chuckles at that. "I guess you need someone as stubborn as you to get you to say anything."

"I can't believe we're doing this again. What's stopping me from just going to sleep and ignoring you?"

"Well you could, but only if you don't mind if I crash in here as well." When she says this, Rainbow curls up on the floor and looks up at me smugly.

"Of course I mind! That's not proper at all!" I exclaim, appalled. There's no way I'm going to let a damn female pony sleep in my room. That's nine kinds of wrong.

"Now you sound like Rarity," Rainbow remarks, and then she straightens herself up, holding herself like she's attempting to be regal. Then, in a passable imitation of Rarity, she says, "Oh pish posh, darling. A mare sleeping in the same room with a stallion? Why, imagine the scandal!"

"Snrk." I can't help it. That's just funny, especially because I could totally see Rarity saying something like that. And it's even better because it's coming from Rainbow, who is practically the exact opposite of Rarity.

"Right, so if you don't want that to happen, you better start talking," Rainbow declares, slumping back down and giving a very unladylike yawn. I remain silent for a while, still unwilling to talk, but also wondering how I would even word it.

Several minutes of silence pass in this manner. At first Rainbow continues to stare at me attentively, but after the first few seconds she starts to fidget. Then she rolls over and starts trying to scratch an itch on her back. God, she's like a damn puppy on a leash. How much effort is she putting into this? I mean, she's not really the patient type.

"Hey," I say, once I think I've collected my thoughts enough. I'm tough enough that I don't need to explain my problems. I'll tell her enough to get her to go the fuck away. My words cause her to stop hoofing at the carpet aimlessly and look at up me expectantly. "Have...you ever lost anypony?"

"Me? Well, if you count all the times I lost Fluttershy in a crowd, then..."

"Don't be a dumb fuck. I mean have you had anypony you cared about die?" I cut across her, not in the mood for pony naivete. Rainbow shuts up immediately, gulping.

"I...well...no."

"That's what I thought. God, I'm envious. Let me explain this to you in a way you'll understand." I can't believe I'm going to say this, but I need her to know this, otherwise she'll never understand. Pah, she'll never understand anyway. She'll decide I'm too much drama and walk away, preferring to live her own ignorant life, because ignorance is bliss. "You're friends with Vinyl, aren't you?"

"Heck yeah. She's only one of the coolest unicorns around," Rainbow replies, confused as to where I'm going with this.

"Now imagine that tomorrow morning, she walked out that door and never came back. And you didn't even get a chance to say goodbye." Rainbow's eyes widen at that.

"Gosh, that would totally stink."

"Right? Now imagine that when you walk out after her, the entire town is empty. Twilight, Fluttershy, Rarity, Applejack, Pinkie, and even every single last townspony are just gone. Forever. Imagine that just a moment ago, everything had been fine. How would that make you feel!?" My voice rises throughout this entire explanation. The last sentence is spoken in a yell, which causes Rainbow's ears to flatten.

"That's...what Twilight made you feel?" Rainbow spoke haltingly, pain filling her eyes after envisioning that scenario.

"Twilight reminded me of it. She actually wanted me to apologize to Pinkie for telling her to fuck off the other day, but she...lacked a certain tact," I correct her. And I went and told her how I felt anyway. Wow...I am such a fucking weakling. Amaryllis would be laughing her ass off at me if she could see me right now. Oh, the tough and silent Seth, spilling his guts to a multicolored pony with wings? What a joke.

"Heh, yeah, that's our egghead for you." Rainbow agrees with me, surprisingly enough. What the hell? She's just going to take my word without even hearing Twilight's? "I'll talk to her about it. She's not the best at dealing with other ponies...or a very depressed human."

"Don't bother. She knows she fucked up. I just don't plan on forgiving her anytime soon," I grunt, crossing my arms.

"Aw, come on. She didn't mean to hurt you. She just stuck her hoof in her mouth. Again," Rainbow protests. "She was probably just angry about that whole thing with Pinkie that she forgot to think."

"Whatever." We fall into silence again, but this time it looks like Rainbow is thinking hard about something.

"Say...why don't we get her back?" Rainbow's words cause me to look at her sharply. She's wearing a mischievous grin. What the fuck...did she just ask me if I wanted to get revenge on one of her friends? What kind of pony _is_ she?

"What?"

"Yeah! We'll show her a thing or two about messing with your head. Know any good pranks?" Rainbow affirms. My expression becomes dumbfounded.

"You want me to get back at her by...pranking her? Are you serious right now?" This sounds so fucking dumb I don't even know where to start.

"Come on, it'll be fun! I guarantee you, she'll never see it coming," Rainbow assures me, sidling closer and hopping up on the bed across from me.

"Really? How childish do you have to be? Pranking her won't make me forget what she said," I demand scornfully. Rainbow looks at me cluelessly for a bit. Oh shit, right. How do you...oh. "Right...foalish. Still getting used to pony terminology."

"Oh. Well, maybe not, but it'll be funny as heck. Twilight has the _best_ reactions. Trust me, I know from experience," Rainbow replies.

"Ugh...this is so dumb," I groan, planting my face in both of my hands. Double facepalm for this one.

"No, it'll be great. So are you in?" Rainbow looks entirely too eager for this. Staring at her, I mull the idea over in my head. To be honest, I've never actually pranked anyone before, nor did I ever feel the need to.

"Eh, fuck it, why not? What's the worst that could happen?" I relent, making a dismissive hand gesture. "So what kind of prank were you thinking about?"

"Well, I was asking you. When do you next see her?" Rainbow points out.

"She's coming here tomorrow morning, to remind me about Pinkie."

"Oh really? In that case, I'd do something hilarious, like rig the door to dump a bucket of water on her head when she walks in," Rainbow suggests, snickering wickedly. I give her a flat-browed expression.

"Are you kidding me? No, that's dumb. If we're going to do this, we should probably take into account her nature," I argue. Seriously, dumping water on people is like something you'd see in a cartoon. I'd want something more hardcore than that. "I don't much about her except that she's a nerd who can be a real bitch."

"Twi? Well...she's really into books, and she gets crazy if somepony messes up all that organization she's got going on," Rainbow describes. Oh, well that just makes things too easy for me. I now know exactly what to do to her. "What's that look for? You got an idea?"

"Yeah, come here" I order. Rainbow clambers over the blankets towards me. Part of me shifts uncomfortably at her increased proximity.

With that, the two of us put together our plan for my revenge on Twilight. I'm still convinced that this is just one giant waste of time, but honestly I'm at the point where I literally don't care about anything. How I haven't lost my mind by now, I don't know.

"That's genius! We'll need Vinyl's help to keep her from using her magic, through," Rainbow exclaims.

"Is that a problem?" I question.

"Nah, Vinyl will totally help us. She should still be awake," Rainbow assures me. "Come on, let's go talk to her!"

Wordlessly, I rise from the bed and stalk out of the room, Rainbow right on my heels. I don't know how tomorrow is going to go, but one thing is for sure.

Twilight is going to be in for one hell of a surprise in the morning.

* * *

All is quiet in Vinyl's living room as the first rays of the morning light shine in through the windows, illuminating the two ponies and I as we lie in wait for our unwitting target.

I'm standing with Rainbow in plain view of the front door, next to a bookshelf that Vinyl had lugged down from the attic for us. Its shelves were stocked with hundreds of books on musical subjects, like musical history and theory. There's also a lot of score sheets there too.

Clutched in Rainbow's right forehoof is a hardcover book emblazoned with the image of Celestia and Luna on it. It's titled, "Equestria's Lost History."

My hands are tucked into my pockets. My right hand toys with the small object in my right pocket, my entire body tense with anticipation. My mind has entered the "fuck-it" mode, so it doesn't matter how stupid this is.

There is a small rug inconspicuously placed just in front of Rainbow and I, so that Twilight would have to cross it to reach us.

"Any sign of her?" Rainbow whispers anxiously. Vinyl moves aside the drapes on her sidelights and peers outside.

"Not just yet. Hang tight just a bit longer," Vinyl replies just as softly. Rainbow huffs in reply and shifts her weight between her two back legs. I chuckle a bit. She's getting fidgety again. This pony really needs to learn some patience. Waiting to prank someone always requires some patience. "Hold it...there she is. Get ready!"

"Aw yeah, let's do this," Rainbow says eagerly, her pep returning. "You remember the script, Seth?"

"Of course I do. I wrote it, dipshit," I retort. My not so polite response causes Rainbow to stick her tongue out at me.

The sound of Twilight knocking on the door causes us to abandon our sneaky expressions and replace them with casual ones. The moment Vinyl opens it to reveal the very hesitant looking Twilight, we start off into our prepared dialogue, speaking in tones loud enough that Twilight can easily hear us.

"We should probably do this now, before Twilight gets here," I remark casually, nodding my head at the book on Rainbow's hoof.

"Yeah, she would totally freak. Hurry up, she'll be here any minute!" Rainbow urges me, pushing the book towards me. Out of the corner of my eye I see Twilight peek her head around Vinyl, watching us with curiosity and suspicion. Her eyes widen when she sees the title of the book Rainbow's holding.

"All right. Good bye, shitty book. May your author never produce another," I declare dramatically, pulling the object out of my right pocket, revealing it to be a box of matches. The sound Twilight makes, which is a cross between a agonized whinny and a high pitched squeal, is almost enough to make me lose my composure right then and there.

"What do you think you're doing?!" Twilight shrieks, her horn lighting up, probably attempting to grab the book from us. However, to her dismay, it doesn't work at all. What she had failed to notice is the faint magical aura that already surrounds the book, courtesy of a snickering Vinyl.

"Quick, she's here! Burn it!" Rainbow exclaims. I light the match with a quick flick of my wrist, springing a small flame into existence.

Twilight, out of any other options, breaks into a dead run towards us. "Stoooooop!" she cries desperately. I bring the match close to the spine of the book, spurring Twilight into greater speeds.

However, her reckless charge causes her to step on the small rug...that slides backwards under her momentum, courtesy of the large amount of grease spread on the floor beneath it. "Waaaah!" Twilight cries as she overbalances.

Vinyl acts quickly, using her magic to slide a pie right under Twilight, so that she falls muzzle first into it. There's silence for a few moments, and then Twilight makes a hilarious muffled sound of confusion.

We just fucking lose it. Rainbow and Vinyl laugh uproariously at the sight of the fallen Twilight. I blow out the match, and then I join them, finding this the most hilarious thing since I got here. This isn't just a chuckle, either. I'm laughing my ass off right now, holding my ribs because it's getting hard to breathe.

Twilight picks her head out of the pie, which looks to be cherry, if the red filling is anything to go by. For some reason, a certain song starts playing in my head...which makes this even funnier.

"Rainbow! Is this another one of your pranks?!" Twilight demands, glaring angrily at her. Rainbow just laughs harder, because Twilight looks anything but intimidating with all that cherry filling on her face. She glares at Vinyl next. "Vinyl! Were you in on this too?"

"You know it!" Vinyl chokes out between laughs. "Oh...your face...stop looking at me...I'm gonna die!"

Twilight gives an adorable little growl, and then she reaches up a hoof to her face in an attempt to wipe off some of the pie filling. Unfortunately for her, it's the sticky kind. "Oh, yuck! You couldn't have used something easier to clean up?!"

"Nope!" I answer her helpfully. A few moments later, I manage to compose myself, and then I take the book from where Rainbow had put it. Walking towards her, I earn her gaze, and I fully expect her to scold me next.

That doesn't happen. When Twilight's cherry covered face stares up at me (which causes me to grin and almost go into another laughing fit), she releases a resigned sigh. "You weren't really going to burn that book,were you?" she asks in a defeated tone.

"Yeah, I was, actually. I still might. Take a look at it," I tell her seriously. Her eyes widen and she snatches the book from me with her magic. Vinyl, Rainbow, and I watch her with baited breath as she runs a hoof over the cover of the book.

It's only when she tries to open it that she realizes it isn't actually a book, instead being a sanded wood construct that we'd spent hours last night making. Her resulting cry of realization and anguish causes us to start cracking up again.

"Vinyl, mind if I use your kitchen?" Twilight asks, thoroughly unamused. After receiving a nod from the still snickering Vinyl, Twilight leaves the room with a, "I'll be right back."

"I told you, right? The _best_ reactions!" Rainbow reminds me, managing to calm herself, but still wearing a satisfied smirk.

"Okay, I have to admit. As foalish as that was, her face was fucking priceless!" I chuckle, rubbing my eyes to wipe away the moisture formed there by all this merriment. I notice Rainbow and Vinyl exchange a smile and a nod at that. Huh, wonder what that's all about.

"Totally worth the effort," Vinyl adds, walking towards Rainbow and I. She sticks out a hoof towards us. "Put it there!"

Rainbow looks at me, noting my crossed arms. She jerks her head towards Vinyl. What, so she wants me to high five a pony? How is that even a thing? They don't even have fingers, which is where that phrase originated from. You know, five fingers? So what the fuck? Do they call it a high one?

But if I do it...they're just going to think they're my friends. Rainbow already thinks that, and won't go away no matter what I do. If I do this...Vinyl is also going to be annoying. Fuck it, I'm in a better mood because of that prank, so I'll humor them. If they get too annoying, I'll let them know clearly where they stand.

I reach my hand up, and then Rainbow and Vinyl both beam, and reciprocate the gesture, our assorted limbs meeting in midair with a _clop_.

Just then, a freshly cleaned Twilight walks out of the kitchen, still dripping slightly from her mane. Her unamused expression causes us to snicker a bit. Twilight looks at me expectantly. "Are you ready to go see Pinkie?"

"You're just going to assume I'm going?" I demand, irritated already. I expected a carefully worded question, not this. Sounds like she decided that I'm going for me. Twilight dithers a bit, taken off guard by my hostility.

"But...you said..."

"I _said_, come talk to me about it in the morning," I correct her before she can even form a coherent sentence. "Never once did I say, 'Oh yes, Twilight, I will most definitely see Ms. Look-at-Me-I'm-High-Out-of-My-Mind!'"

"Seth, she hasn't come out of her room in days!" she beseeches me.

"And I should care about that, why?" My cold response causes everypony in the room to glance at me in shock. "The world is harsh. The sooner she gets used to that, the better off she'll be."

"Okay, everypony stop and chill out a moment," Rainbow interjects just as Twilight's opening her mouth. "Twilight, what do you want from Seth, exactly?"

"All I want is for him to apologize to Pinkie, so she'll be back to her usual self. It doesn't have to be anything elaborate," Twilight expresses, looking at me with those pleading eyes.

"Okay. Seth, why exactly won't you do it?" Rainbow turns to me next. I raise an eyebrow at her. Is the egotistical jock trying to play mediator? You know, come to think about it, for a pony with such an active lifestyle, she's been strangely intelligent and reasonable. Something doesn't seem right here.

"Because I said what I did to Pinkie to keep her the hell away from me, and to stop assuming that she's my friend. As far as I'm concerned, mission accomplished," I tell them flatly. "You ponies all have the habit of assuming that you're my friends. It'll only hurt you in the long run."

"You know, you say that, but I'm not going anywhere," Rainbow points out. I shoot her a glance. Yeah, I had a feeling she would say something like that. But maybe the others will take the...

"Neither am I. I am always willing to be a friend to you, whether or not you want it," Twilight adds. I stare at her in shock. What the hell is she talking about?

"You can't get rid of me that easily, bro." What the fuck? Even Vinyl is in on this bullshit? Who do you all think you're fooling? Nobody cares this much about making a friend. Are you all working together behind my back or something? Do you think I'll let you in if you present a united front?

"You're all crazy. I don't owe you anything," I declare, crossing my arms stubbornly. The three of them huff at that.

"Let me put it this way," Rainbow says, whizzing in front of me. "Twilight's going to keep annoying you until you do what she wants. Trust me, we've all been there."

"Hey!" Twilight protests.

"Tell me I'm wrong, Twi," Rainbow says with a smirk. Twilight pauses, and then dips her head shyly. "Hah! So Seth, how much are you willing to take?"

"Oh for the love of...fine!" I relent with bad grace. All these ponies ganging up on me with their friendship speeches and their bullshit logic, and their multicolored manes, and their shitty magical powers and...fucking...I hate ponies. They weaponize their damn cuteness. It just makes me even more irritated when I see them exchange happy smiles at my answer. Don't rub it in...it just pisses me off. "If I'm gonna do this, let's go now. I do still have work to go to."

"Perfect! Shall we go then?" Twilight asks me innocently, stepping aside so that I can reach the door. I push past her and walk out into the sunlight.

Let's go and get this over with.

* * *

This one took me forever, and I'm still not all that comfortable with it. Oh well, I'll go back and fix the whole story once I get the rough draft down. After all, that's essentially what this is.

I also decided that adding a Rainbow Dash tag was warranted, considering how much I'm writing about her in comparison to the other five. Anyway, this arc is almost finished, with three chapters left, at the very most. It'll end with a bang, so stay tuned!

Credit to DarkWarfang for helping with the prank idea, along with other smaller changes, as well as just being a general badass.


	16. No Right to Control

This is really awkward. Like, really awkward. It's difficult to explain, but I feel...like a criminal somehow, the way Twilight and Rainbow are flanking me on either side as I walk through the streets. I don't feel like I should have to say anything to this Pinkie chick, because I meant everything I said. Isn't apologizing the same thing as admitting you were wrong?

So we're back at Sugarcube Corner now. I slow to a stop just in front of the door, looking up at the absurdly decorated building. The last time I was here, it was for that awesome party. Now I'm back here to attempt to cheer up a maniac. I almost consider leaving, because fuck these ponies, but I know that I'd never get away. Between Twilight's magic and Rainbow's athletic prowess, I won't even have a chance to get free. The thought that they can control my life so easily almost makes anger bubble up within me.

Without a word, I pull open the door and step inside, my nose twitching at the sudden onslaught of sugary smells. This immediately gives me a craving for something sweet, but I don't have any money. I spent the last of it last night.

"Good morning, and welcome to Su...to..." I recognize the speaker as being Mrs. Cake. However, her bubbly words quickly trail off as she sees me, and her welcoming expression turns to one of animosity, more than likely directed at me. "Hmph."

"Twilight, Pinkie's upstairs, right?" I whisper to the unicorn behind me. She confirms that with a nod, so I stride forward, intending to completely ignore Mrs. Cake so I can get this over with. However, she steps in front of me.

"Where do you think you're going, human?" she demands, her posture hostile. Ah, so they know about it too. I don't see what the big deal is, though. Why do they care so much? Is it because they can't get any work from Pinkie if she's all depressed?

"Past you. Get the fuck out of my way," I respond plainly. Mrs. Cake does not budge. Dammit, fine, I'll try this Twilight's way. "Look, I'm here to talk to Pinkie."

"Don't you think you've done enough?" she snaps back at me. Well, so much for that. I turn around and walk back towards Twilight.

"Well, I tried. I'm leaving now," I tell her. Both she and Rainbow immediately step in front of the door. "What? How am I supposed to do anything with this fucker in my way?"

"Seth, she's just angry because Pinkie is like a daughter to her. If you can keep that in mind when you talk to her, I'm sure you two can come to an understanding," Twilight explains to me patiently.

"I don't care about any of that. I'm here to talk to Pinkie, drag her out of her room, and then go," I grunt, earning a disapproving look from the unicorn. "Just magic her out of my way or something."

"I'm not going to use magic on Mrs. Cake. She's not doing anything wrong," Twilight argues. "Just go up to her and show some sincerity, and I'm sure she'll let you pass."

"Sincerity implies that I care. I'm here to get you off my case, that's all." My words cause her frown to deepen. "Fine...but know that everything I say to her will practically be a lie."

Mrs. Cake hasn't budged from her position, and she glares at me as I walk back to her. "Look, I need to get past you," I tell her bluntly.

"That's not going to happen. Pinkie's in bad shape thanks to what you did," she avows, scoffing.

"Yeah, and clearly nothing you've said to her is helping her any, considering she's still in her room," I point out, and the flinch I get tells me my words are getting to her. "She's depressed because of something I said, and nothing anypony else says will change that fact in her mind."

"You're not helping your case," Mrs. Cake informs me. That's because I haven't finished talking yet, bitch.

"So if I were to take back everything I said, she'd have no reason to be sad. So how about you move now, and let me give you your friend back?" Despite what I said to Twilight, nothing I've said has been a lie.

"How can I be sure you won't just make it worse?" Mrs. Cake asks in an accusatory manner. Oh good, she's decided that now's a good time to distrust me. While smart, it's really just getting in my way now.

"Look I get that you're trying to protect her or whatever. But you're stopping me from apologizing to her. What kind of friend are you?" I demand. Mrs. Cake looks like I'd struck her. She seems like she's going to argue, but she thinks better of it, instead choosing to at last step aside and allow me access to the staircase at the back of shop.

"All right. She's upstairs, just behind the counter," Mrs. Cake says with a sigh. Finally. Now I can actually do what I came to do.

The three of us walk up the stairs at the back of the shop, where the bedrooms are located. Once we're up there, Twilight leads me to a particular room, which I assume is Pinkie's. "This is it. Give it your best shot." Twilight encourages me with a smile. Whatever.

I grab the door handle and pull, but it doesn't budge. Raising an eyebrow, I try pushing, but that doesn't work either. So it's locked. I give Twilight a meaningful look. She sighs and walks towards the door. "Pinkie, are you in there? Can you let us in?" she calls softly. Silence is her only response. That can't be good.

"Come on Pinks, open up!" Rainbow tries as well. This time we get a response.

"Go away! I don't want to annoy anypony any more than I already have," Pinkie's high pitched voice filters through the door. I can't help but groan and facepalm. What the hell...is she a child having a damn tantrum?

"Pinkie, nopony thinks you're annoying," Twilight attempts to reassure her friend, but once again silence greets her. Okay, no. This is just a waste of my time at this point.

"Okay, I've lost my patience," I growl, loud enough for Pinkie to hear me inside, judging by the gasp I hear. "I'm coming in, whether she likes it or not."

"Seth? What are you going to...no, wait!" Twilight protests as I stalk past her. Once I'm standing in front of Pinkie's door, I take quick moment to examine it. Perfect, it doesn't look that sturdy.

Twilight and Rainbow look at me in shock as I lift up my foot and kick the door hard just above the handle, breaking the flimsy lock. The door slams open inwards, hitting the wall and shaking violently.

I walk inside, getting a look at Pinkie's room as I do so. Strangely enough, it's circular, and rather large. There's even a damn fireplace in here. I guess she's a lot better off than I expected, considering...what, she works at a bakery? I don't think their salaries are that high.

Pinkie herself is lying on the bed opposite the room from me, and she looks somewhat different than I remember. Her mane is totally straight, for one, rather than that frizzy explosion it used to be. Maybe I'm seeing things, but her coat appears to be a darker shade of pink than I remember as well.

"Okay, enough of the pity party. Get up and talk to me," I order her callously. Pinkie stirs slightly, lifting her head and looking at me with sadness in her eyes. Damn, she looks pitiful. I feel a little guilty for causing her to be in this state. I was just trying to get her to leave me alone, not actually believe every word I said to her.

"Seth? What are you doing here?" Pinkie asks weakly, resting her head on the edge of the bed, sort of like a cat does. Before I answer, a thought strikes me. I turn back towards the door, and sure enough, Twilight and Rainbow are trying to get in.

"One second," I tell her. Then I grab the door and slam it shut in their faces. "You brought me here to do a job, now fuck off so I can do it!"

There, now I can have this conversation without them peering over my shoulder. "Now, the better question is, why are you still here, and not having fun with your friends?" I demand.

"Are they really my friends? How do I know they're not just tolerating me? You...you were right. You're not the first one to say I'm annoying," Pinkie laments, causing me to groan and rub my forehead. This is going to be harder than I thought.

"Don't be a dumb fuck. Yeah, they totally tolerate you. That's why they chased me down and brought me here to talk to you," I respond sarcastically. Pinkie flinches at my rough words, and then opens her mouth. "Idiot! Of course they care about you!"

"But...how can they care about an annoying pony like me?" Pinkie asks me pitifully. Oh for the love of god. Time to rip this problem out by the roots.

"Look. This isn't about them. It's about you and me. I said the things I did because they are true. _To me_. You just can't approach me in that manner, and not have me get annoyed," I explain to her carefully. Pinkie looks at me in confusion. So I didn't quite explain that well enough. "Every time we run into one another, you knock me over. I can't help but get a little pissed off."

"I know, and I'm sorry. I just wanted to help you have fun. I've never seen you smile; I mean really really smile, not that little fake smile you sometimes put on," Pinkie responds. Her words...are actually somewhat touching, despite how stupid they sound. Who the hell thinks knocking someone over is a good way to help them have fun? But...she's perceptive enough to tell that almost every smile I put on is fake. And she wants to change that.

"That I don't understand. Why would you do that? What do you get out of seeing me smile?" I question honestly. I get tired of standing, so I move over to the bed and sit down next to her. Pinkie shifts to give me room.

"Because seeing anyone sad is enough to make me sad, and you always look sad, so I'm sad when I see you sad," Pinkie begins, and her wording is enough to make me pause a moment and try to make sense of it. "But if I make you smile, then I can smile, and everyone's happy."

"Wait, so you're telling me that the happiness of others is your happiness?" I ask, putting her reasoning into my own words to make sure I understood.

"Uh-huh," Pinkie confirms. I look at the ground, processing that. That sounds like total bullshit. When people said that to me back in my time, it's always bullshit. Everybody always wants something. People trying to make me "happy" were usually just sucking up to me so I'd help them in class, or to get me to buy stuff for them to reciprocate their "kindness." I always saw it coming, and I would never help them.

"Heh. You ponies never make sense," I comment wryly. "Anyway, I think it's time you got out of this room."

"But..." Pinkie starts, but she cuts off with a yelp when I grab her by the mane and drag her off the bed forcefully. She flails around and falls over, but she manages to scramble upright.

"No excuses. You get out there, and go make your friends smile. That's what you're good at, right?" I command her. Pinkie looks at me thoughtfully, and then she walks up to me, gets up on her hind legs, and wraps her front hooves around my chest in a hug. I nearly unbalance from. And here's yet another random pony hug. I really wish they'd stop doing this.

"Thank you. I know you still find me annoying, but I still want to be your bestest friend," Pinkie whispers to me. I raise an eyebrow at that.

"I don't really want friends...but telling you that isn't really going to stop you, huh," I remark. Pinkie lets go and steadies herself, and then she gives me a nod, a small smile gracing her face. "I thought as much. Now, I need to get going, so I'm leaving now."

Pinkie and I are walking towards the door when a sudden thought strikes me. I look at Pinkie, debating inwardly about whether or not I should actually say it. On one hand, it would make her super happy, but on the other, it would probably annoy the hell out of me. I shouldn't say it. It'll give her the wrong idea. But...she's still looking a little sad, which was my fault in the first place.

Ugh, I might as well. I hope I don't regret this. "Pinkie, if you still want to, I wouldn't be opposed to that welcome party you mentioned." I suggest hesitantly. The change in Pinkie's demeanor is immediate. She turns her head and looks at me with reserved excitement, almost as if she's having trouble believing her ears.

"R-r-really?!" Pinkie squeaks. Placing my hands in my pockets, I nod once. Suddenly, color returns to her coat and her straight and flat mane suddenly puffs up and frizzes out, returning to the way it was when I first met her. "WOOHOO! This is going to be the best. Party. EVER!"

I watch with a raised eyebrow as Pinkie dashes through the door, nearly bowling over Rainbow and Twilight, who had been, as I expected, leaning up against the door with their ears pressed to it. "Oh, hi girls!" Pinkie squeals happily, hugging the both of them tightly, and then she dashes away. "No time to talk, I have a party to plan!"

"Wait, Pinkie!" Twilight calls after her, but Pinkie is long gone. Her gazes turns to me as I leave the room as well.

"Nothing about that pony makes any kind of sense," I remark, shaking my head. Twilight smiles at me, and she steps forward and nuzzles me gently.

"Thank you, Seth. You didn't have to do anything after convincing her to leave," she expresses gratefully. My response is a grunt.

"Whatever. I didn't do it for you."

"Wasn't that more like a pep talk than an apology?" Rainbow inquires with a wry expression. "I mean, I never heard you say the word 'sorry' even once."

"Who cares? It worked, and that's all that really matters," I snap dismissively. Rainbow stares at me, and then she shrugs. "Anyhow, I need to leave. Applejack is expecting me."

"That's right, you have work to do. Wouldn't want you to go off schedule," Twilight recalls, chuckling nervously.

Now that that's out of the way, I can actually get on with my life. Or, what's left of it anyway. Back to working on that damn farm. Oh right...I promised Apple Bloom I'd play with her today. Now what did I go and do that for? I could have just said no, and opted to spend the evening alone for the first time since I got here, but no, I had to fall for that filly's cute expression...ugh.

We walk down the stairs and back through the kitchen, where Pinkie is rummaging through a closet excitedly. Mrs. Cake sees me walk past her, and our eyes meet. She still watches me guardedly, but I do see her give me a small smile and a nod. Huh, after being such a bitch, now she's recognizing my effort? Huh. She's practically admitting she was wrong to block me in the first place. Any human would have been too proud to do that. Okay, she can have a little of my respect.

Just before we leave the building, a clanging noise erupts from the kitchen, followed by a squeal. "Bake ALL the cupcakes!" Pinkie exclaims happily. Well, she's back to being happy and annoying. I suppose it's better than depressed and annoying.

When we walk outside, Twilight takes her leave from us, saying something about work back at the library. Whatever. At least she's gone now.

"Race you to AJ's?" Rainbow challenges, nudging me with her shoulder. Seriously? Yeah...she's looking to stroke her own ego again. Nope, not falling into that trap.

"Nah. You'd win anyway. I don't even know why you asked," I say. Rainbow pouts.

"Aw, lame. Come on, dude, you can't get faster if you don't try," she whines.

"Answer's still no."

"Ugh, fine. You're no fun." Rainbow accompanies me all the way to Sweet Apple Acres, and then she stops. "I gotta scram. First snows are coming tomorrow, so I gotta get those clouds ready to go."

"Right, whatever," I acknowledge with a wave of my hand. Rainbow's hoof hits that same hand, causing me to look at her oddly. She's grinning at me. Oh, she must have thought I'd been offering...a high hoof. Or whatever they call it.

"Later!" Rainbow is gone in a multicolored flash of light. Damn, it never fails to amaze me how fast she is. She can probably circle this town several times in the amount of time it would take me to cross through it once.

I see Applejack not long after walking through the arch into the farm. I actually need to ask her a question before I get started with today's work.

"Howdy there, Seth!" she greets me, tipping her hat. I give her a wordless nod in response. "Snow's comin' tomorrow, so we got lots o' work ta do."

"Before that, there's something I want to ask you," I interrupt her. Applejack tilts her head, curious. She's probably surprised, since I don't usually say more than two words to her.

"What's that, sugarcube?" she replies. I blink. That's...an odd nickname. What the fuck does that even mean? Is there a connotation to that? Does that mean I'm sweet? I don't even...whatever. I'll call her out on it if she says it again.

"Mind if I leave work a bit early today?" I pose the question to her with a casual expression on my face.

"Uh, what for?" Applejack seems perplexed by my question. Dammit, I'd been hoping she wouldn't ask. Guess I might as well tell the truth.

"I promised your sister I'd pick her up from school today," I confess, cursing myself for having agreed to it in the first place. Besides, I doubt Applejack will take kindly to this anyway. I mean, if I had been seen playing a little girl in my era, somebody would probably call the cops on me. Yeah, I'm serious. My generation was paranoid as fuck.

"Oh, really now?" Applejack now looks genuinely surprised, rather than mad like I expected. "In that case, by all means, ah'll letcha off early."

"Ugh, I knew it was a bad idea an...wait what? You will?" Yeah, I'm not proud to say that I was a little bit shocked that she'd agreed. Applejack chuckles at my double take.

"Actually, this works for me. Ah gotta delivery ta make ta Cheerilee anyway, a bit before school lets out," Applejack says thoughtfully. "Why don'tcha take it with you when ya go? Ah'll pay ya for the trip."

"Yeah, I can do that. Thanks, Applejack."

"No problem, sugarcube." And there it is again. What does it mean?! Whatever...I'm too lazy to care right now. Especially since I'm about to not be lazy. If that makes any kind of sense.

Welp, time to get to work. Again.

* * *

Today's work is particularly grueling. Since winter officially starts tomorrow (despite the fact that it still feels as warm as spring. Someone tell me how that works), Applejack says we have to get all of the apples harvested. Since that's all we've been doing lately, I think we're about done with that.

I don't see much of Big MacIntosh until he shows up in the afternoon to relieve Applejack. Apparently that delivery she's making to Cheerilee is a bunch of apple pies that still need to be baked. So I'm left doing the same exact thing, only under Big MacIntosh. You know, I'm getting really tired of writing his name. I think I'll just call him Big Mac. Hah, like the burger. Which I'm now craving. Fuck.

Several hours later, when Big Mac and I are just about to start clearing the last few trees of apples, Applejack returns, with a cart full of steaming baked goods. And...oh, I can smell that from here. I haven't eaten since this morning, before we pulled that prank. I'm super hungry now. Thankfully I have four bits to my name, plus whatever I get from today.

"Howdy there! Ah got the delivery for ya," Applejack calls to me, coming to a halt a few feet from Big Mac and I. She unstraps herself from the cart and trots up to us. "Looks like yer doin' pretty good! Me'n Big Mac can take it from here."

Hah, even she calls him Big Mac. It's official. I'm calling him that forever. "Understood. I'll be back," I promised.

Now all I have to do is get this cart all the way to the school. Which is across town. Lovely. Slipping under the harness, I rest it on my shoulders, discovering that it's really not all that heavy. I just have to make sure I don't dislodge any of the food.

I begin my trek, knowing that this is essentially the end of my work day, even if I'm getting paid for it.

* * *

It is a really nice day, ironically enough. Heh, it feels like the weather back where I used to live. Warm one day, then cold as shit the next. Then again, I've technically still near the place I used to live, since all that's changed is the time I'm in. That's still weird to think about.

Anyhow, the point I was trying to get to, despite my rambling, is that I'm sweating. Pulling this cart, even if it's not that heavy, is still a real chore. I'm so glad I'm getting paid for this. Money makes everything tolerable.

While I'm walking, I become aware of a peculiar sensation. It's like there's a kind of pressure in the middle of my chest, beneath my sternum. I press my hand against it while I walk in an attempt to discern the source, but to no avail. It doesn't matter where I press, I can't feel anything wrong. It's like having one of those mild sore throats where it doesn't really hurt, but you just feel a strange sense of _wrongness_ at the back of your throat, and you can't feel it no matter where on your throat you look. It's like that, only in my chest. Huh, it's probably just strain from pulling this damn cart.

Well, that can't be right either. Now that I think about it, I've been feeling this same pressure for a while now, ever since...well, ever since I woke up in this damn world. It's just never been as pronounced as it is now. Maybe I should go see a doctor or something. With that resolution, I ignore the pressure and push thoughts about it to the back of my mind.

Doesn't look like any ponies are outside the schoolhouse. I suppose they're still in the middle of a lesson. Not that I care either way. I doubt my job will be considered done if I just leave this cart outside the school. In other words, I'm probably going to end up interrupting the lesson to let Cheerilee know her shit is here.

I leave the cart by the front entrance to the schoolhouse and move towards the door. I can hear the Cheerilee talking from here, as well as the eager voices of the foals inside. Just as I expected, I'm going to be interrupting a lesson.

I pull the door open and step inside. The eyes of several of the foals turn to look at me, and once they see what I am, I get various reactions.

"Oh look, it'th the human!"

"Wow, what is that thing?"

"It looks scary..."

"Seth!" That voice I know. Apple Bloom, who's sitting near the front of the class, waves energetically at me, beaming with happiness. Next to her are Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo, neither of whom look very happy to see me. I can also see Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon, the former of whom is giving me a cool look. Ignoring them, I return Apple Bloom's greeting with a lazy two fingered wave.

"Calm down everypony. If you'll just give me one moment, class, we can continue the lesson." Cheerilee tells the foals. She canters up to me with an inquisitive expression on her face. "Hello, Seth. Is there something I can do for you?"

"Nope. I'm here on the clock. Got a shipment of food waiting for you outside," I tell her, keeping my tone professional. I haven't said more than a few words to this teacher, so being formal with her is necessary, especially if I'm on the job. If there's one thing I've learned about the business world, it's that everything you do as an employee is reflected back on your employer.

"Oh, thank you so much for bringing it. I wasn't aware you were working for Applejack, though." Cheerilee is also being formal. Not overly friendly, but not being a bitch, either. She's not too bad to deal with.

"Yes ma'am. I signed up with her several days ago," I reply stiffly. "Now if you'll excuse me. My apologies for disturbing your lesson."

"It's no trouble. From the looks of it, I might have to start teaching history next," Cheerilee jokes, indicating the curious and awe-filled faces of the class. "Say, would you like to come in some time, and talk to my students about your culture?"

"I'll think about it, ma'am," I lie, remembering to be polite. Yeah, fuck no. I'm not telling anypony a thing about my people. I'll make sure to tell her that when I'm not on the clock. "Have a nice day."

"You too!" Cheerilee says to me as I move towards the door. Then, just before I leave, I remember that I had another purpose for coming here.

"Apple Bloom," I call. Me calling her name causes several of the students to look between Apple Bloom and I. I think I can even see...what is that, jealousy? Seriously, Diamond Tiara? I didn't think you were that butthurt about me not talking to you earlier. Anyway, Apple Bloom looks back at the mention of her name. "I'll be outside by the flagpole when you're done."

With that, I leave the building, walking down the few steps and directing my path towards the flagpole I mentioned. I wonder why they even have a flag. I mean, the flags at the schools where I'm from were always the national flag, so you'd think they'd do the same. But I doubt Equestria's national flag is a plain red triangle. I guess they do things differently in this era.

I think about thirty minutes or so passes before the school bell rings. Though why the school bell rings instead of...you know...the teacher telling the students in the one room school that it's time to leave?

I hear the students talking excitedly as they leave the schoolhouse, probably deciding what to do with the rest of their day. I notice Apple Bloom and her two friends walk out as well, but they don't get very far before they stop and look behind them. Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon walk out next, meeting them. I guess they were the ones that called to Apple Bloom and the others. Which is odd...I thought they weren't friends, especially with how Scootaloo talks about them.

I take a few steps forward until I can hear what they're talking about. Yeah it's eavesdropping, but sue me, I want to know.

"How come you're the one that gets to see him?" Diamond Tiara snaps at Apple Bloom. Huh? Who's him? Some foal she's interested in?

"Because he's ma friend," Apple Bloom answers, confused. That answer serves only to infuriate Diamond.

"As if! A historical being like him would never want to be friends with a loser like you," Diamond scoffs, regarding Apple Bloom with a glare. Oh...they're talking about me. I guess Diamond Tiara really is jealous, for whatever reason. Diamond adopts a devious expression. "In fact, I heard him say that he 'had no need for your friendship.'"

Oh...she did not just...she's...that bitch! Apple Bloom looks like she'd been slapped. She recovers quickly, though. "Yeah raht. Seth would never say somethin' like that! You can't fool me!"

"You think I'm lying? Of course you do, you sad foal. Oh no, he really did say that, didn't he, Silver Spoon?" Diamond Tiara responds coolly. I can't help but feel my blood run cold for some reason. Why is this affecting me so much? That pressure that had been in my chest before comes back, stronger than before.

"Yeah he did! We asked him if he was friends with you, and then he said it!" Silver Spoon chimed in.

"That...that can't be raht..." Apple Bloom trails off, looking at the ground. Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo, for some reason, aren't backing their friend up. Perhaps it's because they'd prefer Apple Bloom hate me?

"Oh, Apple Bloom, you really shouldn't be so surprised. There's nothing for him to like about a bunch of blank flanks like yourselves," Diamond Tiara admonishes her with a sneer. "I'm sure he'd much rather spend time with somepony as rich and classy, like us."

"Definitely!" Silver Spoon adds. I can't think. For some reason, this is making me really angry. I don't know why.

"Lay off, Diamond Tiara!" Scootaloo shoots back, finally coming to the aid of her friend. Diamond just laughs derisively.

"I don't think I will. Apple Bloom, why don't you bring him over here to talk to us?" Diamond suggests.

_"Seth, would you mind doing me a favor?"_ The image of a girl with blonde hair shoots through my mind, causing me to rub my forehead. That's the last thing I want to remember. I need to calm down.

"Why would ah do that? Seth shouldn't have ta deal with ponies like you," Apple Bloom shoots back.

_"No, I'm sick of your goddamn favors."_

"Apple Bloom. Do you remember that time I lent you money so you could buy those tools the other day?" Diamond says casually. I freeze. She...tell me she's not...I can't...

_"Must I remind you of the things I did for you the night before?"_

"It won't be pleasant for you if you refuse." Diamond's words seem to merge with the ones from my memories. Something inside of me snaps. I get to my feet, shaking with rage. Then, it's like my feet are moving on their own. Wind rushes through my hair as I rapidly close the distance between me and the fillies. My gaze is riveted upon Diamond Tiara. I don't know what I'm doing. All I know is that I'm going to teach that bitch a lesson. No one else, especially Apple Bloom, is going to suffer what I did.

"Ah, there you are, Seth. Mind telling these blank fl..." Diamond Tiara gloats triumphantly at first, but when she sees how rapidly I'm moving towards her, as well as the rage filled glare I'm giving her, she realizes that something isn't right. "Wait, what are y..."

Diamond cuts off with a strained gurgle as my right hand closes around her throat like a vice. I lift her clear off of the ground, adrenaline giving me strength. The other fillies gasp in horror as I carry her over to a nearby tree out of sight of the front door and slam her into the trunk hard enough to crack the bark, her tiara falling to the ground from the shock. "You..." I'm so angry I can hardly put together the words in my mind. "I won't let you...!"

"Seth, what are ya doin'?!" Apple Bloom exclaims, galloping over to us, along with Sweetie Belle, Scootaloo, and Silver Spoon. "Please stop!"

"You think you can just...order ponies around like you own them?!" I snarl into Diamond's flushed, terrified face. "You have no right! Don't you understand that you make the lives of the ponies you torment a_living hell?_"

"Diamond Tiara!" Silver Spoon cries out, rushing to help her friend. I deal her a swift kick in the flank, sending the small filly sprawling through the dirt, cracking her glasses and causing her necklace to break, pearls scattering everywhere. The pressure in my chest feels almost like it's trying to get loose, but I somehow manage to hold it back mentally.

"Calling Apple Bloom a loser? For what? Not having a special talent? Look at yourself, you fucker! What the hell kind of talent does a tiara symbolize anyway? Is it supposed to signify that you're rich? Or is your talent being a useless spoiled brat who gets her kicks out of ruining the lives of others?!" The words just won't stop. Diamond Tiara struggles and gasps for air in my grip, but there's no way I'm letting her go.

"Please, Seth, that's enough!" Apple Bloom begs me, but I'm past hearing her.

"Apple Bloom is a million times better than you. She has a future to look forward to, unlike you, who will probably live eating out of your father's hoof for the rest of your life, thinking the world owes you something!" I bring my face dangerously close to hers. "Here's something you may not know. The world doesn't owe you _shit_."

With that, I finally drop her. Diamond hits the ground and gulps in precious air, holding a hoof to her neck. Her eyes are wide and traumatized, which gives me a sense of grim satisfaction. Then, she glares at me, panting. "You...won't...my father..."

"That's right. Call your father. Prove me right, you worthless waste of space," I cut her off with a snarl.

Diamond is silent as she tries to regain her breath. She reaches for her tiara, which is right next to me. Yeah, I don't think so. I stomp my foot down on it, breaking the fragile thing with a crunch. Diamond's cry of anguish tells me that I had broken something important to her.

I notice the other ponies looking at me with fright. Even Apple Bloom is looking at me in shock. What...what the hell...why are you looking at me like that? I helped you...and...fuck this. Fuck you, and fuck this. I whirl around and storm away from them, leaving the school behind. I don't know where I'm going, but I want to be alone, so it doesn't matter where I go.

Why did I let myself lose my temper like that? So what if she was doing to Apple Bloom the same thing Janna did to me? She's not my friend, so it shouldn't be my problem. Then why...ugh, I can't think straight!

Following the path leads me to the river, which instead of crossing to go back in town, I follow it until I reach a place where a railroad crosses it with a bridge. There's a set of stairs that lead down underneath the bridge, probably for maintenance purposes. It looks abandoned right now, which is perfect for me.

Under the bridge, it's very dim, as the only light comes from the sun peeking through the gaps in the bridge. The river flows serenely past me, the sound serving to calm me down a bit.

I feel like shit. I guess Apple Bloom is terrified of me now. I guess she won't talk to me anymore. That's for the best, I suppose. It's better for them to stay away. That's what I keep telling myself, so why does it still hurt?

My fist pounds into the stone, the pain making my feelings easier to deal with. Fuck you Janna. This is your fault. I wouldn't be so messed up if it weren't for you. "FUCK!" I yell aloud, the sound echoing through the enclosed area. Heh...I know what it is. I guess Diamond Tiara essentially became Janna in my mind. I_certainly_ would beaten Janna to a pulp if I saw her there, so...I guess it's really no surprise I took everything out on Diamond. I feel a little bad, though, because I'd essentially yelled at a young girl.

"Seth?" a timid voice calls down from the stairs. At first I think I'm hearing things. At least, until I hear it again. "Are ya down there?"

I look sharply to see the shadow of a single filly on the staircase. That voice...what the fuck is Apple Bloom doing here? "Yeah," I say hesitantly. Why the hell is she here? Isn't she supposed to be frightened of me? I saw her face when I dropped Diamond Tiara. She was terrified.

Apple Bloom walks down the stairs, the clopping of her hooves echoing eerily off of the walls. I don't look at her as she walks to my side. She places her two front hooves on my leg and looks up at me. "Are ya okay?" she asks simply.

"Do I look like I'm fucking okay?" I snap at her. Apple Bloom recoils at the venom in my tone. Immediately I regret shouting at her. "Sorry...I just...dammit."

"What did Diamond Tiara do ta make ya so mad like that? I ain't never seen anyone that mad before," Apple Bloom asks me gently. When I look down at her, I realize that at some point she'd crawled into my lap. I don't know what she's trying to accomplish with that. Without thinking about it, I reach a hand down and start stroking her back like I would a cat's. Looking back at that, it's not that odd. My parents owned two cats, and whenever I'd visit, they'd love to spend time on my lap. That's probably the subconscious connection I made.

"It's not fair. It's just not fair," I growl, rubbing my forehead with my free hand. "How can she think she can manipulate others like pawns? I've had it happen to me, and look how I turned out."

"What? Diamond Tiara bullied you too?" Apple Bloom asks, not understanding. I sigh and shake my head.

"No. It's something that happened a long time ago. Way before you were born," I explain vaguely. I wait to see her nod before I continue. "Everyone used me and then threw me away once they couldn't use me anymore. I couldn't let that happen to somepony else. Especially not you."

"So...ya did that fer...me?" Apple Bloom asks, understanding dawning on her face.

"You're not a bad filly, nothing like the girls I used to know that were your age." My answer doesn't really answer her question, but it makes her happy nonetheless. "I shouldn't have lost my temper like I did. But I meant everything I said."

"Ya didn't say nothin' ah didn't agree with, but ya didn't have ta hurt her," Apple Bloom chides me, reaching up and bopping my nose lightly with a hoof.

"I know...and her father is probably going to give me trouble," I admit. I scratch her behind the ears, like I would a cat. "I'm not sorry for the things I said. But I am sorry for frightening you."

"Aw, it's all raht. ah know ya wouldn't hurt me. But...there is somethin' ah do have ta ask," Apple Bloom says, looking at me seriously. "Do ya consider me a friend?"

I freeze. Dammit, filly, did you have to put me on the spot like this? I don't know how to answer. I'm not comfortable calling her my friend, but I don't hate her. I don't even dislike her. Dammit, what do I say?

"I...can't answer that question," I confess honestly. Apple Bloom's face falls at that, and a pang of guilt shoots through me.

"Why not? Is it somethin' about me?" she asks sadly.

"No. Don't even think that. It's just...it's complicated," I correct her softly. Apple Bloom nods, but I can tell she doesn't really understand.

"Are ya still goin' ta come play?" Apple Bloom inquires innocently, looking up at me with that adorable expression again.

"Wait, you still want me to? Even after all that?"

"Yeah! Ah got so much ah wanna show ya!" she exclaims, hopping off my lap and heading towards the way out. "So are ya coming?"

I pause. I did promise her I'd play with her today. Even after this shit with Diamond happened, she still wants to play. If only I could look past the faults of others like she does.

"Yeah. Let's go play."

* * *

Hoo. And now the end of the arc is in sight. This is the climax of the arc, though don't worry. Like Hamlet (can't believe I'm comparing the two. Thank you literature classes .), the falling action will be even more epic than the climax. At least, that's what I've got planned.

Now I would like feedback on this chapter, because I know what I wanted to happen in the talk with Pinkie and the incident with Diamond, but I'm not sure how well I pulled it off. I'd be grateful for anything you guys can provide.


	17. Seth's Gamble

"So what exactly did you have in mind?" I address Apple Bloom curiously, as we walk up the stairs back to the main road. I don't know why, but whenever I picture fillies playing, all I can think about is hide and seek, tag, or live action roleplaying. I blame Skyrim for that, since that's the only damn games your adopted kids wanted to play. Which was super easy, since all I had to do was stand on a rock they can't climb and watch them run in circles screaming "Where are you, daddy?!" While the whole time I'm laughing my ass off.

"Oh, well ah wanna show ya our clubhouse! It's where the Cutie Mark Crusaders hold their meetings!" Apple Bloom responds eagerly. Okay, what. That name. What the fuck is that, and why is it causing my right eye to twitch spasmodically?

"The what?"

"Cutie Mark Crusaders! It's our secret society. We're lookin' fer our cutie marks!" Apple Bloom explains, and I can't resist the temptation to facepalm. That's...so fucking dumb. Cutie Mark Crusaders...I think I just threw up in my mouth a little at how ridiculously dumb that sounds. What have I gotten myself into?

"Secret...society. So you mean you, Sweetie Belle, and Scootaloo," I deduce with a flat tone.

"Yup!" Apple Bloom's enthusiastic response causes me to rub my forehead. "It's also really warm out, so we can go swimming too. Do ya like swimming?"

"I suppose it can be relaxing. Though if we're going to do that, we'll need to stop by Vinyl's place to grab my swim trunks," I reply thoughtfully. Now that she mentioned it, floating on my back in cool water sounds really good, especially with this weather.

"Huh? Why can't ya just take off ya clothes and hop raht in?" Apple Bloom questions me, perplexed. I blanch at that question. Yeah, there's no way I'm explaining that to a damn filly.

"For reasons I'm not explaining. It's a human thing," is my terse response.

"Oh. Okay. I dunno the way ta Vinyl's house," Apple Bloom says, blinking. She accepted that explanation a little too easily, if you ask me. Or maybe she's just respecting my secrets. Man, that's why I hate dealing with people, or ponies in this case. You never know what they're thinking.

"Follow me then," I tell her. Apple Bloom nods, and then we finally return to the path. Of course, the world seems to have it out for me. Because Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo are standing on the path near us, gasping when they see me with Apple Bloom. I guess they followed her here. "Or, THAT could happen. Fucking...!"

"Hey, Sweetie Belle, Scootaloo. Ah found 'im!" Apple Bloom exclaims happily. Scootaloo's frightened expression turns to one of worry and anger, while Sweetie Belle watches me with an unreadable expression. I wonder what she's thinking.

"Apple Bloom, get away from him. That human is dangerous!" Scootaloo orders her friend, jabbing a hoof at me. Great, I so don't want to fucking deal with this.

"Scootaloo, he's mah friend! Ah ain't just gonna leave him," Apple Bloom argues, not budging. I turn and start walking away.

"I'm leaving. I'll meet you at the farm," I grunt.

"Yeah, get out of here, you freak!" Scootaloo calls after to me. My shoulders shake angrily, but this time I can control myself. Scootaloo is just a prick, not scum like Diamond Tiara.

I don't get much farther before tiny hooves close around my leg, causing me to stumble. "What the..." I look down to see Apple Bloom clinging onto my leg.

"No, please don't go. Scootaloo's just lookin' out fer me, that's all," she pleads, once again wearing that adorable expression that I just can't fucking deny, no matter how much I steel my heart.

"Fucking...fine. You deal with them. I'll sit here and twiddle my damn thumbs or something," I relent. Once Apple Bloom releases me, she smiles and walks back to her friends.

"Ah'll be raht back. Don't ya go anywhere now," she tells me sternly. I scoff and sit down on the riverbank, dangling my legs over the edge. Recently, I've taken to walking around barefoot, since my shoes are pieces of shit now. The streets and grass are soft enough for it not to really hurt, but I'm getting annoyed having to wash off eighty layers of dirt every time I take a shower. It sucks, because I doubt these ponies will have shoes that'll fit me.

"Why is he still here?" Scootaloo demands angrily.

"Why do ya hate 'im so much?" Apple Bloom asks pleadingly, preferring to tackle the problem right at its root. Scootaloo looks shocked at such a question.

"What are you talking about? Every time we've met him, he's been a jerk, and now he's hurt somepony! How can I not hate him?"

"Scoots, there's more ta him than that. While ah don't like how he dealt with Diamond Tiara, ah understand it. Seth's not a simple guy. Ya can't be his friend without willin' ta look beneath the surface," Apple Bloom protests, rather eloquently I might add. Damn...I take it back. She doesn't act mature for her age, she is mature. How the hell does a filly this young act so responsibly? Is it because she works hard on the farm everyday?

"How? How can you keep saying that? Rainbow said the same thing earlier, but nothing he's done has proved her right. There's nothing on the inside worth knowing!" Scootaloo is practically shouting now. Every word she says cuts right into me. Damn...it doesn't matter how many times you hear yourself insulted. It hurts every damn time, especially if they're right. Which she is.

"The better question is, why ain't ya even tryin'? Yer just judgin' him by what ya see on the outside. Don't that make ya the same as Diamond Tiara?" Apple Bloom's words take me by surprise. That's a daring thing to say, especially to a friend. Scootaloo is rendered speechless by that, shocked that her friend would compare her to their worst enemy.

"You..!" Scootaloo begins, but I stop paying attention after that, because my vision is suddenly filled by Sweetie Belle, who's looking at me tentatively.

"Hey...can I talk to you real quick?" Sweetie asks me hesitantly, as if unsure how I'd respond. Which is a decent assumption, because I don't know how to respond. What the hell would she want from me?

"What do you want? You made it pretty clear how unwelcome I am," I answer her sullenly, lifting a rock from the riverbank and throwing it into the water with a _plunk_. Sweetie Belle takes that as permission, so she gets closer.

"I had time to think about what I saw, and...well...I think if my sister ever found out about the way Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon were treating us," Sweetie Belle begins, choosing her words carefully. "I think she would have done the same thing. Probably not as...violent...but that's just how protective she is."

"And your point?" I grunt impatiently. Where are you going with this, Sweetie Belle?

"I wanted to ask you something. Were you being protective of Apple Bloom, when you attacked Diamond?" Sweetie asks. Her question takes me by surprise, and I look at her oddly. Then I start thinking. How do I answer that question?

Honestly, all I'd thought about when I lost my temper was Janna, and how it felt like I was seeing her again in the form of a pony, tormenting a pony that I actually didn't hate, or even dislike. I wanted to stop Janna from hurting anypony the same way she hurt me...and...you know what? Now that I made that connection, I think I can honestly say that Sweetie Belle is onto something.

"I...suppose I was," I admit, both to her and to myself. Sweetie Belle stares at me for a long time, while I hear Apple Bloom and Scootaloo arguing heatedly in the background.

"Tell me ah'm wrong!" Apple Bloom is yelling.

"I...you..." Scootaloo is stammering. Huh, seems like she's losing the argument.

Then, Sweetie Belle smiles at me, and she does something totally unexpected. Yeah, she's the next pony to fucking hug me, wrapping her little hooves around my arm, since she's too small to really hug me.

"What the...I thought you hated me too?" I demand incredulously.

"Well, I didn't like you, but...if you really were being protective, then my sister was right. There really is more to you than I thought," Sweetie Belle explains. Of course, it doesn't make any more sense. Why do all these ponies keep thinking the best of me? No matter how mean or vicious I am, they're always coming back to me, being friendly, generous, and loving. I don't get it. I just don't fucking get it.

Ponies that hate me are changing their minds about me without me really doing anything that would warrant that. First is was Rarity, then it was Rainbow, and now it's Sweetie Belle. Three times is no fluke. Something's up, and I can't just blame it on Twilight like I did before. I haven't seen her talking to Rarity, and I know Sweetie Belle never talked to Twilight since I met her. So what the fuck is really going on?

"I...need some time. I'm gonna go home for tonight," I hear Scootaloo say. Sweetie Belle lets go of me at that and moves to go join her friends, probably to figure out what's going on. In fact, once I see Scootaloo gallop away, I decide to get up and join them myself, now that two of the three of them don't hate me for whatever reason.

"Sorry, Seth. Scootaloo means well. She jus' needs a bit o' time," Apple Bloom assures me when she notices me returning. When she noticed Sweetie Belle's smile, Apple Bloom raises an eyebrow. "Sweetie Belle, where were ya durin all that? ah 'spected you ta agree with Scoots."

"I sorta did. But I can see what you mean now. I went and talked to him myself," Sweetie Belle explains. I start getting somewhat irritated, seeing as everypony is talking about me like I'm not even there.

"Yes, yes, everything is sunshine and happiness. Can we go now? I'm sick of standing around," I cut across them, crossing my arms.

"Yeah! We still gotta stop by yer place, right?" Apple Bloom exclaims, scampering to my side.

"It's not my place, it's Vinyl's. But yes. Come with me, I know the way," I correct her. She doesn't seem to pay attention to that though, instead doing that little "squee" thing ponies all seem to be able to do. I don't even.

"Um...can I come too?" Sweetie Belle asks hesitantly. The two of us look at her with surprise.

"You wanna come play too?" Apple Bloom looks really happy at her friend's show of interest. Sweetie Belle nods shyly. "Seth, can Sweetie come?"

"Whatever," I reply nonchalantly, and they appear to take it as a yes. I start walking, and the two of them fall in step on either side of me.

Now that we're out of that whole awkward situation, Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle start talking about random shit, like the things they learned in class, or different ideas to earn their cutie marks. Nothing that I really care to talk about. It's only when they fall silent and Apple Bloom starts humming.

She's not bad, and it doesn't really strike me as odd until Sweetie Belle starts singing. Yeah, I'm not kidding. She's actually singing to Apple Bloom's song. Like, either they rehearsed it, or this is some of the most badass improvisation I've ever seen.

I gotta write this down, because I love music, and this was really good. Sweetie Belle's voice really blows me away. For a filly her age, a voice like that is almost unheard of.

So the way this starts is Apple Bloom starts...what's the technical word for this...hell I don't know. Basically she forms the rhythm by singing various vowels in such a way that it sounds almost like musical accompaniment. Like the kind of stuff you'd hear in a barbershop quartet or something. Then Sweetie Belle adds her voice.

_"__The summer season passes without a fight_

_the last breath before winter light_

_We walk side by side with a deep mystery_

_Playing through the pages of history."_

Yeah, I think this is good. So imagine my shock when Apple Bloom stops being rhythm and the two of them join together for the chorus. Get this: the two of them harmonize perfectly together. It gave me chills how well their voices blended together.

_"__Time passes with out an end_

_But we stay by you_

_our mysterious friend_

_Out of the blue_

_Our happiness we will lend_

_At last, something new!"_

What in the..those lyrics. Are they talking about me? How the hell did they come up with notes, harmonies, and words so quickly, with such a rigid rhyme scheme? I don't...damn these fillies are talented. When Apple Bloom starts the next verse, Sweetie Belle takes over the rhythm. I can't help but hum a bit myself. It's catchy.

This verse is just a repeat of the first, but it has a whole new twist on it thanks to Apple Bloom's unique voice. It has her accent filtered into it, I mean.

By the time they finish the song, we're standing in front of Vinyl's house. The fillies just look at me expectantly, seeming to completely disregard the fact that they just randomly sang. I walk in, again without knocking. Vinyl is sitting on the couch, reading a book. She looks up in surprise at my entry. "Dude, I wasn't expecting you back til much later," she remarks, shutting the book.

"Yeah, I'm not here for long. I'm here to grab something, then I'm heading back to the farm," I explain. Before she can answer, Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle scamper into the house, being as loud as fillies can be.

"Oh wow, this is where Seth lives!" Apple Bloom gasps in awe, looking around.

"Gosh, you live with Vinyl Scratch! So cool!" Sweetie exclaims, dashing around the couch. Vinyl puts on the most perfect WTF face I've ever seen as the two fillies run around in the living room.

"Apparently you brought friends," Vinyl observes, stating the obvious. I give her an askance glance.

"I wouldn't really call them my friends. They sort of just...follow me around," I remark, indicating the rambunctious duo of fillies. Vinyl sighs in what seems to be disappointment.

"Oh, hey Seth, can we see yer room?" Apple Bloom asks enthusiastically, zipping to a halt just in front of me.

"No. That room is my sanctuary. I don't let ponies inside, except for Vinyl since she owns it, and Rainbow because she won't take no for an answer," I retort, getting disappointed "awws," from the two fillies. "I need to go change. Stay here."

"Hey girls, while he's changing, why don't you come take a look at my sweet tables?" Vinyl suggests, saving me from having to talk any further. The two fillies seem satisfied with that, so I'm not bothered as I climb the stairs and enter my room.

I take my swim trunks out of the dresser and glance at them skeptically. Even though they stretch, it still looks too small for me. Let's see if I'll be hating Rarity after I try this on. Slipping out of my jeans and boxers, I carefully fold them up and leave them on the desk. They're stained with a little sweat, since I wasn't really getting down and dirty, so I should be able to wear them tomorrow to work before having to wash them.

Well, Rarity was right about them stretching. They stretch to a crazy size so that I can get them on, and then they snap back to my skin and cling to it snugly. Unfortunately, there's a slight problem with the crotch area. It fits me very snugly. I curse looking at it. What the fuck, Rarity? Do you think I'm a girl? This looks like it was made without male anatomy in mind and...whelp...I just figured out why. I remember reading somewhere (I don't remember where, which disturbs me) that stallions have sheaths to hide their dicks in, as eloquent as that is. That's probably why she designed them the way she did. Well, fuck, so I'm basically wearing a cross between shorts and a damn speedo.

...Yeah there's no fucking way I'm walking through town wearing this. I unfold my jeans and put them on over my suit. I'll take them off when I get to the lake. Until then, they're staying on.

When I walk down the stairs, I can hear the two fillies giggling and Vinyl laughing uproariously for whatever reason. Turning the corner, I see them in the kitchen, where for some reason, there's an egg balanced on Vinyl's horn, yet there's no juice coming out. What the hell did I miss?

"Okay, let's go or whatever," I say, walking into the kitchen without warning. My sudden entrance startles Vinyl, and she loses coordination, and the egg falls to the ground...or it would have if Vinyl hadn't been quick to grab it with magic. "Vinyl...exactly what were you doing?"

"Winning a bet," Vinyl gloats. "All right you two, I want to hear success stories the next time I see you, all right?"

"You will!" the two fillies chime in together, and then they turn to me.

"Um, weren't ya goin' ta change?" Apple Bloom questions, not noticing a difference in my attire.

"I did. I'm wearing my trunks under these pants," I explain. Apple Bloom nods, and then she grabs my leg, pulling me towards the door.

"Let's go, we're runnin' out o' time!" Apple Bloom exclaims. Her enthusiasm causes me to smile a bit. She reminds me a bit of myself when I was small and innocent.

"All right, I'm going."

* * *

It's a fairly short trip back to Sweet Apple Acres. The work day is just ending, so I should probably go and get my pay, but...eh, I'll probably just grab it after Apple Bloom gets sick of me. Applejack will understand. If not, well fuck her.

"Should we go see the clubhouse first, or go swimming?" Apple Bloom asks me, grinning up at me adorably. Dammit...being this cute should be a crime. I swear, that's the only reason I let her stick around. Yeah, that's what it is.

"Eh, let's go swimming first. I'm tired and want to relax," I reply, pleased that I get to make the decision. Maybe this playing thing won't be so bad after all. For some reason, Sweetie Belle and Apple Bloom exchange glances. What's that all about?

"Cool! The swimming pool is this way, come on!" Apple Bloom responds, and then she takes off like a rocket past the barn and towards the apple orchard. While her energy is somewhat refreshing, I don't feel the need to run after her, like Sweetie Belle does. No, I just walk briskly, my hands in my pockets.

The "swimming pool," as she called it, isn't anything like I expected. When one says swimming pool, they thing chlorinated water with tiled boundaries. Yeah, not this one.

I'm standing at the top of the small cliff that hangs above a decently sized lake. The drop off from this thing isn't that high, which I discover after walking up to the edge and peering down into the water. It's pretty clean water too, since I can see right down to the bottom, which is rather sandy. I wonder if that's natural, or if it's intentional.

Apple Bloom gives a whoop as she zooms off the edge of the cliff, splashing into the water. Sweetie soon follows her in, landing right next to her. The displaced water from Sweetie's fall soaks Apple Bloom, and she splutters. When Sweetie emerges, Apple Bloom splashes her in revenge, and the two engage in an all out splash war.

I strip off my clothes and fold them over the branches of a nearby tree, so they won't get wet. I do the same with my rifle. I shiver a bit as my body gets used to the change in temperature. It feels like I'm wearing only boxers, even though I'm not. It's an odd feeling. I'm gonna get in the water now, so I stop feeling awkward.

I stand at the edge, debating whether or not to jump in directly, or enter the lake from the bottom and walk in slowly. Wait a minute, where did those fillies go? I don't see them in the lake anymore.

I hear muffled giggling behind me, prompting me to turn around. Before I even get halfway turned around, I hear Apple Bloom yell, "Now!" and then suddenly both fillies lunge at me with their front hooves outstretched. Sweetie collides with my lower legs, and Apple Bloom hits my chest. Taken by surprise, I yelp and unbalance, falling backwards off of the cliff.

Just in time, I manage to plug my nose and brace myself, so when I hit the water, it doesn't hurt and I don't swallow any lake water. I sink all the way to the bottom, the water chilling my skin and giving me goosebumps.

Breaking the surface with a gasp, I glare at the two offending fillies, who are rolling around on the top of the hill, laughing at their success. Great, I'd been hoping to keep my hair mostly dry, because it's a pain to take care of when it's wet.

"Hee hee, look at 'im! He's all soakin'!" Apple Bloom giggles, pointing a hoof at me.

"I guess you could say he 'fell' for it!" Sweetie Belle jokes, making a pun so bad it makes me groan and facepalm.

"Congratulations, you pushed a human off a cliff. Proud of yourselves?" I return sarcastically, swimming over to the edge of the lake and hoisting myself out. Judging by how they continue to laugh and do that...fuck it, even if it's not technically correct, I'm just going to call it a high five. So they high fived, so I think they are proud of themselves. Well, it's time to change that.

Sweetie Belle sees me coming, her eyes widening when she sees me cracking my knuckles. She immediately leaps off of the cliff into the water to escape my incoming wrath. Apple Bloom doesn't notice me until I'm already there. She yelps and tries to copy Sweetie Belle, but I reach down and scoop her up into my arms. "Oh no you don't," I growl playfully, mussing up her mane with my free hand.

"Aah! Lemme go!" Apple Bloom cries, giggling despite her plight. I lift her up and hurl her off of the edge...or at least I would have, if she hadn't clung to my hand with all four hooves. I shake my hand, but she doesn't budge.

"Let go, you little rascal." I reach over my other hand in an attempt to pry off her hooves, but she grabs onto that one as well and scurries up my arm like a fucking ninja pony. She attempts to jump off my shoulder to the ground.

"You'll never catch m...eep!" Apple Bloom's boast is cut short as I reach my right hand over my head and grab her back hoof. I pull her back in, but she soon escapes my grip. The two of us then engage in a weird little game where I keep trying to grab her and throw her, and she keeps slipping around me, also like a ninja pony.

Okay, that's enough of this. I manage to grab her around the chest, but I can tell she's about to slip free again. Instead of letting her, this time I seize the moment to rush forward and jump off the cliff, taking her with me.

"Geronimo, motherfuckers!" I yell out triumphantly as Apple Bloom squeals in exhilaration, and then we both hit the water with a colossal splash.

I find that when we break the surface, Sweetie Belle is finding this whole thing hilarious. "I guess you weren't fast enough, Apple Bloom!" she teases her friend, who is giggling and spluttering, looking sheepish. She turns to splash me, but I've gone underwater.

You see, I have this thing about people (or ponies) who gloat. I tend to exact revenge, you see. As I undulate my body through the water, I orient myself on the kicking legs of Sweetie Belle that are keeping her afloat.

Sweetie Belle squeaks in shock when I emerge from the water behind her. Before she can move, I wrap my arms around her. "Better hold your nose," I warn her as I place a hand on top of her head.

"Wait, no no no...!" Sweetie protests right before I dunk her under the water. Apple Bloom laughs uproariously when her friend comes back up with her mane all over the place. "That wasn't fair..."

"Oh, and knocking me off a cliff was? Don't prank someone if you're not willing to get pranked in return," I counter, fixing my hair so that it isn't poking at my eyes. Of course, that becomes all pointless when Sweetie Belle splashes me in retaliation. "Okay, this means war."

The three of us engage in a ridiculous splash war over the next few minutes. Well, by splash war, I mean they splash me while I chase after them to dunk them. I'd been hoping to relax and float on my back or something, but I seem to have forgotten how taxing it is to do that with fillies around. Ah well, I'm having fun just fucking around.

After we get tired of that, I somehow get suckered into playing some of their filly games, some of which hold a remarkable resemblance to some of the games human children would play. Like we play something a little like Marco Polo, only instead of saying that, the fillies insisted on saying "Daring Do," though I have no fucking idea who that's supposed to be.

"Do! Aw come on, Seth, yer peekin'!" Apple Bloom complains after I grab her.

"It's not my fault you make so much noise when splashing around," I respond. "Now where the hell are you, Sweetie? Daring!"

There's another game we play as well. It's literally just catch, except they assign some sort of point values depending on how you catch the ball. Like, Apple Bloom throws the ball a little too high, and so I toss Sweetie Belle up so she can grab it, which earns the both of us fifty points: twenty points for catching it, and thirty for style. No one is really supposed to win, it's all for fun. Which is good, since I hate overly competitive games.

"Sweetie, how many points do ya get fer a front flip corkscrew catch?" Apple Bloom asks curiously as I splash into the water triumphantly with the ball grasped in my hands.

"Uh...I don't think that one's in the book. Let's just make it up. Forty points?" Sweetie suggests, which I hear after I re-emerge.

"Oh come on! That's total bullshit. How does that get less points than throwing Sweetie Belle at it?" I protest, causing the fillies to giggle.

Finally, after an hour or so of just fucking around, we're interrupted by Applejack, much to my horror.

"Apple Bloom, it's time for dinner and...oh, Seth. I'd thought you'd gone home," Applejack calls down to us from the top of the cliff. I freeze, in the middle of wrestling the ball from Apple Bloom, with Sweetie on my back trying to steal it from us. Well shit.

"And not get paid? Are you kidding me?" I reply, letting go of the ball and removing Sweetie from my back. I already got caught, so the most I can do is preserve at least some of my dignity.

"I suppose not. Well, why don't you all dry off and come in for dinner?" Applejack invites, beckoning to us with a hoof. And she invited me to dinner again. Seriously? If I didn't accept it the first three times, why would you think now would be any different?

"Yeah no. I'll be heading home," I refuse flatly, swimming towards the edge of the lake and climbing out. The first thing I do is immediately start wringing the water out of my hair, since I have rather a lot of it.

"Awww, why can't ya stay fer dinner?" Apple Bloom asks, gazing at me soulfully. Fuck...not those goddamn eyes again. Fuckin...not this time. There's no way I'm giving in to Applejack's offer.

"Vinyl is expecting me. Maybe another time," I lie, just to give Apple Bloom some peace of mind.

"Okay...well ya gotta come see the clubhouse tomorrow!" she insists. Damn...she's really insistent on spending time with me. I can't possibly imagine why though.

"Maybe if I have time," I respond insincerely. I plan on taking tomorrow evening for myself, since I haven't had any real alone time since I got here.

"Bye, mister Seth!" Sweetie Belle calls to me as I move to pick up my clothes. Applejack passes me a towel, which she'd kept in her saddlebags.

"Ah'll see ya later then," Apple Bloom says softly, having gotten out of the water to see me off. She rears up and plants her two front hooves on my legs, looking up at me. Sighing, I kneel down so she can reach me. She smiles and nuzzles my cheek. And just because I know she likes it, I gently push my cheek against her, reciprocating her affection. Her squee lets me know I've done something right.

Applejack stands totally nonplussed, watching our display with a dumbfounded expression. I stand back up and glare at it, having noticed her stare. "Not staring would be nice," I snap at her, breaking her from her stupor. In the meantime, I start drying myself off.

"Oh. Sorry sugarcube. Just didn't think I'd see ya actin' so happy with ma sister," Applejack explains sheepishly.

"Okay, that's enough. This 'sugarcube' thing? What is up with that?" I snap. I've finally had it with the holw nicknames thing. Between Rarity's "darling," and Applejack's "sugarcube," I'm being driven nuts. Applejack is taken aback.

"What, that? It's just a nickname. I don't mean nothing by it," Applejack replies, perplexed.

"Well stop it. My name is Seth. Fucking use it," I express plainly. Looking chastened and still a little confused, Applejack murmurs an apology, and then proceeds to fish for something in her saddlebags.

"Here's yer pay. Tomorrow's gonna be a short work day, so ya don't have ta come in til about noon, cuz it'll be all snowy," Applejack informs me, handing (hoofing?) me a sack of bits. I'll look at how much is in there later. For now, I hand her the towel back, and then I get dressed, slinging my rifle over my shoulder.

"Got it. I'm leaving now." With that, I spin on my heel and stalk away, heading towards the archway that leads back to town. Behind me I see Applejack, Apple Bloom, and Sweetie Belle chatting amongst themselves, and then they enter the main barn, leaving me completely alone as the sky darkens.

Everything seems normal at first as I pass through the arch, but when I see three silhouettes emergingfrom the gloom in front of me, I start to get a bad feeling.

There are stallions – three of them – walking towards me. The moment they spot me, they orient their paths to intercept mine, like they're looking for me. The one standing in the middle looks the most important. He's a tan brown, lean earth pony, with a darker brown, slicked back mane style that gives him an air of sophistication. He's actually wearing clothing, in the form of a dark blue business suit with a white collar, complete with a red tie marked with the image of a dollar sign. His ass is marked by the image of three money bags.

The other two are very similar in appearance, being both white earth ponies with dark manes. They're heavily muscled, and the way they're looking at me makes me feel threatened. They're clearly ruffians of some sort.

The one in the center is gazing at me coolly, but I can tell from his body language that he clearly wants to rip my guts out for whatever reason.

They've seen me, so there's no point in running. I bravely walk up to them, and they and I stop once we are within talking range of each other.

"You are the human, Seth Rogers, are you not?" the center pony asks me in a smooth, business-like voice.

"It appears you have me at a disadvantage," I reply, my hand resting on my rifle for assurance. I don't know what these guys want, but it can't be for friendly purposes. Not with the way those two are eyeing me.

"Quite. My name is Filthy Rich, though I doubt you've heard of me. You may know me as Diamond Tiara's father," the pony introduces himself, adjusting his tie. I shut my eyes and sigh. I guess she went ahead and did it. Well, this is probably going to end very badly for me.

"Ah. Then I can't say I'm surprised to see you. Though I wonder why the police aren't with you," I stall. The more I keep him talking, the more time I have to think of a way out of this. The area is pretty open, so there's no place to hide. They're earth ponies, so there's no outrunning them.

"Of course they aren't. This is a family matter, and as such should be dealt with..." Filthy Rich pauses for a moment to lift up a hoof, gaze at it, and then glare at me. "...personally."

Yup, I'm pretty fucked. "So you plan on doing this under the table then? Wouldn't you rather do this in a less open place?" I point out, sweeping my hand over at the farm.

"There's no need. This will be over soon enough." Filthy Rich asserts. Shit...that would have been my chance to escape. "Gentlemen, if you would? I still need to buy my daughter a replacement tiara."

Filthy Rich gestures at me, and the two thugs approach me menacingly, one of them breaking off to circle around behind me. I need to think fast. I don't think I can fight them...and there's gotta be a way out of this that doesn't involve getting my ass kicked. I don't know this guy, so he could be planning to kill me.

Then it hits me. "I wouldn't do that if I were you," I declare confidently, slowly removing my rifle from my back. The confidence in my voice causes them to pause for a moment.

"And why is that? Why shouldn't I claim compensation from a monster such as yourself?" Filthy Rich returns, looking utterly uninterested.

"You clearly don't know anything about humans. Do you know what this is?" I say, holding up the rifle. The confused looks on their faces tells me everything I need to know. "That's what I thought. Allow me to explain."

I show them the different angles of the rifle as I frantically search my mind for details on this kind of rifle. Fuck it, I'll just say what I remember. Everything else I'll just make up. They won't know the difference. "This is a 3rd Generation Special Operations Forces Combat Battle Rifle, more commonly known as a SCAR-H. What it does is that it can fire a small metal projectile from this muzzle here at about six hundred and eighty miles per hour. You know what's even better? It can fire about six hundred of these projectiles a minute."

My bluff is working. I can see the shock and fear in their eyes increase as I describe the weapon. Hopefully I won't have to prove that this thing actually works. Since it's out of ammo.

"B...Boss," one of the thugs stammers, watching my rifle closely.

"That's right. Are you going to back off like a smart little pony? Or are we going to find out who the _real_apex predator is here?" I ask in a dangerously soft voice, and then I cock the gun, which makes an intimidating clanking sound. Come on...please work...please work.

"Hmph. Fall back, you two. It appears we have underestimated our enemy," Filthy Rich orders, and my heart soars in triumph. There's no way this just fucking worked. It did! The thugs are backing off! Oh my god, you ponies are so fucking stupid! "Don't think I'll forget this, Mr. Rogers."

"Nah, I fully expect you to come kill me in my sleep or something. But there's something you need to know before you go," I assert, resting the rifle on my shoulder. Filthy Rich looks back at me jas as they're starting to leave, choosing not to reply and wait for my next words. He's not going to like this, but I feel it has to be said. "Your daughter is a bully. A real menace."

"You're not the first to lie..." Filthy Rich begins, but I cut him off.

"Shut up. Let me guess, other ponies have complained to you about her, and every time Diamond Tiara just flutters her pretty little eyelashes and says, 'oh no, daddy, I could never bully anypony.' And then you believe her because you're a FUCKING IDIOT!" My voice rises until I'm shouting at him.

"How dare..."

"Excuse me, I'm not done talking. Perhaps you should take your head out of your ass and ask around? I guarantee that you'll find that everypony you talk to will have the same thing to say: that your lovely little princess isn't as innocent as she appears," I snap, pointing the rifle at him when he tries to approach me. That makes him back the fuck off. "You're a pretty shitty parent. I bet you worked your ass off to get where you are today: rich and well off. I bet you learned a lot on that journey."

Filthy Rich is actually nodding in agreement with my last two sentences, once he finishes looking offended. Good, then this will hit him pretty hard.

"Do you think it's fair to this 'daughter' that you love so much doesn't get to learn those same lessons? How will she survive on her own?" Yep, he gets it now. Of course, he isn't happy about it.

"Who do you think you are, monster, to tell me how to raise my own daughter?" Filthy Rich shoots back, though he makes sure not to step any closer.

"I'm the guy that had to nearly asphyxiate your daughter in order to keep her from ruining another filly's life!" Now I'm yelling at him. He just gets angrier when I bring up what I did to her. "If you don't believe me, just ask your damn daughter, and I mean REALLY ask her, and not just take her shit like you always do!"

Filthy Rich goes silent, and even the thugs look at him in fright. "Very well," he finally says. "I will indeed speak with her. If I find that you are lying...I will come back with the guard, and then no human weapon will save you."

"Knock yourself out. Now please get the fuck out of my face so I can go home," I grunt. Filthy Rich glares at me one last time, and then he stalks away, beckoning for his thugs to follow him. I don't budge an inch until I can barely see them.

I let out the breath that I had been subconsciously holding. Goddamn that was tense. I was sure my bluff would be called, and I would get beaten to death. I kiss the muzzle of the rifle lovingly. It doesn't even have any bullets, and it's still saving my ass.

I'm probably going to have to deal with the guard somehow. I did hurt a filly, and I doubt Filthy Rich is going to take my advice seriously. He'll probably ask her, and then fall under her sway like always. I've seen relationships like that, and it never ends well when you challenge the father. If I hadn't pretended that this rifle actually worked, he'd have beaten the shit out of me for the things I said.

Well, I don't give a fuck if I end up in pony jail. At least then I'll have that alone time that I've been wanting.

A few minutes later, I'm walking back into Vinyl's house as the sun dips below the horizon. The house is completely silent for some reason. I wonder where Vinyl is? Oh well.

I take the opportunity to walk upstairs and shut myself in my room. I set the rifle against the desk and strip out of my clothes, before finally slipping into bed. It's high time I got some quality sleep. I think I'm gonna go to bed early tonight. That way I'll wake up feeling rested.

Who knows what's going to happen tomorrow.

* * *

I've been envisioning that scene at the end of this chapter for several months, especially the line about the apex predator. It feels so surreal that I've stuck with this long enough to actually write that part out. I'm a little excited.

This arc should be over in the next chapter. Or if it takes too long, two chapters. But generally near the end of an arc, I go into overdrive, so you'll probably get a double update.

Also, if you're wondering why those song lyrics up there didn't have a music link, it's because I wrote them, and I can't write accompaniment to save my life.

Stay tuned! It's gonna be epic!


	18. Insanity

This morning, I allow myself to sleep in a bit, since I'm not required to be at the farm at like, eight in the morning. It's glorious. So much shit has happened since I got here, I really need this extra sleep.

That being said, when the smell of cooking eggs reaches my nostrils, I lurch up in bed in an instant, my mouth already watering. "Sweet baby Jesus, what is this gloriousness I'm smelling?" I utter to myself, leaping to my feet, reaching for my money bags. Adding yesterday's pay, I have a total of fifteen bits. I could go to the spa this morning...pfft, like hell. Nah, I'm probably going to spend a few bits having some of whatever it is my landpony is cooking downstairs, set aside the rent payment, and save the rest so that I can eventually get a place of my own.

I slip on the clothes I was wearing two days ago, which are the jeans and the dark violet shirt. They still smell all right, so I can still wear them. Of course, that will probably change by the end of the day, but that's future me's problem. Then I toss open my door with gusto and bound down the stairs, the smell only getting better the closer I get to it.

"The hell are you making, Vinyl?" I demand, walking into the kitchen, taking my host by surprise. Vinyl nearly drops the pan she's holding, but she doesn't, because that would have been a tragedy. The yellow mess in the pan means I was right in suspecting that she's making some form of eggs.

"Oh wow, morning bro. Didn't expect you to sound so energetic this early in the morning," Vinyl greets me once she sets the pan back on the stove to cook. She notices me staring at her expectantly, and then she fucking realizes that I asked a question that I want answered. "Oh right. Well I'm making omelets. Want some?"

"Damn straight I do. Seems like the most normal thing I've seen to eat so far," I state like it was the most obvious thing in the world. I fish out a bit from my sack and flip it towards Vinyl, who grabs it with her magic and sets it aside with a resigned sigh.

"Awright, I'll serve you up then. What do ya like on your omelets?" she asks, folding the newly forming omelet over a bunch of mushrooms that she levitates in there.

"Well, I'd ask for bacon, but you ponies don't eat meat. So mushrooms, peppers, and olives if you have them," I supply helpfully, lamenting the loss of one of mankind's greatest invention. I don't really care what I eat, but bacon...that's a rather hefty loss there.

"I don't have olives, but the rest I got. That cool with you?" Vinyl checks with me, looking back at me with those magenta eyes of hers. I shrug uncaringly. So what if I don't get olives? All they do is add a bit of extra flavor. I'm just happy to be getting some eggs.

I lay back on the chair, shutting my eyes and letting that glorious egg smell fill my nose. I start dozing off, not even caring since it's still relatively early. It's only when a plate of hot omelet is slid on the table in front of me that I wake up again.

"By the way, this came for you in the mail," Vinyl says causally, levitating an envelope over to me. This gets my full attention.

"Who the fuck would send _me_ a letter?" I demand rhetorically, since I doubt Vinyl has any clue. I look at the envelope, noting how ornate and embellished it is.

"Not a clue, bro. Looks pretty flashy though," Vinyl remarks, referring to how fancy it looks. I scoff and turn the letter over, looking for some sign of identification. When I look at the front of it, glowing letters form one by one before my eyes, spelled in a fancy cursive font.

"From Princess Celestia. Canterlot Royal Suites," I read off the letters aloud just to make sure I'm not imagining this. "Holy shit."

"Wow, dude, that's from Princess Celestia? That's one heck of an honor. Only Twilight gets private correspondence from her," Vinyl marvels, peering over the table to see the writing herself.

"Yeah, she must be nuts. Well, let's see what miss mind reader has to say this time," I remark, callously ripping open the top of the envelope.

Then a beam of yellow light hits me and sends me back to my time like nothing had happened. Pfft. Wouldn't that be nice. Nope, I pull out the letter inside as normal and unfold it.

_"Dear Seth,_

_It's been a while since we last spoke. I wanted to check up on you, and see how you are acclimatizing to life in Ponyville. It's a quiet and charming town, well removed from the bustle of Canterlot. It saddens me that I am unable to put aside more time for me to visit it._

_Have you made any progress towards making friends? I'd love to hear about it, if you don't mind me prying. In fact, I'd like to extend an invitation for you to come visit me in Canterlot for a weekend. I can take care of any and all expenses involved, if you're interested._

_Your loving friend,_

_Celestia."_

I set the letter down, my mouth stretched into a thin line. Whelp, I just got invited to the capitol of Equestria by the Royal fucking Princess of the Sun. For free no less. Yeah...right. "That's not happening," I declare flatly.

"What did she say?" Vinyl questions cocking her head.

"Pretty much invited me to go to Canterlot. For free. Fuck that, there's no way I'm going to be in debt to royalty."

"Wait, and you're not doing it? But..."

"It's like saying, 'my head on a chopping block? Yes please!' Fucking...yeah right! How stupid does she think I am?" I rant, throwing my hands up in the air. "Oh look at me, I'm this benevolent ruler, I want to earn your trust..blah blah blah, by the way, would you like to be in my debt? I promise I won't abuse it _too_ much!"

"Dude..."

"Nope. I'm burning this shit. Mind keeping that burner on a bit longer?" I cut her off, my rage growing. Vinyl promptly shuts off the stove with her magic, looking exasperated. With that avenue removed, I try to tear the paper to shreds, but Vinyl again uses her magic to take it from me.

"You really need to chill out, bro," Vinyl scolds me, and then she glances over the letter herself. She then gives me a look that clearly says, _really_? "Dude, she's being friendly, that's all. You really shouldn't read too far into these things. What if I lived in Canterlot and asked you to come hang?"

"If you were offering to pay all my expenses, I'd call bullshit on you too. Nobody spends that kind of money on someone they only met once," I answer her without hesitation. Vinyl groans, letting her head fall to the table's surface. I proceed to dig into my omelet, which is just as good as I expected.

We eat our breakfast in silence. Vinyl's clearly mad at me for saying the things I did about the princess, but I could care less what she thinks. Once I finish eating, I glance up at the clock. "Time for me to get going. I'll get back when I get back."

Vinyl remains quiet as I shoulder my rifle and open the front door. The moment I step outside...I regret it. A blast of frigid air and snow greets me, stinging my skin. I walk back inside immediately, shutting the door. "Right. The snows happen today. I'm getting changed." I deadpan.

I step back outside again a few minutes later, dressed in the winter outfit Rarity made for me. It's really warm, keeping out most of the cold, so now it's only my face, hands, and feet that are cold. Yeah, going barefoot in the snow is a terrible idea, so I was wearing my shoes, which are falling apart.

Nothing of note really happens on my trip to Sweet Apple Acres, at least until I'm walking through the square. I spot Filthy Rich, and I freeze. He's not looking at me though. He's wandering from pony to pony, talking to them for maybe a minute or so each, before moving on to the next. I step closer to him until I can hear his conversation.

"...what you know about my daughter," Filthy Rich says in a demanding tone to Carrot Top, who is his latest victim.

"Well..." Carrot Top stammers, taken off guard by Filthy Rich's confrontational stance.

"Let me remind you that if any of your words are discovered to be false, I can and will prosecute you to the fullest extent of the law," Filthy Rich adds threateningly. What the fu...wow, he really took me seriously, didn't he? A little too seriously, if you ask me.

Unfortunately, as I move to leave, he notices me, and the two of us lock eyes, staring intensely at one another. He narrows his eyes, and then he gives me a terse nod before going back to his interrogations. Well, that had the potential to go very wrong. I'm glad that didn't happen.

"Seth!" Lyra is coming from the other direction, looking sympathetic. "Did Filthy accost you too?"

"No, why?" I play dumb, even though I know full well why he's doing what he's doing.

"According to Bon Bon, he had a blow out with his daughter or something, so now he's going around asking everypony their opinion of her, under pain of legal action," Lyra explains, falling in step with me. I sigh, realizing that I'm not going to get rid of her. But, I am feeling slightly mollified, knowing that he took my advice to heart. I suppose he saw the true side of his daughter for once.

"Huh, how about that?" My voice is slightly sarcastic, causing Lyra to look at me suspiciously.

"You didn't have anything to do with that, did you?" she says accusingly, though not in an angry manner.

"I don't know what you're talking about," I say, equally sarcastically. Lyra pauses, and then she grins, batting my side with a hoof.

"I don't believe it. You cheeky human, you actually told him about her actually being a brat?" It sounds like she's actually praising me. "That takes guts, Seth. I'm envious."

"Why couldn't anypony else do it?" I demand, actually curious. Lyra looks both directions before answering in a lower voice.

"Because Filthy Rich is the head of one of the wealthiest businesses in Equestria. His family is partly responsible for Ponyville's founding, and even now he is responsible for most of the town's upkeep," Lyra explains. Okay, that part I didn't know. So what, I essentially chose to go against one of the most influential ponies around. Good job Seth, you sure know how to pick your enemies. "One word from him could ruin any of our lives. That's why nopony said anything, in case he got offended."

"Good thing I did it then. I don't have a life to ruin," I quip darkly. Lyra's face falls, and then she gives me a hug, irritating me further. "Get off me. You ponies are way too touchy-feely."

"Eeeeh, you know you like it," Lyra jokes. I immediately push her off, disgusted.

"And stop flirting with me! I'm not interested!"

"I know. I'm just doing it because it annoys you." Lyra sticks her tongue out at me immaturely.

"You...frustrating pony!" Lyra's laughter tells me I'm not dissuading her at all. Thankfully, I'm almost to Sweet Apple Acres. I wonder what Applejack's going to have to me do now that the apples are all bucked or whatever.

"It's so much fun messing with you," Lyra tells me with a grin.

"Uh-huh." I deadpan. "Now if you don't mind, I have to get to work."

"Okay. I'll see you later then," Lyra says, and then she stops following me. "You should come check out Bon Bon's store when you're done. I'll be there too!"

"Right..." I reply, making a mental note to avoid Bon Bon's shop like the plague. Now that I'm rid of her, I make my way into Sweet Apple Acres through the snow drifts that have formed. I guess the pegasi really went all out into this snowfall today. Still feels weird that weather needs their help to work.

I'm on my way to the barn when something cold and wet smacks me right in the face without warning. Spluttering, I reach a hand up to my face to discover that I'd been hit with a snowball. Who the fuck...is this supposed to be a joke? I'm not laughing. I'm about to tear the culprit a new asshole...or at least I was until I hear Apple Bloom's giggling. Instead, I settle with a sigh. Had it been anypony else, I'd be killing them right now. Instead...I know the best way to retaliate.

"Gotcha Seth!" Apple Bloom declares, walking out from behind a snow drift. She looks awfully pleased with herself. "Hehe, you should see yer face raht now! Ya look so...ah mean...um..."

The filly trails off when she notices the head sized snowball I'm holding in my right hand. I raise an eyebrow at her surprised face. "Yep. Payback's a bitch, isn't it?" I remark, and then I throw the snowball directly into her face, just like she had me. Apple Bloom's squeak of dismay gets me laughing. "Think twice before challenging a guy with thumbs."

Apple Bloom shakes herself clean, and then she tries to look indignant, but she doesn't really know how, so she just screws up her face and starts laughing as well. Then she leaps up at me. This time I'm ready for her, so I catch her in my arms, bringing her to my face so she can nuzzle me like she's grown so fond of doing. "Ah'll getchu next time," she whispers to me ominously, and then she giggles again.

"Right. What are you doing out of school anyway? Isn't it a Friday?" I ask, wondering if their school system works the same as ours.

"Yup! We get out early on Fridays," Apple Bloom answers happily, snuggling in my arms as I start walking towards the barn again. Fucking...wow, she's so damn cute. She's like a cat that can talk.

"How's Diamond Tiara?" I ask hesitantly. I don't really care how she is, but part of me is morbidly curious as to how she acted after I hurt her.

"Ah actually didn't see her at school today. It's really weird; she never misses school," Apple Bloom responds. "Ya think she's all right?"

"I could care less. Just wondered if she took my advice, is all," I grunt, scratching Apple Bloom behind the ears absentmindedly.

Applejack comes out to meet us once we near the barn. Once she sees me holding Apple Bloom, her eyebrows shoot up, and I hastily put Apple Bloom down, and then avert my eyes, hoping Applejack doesn't say anything. "Awww," Apple Bloom complains, but I ignore her.

"Mornin' Seth. Yer a bit early," Applejack greets me after an awkward moment. Thank god she didn't confront me about her sister. I don't know why I care. It's not my fault she crawls over me all the time...yeah. "Like ah said, it'll be a short work day today. Jus' need ya to come in an' help prep the barn fer the winter season. Might take a few hours, but that's it."

"Whatever. Just point me to where you need me," I respond apathetically. Applejack smiles and guides me inside, along with her sister.

By prepping the barn, she meant doing all sorts of chores around the place, from things as inane as doing laundry to things as intensive as repairing notches in the roof or chopping firewood. Yeah, so let me tell you how awkward it is to do pony laundry. Especially in a family of mostly females. It's inevitable that I come across a set of lingerie, which can only be Applejack's. Or at least I hope they are.

Why the fuck does she even have them? Ponies don't wear clothes...so what exactly is the importance of lingerie? Unless...she...I'm going to stop this line of questioning right here. I'm just gonna...put these in the wash...yeah. I don't really want to know.

What takes me the longest is the firewood, since I'm weak as shit. I know I can hear Applejack stealthily snickering behind my back every time I miss the log and hit the block, the vibrations making me drop the axe. My arms start to ache after only a few minutes of that job. Maybe that means I'll eventually get muscle from this.

The work day ends with me fixing a hole in the roof, which is a miserable job, especially in the wind and snow. I never thought I'd be thanking Rarity this much for these glorious clothes.

When I'm done, I meet Applejack, Big Mac, and Apple Bloom in the living room, which is gloriously warm. "Good job up there, sug...uh...ah mean Seth," Applejack praises, holding out my pay for that day.

"Hang on, there's another ten bits in here. I didn't work ten hours," I observe, looking at her suspiciously. Applejack is smiling, which is really suspicious.

"Different work means different pay rates," she explains. Huh...that's probably the only explanation I'll accept. Especially since I have heard of some employers giving out bonuses for those dedicated enough to come to work even in icy conditions. So this gives me 23 bits. Yeesh, my saving up is really working out for me. I have a decent surplus right now, so I won't be hurting for food or rent for a while. "Care to stay for dinner?"

"No," I reply immediately, having accepted that she's going to ask me every time. Once more, she simply acknowledges me with a nod of her head. This pony is infuriating. Just as I'm turning to leave, something impacts with the window with a loud thud, making everyone in the room jump, including me. "What the fuck?"

Applejack opens the window, which is thankfully facing downwind, so no snow comes in. "Dash, did you mess up another trick?" the farmer pony questions wryly. Wait, Rainbow's here?

"Nah...just forgot to compensate for those wind currents." Rainbow's brightly colored head sticks up rather comically, and then she slides inside the room from outside. She shakes the snow off her coat like a dog, much to Applejack's disapproval. "They get strong really fast before you notice and...oh hey, Seth!"

Rainbow sidles over to me with a smile. She raises her hoof, like she's asking for a high five, but then she remembers who she's dealing with, and instead settles with nudging me. "How's it hanging?" she asks conversationally.

"Cold and sore," is my eloquent response. Seriously, what the fuck do you expect me to say? Man, I hate those kinds of questions. How are you? Did you sleep well? My response of choice is usually shut the hell up to people I don't know.

"Heh, tough it out, dude! Maybe you'll get as strong as me one day," Rainbow retorts, and then she starts peeking at my muscles. "So scrawny."

"Can you stop?" I snap at her, waving her off. "You asked, so I told. No need to rub your superiority in my face."

"Just telling it like it is! Anyhow, you finished here? I kinda want to go for a run, if you wanna join me," Rainbow doesn't seem fazed by my rude attitude at all. Oh right, my legs, the only part of me that doesn't ache. Pft, might as well fix that.

"Yeah, I'm done. I'll tag along, but only if you don't leave me in the damn dust," I tell her, causing her grin to get wider.

"All right! We'll get you tougher in no time!" she declares, wrapping a hoof around my shoulders.

"Thank you, personal trainer Dash," I deadpan, the sarcasm practically dripping from my tone. "Now if we're gonna go, let's go."

"Ah'll see ya tomorrow then!" Applejack calls after us as we open the door and step outside. Guess I'm working tomorrow. Who knows what they'll have me do.

"Bye, Seth!" Apple Bloom adds. I wave my hand in response, and then the door shuts behind us.

"Fuck, it's cold," I complain, my teeth already starting to chatter. Rainbow immediately breaks into a run, taking me by surprise. I start to run after her. "Hey! Give me some warning first!"

"If you're cold, get moving! We're gonna lap around Ponyville twice!" Rainbow declares, causing me to groan.

"What the hell?! Wasn't this just going to be a casual run?" I demand.

"This is a casual run for the Dash!" Of fucking course it is. Damn Herculean pony. My lungs almost immediately start to burn, and then freeze as I breathe in the frigid air. This is going to dehydrate me pretty fast, probably. On the bright side, I'll get warmer if I do this. I heard joggers love it when it's cold for that very reason.

We're only running for a few minutes before an unexpected occurrence stops us in our tracks. We're just about to break away from the path when we notice a very familiar business pony approaching us at a run. Is that Filthy Rich? What is he doing here?

"Mr. Rogers! Wait, please!" I can hear desperation in his voice. What the hell could have happened to make such a proud pony take a tone like that? It's curious enough for me to slow to a stop, much to Rainbow's frustration.

"What are you doing, Seth? We've got a long way to go!" Rainbow demands. I point to Filthy Rich, who has just reached us. "Oh...uh...hi there, Mr. Rich."

"The hell do you want?" I snap venomously. Yeah, I'm don't like him one bit. Filthy Rich doesn't look at all angry at the tone I took with him. Instead, he takes a moment to collect his breath, and then he grabs my shirt with a hoof.

"You have to help my daughter! She can't...you were right, she can't handle herself on her own!" Filthy Rich cries. I'm struck speechless. I have no words for what he just said to me. Just yesterday, he'd been ready to beat me within an inch of my life, and now he's asking for my _help? Are you fucking kidding me?_

"Yeah, no. There's no way I'm helping that bitch. Or you, for that matter," I deny vehemently. Rainbow, however, shoots me a glare and steps closer.

"What's the matter? Something up with Diamond Tiara?" Rainbow asks seriously. She clearly recognizes that something is wrong, since Filthy Rich isn't really the kind to act like this.

"Yes! She...well, we fought, and while I was out, she went...oh Celestia...she went into the Everfree Forest!" Filthy Rich's words cause my eyebrow to shoot up, and Rainbow to gasp in horror.

"Whelp, she's dead," I remark callously. Rainbow nudges me hard at that one. I look at her bitterly. I'm just telling it like it is.

"Why would she do that?!" Rainbow asks in shock. Filthy Rich lets his head rest into his hooves, as if ashamed.

"The note she left...she said she felt useless, because all she can do is make jewelry, and relies on me to get the materials she needed." Filthy Rich begins. "One of the most vital materials she needs is only found in the Everfree. I usually pay the guard to retrieve it for her, but she wants to prove she can do things on her own, without me."

"Dumb bitch," I remark. That only earns me another glare from Rainbow for my insensitivity. "Looks like she's gonna get herself killed."

"Mr. Rogers, please. There's monsters in that forest, some of which are too strong for even unicorns like Miss Sparkle to fight," Filthy Rich pleads. He looks at my rifle. "If you can use your human weapon, you could save my daughter easily."

"That's not happening," I tell him flatly. There's the part where it's out of ammo, but I'd rather he think I'm just an asshole. His face quickly becomes distraught.

"Please! She means the world to me!" Wow, Filthy Rich is actually begging me. Yeah well, there's no fucking way I'm going in that forest again.

"That's not my problem. If she's dumb enough to get herself killed, that's her fault," I rebuff him coldly. This time, Rainbow gets in my face.

"Seth! That's enough. This is a pony's life we're talking about! It doesn't matter what you think of them. All life is precious!" she snaps at me.

"Like I care! Diamond Tiara is scum, a waste of space. There's no way I'm risking my life for somepony like that!" I yell back at her. Rainbow doesn't back off either, staying true to her brash nature.

"I didn't like you all that much when I first met you, but I saved you anyway! Whether they're a good pony or not, they don't deserve to die. Not when we can do something about it!"

"I'm NOT going back in that fucking forest, you hear me?! There's nothing short of a damn miracle that'll make me even consider it! You can shove your self righteous bullshit up your ass and quit thinking I have any obligation to help you!" I roar at her. Suddenly, Rainbow's hoof slams into my face, causing me to recoil and hold the affected spot. "What the..."

"Fine! I don't like Diamond Tiara either, and yet I'm going to go save her. You just stand there and be the kind of monster who'll let a young filly die!" Rainbow shouts, utterly furious with me. Then, she looks down at Filthy Rich, who looks frightened by our argument. "Come on, Mr. Rich. I'll save your daughter, since the only thing my friend here cares about is himself."

"Thank you so much, Miss Dash. You truly are a hero!" Filthy Rich says gratefully, and then the two of them speed away, heading directly towards the Everfree Forest.

I'm left alone, watching them go, still angry and incredulous. Like I was really going to go out of my way to save a bitch like his daughter, especially after what you tried to do to me. "Fuck this...I'm going home," I grumble, walking back into the town.

* * *

I walk into the house, noticing Vinyl sitting at the couch and a fire roaring in the fireplace, filling the room up with warmth. She looks up as I dust the snow off of myself, and then remove my jacket and hang it on a hook next to the door. "Welcome back, bro. You're back pretty early."

"Yeah," I respond shortly. Vinyl knows instantly that something is wrong, judging by that look she's giving me.

"Yo, come sit by the fire. I'll fix you some tea," Vinyl invites, waving me over with a hoof. I shrug and sit on the couch next to her, enjoying the warmth coming from the fire.

"Tea sounds good," I say softly, staring at the flame. I lay back and relax, feeling a lot better now that I can get warm. When Vinyl returns with the tea a few minutes later, I feel even better, since this tea is pretty good.

It doesn't last. For some reason, I start getting restless. I don't know what's wrong, but I just can't get settled. It's like that feeling you get when you're putting something off. Like you know there's something you have to do, but you're just not acknowledging it. That doesn't make sense to me though. I have nothing to do. This evening is mine to spend on my own.

I don't realize I'd zoned out until Vinyl waves a hoof in my face. "You okay there? What's up?"

"Nothing really. Just Rainbow being a dipshit," I answer, drinking some more of the tea. "She went to the Everfree with Filthy Rich to save his bitchy daughter."

Vinyl promptly spits out the tea she's drinking. "WHAT?! Into the Everfree?!" she exclaims in shock. "That's crazy! That place is really dangerous!"

"Trust me, I know. Those timberwolves really wanted to eat me," I comment, remembering how I'd been chased by a whole pack. Vinyl shakes her head.

"Timberwolves? Nah, dude, that's the least of their worries. That place is suffused with dangerous magic, and that's not the worst. Then you got monsters like the Ursa Major and the Scorpios," Vinyl corrects me. I blink.

"Those...are constellations. Are you trying to tell me that constellations attack ponies?"

"Not really. They're monsters that draw power from those constellations. They're too strong for any normal pony to handle," she explains. Well, that sounds unbelievable. And dumb. Monsters drawing power from constellations. Those stars are millions of fucking light years away. How can they POSSIBLY gain energy from them? Let me guess: magic. Fucking magic. "I mean, I doubt Rainbow will run into the Ursa Major. It's generally docile unless provoked. The Scorpios, however, she's dead if she runs into that thing."

A shudder involuntarily passes through me. I can't even imagine what monsters like that would even look like. My thoughts turn to Rainbow for some reason. I try to stop thinking about her, but it's hard not to. What's the big deal about her? So what if she dies? Then she'll get off my case forever. Maybe then I can live without being pestered every damn moment about being an asshole.

But...a part of me feels empty at the thought that Rainbow Dash might be dead by the end of the day. I mean, ever since she saved me from suicide, she's been by my side practically every moment of every day. She's been inviting me to go places, cheering me up when I needed it, and having little moments of banter with me that make me smile to think about. Am I really okay with losing all of that?

"Hello? Equestria to Seth!" Vinyl yells in my face. I jump in surprise, having zoned out again. "You keep getting lost in your thoughts. What's up?"

"Nothing, dammit!" I snap. I told her enough. There's no way I'm letting her in on these thoughts I'm having. I don't even really understand them. I feel anxious, and I don't know why. No matter what I do, I just can't relax. The fact that Rainbow could die doesn't bother me. It shouldn't bother me.

"Dude...go after her. You're clearly worried about her," Vinyl urges me, seeing through my outburst for what it truly was, resting a hoof on my back reassuringly. I shrug her hoof away uncomfortably. Am I worrying about her?

"No way. I'm not going anywhere. It was her choice to go into that forest. It shouldn't concern me," I refuse flatly. Vinyl sighs.

"Who are you trying to convince? You look like crap, bro. It's only going to get worse if you don't do something about it," Vinyl points out. Damn, these ponies are more perceptive than they have any right to be.

I try to form a protest, but I have to admit, she's right. I should have gone with her. I'm ashamed to acknowledge this weakness I'm feeling. I have no reason to care about Rainbow, but I do anyway.

Vinyl steps back as I rise to my feet without warning. "You're right Vinyl. I won't feel right until she's back here being annoying again," I express with determination in my voice. Vinyl finally smiles widely. "I'm leaving. Wish me luck."

"You got it. You just go in, get her, and come back out. I'll contact the guard in the meantime," she tells me. "No heroics, you hear me? That forest is not safe."

With a nod, I put on my jacket and rush back out into the cold. Rainbow Dash saved my life once. It's time for me to save hers.

Because that's what friends do.

* * *

I run through the streets, earning curious looks from everypony that I pass. They're probably wondering why the human, who is always yelling and looking bored, is giving it his all to get through the town. I pass several ponies that I know, but I don't even spare them a glance as I continue on.

Yes, Rainbow Dash is my friend, as much as it pains me to admit it. As egotistical and annoying as she is, she kept true to her word. No matter how much I snapped at her, no matter how much I try to physically harm her, she never left me. It's time for me to return the favor.

But, if I admit that Rainbow is my friend, then I have to also say that Apple Bloom is also my friend. That childlike innocence of her reminds me of myself, so long ago. No matter what she sees from me, she's always being kind and happy, seeking me out on her own initiative just so that she could spend some time with me.

It's time for me to give back to these two what they've given to me. Yes, there's a possibility I can lose them too, just like Amaryllis and Adam, but there's a difference this time. I _won't_ let it happen. I'll keep them safe with my own two hands. The pressure that I've been feeling in my chest returns with a vengeance, stronger than ever before.

I leave the town behind, pushing past whatever fatigue I'm starting to feel, until I finally reach the edge of the Everfree. I hesitate, staring at the ominous twisted branches of the forest. This is probably the least intelligent thing I've done since getting here. I take a breath, and then I plunge into the hellish forest. Darkness falls over me like a blanket, as the canopy is so thick with branches and foliage that hardly any light can pierce it.

"Rainbow!" I call out as I follow the path. I'm not fooling myself. The chances of me coming across them in this massive ass forest are slim to none. But if Diamond Tiara had even a lick of sense, she'd have stayed on the path. I'm going to bet on that, since if she strayed, she's as good as dead. It doesn't matter how long it takes me, though. I'm not leaving this forest without Rainbow. "Where the hell are you?!"

I skid to a stop, noticing a lone timberwolf in the middle of the path that is dragging the corpse of a deer off into the thick of the woods. My yelling attracts its attention. It lifts its wooden head and gazes at me with those ominous green eyes. Its hackles rise, and its eyes narrow. I bet it thinks its going to get two meals for the price of one. I stare back at it, determination stamped upon my face. I un-sling my rifle from my back. "You think you'll get between me and my friend?"

The wolf snarls, and then it lunges. Thankfully, I'm nowhere near as panicked as I was the first time I saw one. I'm not going to pussy out like I did that time. This thing is going down. Concentrate Seth. Watch its movement carefully. It's aiming for my left shoulder.

I sidestep its lunge to the right and bring my rifle down on its back with a double-handed strike, knocking it flat on the ground. Then, I finish it off by slamming my foot right down on the back of its neck, breaking through several layers of wood and decapitating it. "Think again," I finish with a snarl.

I move on, confident in my ability to handle anything this damn forest can throw at me. I'm no longer worried about my own survival. There's something greater than me out there. Rainbow has managed to do the impossible: befriending me. Once that happens...on that rare occasion...there's nothing I won't do for you. Like Adam...or Amaryllis, I won't stop until you're safe and happy.

I even pass Zecora's house as I travel through the forest, but I don't stop to sight see. I continuously call out for Rainbow, hoping that she'll answer.

A few moments later, I become aware of a commotion occurring deeper in the forest. There's a cacophonous rustling and crashing coming from somewhere off of the path. And...was that a hiss? What the...whelp. This is probably a dumb idea, but I have to be sure.

"Rainbow?" I call, hoping that my voice won't piss off whatever it is making those noises. My gamble pays off, because I hear Rainbow answer me.

"Seth? What are you...? No, don't come any closer!" her voice cries out. Seconds later, I hear a horrendous screeching, like something you'd hear in an Alien movie.

Ignoring her warnings, I force my way through the thick trees until I emerge into a clearing, and I immediately spot Rainbow. However, it's what's with her that freaks me the fuck out. "What in the nine hells and the three mouths of Lucifer is _that?!_" I gasp as I look at one of the scariest fucking things I've ever seen in my life.

A large monster that's about twice my height and many times longer is menacing Rainbow from the center of the clearing. It looks to be a cross between a spider and a scorpion, in that it has eight eyes on its bulbous black head and two powerful looking pincers, and it has eight legs as well, but it also has a long segmented tail with a vicious looking stinger on the end that dripped with venom.

Rainbow is the only thing standing between it and a cowering Diamond Tiara, who is standing above the unconscious form of her father. Rainbow is covered with cuts and bruises, telling me that she'd been fighting this thing for who knows how long.

"Get back, Seth! This thing is a Scorpios! It's not to be taken lightly!" Rainbow shouts at me, taking her eyes off of the monster to look at me. Wait, a Scorpios? Isn't that the thing Vinyl said...shit. To my alarm, I see the monster raise one of its legs, taking advantage of her inattention.

"RAINBOW!" I try to warn her, but the leg swings down and smacks her aside like a rag doll. Rainbow hits the trunk of a tree painfully, and I wince when I see her wing bend at an awkward angle. "Dammit!"

"Seth...take them and run..." Rainbow tells me weakly as she crawls back towards the Scorpios as it moves to make a meal out of the filly and her father. She lifts herself back up and rams the monster's side, causing it to hiss and focus its attention on her. Okay, no, this stops now.

Rainbow watches the Scorpios lift its leg one more time, only this time it will probably mean the end for her. Except that's not happening. The monster shrieks as there's suddenly a human on its back. Yeah, that's right you fucker. Seth Rogers is here, and I'm going to make you pay.

I find a spot between the segmented plates on its back, and then I jam the tip of my rifle into it and twist. The monster screeches in pain, so I think I did something right. Or I irritated it. Probably the latter. Suddenly I realize I'm forgetting something. "OH SH-" I don't have enough time to complete my expletive before I'm forced to throw myself to the ground to avoid the Scorpios's stinger.

The monster wastes no time in taking advantage of my vulnerability. It skitters towards me and slams its leg down. I manage to dodge it by rolling out of the way. Retaliating with a smack of my rifle to its leg, I hope to do some real damage, but the Scorpios's leg doesn't even budge. "Seth!" Rainbow calls, and I have the presence of mind to dash aside, just as its stinger flies down.

It's too fast for me though. It intercepts me and grabs me with its two front legs. I struggle, but I can't break its grip. There's these barbed hair looking things on its legs that are hooked into my clothes and won't let me free. Oh shit...it's lowering me towards its mouth, isn't it. I'm about to get eaten alive by a damn scorpion thing.

Suddenly, the monster hurls me aside as Rainbow rams her head just beneath its jaws. I tumble end over end, accumulating many scrapes and cuts in the process. My body aches as I lift my head to see Rainbow being knocked aside like nothing once again. This time, the Scorpios goes in for the kill, and I'm just not close enough to stop it.

"Dammit, no!" I shout helplessly as the monster approaches the helpless Rainbow. It's going to kill her right in front of me. I'm about to lose another one of my friends, just after realizing that I had one. This isn't fucking fair! Why must this goddamn world take everything from me!? The pressure in my chest intensifies, and I can feel it shifting like when I'd confronted Diamond Tiara, like it's trying to get loose.

Why is this happening? If I had gone with her...maybe this wouldn't be happening. Maybe we'd have gotten to Diamond and gotten out before this fucker had showed up. But...now, I had to be stubborn, and get all hung up on the fact that it's Diamond we're trying to save. Because of that, Rainbow is going to die.

Am I really going to lie here and let this happen? My muscles...they won't listen to me. Move, body. Move! Your friend is going to die!

Slowly, I rise, a strange lethargic feeling passing over me. My vision wavers a bit, and I nearly unbalance, but I manage to stagger to my feet. "I won't let this happen," I growl, the pressure in my chest almost unbearable. "Not now, not ever. I won't..."

The pressure shifts again, and this time...I stop subconsciously holding it back. I let go, and everything changes. Now, I don't remember much about what happens next. It was like the whole thing was a blur. However, I'm going to state as much as I can, with outside accounts piecing together what I don't remember.

Something roars around me, and it's not the monster. The air in front of me turns darker, and starts to shimmer and distort, almost as if I was viewing everything in front of me through a translucent dark flame. My eyes...my vision flashes lime green several times, and then it stays like that. I can even see every individual vein in my eyes as red jagged lines. The edges of my vision flare purple. I can't really explain it, but I can feel so much death. From the ground, I can feel places where living creatures have died, like another sense.

I look down at my hand, and for some reason, there's a dark energy surrounding it, with sparks of green lightning emanating from it. What is this? Heh, I don't care. I don't fucking care. All I know is that I feel powerful, and it feels _good._

The Scorpios reaches Rainbow, and one of its legs rises up for the killing blow. My eyes snap to it, and it seems like it's happening in slow motion. I can feel several currents in the air, almost as if I'm standing in the middle of a calm hurricane. I don't even feel in control of my body as I pick one of them that's directed towards the Scorpios, and then I tug upon it.

The ground cracks and ruptures around my feet, and then my vision blurs as I'm suddenly transported at a ridiculous speed to directly in front of the Scorpios. Without flinching, I block the monster's leg with my forearm. The force of impact practically causes a shockwave to emanate from the collision. My eyes narrow. "I won't lose any more of my friends," I tell it calmly, even though I know it can't understand me. I slowly reach up and grasp its leg with my free hand. "I'll be taking this."

Without putting more than a paltry amount of effort into it, I rip away its leg entirely from its body. The monster's screech deafens me as it scuttles back, ichor spurting from the stump where its leg used to be.

I grab hold of another one of those odd currents so that I appear directly in front of it once more. "Did I say you could run, you insect?!" My voice rises in pitch slightly, becoming almost maniacal. I can't help but laugh crazily as the Scorpios attempts to defend itself. I duck another another of its legs with ease, knock another away with a hand, and then I punch it directly in the face, that dark energy rippling around that arm. All of that energy rushes forward upon impact, burning away the monster's face and rendering useless several of its eyes.

In retaliation the Scorpios brings its stinger to bear, the weapon shooting forward in an attempt to impale me through the middle. My right hand snaps up and grabs the tail just under the base of the stinger. "I'm going to make you suffer," I promise it, a twisted grin forming on my face. My eyes grow wider and my pupils smaller, making me look truly crazed. My right hand closes tightly, crushing the creature's tail with my new power. The stinger falls to the ground, useless, as the monster screams out its pain, pulling the tail back and attempting to whip me with it.

A current takes me high above its head, and then another shoots me right back down, where I drive my dark flaming elbow into its back, cracking the carapace. I then grab the monster's tail when it tries to hit me with it again, hop off of it onto the ground, and then use my new strength to fling the monster clear across the clearing into a tree, like it weighed nothing.

I hear Diamond Tiara scream as the Scorpios hits the tree, but I could care less. I even ignore Rainbow as she stares at me in awe, my mind instead focusing on what degree of pain I can inflict upon this monster.

I don't know what comes over me, but it just feels right to grab my rifle. Just that simple action causes dark energy to arc down my arm and course through the weapon. I aim it steadily at the rising Scorpios, lining up a shot through the sights. I know it doesn't have any ammo, but the part of me that cares is far from being heard right now. It's so much easier just to let the darkness take over.

The monster sees me pointing the rifle at it. It gives one last defiant screech before I pull the trigger. With a sound like thunder, a thick beam of pure darkness ringed by green electricity fires from the muzzle of the gun and collides with the Scorpios. The energy explodes on impact, wreaking destruction on the landscape and sending up a cloud of dust to conceal the monster from view. I'm not done there.

I squeeze the trigger over and over again, firing more and more beams of destruction from the rifle, slamming into the Scorpios over and over again. The whole time I laugh like a madman, finding a sick pleasure in watching the creature that wronged me die painfully. "Get fucked, you son of a bitch!" I cry with elation, firing one last beam of darkness into the large dust cloud.

I sling the rifle on my back once more, and then I stride through the dust until I find the perforated corpse of the Scorpios. I look down at its scorched face. "Who said you could die!?" I scream at it insanely. I kneel down and slam a darkness covered fist into its face, cracking the ground and burning the skin almost to nothingness. I punch it over and over again, breaking what's left of its body into bloody bits. Still, even as the ground shatters beneath the force of every punch, not even this is enough for me."I'm not satisfied!"

"Seth?" Rainbow calls to me, her voice weak. I freeze, remembering why it was I'd given in to this power in the first place. As I walk towards her, I think...why should I give this up? I have the power to do anything I want now. I'll teach everypony here that's wronged me a lesson in pain. Filthy Rich? You're beyond dead. Diamond Tiara? You're going to join him. And...why...does it hurt?

I stumble out of the dust cloud and fall on my knees. My entire body is hurting...it's like the darkness swirling around me is eating me away on the inside. "Ow...fuck...stop..." I moan.

"Seth! Can you hear me?" Rainbow is crawling over to me, despite how hurt she is. "What's wrong?"

"Rainbow...this power...it really hurts," I manage to get out. I was wrecking shit just a minute ago...so why is it so hard to even move now? Something catches in my throat, and I cough violently. To my horror, blood spatters from my mouth to the ground. Is this power going to kill me?

"Hang in there, Seth! You should be controlling that magic, not the other way around," Rainbow assures me. She forces herself to her hooves and boldly approaches me. The darkness swirling around me doesn't hurt her, so she rests a hoof on my back. Her presence does wonders for my state of mind. Ignoring the pain, I try and find the source of this power. It doesn't take me long. It feels like there's a river passing through that area on the center of my chest, where the pressure had once been. "You saved us, Seth. You don't need to exert yourself any longer."

She's right. It's over. With a great deal of effort, I manage to stop the flow of energy that's passing through my chest or whatever, and then the darkness around me fades away to nothing, and my vision returns to normal. My body still feels like it has been hit by a semi truck, but at least now I'm not coughing up blood.

Suddenly, it hits me. What the fuck just happened? I look between the relieved face of Rainbow, and then to the corpse of the Scorpios. Did I do that? How the fuck did I get the power to beat that monster? Where did that dark energy come from?

I start hyperventilating. This shouldn't be possible. Humans can't access that kind of power. Like, ever. No matter how strong you are, humans have limits that we can't bypass, and that's why we create guns, tanks, and planes. So how come I was able to toss aside human limits like they were nothing?

I open my hands, checking them for damage. They are in relatively good shape. Which is impossible. The laws of physics don't work that way. Hitting that monster with a punch strong enough to actually hurt it should have broken my hands from the reactive force, and yet my hands are fine. This world does have consistency, though, in that if something breaks the laws of physics, magic is involved. But that means...

"I just fucking used magic," I say aloud in an incredulous tone. "How fucking surreal is that?"

I hear no response from Rainbow. Looking down in alarm, I see that she'd passed out. Fuck she's actually hurt. I need to get her back to the town, so she can get those wounds treated. I need to do the same. Who knows how much internal damage that magic inflicted on me?

"Come here," I say to Rainbow, even though she can't hear me. I reach down and lift her up, draping her front hooves over my shoulder and standing up. She's heavy...but the lingering adrenaline gives me the strength to carry her. I move over to Diamond Tiara next. She looks up at me with wide, frightened eyes. "You too...get the fuck over here."

"You...you were right. I can't do anything on my own," Diamond laments, causing me to give her a scornful glance.

"Shut the fuck up," I snap at her, not caring in the least about her mental state. I reach down with my free hand and lifting her by the scruff of her neck. She squeaks, thinking I'm going to hurt her, but instead I just place her on my other shoulder. "Hang on there. I got to deal with your pain in the ass father next."

Diamond Tiara obediently wraps her hooves around my neck and lets herself hang down my back. That way I have enough space to lift Filthy Rich up as well, and carry him on my other shoulder like I am Rainbow. He's just as heavy, if not more so, than Rainbow, so it takes all of my strength and willpower not to fall over.

Now that I have all of them, I walk slowly back through the forest, leaving the dead Scorpios behind. The minutes blend together as I focus not on the path, but just on putting one foot in front of the other. I'm not sure if I'll be able to make it out, but there's no way I'm going to let Rainbow die in this godforsaken forest.

My strength soon starts to falter as the adrenaline leaves my system. It seems like the three on my back get exponentially heavier, and I almost collapse.

Finally, my legs give out, and I fall to the ground, my strength depleted. Just before I lose consciousness, I can see several armored ponies rushing towards us in the distance. One of them sees me, and he points a hoof at me, shouting something to the others. I wonder if they're real, or if I'm just delirious. Seeing as I can't possibly have magic, I wouldn't be surprised if this is all just some feverish dream.

Soon, they're surrounding us. My tired mind can't make out anything they're saying, so I stop trying. Instead, I feel myself slipping away into unconsciousness, my pain fading.

Did I succeed? Or am I once again going to lose that which I've only now discovered to be dear?

* * *

I took longer on this chapter mostly because of how much content had to go in it, plus after I finished it, I wasn't and I'm still not all that satisfied with it. Then again, this entire thing is literally just my first draft, since I'm doing this without a beta reader. I'll go back and edit all this once the story is over. Especially this one.

But, I've been planning this bit with Seth and magic since the beginning of the story. Some of you have expressed hopes that this wouldn't happen (in which case I'm sorry you're disappointed), while others have downright called it. You know who you are ;P

Arc 2 is not quite finished. I have maybe one last chapter for wrap up, and then we'll move on to Arc 3. Which will probably be more slice of life, but I doubt that'll be a problem, seeing as you came this far. But it won't be pointless, as it'll be setting the stage for Arc 4, which I'm hoping will be one of the best. After all, fight scenes are my specialty. This whole story is something completely different for me, as I'm focusing more on character development than fighting. Just look at my Golden Sun story on this site. 7000 word fight scene. ^^

All right, I think I'm done ranting. Please leave a comment, since if any chapter needs feedback, it's this one.


	19. Seth's Friends

Everything is pain. That's all I can feel, even as awareness returns to me. Let me just go through a diagnostic here: so my head is hurting like a bitch, my throat is sore, my ribs are aching something fierce, I can feel multiple surface wounds on my arms and legs, and then lastly it feels like there's acid in my stomach. Wait, there's always acid in my stomach. Fucking...so like normal, only I can feel it.

I become aware of a steady beeping sound, as well as a persistent pinching sensation on the inside of my elbow. I've felt something like this before...so I must be in a hospital. Oh dear, my mother must be worried sick. I wonder if Amaryllis is here yet. She was there last time I had surgery.

I open my eyes, and the sight of a white ceiling greets me. Yep, white. I'm definitely in a hospital. I can't seem to remember why I'm here, though. Did I get a concussion? Because that would explain my lack of memory and my aching head.

A soft pillow cradles my head, and soft sheets are covering me up to my waist. That draws attention to the fact I'm wearing a simple piece of cloth. It feels heavenly. I shift my head, wincing at the pain, in an attempt to get a better look at my surroundings.

The first thing I see is a fucking white pony wearing a nurse outfit sitting on its haunches near the door, . And then my memory comes back. I groan, resisting the urge to rub my forehead. Right, right, I'm in a world filled with stupid talking ponies.

"Oh, you're awake! How are you feeling..." the nurse pony exclaims after hearing my voice. She looks down at a clipboard she's carrying. "Mr. Rogers?"

I ignore her at first as more of memory comes back. Right, lots of things have changed. I...have a friend, one that I used some crazy ass magic to save. I still don't know how I did that, nor exactly what happened. That memory is just a blur filled with explosions, darkness, and rage.

"Sir?" the nurse prompts, much to my annoyance.

"Shut up and let me think a moment," I snap at her. She recoils, taken aback by my sudden vehemence. Suddenly...I remember something. "Where's Rainbow?"

"Miss Dash? She's in the bed next to you," the nurse tells me, still looking hurt at my callous words.

I almost freak out, thinking that she meant Rainbow was literally in the bed with me, but after a bit of looking around, I notice not only the IV stuck into my arm (which makes me wonder how long I've been unconscious), but also that there's another bed, a few feet away from my own. Rainbow is fast asleep upon it, lying on her side. Her wounds are bandaged and her hurt wing is in a cast, but she's not hooked up to an IV like I am.

"How long was I out?" I feel obligated to ask.

"Three days, sir," the nurse responded helpfully. I wince at that figure. Well, that explains why I needed an IV.

"Shit. What all was wrong with me?"

"Unfortunately, we don't know much about human anatomy apart from what we've learned from the findings of archaeologists, so I can't give you an exact answer."

"I figured as much. Do the best you can." I should hope not. Even humans themselves didn't know everything about our own bodies. Like, for example, what the fucking appendix does. So there's a problem if she could tell me everything.

The nurse swallows nervously. "Okay. First and foremost are the multiple surface lacerations, and contusions, possibly caused by your encounter with the Scorpios."

"Wait, how the fuck do you know what I fought?" I demand.

"Mr. Rich and his daughter both gave their statements to the town guard. It seems you four went through quite the ordeal. I can't even imagine what it was like." Now the nurse is wearing a sympathetic expression. You're right. You can't. I can hardly imagine it myself, since everything is still a little fuzzy.

"Why does medical have that kind of information? Shouldn't incident reports be classified?" I question. I wonder if their police departments are anything like our own. The nurse blinks, nonplussed.

"Why would they be? It's everypony's right to know what happens around them. Besides, how are we supposed to properly treat you unless we know the cause of your injuries?"

"A fair point. Guess your political structure is less shady than I expected," I admit. If something like the Scorpios had attacked a rural town like this one in my world, chances are it would have killed everyone, and then the government would cover it up to prevent widespread panic. You know, instead of recognizing their right to information and then setting up contingency plans to reassure civilians in the case of repeat attacks. The nurse looks like she's about to ask me about that, but I don't feel like explaining it, so I cut her off. "Now, what else did you find wrong?"

"Our X-Rays also picked up several fractured ribs, which we've since set. They should be healing nicely, provided you don't move around very much for a few hours," she continues.

"Okay, stop right there. I have broken ribs, and you're telling me they've already healed? It's only been three days!" That's just bullshit. Not to mention they have X-Rays? If that's the case, then they have computers. Or are they getting results through other means? Wait, no, I'm hooked up to a heart monitor. That in and of itself is a computer. So then why doesn't Ponyville have them?

"Well, of course. Broken limbs aren't that much of an issue. It just requires a little magical expertise to set them, and jump start the healing process," the nurse responds like it was no big deal.

"So...magic?"

"That's right."

"Everything's done by magic. Fucking magic," I groan to myself, and I rub my forehead in exasperation. "What about my internal injuries? I know I must have had some."

"Like I said, sir, we don't know anything about your internal make-up. So we did the best we could with special ointments that promote healing."

"That's some of the biggest bullshit I've heard so far," I snap. "I distinctly remember spitting up blood when I was in that forest. You're not even going to try and look for the source?"

The nurse has the decency to look chastened at my words "I...I'm sorry, but we can't risk performing surgery on a complete unknown like yourself. Not without further study."

"Which isn't happening."

"Which can't be done without your consent, according to Equestrian law" the nurse agrees. So there's actually a law that says you can't cut someone open because you don't understand them. One more thing about this time that's better than my own. I'd still trade it all away to see my family and friend one last time.

"Good. What about Rainbow? How bad is she?"

"Her injuries were more severe than your own. According to Mr. Rich, Rainbow fought the Scorpios for at least half an hour before you arrived," the nurse explains.

My eyes widen at that. Holy shit. I look back at Rainbow, a whole new respect for her blossoming within me. She fought that thing off for that long? Thirty minutes while in combat is a long time. Sure, she can fly, but to protect Diamond Tiara and Filthy Rich, she'd have had to stay on the ground to keep the Scorpios from ignoring her and killing them. Rainbow Dash. What a fucking badass.

"Besides the expected external injuries, like your own, she suffered fractures in her back leg, right wing, and several ribs. They're well on their way to healing now, however." The nurse then proceeds to smile, despite my jaw dropping at how hurt she was. If I hadn't shown up when I had...she'd be beyond dead. "You did well, saving her. She's well liked by the townspeople. It would have been an unspeakable tragedy if...the unthinkable had happened."

"Right, whatever." I dismiss her praise uncomfortably. Honestly, I should be dead too, by all rights. I only made it through that because I apparently have bullshit magical powers of self-injuring convenience that came out of nowhere. I wonder what the explanation for that is. "Has she been out for three days like me?"

"No, she's been awake several times before now. It's just been you," the nurse answers. That's odd. Well, then again, not really. If I go by the things I've heard from magic through fantasy, it's not often that overuse of magic causes physical exhaustion in the caster. So if I assume that happened, that explains why I was unconscious for so long.

"So I could technically wake her up without causing any health problems?" I ask. I'm feeling a bit mischievous, now that I now she's all right. The nurse nods. I turn my head, to look back at Rainbow. "Oi! Wake the fuck up!"

Rainbow wakes with a start. "Waah! Where's the fire?!" she exclaims, but once the sleep leaves her eyes, she becomes aware of me laughing at her reaction. "Oh, you're awake at last!"

"I could say the same to you. But yeah, I'm up, for better or worse."

"How are you holding up? I don't got a clue what the doctors meant with all their fancy words, but I heard it was bad."

"I should be asking you that. Your injuries are worse than mine." I point out. Rainbow laughs sheepishly at that. "But I'm fine, somewhat."

"Me too. But...why didn't you tell us you can use magic? That was totally awesome, what you did back there!" Well, of course she probably has lots of questions, seeing as I essentially curbstomped what was considered to be one of the toughest monsters in the forest.

"Because I didn't know either. Back in my time, humans can't use magic, no matter how much they want to. It's why we came up with so many technological marvels, some of which you ponies are using now."

"Huh? Then why are you able to use magic now?" Rainbow looks about as confused as I feel about this whole situation.

"Your guess is as good as mine. Besides, it's a moot point. I don't plan on using it ever again." Now that gets a reaction from Rainbow.

"What?! Why not? You saved our lives, Seth," Rainbow protests hotly. Before responding, I look over at the nurse.

"Mind leaving us for a bit?" I ask her. Now's as good a time as any to have this conversation, and I'd rather do in private. I'd rather everypony else continue believing I'm an asshole, since I'm still convinced most of the ponies are worthless. With the exception of Rainbow and Apple Bloom. And maybe Vinyl, since it was she that helped me realize who my friends are.

"Oh, of course. Just call if you need anything," she answers agreeably, and then she leaves the room, shutting the door behind her. That just leaves Rainbow and I.

"Well, now that she's gone. Basically, I can't remember a damn thing between seeing that thing attack you, and then me falling over next to its dead body, coughing up blood," I confess to her. I'm mostly honest. I do remember little flashes, but mostly just explosions and the feeling of intense hatred.

"What does that matter? You beat the crap out of that thing!" Rainbow looks like she honestly can't understand.

"Putting aside the fact that this magic almost killed me after using it, I wasn't in control of myself when I was supposedly using it! What if I'd killed one of you?"

"I guess you have a point...but I thought you didn't care if we lived or died?" Now Rainbow looks bitter, remembering our argument just before she left for the forest. She's partially right. I still don't give a shit what happens to Diamond Tiara and Filthy Rich, since they're scum. She's the one that's different.

"I mostly don't...but you're the exception in this case. I didn't go back into that forest to save that bitch and her father. I went there to make sure you didn't get your stupid ass killed." Shit, I practically just admitted that I somewhat care about her. I mean, she probably knows since I killed a monster to save her, but it still makes me feel weak to say it aloud. Once you've gotten by on your own long enough, admitting that you feel something that's not hate for another individual feels like weakness. Like right now.

"I suppose that makes sense," Rainbow responds, causing me to look at her in surprise. Is she really not going to say anythi...and there's the double take. "Hey, uh, you want to run that by me one more time?"

"Don't make me say it again..." I groan, turning away. I can't bear for her to look at me right now.

"So...does that mean I wasn't going crazy when I heard you call me a friend?" Rainbow looks so hopeful right now. I'm already starting to regret this. No doubt she's going to stick to me even harder if I say yes...but I can't exactly lie. Even if I do, there's no way she'd believe me after I risked my life for her.

"...You is all I can say. I immediately curse myself at how dumb that sounded. Why couldn't I have just said yes? That would have sounded less stupid. Then again, I don't think it matters.

"Yea-heah, WHOO!" Rainbow's exultant whoop is accompanied by her attempting to move, which causes her to immediately wince and settle down. "Ow, ow, bad idea."

"Pfft, dumbass," I quip. Her response is to stick her tongue out at me. "As mature as ever, I see."

"Eeh, I'm awesome and you know it," Rainbow boasts in response, laying back on the bed. "This is totally great. I gotta show you so many things. Oh wow, I know, you need to come see the Wonderbolts with me. You'll love them, I promise you! Oh, and then there's this totally awesome book series I have to..."

"Ugh, shut up Rainbow. Too much at once," I grunt, wondering what I just signed myself up for. "I'm not going to suddenly make an about face in my personality simply because I find you one of the only tolerable ponies ever. I still find this world to be fucked up."

"Oh, sorry. I'm just excited," Rainbow says sheepishly, rubbing the back of her head with a hoof. Then she does another double take. "Wait, 'one of the only?' Are there more?"

"Just one. Apple Bloom," I admit. Rainbow actually doesn't look all that surprised at that.

"About time you realized that. I've seen you two together. That filly really likes you," she teases me.

"Gee, I couldn't tell, seeing how she fucking glomps me every time I see her," I shoot back sarcastically.

"Uh...glomp?"

"Human phrase. Skip it." I get the feeling that Rainbow would break my neck if she tried glomping me. Yet...the image of the tomboyish Rainbow glomping anyone is enough to amuse me. Come to think of it, she's the only pony I've met that hasn't tried to hug me. Which I appreciate.

"Excuse me," the nurse says, poking her head back in. We both look at her attentively. "Sorry to interrupt, but your friends are here to visit you."

"Rainbow, your friends are here," I promptly tell her with a wry expression. I can't think of any ponies that would have come to see me, after all.

"Thanks Nurse Redheart. You can send them in. We're good now," Rainbow answers the nurse, chuckling a bit at my words. Huh, so the nurse has a name. And it's Redheart. Could you have gone with anything less cliché? I mean...Redheart. Really? This world really enjoys giving ponies obvious names for their profession. Rainbow then turns to face me. "Brace yourself, Seth. I think all the girls might be here."

"Fucking wonderful...that probably means Pinkie too..."

"OHMIGOSH, DASHIE!" Almost the moment I open my fucking mouth, I hear her godforsaken voice, and then a pink blur zooms into the room. Pinkie immediately stops by a perplexed Rainbow and shoves a cupcake in her mouth. "YOU HAVE TO TRY THIS!"

Rainbow looks about as confused as I am. Pinkie literally just showed up and shoved a cupcake in an injured pony's mouth. I don't...this fucking pony.

Rainbow chews the cupcake slowly, her eyes widening. "Thishes good!" she remarks through a mouthful. "Shpishy."

I'm not even going to pretend I understood what she just said. Pinkie is bouncing in place excitedly.

"Pinkie darling, I must insist you wait! You don't want to risk making Seth..." Rarity walks into the room next, and then she cuts off when she sees me staring pointedly at Pinkie. "...angry."

So many damn ponies enter the room after that. After Rarity comes Applejack, Twilight, Vinyl, Lyra, and that Fluttershy. Huh, I've only met that last one once. What's her connection to Rainbow?

They all give us assorted greetings, but one voice in particular stands out to me because of how much louder it is. "Seth!" Hang on, I know that voice. I can't see her because she's so small, but I recognize that high pitched, twangy voice immediately. That soon changes, because Apple Bloom rushes around to the side of my bed, looking both worried and happy to see me. She rears up and places her front hooves on the edge of the bed, being to short to hop all the way up. "When ah heard ya were hurt...ah was worried ah wouldn't get ta see ya anymore."

Seriously. Weaponize this filly. I swear, she'd stop even the most hardened criminals with sheer adorableness. God, listen to me. I've never been one to really call something cute overmuch, but I've been doing it nonstop since I got here. Her tearful face is practically unbearable."Ugh...come here you." Apple Bloom squeaks as I grab her just under her front legs, lifting her clear off the ground and onto my lap. "I'm fine, see? As you long as you don't get too..ow!"

Before I can finish talking, Apple Bloom hugs me around the chest...where my ribs are still attempting to heal. So pain shoots through me, and I have to remove her legs from me physically. "...close to my ribs. Oh Jesus Christ that hurts."

"Apple Bloom, git down 'ere and quit hurtin' Seth," Applejack addresses her sister. Yeah, fuck you. If your sister wants to cuddle, it's totally fine.

"Aww, ah'm sorry, ah'll quit botherin' ya now." Apple Bloom says to me, looking worse than before. She moves to get down, but I stop her.

"Hey, I don't recall giving you permission to get down," I tell her. She gives me an odd expression, as does Applejack, but Apple Bloom's turns into a smile once she sees mine. She curls up in my lap.

"Uh...Seth, are you feeling all right?" Twilight asks me in a very surprised voice. By the way Applejack and Rarity are nodding, it seems they find this whole display of affection to be strange for me. Well, it is and it isn't. I've grown a bit attached to this filly. Stop fucking staring at me like that.

"Isn't that a dumb question to ask someone in the hospital?" I remark. Twilight blinks, and then huffs.

"I meant...ugh, you know. You're acting a bit...friendlier than usual, is all," Twilight corrects herself. Well, that's a dick way of putting it. Even if she's right. Don't worry, I still hate you.

"I can be nice to whoever I want. Why don't you mind your own fucking business?" And my response is just as nasty as her question was. Twilight doesn't look nearly as hurt by that as I expected. Instead, she heaves a sigh.

"And it's back," she laments. While she was talking, Rainbow swallows the cupcake, licking her muzzle to remove all the crumbs. She looks around at the different ponies.

"Hey everypony. Thanks for coming back to see me. I've been so bored for the past few days," Rainbow greets her friends.

"Well, fuck you too," I comment, though not really seriously. I'm just being a nitpicker to piss her off.

"Oh hush, mister 'I've been out for three days while my friend is sitting in a bed bored out of her mind!'" Rainbow contests, though she's about as serious as I am. Which is to say, not really.

"Well excuse me for exhausting myself dragging our sorry asses out of hell."

"OH!" Twilight's exclamation is enough to draw our attention from our stupid conversation. She rushes over to me, practically getting in my face. She looks more excited than I've ever seen her. "That reminds me! You can use magic!"

"No way, really?" I deadpan. Even my sarcasm isn't enough to dampen her spirits. She practically starts hopping up and down.

"Oh, this is so wonderful! I want to know everything about it! What color was it? What was its composition? What sort of techniques did you use? Oh, I know! We could practice magic together! I've been looking for a partner...we can do so many things together...and..."

"Twilight! Fucking shut it already!" I stop her mid rant. Twilight stops, looking sheepish, while Rainbow and Applejack chuckle knowingly at their friend's expense. "It's not that big of a deal."

"Oh, but it is!" Twilight starts up again, her eyes brightening. "This confirms the long standing theory that humanity had a basic understanding of magic. Though it was always assumed that human magic was more of the clairvoyant or informational kind, and not combat magic like you showed."

"Really? Huh, I wonder if humans used magic to make music, like I do?" Lyra muses, lifting up her lyre with a thoughtful expression.

"I bet they do. That stuff they call 'dubstep?' Just magical," Vinyl agrees, and then she and Lyra start having a conversation about music that I proceed to tune out, since the idea of humans using magic is just dumb.

"Actually, you're wrong." My words cut off all of their individual conversations. "Humans created all the technology that you're now using because we don't have magic. We were the apex race because of our ingenuity, not this overly convenient magic bullshit you unicorns get to have."

"Huh? But, if humans don't use magic, what about what you did?" Twilight asks, looking somewhat troubled at the condescending tone in my voice.

"Hell if I fucking know. It just sort of happened. I wouldn't even have believed it if I hadn't seen that monster's dead body myself," I admit. This magical power that I supposedly have still freaks me out. "Besides, it's dangerous to both me and my enemy."

"Oh? This is fascinating. What do you say you come back to my library so we can study it?" Twilight suggests.

"Absolutely not. There's no way I'm using that magic in a civilized area. I don't know if I can even control it," I snap. Twilight nods understandingly.

"I understand. But I do have a way of measuring any magical leakage any untrained unicorn generally exhibits. I think I might be able to tweak the device so that it can measure yours too. That way we can learn more about its composition, among other factors," she informs me.

Well...as much as I hate to admit it, this magic scares me. I've said this before, but I hardly remember a thing about what happened back there. That feeling of hatred haunts me. I don't know what state of mind I was in, but...I wonder. Would I have hurt Rainbow if I'd continued to use that magic? I don't even want to think about that.

So it is probably a good idea if I let Twilight study this magic. The more I know about it, the better chance I have of keeping it sealed. I don't ever want to use it again. "Fine. I'll come to the library so you can do whatever," I tell her, earning an immediate squee from her.

"Oh!" Pinkie appears to suddenly remember something. "I'm so glad you're okay Sethie, but I gotta get a few things done before tonight! Bye bye everypony!"

"Later, Pinkie!" Rainbow calls after the pink menace as she dashes out of the room. Then it hits me.

"What did I tell you about calling me Sethie?!" I shout in annoyance, but she's already gone. As I settle back with a sigh, I notice Lyra watching me with a pensive look on her face. "What?"

"So...Sethie, huh?" Oh you've got to be fucking kidding me.

"Don't even think about it," I growl at her.

"What a cute little name...I think I'll start using it." Lyra completely disregards my warning as she looks at me coyly.

"If you call me that even once, I'll eviscerate you with your own horn." The other ponies in the room flinch at my threat, but Lyra takes it in stride.

"Aww, such a cute little Sethie," she coos. You know, I'm starting to reconsider my refusal to ever use that magic again.

"Shut the hell up. What did you even come here for? To piss me off?!" I demand. Probably the only reason I'm not carrying out my previous threat is because of my healing ribs, and the pony in my lap.

Lyra's smirk is replaced by a small smile. "Of course not. I came to see if you're all right, that's all. I was worried."

"Bullshit..." I grunt. That's right. She still thinks she's my friend. Nope, sorry. I only have two friends, and you're not one of them.

"Same with me, bro," Vinyl adds, moving to stand beside Lyra. Even Rarity, Applejack, and apparently Sweetie Belle, who just now reveals her presence by hopping up on Rarity's back, nod their agreement.

"Do whatever you want, I guess. As you can see, I'm fine," I express, figuring that it would be easier not to protest over much. You can't really argue with a group, because they will never let you finish a thought.

"Nurse!" Nurse Redheart turns to face me when I called her name. "When can I get the hell out of here?"

"If you lie still for at least another hour, your bones should have enough time to fully heal. You'll both be released from the hospital then," Redheart answers, checking something off on her clipboard.

"Okay, and how much is this all going to cost me?" I have a sneaking suspicion that the hospital bills are going to completely drain whatever funds I have left. That's how it generally is in my world. It should be the same here...or maybe not, considering the appalled expression on Redheart's face.

"Cost you? For medical treatment? What a preposterous idea! What gave you the idea that we'd charge you for treatment?" She sounds genuinely shocked at the concept. That's...odd. There's no way this is free.

"I don't know, maybe because getting all the materials and equipment necessary to treat patients costs a shit ton of money? Hospitals can't stay in business without getting revenue from somewhere," I point out, somewhat sarcastically.

"Yes, but we'd never dream of taking it from patients. What if somepony was dying, and they didn't have the bits to pay our fees? We'd have to let them die, and that's just wrong."

"So...you're telling me you fix up anypony who comes in here, free of charge?" This is getting more ridiculous by the second. Medical equipment costs a hell of a lot. So where are they getting their money?

"That's right. It's our duty as citizens of Equestria, and as ponies." Redheart displays herself proudly at this statement. "To answer your previous question, both the costs of medical equipment and the wages of the employees are paid for by the princesses themselves."

So...Princess Celestia and Princess Luna managed to pull off what our president back in my time had been attempting for years. Yeah, our president offered free healthcare. You'd think accepting that would be a no-brainer, but then you get idiots saying shit like, "ERMAGERD, Communism!" and "Don't you force your policies on me!" Dumb fucks. I'll take something that's slightly socialistic if it means I don't have to spend hundreds of dollars to save my own life in the event of like, a heart attack or something. Anyhow, enough politics.

"Huh...that's another thing better about this time than my own," I express.

"Wow, your species is messed up," Rainbow stated.

"Tell me about it."

Now that that conversation is over, the other ponies in the room start taking their leave, since they don't want to stand around for an hour.

"Ah gotta head back to the farm. No work tomorrow, Seth. Ah'mma let ya take it easy," is Applejack's parting words. Wonderful, so no pay tomorrow. Fucking great. "Come along, Apple Bloom."

"Aww. Will ah see ya tomorrow, Seth?" Apple Bloom asks me, hopping down from the hospital bed.

"Hell if I know. Depends on my mood," I answer. Apple Bloom nods and gives me a wave before she and her sister leave the room. Lyra and Vinyl leave next, followed by Rarity and Sweetie Belle.

"I'll see you back at the library tonight!" Twilight says to me, leaving the room as well. Huh, so apparently she scheduled that whole studying thing for tonight. Oh well. Not like I have anything else to do. Not being able to read sucks. I really need a hobby, since honestly there's nothing for me to do aside from sit around when I'm not working.

So now Rainbow and I are alone in the room, as the nurse had left to go do something or another. I don't really care.

Well, almost alone. I only now notice that Fluttershy is still here, sitting behind Rainbow's bed where I can't see her.

"Um...I'm really glad you're okay, Rainbow," Fluttershy murmurs softly.

"Eh, like a Scorpios could keep the likes of us down!" Rainbow boasts, causing me to raise an eyebrow. Excuse me, that had been practically all me. "That reminds me. Fluttershy, have you met Seth?"

"Oh...um...yes..." Fluttershy stammers, peering at me shyly from behind her silky pink mane. "Just once though."

"Seth, you'd totally like Fluttershy. She's one of the nicest ponies around," Rainbow says, looking at me. Fluttershy blushes at the praise, while I cross my arms.

"Great," I scoff, not really caring. "So she's the exact opposite of me, then."

"All the more reason to hang with her. Learn by example, right?"

"Whatever." I end the conversation there by turning away from Rainbow and gazing at the ceiling. I don't need a large group of friends. That just means more ponies that have a chance to back-stab me. No, just like before, I'm good with one or two.

"I need to get back to my animals. I'll see you later...I mean...if that's okay with you..." Fluttershy says as she backs out of the room.

"See ya tonight, Fluttershy!" Rainbow calls after her friend. And then there were two. It doesn't take Rainbow very long to get stir-crazy. "Ugh, what am I going to do for an hour?"

"What do I care? Take a nap or something," I snap, leaning back myself, adjusting my body so that my arms are linked behind my head.

"Huh, that's actually a good idea." Rainbow proceeds to turn over and shut her eyes. That just leaves me. Bored, I look around the room until I spot my winter clothes, freshly cleaned and neatly folded on the counter across the room. My phone and wallet are resting next to it, and my rifle is leaning against the wall nearby. Good, they had the sense not to wash my phone. I might have murdered everypony if that happened. Not really, but you get my point.

Maybe I should take a nap too. I expect the nurse will wake us up when it's time for us to go.

* * *

Well, she might have been planning on waking us up, but I actually wake up on my own, just as she walks through the door. I feel a lot better than before, as now only my throat is sore and I have a bit of a lingering headache. The places where I'm still wearing bandages still sting a bit, but better than before. My ribs also don't hurt at all anymore, so I guess that magic did its job.

"Ah, you're awake. I expect you're about ready to get out of here," Redheart notes with a smile. Hell yes I'm ready. But, since I'm still a bit groggy from my nap, I just nod. "All right then, if you'll just sign right here."

Redheart slides the clipboard over to me, along with a quill. There's what I assume is a medical form on the board, but everything is that same Equestrian scrawl, so I have no idea what it says. But I do recognize that little X that you usually sign next to, so I write my name down in cursive there. While I'm doing that, Redheart removes the needle from my arm, wiping away a small bead of blood and bandaging it.

"What language is that?" Redheart inquires curiously after I hand the clipboard back to her.

"English. It's a human language. That's probably worth money right there," I joke, figuring that there'd probably be human enthusiasts out there that would kill for a sample of human language. Redheart giggles a little, and then she extends a hoof to me. Oh, she's trying to help me up. "No thanks, I got this."

I gingerly sit up and climb down from the bed. When my feet hit the ground, I half expect there to be pain,but thankfully there isn't anything more than a slight twinge. As long as I don't spazz out or anything, I should be fine.

The next thing I do is move over to the sink that's in the room and fill up a cup of water. I'm not thirsty though. I walk back over to Rainbow and promptly toss the contents all over her face.

Rainbow immediately awakens, spluttering indignantly and rubbing a hoof in her face. "Agh, what the hay?!" Her face looks so fucking funny that I can't help but laugh at her. "Seth? Can't you wake a pony normally?"

"Nope!" I reply shamelessly, leaning back against a wall. "Get the fuck up. I'm sick of this hospital already."

"What, are we getting released?" Rainbow questions me. Then she notices Redheart smiling at her. "Oh. Sweet!"

Redheart hands Rainbow the clipboard and quill next. Rainbow grabs the quill in her mouth and signs the sheet as well before handing it back. Huh, I wonder if her words are even legible. How the fuck do you write with your mouth?

"Now then, the two of you are free to go. If you'll just try to avoid pony-eating monsters in the future," she jokes. This earns a laugh from Rainbow and a scoff from me.

"Trust me, I'm not going anywhere near that forest. As long as Rainbow stops doing her best to get herself killed, that is," I say, glaring pointedly at the pegasus in question.

"You're one to talk," Rainbow remarks, nudging me with a hoof after she gets down from her bed. Heh, she has a point. "If you stop, so will I."

"What the hell kind of bargain is that?"

"The best kind. Now stop complaining and accept it."

"Whatever. Let's get going now." I don't know about her, but I want to get the fuck out of this hospital. "First, both of you fuck off for a second so I can get dressed."

"Right, your human modesty or whatever," Rainbow recalls, while Redheart just looks confused. "Come on, nurse. He's gotta have his privacy."

I can hear Redheart questioning Rainbow about that as they leave the room. I tune the both of them out as I stride over to the counter and grab my clothes. Tossing the hospital gown (or whatever the fuck they call this piece of fabric they haphazardly draped over me) aside, I proceed to get dressed in my clothes, placing my phone and wallet in separate pockets.

When I go to shoulder my rifle, I notice something different about it. It looks...what's a good word for this...healthier. Like, less shitty than it used to be. The metal is no longer rough and the edges are no longer rugged. It like...looks as good as new. What's up with that?

I shoulder the rifle and walk out into the hallway. Rainbow is there waiting for me, but Redheart's missing. I guess she has other patients to deal with. "About time! Let's get rolling! You gotta go to Twilight's, right?"

"Apparently I do. She has a habit of making my schedule for me," I say, only slightly disgruntled. Like I said, I have nothing better to do.

"That's Twilight for ya," Rainbow agrees, and then we start walking through the hallways of the hospital. Rainbow appears to know her way out, so I follow her.

This place is pretty large. I wonder how I haven't seen this place yet from the outside. Or, maybe I have, and just haven't cared enough to mention it. Yup, that's probably it.

Once we're outside, I notice that the sun is setting. Great, how the fuck am I going to sleep tonight, since I've just woken up from three days worth of sleep?

Also, the town is oddly empty. Like, I know the ponies will be heading home and stuff, but this is more empty than usual. "Where is everypony?" I say. I then try not to groan when I notice that saying "everypony" and "anypony" is becoming almost second nature. Damn these ponies and their linguistics.

"Who knows?" Rainbow replies, clearly knowing about as much as me. Which is to say...nothing.

"Fine with me, I guess. I hate being stared at, anyway."

"Yeah, I'd rather they stare at me. I deserve the attention!" Rainbow jokes, puffing her chest out. I toss a scornful glance her way. She may be my friend, but I'm not so fond of her ego, whether she's joking or not.

"Sure." Rainbow looks a bit put out at my lack of response. I don't know what she expected with a joke like that.

The two of us walk (or fly, in Rainbow's case) to Twilight's place. I know I should call it Golden Oaks Library, but writing that more than once in a single entry is too much work. So it's Twilight's place from now on. Get used to it.

When we approach the building, I notice something odd. The lights are off. I think she lights her place up with candles and magic, maybe, so there's no reason for the lights to be out. I start to get slightly suspicious. "Why are the lights out?" I say to Rainbow as I near the door.

"Good question. I wonder if Twilight's home yet?" she answers. I stare back at her oddly. Rainbow returns my stare ready, smiling a little. Huh...I guess maybe I'm being paranoid. Oh well.

"Fine, I guess I'll wait out here." Impatiently, I flip around and rest my back against the side of the treehouse. Can't believe she's making me wait. I mean really? She seems like somepony who's super obsessed with keeping a schedule, so what the fuck? I'm going to make sure I give her a hard time the next time I see her.

"Nah, it's fine. Just walk on inside. I'm sure at least Spike is home," Rainbow urges me. I raise an eyebrow at that.

"I don't think Twilight will appreciate it if I randomly barge into her house, especially if she's not there," I point out. Rainbow flies closer, nudging me with a hoof.

"And since when have you cared what she thought?" Rainbow's wearing a knowing grin now. That gets me to stand up straight again.

"You have a point." Deciding I don't give a fuck after all, I push open the door to Twilight's place and step inside. The gloom inside overtakes me. It's so dark, I can barely see.

Something's wrong. For some reason, the inside of this place smells like a damn chocolate store. That's all the warning I get. A split second later, the lights turn back on, flooding the room with radiance and revealing the large group of ponies that are gathered there.

"SURPRISE!" They all shout at once. I, having expected nothing more than a simple check-up by Twilight, am startled as hell.

"Son of a bitch!" I exclaim in shock, and then I overbalance and fall backwards, so that Rainbow has to catch me and hold me up. "So...many...ponies...!"

Holy shit, there's so many ponies. Why are there so many fucking ponies? And, what the hell did Twilight do to her living room? That table that's usually in the center is gone, to be replaced by a dance floor, complete with Vinyl's LED lights flashing everywhere. Against the back wall is a large table covered with everything from punch, to muffins, to a giant ass cake. There's also a banner strung across the staircase that reads, "Welcome to Ponyville, Seth Rogers!" That's not even counting all the ponies that showed up.

Firstly, Pinkie Pie. Yeah...judging by the sign, this was her idea. I can't be mad at her too, because I did tell her she could. She's standing at the front of the group, bouncing up and down, a bright grin on her face. Twilight is just behind her, along with Applejack and her family. Yeah, Big MacIntosh, Granny Smith, and Apple Bloom are here. Good, if Apple Bloom hadn't shown up to this, I probably would have judged her for it.

Rarity, wearing yet another ridiculous dress, is standing near them, accompanied by Sweetie Belle. Scootaloo is there as well, next to them. Even Fluttershy is here, shyly hiding behind Twilight.

I can see Lyra, Bon Bon, Derpy, Carrot Top, Cheerilee, and even Zecora by the punch table, all of them smiling at my surprised reaction. Flitter is there as well, along with another mare that looks just like her, only with a more messy hairstyle. What the fuck...why are they all here for this dumb party?

Then, to my shock, I also notice Filthy Rich, Diamond Tiara, and Silver Spoon here as well, though they look more pensive and sheepish than anything else. What are those fuckers doing here?

"Hi, Sethie! Were you surprised? You look surprised, though you really shouldn't have because you said I could throw a welcome party, so I guess this is actually a victory for me since I still surprised you even though you knew it was coming and..." Just like I expected, Pinkie immediately starts spouting off. Her non-stop talking is starting to give me a headache, so I reach up and rub my temples. When she sees that, Pinkie stops stalking mid sentence. "Oh. Right. Sorry!"

"Well...I did kind of ask for this, didn't I?" I admit. Thankfully Pinkie had the sense to stop spouting off. Well, mostly.

"Yessiree!" If Pinkie's smile was any wider, I'd swear it was coming off of her face anime style.

"Well, then what are we waiting for? The surprise part is over, so...where's the music?" I say, waving my hand impatiently.

"Did someone say 'music?!'" And that would be Vinyl. I look up, and sure enough, there she is. Vinyl waves a hoof from behind her tables, the light from her LEDs reflecting off of her shades. She whips out a record from behind the speakers and holds it up. "Pinks, can I get started?"

"Heck yeah you can! Is everypony ready to party?!" Pinkie exclaims, her voice getting even more high pitched, if that's even fucking possible. The resulting cheer from the surrounding ponies is all the confirmation she needs.

Vinyl grins and slaps the record down on the tables, and a happy theme begins to play. It sounds a bit childish actually. I'm about to question her music choice when suddenly Pinkie starts dancing around in front of me. She opens her mouth, and a sinking feeling falls over me. Tell me she's not about to...

_"Oh, Ponyville welcomes you on this joyful winter day,_

_It's really great to have you, we hope you're here to stay!"_

...sing. She is. You know those guys in anime that have those weird little drops of sweat that show up during a dumb moment? That's totally me right now. Are you serious right now? Once again, I feel like I'm in a girls cartoon.

_"We know a new life can be tough but we're all here for you,_

_"Equestria is really great, you'll make some good friends too!"_

At that line, Rainbow touches down next to me and gives me a friendly nudge. Ugh...this is so embarrassing. Please stop.

_"This is a joyous, a very joyous day,_

_Just think of all the fun games we can play!_

_Thanks to you we're all together,_

_We're birds of a feather,_

_Now let's get down and party all the way!"_

Okay, that sounded like a chorus. Does that mean it's over? I mean, she doesn't have a bad voice (though in my opinion, it's more suited for a musical play or something rather than a standalone song), but I feel both embarrassed and slightly ashamed that I even admit that she's not that bad. Just make it be over so I don't have to...wait, what are they all doing?

So yeah, Pinkie repeats the chorus again, only this time every fucking pony in the room (Except for Filthy Rich and his entourage) joins in, trotting around the room. Like they'd rehearsed it or something. All of their voices blend together, so that it sounds like one voice with a lot of depth. I mean, I don't know much about choral theory, but I know that's what you aim for when you're in a choir. That's impressive.

Even so, right now I feel like the guy that everyone sings happy birthday to (I hate that fucking song), who feels super awkward about it.

"Now everypony DANCE!" Pinkie exclaims once the song ends, and Vinyl flips the record over and starts playing some awesome sounding electronic music. With that, the party kicks off. Ponies hit the dance floor and start mingling, though several ponies look like they want to talk to me. Before that, though...

"Pinkie, what the fuck are those things," I snarl in a low whisper just beside Pinkie's ear. She looks up to see me pointing at Filthy Rich, Diamond Tiara, and Silver Spoon. "...doing here?!"

Pinkie frowns a little. "Well, I know you didn't like them, but they told me they had something to say to you, so I invited them anyway. I hope you aren't too mad."

"Of course I'm fucking mad! I nearly died because of those fuckers! Whatever they have to say had better be good, because I'm kicking them out right afterwards!" I snap, my voice rising slightly. Pinkie's ears flatten. "Don't look at me that way. It's my party. I shouldn't have to look at the dregs of life when I should be enjoying myself."

"Aww, Sethie, just give them a chance! You never know, they could surprise you!" Pinkie advises me, her smile returning. As her smile grows, my scowl deepens.

"I don't give second chances. If they wrong you once, they'll do it again. I made that mistake before. I won't make it again," I grunt. I cross my arms and narrow my eyes. In the process I accidentally make eye contact with Filthy Rich across the room. He averts his eyes quickly, looking down at the ground.

"What do you mean? Did somepony make you sad?" Pinkie is attempting to look comforting right now. I'm not buying it. Besides, this is a party. I don't want to think about Janna now.

"Forget it. I'm going to get something to eat." I dismiss her question by turning my back and moving through the crowd of ponies to the food table.

Great, now I'm in a bad mood. At my own party. How can I enjoy this now? Fucking Pinkie inviting those useless scum.

Before I reach the table, I am stopped by Flitter and her unfamiliar friend. Flitter smiles brightly at me. She hesitantly cranes her head forward, almost as if scared that I'm going to slap her or something. What the hell is she doing? That question is answered when she tentatively nuzzles my waist. Seriously? Even she feels the need to invade my personal space now?

"Hey, Seth. I heard about what happened...and...I wanted to thank you," Flitter tells me softly, pulling her head back. The other pony that's with her appears to be...sizing me up or something. The way she's looking at me is a little unsettling.

"For what? I didn't do anything for you," I demand, confused.

"Well, not for me directly, but...Rainbow Dash is my friend. I would miss her terribly if anything happened to her," Flitter explains. That alone is enough to cause my expression to soften slightly. That I can understand. It's that same feeling that drove me out into the forest in the first place.

"Yeah. I get that, I guess. So who's this chick?" I confess, and then quickly change the subject to the pony who is now looking at my hair with an approving look.

"Uh...chick?" Flitter questions. Right, another human expression they don't know.

"Skip it."

"Oh, okay. This is my sister, Cloud Chaser." Flitter turns to her sister and indicates her with a hoof. Cloud Chaser gives me a nod.

"Hey there, I'm Cloud Chaser," Cloud Ch...okay her name is fucking annoying to write. I'm calling her Cloud forever. Actually...dammit, if I call her Cloud, I'll keep picturing that emo with the giant sword. Zack was better anyway. "I must say, when my sis talked about you, she never mentioned that you were so...unique. Do all humans look like you?"

"What a dumb fucking question. Seriously? Do all ponies look like you? I don't think so, since genetic diversity makes that physically impossible!" I deny viciously. Cloud Chaser recoils at my harsh greeting. Flitter winces as well. "So no, they don't. Besides, most of them looked better than me anyway."

"Sorry...but whoa, they look better than _you_? Tell me more!" Cloud Chaser gets this dreamy look on her face. Well, this pony disgusts me. Her flirting is worse than Lyra's.

"Sis, stop! He doesn't like that," Flitter beseeches her sister. She gives me an apologetic look, and starts leading her sister away. "Sorry, Seth. We'll leave you alone now. I'm glad you're okay."

"Fine, good riddance," I huff. Somepony who's not annoying, please talk to me. Well, the next one to reach me is Derpy...who immediately rears up on her hind legs and hugs me around the chest. "What the...oh, hi Derpy."

"I'm so happy to see you, Seth...I was worried," Derpy sniffs, nuzzling her head against my chest. Well...I can't move...and I think she's actually crying somewhat. As coldhearted as I usually act, there's something about this pony that makes me feel legitimately bad when she's feeling bad. So...awkwardly I wrap my arms around her, hoping that she'll stop crying.

"Uh...it's...I'm fine," I stutter a bit. I think it's working, because her sniffles gradually stop, and she finally releases me. A bright smile crosses her face, though I still can't tell what the fuck she's looking at because her eyes are all over the place.

"Want to come get a muffin with me?" Derpy offers, indicating the food table with her head.

"Might as well. Lead the way," I acquiesce, shrugging. Derpy does that little pony squee that they all seem to be able to do and trots over to the table, nearly tripping once in the process.

As I follow her, I notice Rarity looking at me. "What?" I demand.

"Nothing, darling," Rarity replies, a smug smile crossing her face. She then proceeds to sip at a glass of punch delicately.

"You're damn right." I leave her behind after that, cursing myself for giving in to Derpy's adorableness.

Together, Derpy and I gorge ourselves on assorted sweets. Well, by that I mean she ate the crap out of some muffins, while I had a bit of everything, including some of that cake, which is fucking delicious. And it's my party too, so I can have as much as I want.

Just as I'm about to eat another slice of cake, the three ponies that I absolutely didn't want to talk to approach me hesitantly. I set my plate down, my eyes hardening. This is going to be nasty. "Derpy, did you bring your daughter here?" I ask casually. Derpy looks up, her mouth full of muffin. She gulps it all down at once.

"Mhm. I let her play with the other fillies. Why do you ask?"

"I'd like to meet her. Why don't you bring her over here while I talk to these...these ponies?" My request causes Derpy's eyes to light up happily.

"Okay! I'll be right back!" she exclaims, and then she trots into the crowd, but not before grabbing another muffin.

Good, now that she's gone, I can be as nasty as I want. I wouldn't want her to have to see this. I unsling my rifle and place it point down in front of me, stopping their progress. "Why are the three of you even here? I don't give a shit about anything you have to say."

"I understand that. The both of us have wronged one another, but that's not why I came," Filthy Rich starts, looking somber. My eyes narrow. Did he just insinuate that I have something to apologize for? I'm just about to call him out on that when he actually kneels (or whatever the pony equivalent of a kneel is) down in front of me. The two fillies with him do the same thing. "Thank you for saving my daughter. Without you, we would have all died."

"I didn't do it for you, idiot. If Rainbow hadn't been there, I wouldn't have lifted a finger," I tell him bluntly. Filthy Rich winces, but remains as he is.

"I know that, but in saving Rainbow, you saved my daughter. I wasn't kidding when I told you she means the world to me."

"Dad..." Diamond Tiara protests, slightly embarrassed.

"I want to thank you as well," Silver Spoon says. Holy fuck, she can actually speak for herself? "I mean, pearls and glasses can be replaced, but my friend can't be."

"Are you kidding me right now? You don't have to thank me. Besides, I almost asphyxiated your daughter. Why aren't you still trying to kill me?" Yeah, I get that I saved their lives, but only because they happened to be there.

Filthy Rich stands back up, but instead of replying, he nudges his daughter. Diamond Tiara approaches me.

"I...well...you did hurt me, which I'm not happy about, but you were right. I tried doing something for myself, and it didn't work. I want to try and do things on my own now, so I can prove you wrong," Diamond affirms. Huh, even though she's admitting I'm right, she seems to have regained her snark. She turns around, but her father nudges her again. "Oh...right. Thank you for saving me."

"Whatever. Are we done now? Can I get back to my party?" I demand impatiently.

"Yes, we'll stop bothering you now. Thank you for hearing us out," Filthy Rich replies, and then he retreats, taking the two fillies with him. Finally.

Derpy arrives not long after that, a small filly unicorn with her. And it seems like Apple Bloom, Scootaloo, and Sweetie Belle came too. "Seth, this is my daughter, Dinky!" She announces. The small filly looks up at me uncertainly.

Great, more introductions.

* * *

I'm exhausted. That party took a lot out of me, especially since I was still technically recovering.

Right now, I'm sitting at my desk back at Vinyl's place. I've already forced Vinyl to take my rent, leaving me at 17 bits.

That party, holy shit. After meeting Dinky, I'd essentially been suckered into hours worth of food and dancing. This other mare had showed up as well who was a fucking master at playing the fiddle. When she was playing along with Vinyl, man, I was dancing. With Apple Bloom, as well, because she insisted on being close to me.

Derpy is a crazy ass dancer. She wasn't even going to get on the dance floor, but the fillies and I pretty much forced her to. I mean, she had fun, but her limbs were flailing around all the fucking place. Probably because she has no coordination. I almost got clocked in the head once.

Lyra and Cloud Chaser insisted on dancing with me as well. So I said yes...and by yes I mean I let them dance near me, and they could think whatever they wanted.

The party lasted well past midnight. In fact, I think it's like, three in the morning now. My mind is still awake though, buzzing with thoughts about the past week.

Seriously. How could any of this had happened? I have two friends now, and I beat up a giant fucking scorpion constellation thing with dark magical powers that tore up my insides. Yeah, I think this is worth writing about.

I pull out my journal from the drawer in my desk, as well as a quill and inkwell. Now, how to even start this? Eh, what do I care. It's not like anyone is reading this.

_"Well, I never thought something like this would happen. Honestly, I never thought I'd write in this journal ever again, since I felt like I'd pretty much acclimatized to living in this world called Equestria that still reminds me of something out of a vivid acid trip..."_

* * *

Sorry this one took so long, but with finals week and all, there was no way I was getting anything done. To make up for that, I made this chapter longer than usual, clocking at around 9700 words. I also wrote another set of song lyrics in here, but they don't have accompaniment or a tune, sadly. I'm a performer, not a composer.

Arc 2 is over, where Seth finally admits that he has friends in this world of ponies. Granted, his asshole nature isn't going anywhere, but ever so slightly, you can start to see cracks in those defenses.

Now Arc 3 of 6 begins. Of course, arcs 4-6 are going to be MUCH longer than these, so I'm expecting around 500000 words by the time this is done. Anyhow, thanks for reading, and please leave a comment telling me what you think!


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